Yaya's Voice
by Asakust
Summary: After making up with Hikari, Yaya looses her voice. What will happen to their friendship? Yuri shoujo ai Multiple Love Triangles Spoiler Warning! ACN style Yaya: Chapter 13 Up!
1. Prologu I : Yaya

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to XD

Author's Note: this story takes off after episode 14. Also my first Strawberry Panic FanFic. Also with some revisions based on suggestions. The Grammar I can't help much. It might just be my style of writing I guess. OK?... OK! XD

Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice

Prologue: Yaya: The angel wasn't mine.

It's been over a week since Hikari and I made up. Maybe I should say that it's been over a week since she had forgiven me. It was ok at first… but after a few days, I just felt like skipping classes and choir practice. I wasn't in the mood to be there. I still felt very guilty about what I've done to Hikari. She's has never brought it up, but I know things have changed since then…

And something else happened…

Have I been avoiding her? ...

Yeah... I guess have. It's almost a miracle that I have managed to avoid her for this long, seeing that we live in the same room.

It's just that seeing her… is more than enough to make my heart race painfully. Ever since I heard her confess her feelings to Amane-san that night, even though she said it in her sleep… even though she didn't know that she said it… It was painful to hear.

So painful that... I haven't spoken to her in days, in fact… I haven't spoken in days. If someone talked to me, I more or less ignored them. When ordering food, I just pointed. I haven't attended class so that I don't have to see Hikari.

No talking… No singing… No humming… Nothing… until I realized… I couldn't… for some odd reason… I've lost my voice.

I decided to see the nurse about it during class hours, since I was skipping class already. She tells me that she found nothing wrong with my vocal cords; it didn't look swollen or wounded. Hearing that just made me feel bad… or maybe I should say worse. What if it's a new disease or something? Is my luck really that bad now? She then told me that she would try to get a hold of a good doctor in the city for me.

I had to use a piece of paper and pen to ask the nurse not to tell anyone else about it. I didn't want them to worry, especially Hikari. She agreed to keep it confidential, and that she will only discuss it with the doctor hopefully to cure whatever it is that I have. But then she suggested that I would need to tell the teachers and everyone else something more or less believable.

She looked at me for a bit before telling me that she would write a letter for me, at least something to show everyone to explain why I couldn't speak. I found myself smiling at her kind offer and nodded. She then said that I could pick up tomorrow. I thanked her the best way I could before I left the school's infirmary.

I then headed to the school's shop to pick up a new notebook, I would need it for a while and it seemed the logical thing to do. I can't avoid communication forever just because I don't have my voice. Looking back a few years… I regret not learning sign language when I had the chance. But then again, there probably aren't many here that do know how. I then headed back to the dorm room that Hikari and I shared. Classes were still on, so it was no surprise that the room was empty. I decided to take that chance to take a shower.

As the lukewarm water pelted on my body, I could feel goose-bumps rising as the water hit my skin. My long black hair began to stick to me, and ended up slightly tangled when I tried to brush it with my fingers. I began singing... but then no sound came out. I released a quiet sigh, in disappointment. I must have been there for a while; the water was beginning to feel cold on my skin. I then heard a very familiar soft yet high pitched voice along with a loud knock on the bathroom door.

**"Yaya-chan! Are you okay?"** her voice slowly got louder after each call and she seemed really worried. And why wouldn't she be? I have been avoiding her for days. It won't be easy, but I got to brave it no matter how painful it is to look at her… I'm still her friend and I shouldn't make her worry about me. I had better get out and explain to her... more or less what had happened to me.

I turned off the shower, causing the knocking to stop. But since I wasn't answering or should I say couldn't answer she still called out my name... with the same worried tone. I hurried to get out so I barely managed to dry myself and wore a bathrobe, then placed the towel around my hair. I grabbed hold of the door knob, took a deep breath and told myself. 'I can do this!'

I exited the bathroom, with the best smile I could fake and waved my hand at her slightly. I was greeted at the sight of my roommate, her long blond hair slightly wet of what I would guess to be her sweat. Soft blue eyes, gazed at me with a worried glow.

My heart ached just looking at her, I felt like crying but…

"Yaya-chan? Are you okay? Are you still mad?" She bombarded me with questions I could not answer immediately. I felt flustered and a bit confused. Here I am, facing the one person I had worked so hard to avoid for days… wow…I feel really bad.

She asked question after question not bothering to wait for an answer. I had to place my fingers on her lips to keep her quiet for a moment, which caused her to blush a bit and move away… I guess things really have changed. Sure she did that before too… only she didn't have that scared look in her eyes before.

I moved to my table, where I had place the new notebook I had bought earlier. I wrote _'Welcome back Hikari-chan! How was your day?'_ on a page, showed it to her and forced myself to smile.

She read what I wrote and looked quite irritated. "Yaya-chan! What's wrong?! Why have you been skipping class and practice?" I could see tears beginning to form in her eyes. "Why have you been avoiding me? You sleep early, you eat early, you skipped class and choir!" She looked angry, but cute and... Strong.

**"Why aren't you saying anything?!"** She yelled… angrily… a first… and it's my fault.

I could only look at her, saddened, hurt and maybe even scared... and I couldn't explain myself very well, even more so not in this state. But I had to be strong, I can't breakdown. I fought myself to hold back my tears… for Hikari. I opened my mouth, but nothing formed. I could only hold my throat gently and look at her with my slightly watery eyes, hoping she would understand.

She stared at me for a moment; her eyes sad, angry, nervous and ready to leak out tears. I could then see her eyes gaze down at my mouth, then to my hand over my throat. Her eyes widened with worry and apology. "Yaya-chan?!" She cried out worriedly.

I wrote on the notebook again. _'I'm sorry I worried you, Hikari. I seem to have lost my voice. Ha Ha'_ I smiled and acted like I was laughing but the tears I was fighting to hold back were already falling from my eyes, I know I might have sounded and looked stupid right now… but I didn't want Hikari to worry too much about me. It's supposed to be the other way around.

She began shaking; her eyes fell to the floor... I could see her tears falling, flowing more than mine. I then thought of placing a hand on her shoulder to try to comfort her… but stopped myself… I don't have the right to hold her. But to my surprise Hikari suddenly jumped at me, locking me into a tight embrace, I lost balance and we fell onto my bed. To my disappointment nothing came out when tried to I cry out in surprise. Hikari began crying on my chest, clutching the back of my bathrobe tightly. I felt so helpless... I couldn't even return the hug she was giving me… no matter how much I wanted to… Instead my hands rested lightly on her shoulders, where they coincidentally fell when we landed on my bed. It took a lot of effort to take my hands off her, and wipe my eyes of the sight blurring tears.

In between the crying she began to apologize. "I'm sorry Yaya-chan. I thought you were upset with me." she looked up to my face, eyes still in tears. I picked up the notebook which had fallen nearly beside my head. I wrote: _'It's alright Hikari. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I just actually found out myself.'_ and showed it to her. That sentence felt like such a big lie, literally its true… but that wasn't why I was avoiding her.

She gave me a soft yet sad smile before she rolled to my side ending the hug, I felt disappointed and relieved at the same time… of course I didn't let it show. "So... what happened to your voice?" she asked as she sat up and dried her tears with the sleeves of her uniform slowly recomposing herself. I then wrote about going to the nurse and a lie about having some problem with my throat that they don't have a medication for yet, and that it might be a while before I can get my voice back. "That's sounds awful..." I could see tears daring to fall from her eyes again. I slipped up more or less… it wasn't the truth… but it was close.

_'I'll just have to find something else I'm good at! Right?'_ meaning it about the choir that I cannot be a part of at my state. I forced a smile… I loved singing… I loved singing with Hikari… but now I can't, for other reasons besides not having my voice. I could see her look down at the floor again. I have to say something to change the atmosphere. I scribbled _'For now we'll just have to learn hand signals or else I'll be wasting too much paper! HAHA'_ I tried to write it as humorous as possible, I just can't stand seeing her sad.

She could only give me a weak smile and a nod. I patted her hand lightly, almost as if to tell her that 'things would work out somehow'. I stood up, deciding to finish getting dry and changing, I was getting cold. I could feel Hikari watching me, not that I minded. I turned to her; she seemed lost in thought for a while... She was still looking at me even after had finished changing. I scribbled down _'Did you enjoy my strip show?'_ on the note book and showed it to her with a grin on my face. It was an instinctual prank one of many I had played on her to show her cute side. ... Instinct... I have to learn to control that more.

She instantly blushed, very cutely might I add. **"YAYA-CHAN!"** she pouted, again I must say cutely. "Stop teasing me!" She seemed lightly annoyed. I scribbled down an apology and an excuse about lighting up the mood. She seemed to have bought it for now. I laughed inside… relieved that somehow I can probably keep on living with her without exposing myself. Though the thought of asking for a room change did cross my mind… but that would be equivalent to ending our friendship. And I didn't want that.

"We should tell the teachers about it." She stood up and was ready to pull me out of the room. I wrote something about the nurse preparing a note for me to show the teachers tomorrow. She read it and nodded. She sat on my bed and played with her legs. I sat down as well and just looked around the room. It's so boring not to be able to say anything not to mention awkward. And my not being able to speak seems to make Hikari rather nervous around me. But then again I can think of a lot of reasons why she would be.

Minutes passed and my eyes just happened to wander around the room. I then saw the time and remembered that it was about time for Amane-san's riding practice. I know she's a diligent watcher of her horse-riding, because of her feelings for Amane-san. Or maybe she was really just watching Amane-san. It pained me to even think of telling her about it... But it was also painful seeing her.

I looked at her... and decided: It was what's best for her. I patted her shoulder and pointed at the clock; she remembered and almost ran out of the room instantly yelling "Ah! Amane-sempai!" But as she opened the door, she stopped for a moment and asked "Will you be okay?" she looked at me quite worried again. I wonder if I will regret this… I nodded and smiled, motioning my hand playfully as if to shoo a little bird. She then smiled, said "I'll see you later then." and left, closing the door behind her.

I released a deep silent sigh and dropped on to the bed. Tears came streaming from my eyes which I immediately wiped away and tried to hold the rest back, in case Hikari decided to come and stay with me. Minutes passed and so did my wishful thinking. I decided to go to out; maybe visit the library for a while hoping for something to occupy my time, or maybe just have early dinner and go to bed.

End of Prologue

Author's Note: yeah I had decided to go with the point of view writing for this one. And no I'm no expert at voice related illness or anything… Please Review.

Oh and how can we request a separate link list for Strawberry Panic? I mean if you search the Misc. you'll see quite a few Stories, sometimes even more than other Animes with their own link list. ;;


	2. Prologue II : Hikari

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to XD

Author's Note: Sorry for the delay was having trouble getting into Hikari's mind set XD and I think it could be better. Read and Review please

Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice

Prologue: Hikari: Keeping our bonds.

I had been running all over today, Yaya-chan wasn't anywhere I thought she'd be. I had checked the library, the fountain, the church, the church's garden… I hope nothing has happened to her. I was forced to give up for today… I decided to head back to our room and freshen up.

I was surprised to hear the shower running. Yaya-chan is here. I quickly ran to shower door, jiggled the doorknob to open it but it was locked. We don't usually do that. I then knocked and called out to her. "Yaya-chan! Yaya-chan!" seconds later, I hear the water stopping but she didn't answer my call. I could feel my heart skipping beats, but pumping rather hardly. "Yaya-chan!"

She opened the door, revealing herself wearing her white bathrobe and kept her wet black hair wrapped with a towel. She just smiled at me while her amber eyes looked like they were shaking almost fearful, but it barely registered in my mind. "Yaya-chan? Are you okay? Are you still mad?" I asked her question after question, panic and worry had gotten the best of me... I didn't even wait try to wait for her to answer. She looked panicked for a moment, but then she placed a finger on my lips. I instantly blushed, stopped talking and took a step back.

She just looked at me, sadly, before moving to her desk and picking up a notebook. She wrote something, showed it to me and smiled. It said: _'Welcome back Hikari-chan! How was your day?'_ I felt angry, I didn't really understand why? Was she still so upset that she's not talking to me anymore? I thought we were through with that…

"Yaya-chan! What's wrong?! Why have you been skipping class and practice?" My vision was getting blurry as I fought back the tears. "Why have you been avoiding me? You sleep early, you eat early, you skipped class and choir!" I gave her a moment to answer, but she just looked at me… It made me angry.

**"Why aren't you saying anything?!"** I yelled... I fought the urge to clear my throat. I just stared at her, mixed feelings rushing in me. I stared at her, waiting for her to say something. I saw her moving her lips, but I heard nothing. Her hand moved up to touch her lips and then her neck. Her eyes never once left its lock from mine. I slowly glanced down to her neck, trying to make sense of it. Then it hit me… the writing, the silent treatment… she's.

"Yaya-chan?!" I cried out worriedly hoping it was one of her jokes, a cruel joke that I'll forgive if she stopped now. But sadly she just wrote on her notebook again. _'I'm sorry I worried you, Hikari. I seem to have lost my voice. Ha Ha'_ she acted like she was laughing, but I could see the tears that began flowing from her eyes almost as fast as mine. I looked down… trying to absorb everything. My tears began to wet the floor.

Without really thinking, leaped at her and held onto her tight. We fell on her bed and I just cried on her chest. I didn't know how long I cried. I was feeling guilty, for lashing out at her like I did. I made Yaya-chan cry.

Yaya-chan didn't hug me like she usually does, she just lightly held my shoulders… I must have hurt her too. Feeling her hands move, I slowly looked up a little to see that she was wiping her tears. "I'm sorry Yaya-chan. I thought you were still upset with me."

She just looked at me and wrote something again. _It's alright Hikari. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I just actually found out myself._' I couldn't help but smile, when she forgave me and apologized as well. I rolled off her, and tried to dry my tears. I felt relieved somehow, that we somehow resolved that issue without it getting any worse. "So… what happened to your voice?" I asked. She answered it in writing; telling me that she had seen the nurse about it, that so far she couldn't medicate her yet and that it might be a while for her voice to return. "That sounds awful…" was all I could say. She just smiled and wrote that she'll just have to live with it for a while, do something else she was good at and maybe even learn sign language so as not to waste too much paper… That's Yaya-chan alright. I could only give her a weak smile.

She then stood and dried off. I just watched her as she took her robe off and change into something homey casual. I didn't really intend to stare. I was lost in thought, I was admiring how strong Yaya-chan is. She was dealing with her problems alone. I couldn't possibly do that in my case. I would probably be crying for weeks if I lost my voice… but I know Yaya-chan would be there.

Out of nowhere, Yaya-chan places the note book in front of my eyes. Written down was something that made me blush like mad. _'Did you enjoy my strip show?'_ I read and looked at her, with a wide grin on her face. **"YAYA-CHAN!" **I couldn't help but yell at her. "Stop teasing me!" Yaya-chan quickly apologized, saying that she was just trying to lighten us both up. So I dropped it, and forgave her like I always do.

I then realized that we should tell the teachers about it. I told her that and was ready to pull her out of the door with me. But she stopped me, telling me that the nurse was writing her a letter for that tomorrow. I guess she really had thought this out.

We just sat on her bed for a while. If we wanted to talk about something, there was a barrier for her to do so right now.

I'm still at shock about Yaya-chan loosing her voice. She was the Choir's Ace, everyone loved her singing. She must have been so depressed loosing it.

'I'm sorry I didn't notice Yaya-chan…'

I wallowed in pity and self annoyance in not being able to do something for Yaya-chan after all she's done for me since the day we meet. She's kept me company, cheered me up, got me into the choir, sang songs with me, and protected me, and even helped me with Amane-sempai.

We had our differences every now and again, mostly small things, and Yaya-chan always found a way to make things right…

Almost… but it was only that one time… I recalled that night, I was happy to be home.

To thank Yaya-chan for helping me so much that day, I was going to give her a Sakura colored sea shell. But then Yaya-chan acted differently then… stole my first kiss and started touching me in weird places. I remembered pushing her hard and crying, even when she finally realized what she had done I was still too shocked to forgive her. But we got thru that. And now that Yaya-chan lost her voice and I thought that she was still beating herself up for that.

I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice the time. I was surprised to feel Yaya-chan tapping my shoulder and motioning for me to look at the clock. It was 4:15. "Amane-sempai!!" I yelled and almost bolted out of the room. But something stopped me… I had just found Yaya-chan… I found out that she's suffering… I shouldn't be leaving her alone right now!.. But I really want to see Amane-sempai. I turned to her, half worried about her and half pleading that she'll make me go. "Will you be ok?" I asked.

She only paused for a second, smiled and waved her hand at me playfully motioning for me to go already. I smiled thanking her for making that decision for me. Yaya-chan is so strong, I wish I could be more like her. I can't even imagine what my life would have been here if I had not met her that day.

"I'll see you later then." Without a second thought and with a warming heart. I raced out of the dorm room quickly closing the door behind me.

I don't usually run in the halls, it's unladylike and I know it's not allowed but I had to hurry. Fortunately enough I did not get caught by the sister in charge nor did I run in to anyone and cause them trouble. I quickly headed for the field where Amane-sempai practices her riding.

I had arrived to see that she was still practicing. For a moment there I thought I was going to be too late. As I was catching my breath I noticed that she was looking at me. I could feel my cheeks instantly burn up, I know that they were already red from all the running I had done this afternoon. I smiled and gave her a soft wave. She smiled and nodded in acknowledgement. I felt slightly disappointed that she didn't wave back, but then that would probably cause the other girls to squeal louder, so it was ok. I watched her road … her beautiful crimson eyes concentrated on the horse would travel, her short blue hair waving with the wind. The determined look on her face and the slight blush she held, which reminded me of the time she said she was embarrassed to be watched by so many that she had a hard time practicing.

The remainder of her practice lasted for about half an hour, before she headed to the stables with her horse. The rest her fans began returning to the dorm or began heading to their homes. I had stayed there, sitting under the tree where we first talked. I remember that day so clearly…

I was disheartened… after the screw up I had caused during the congratulations ceremony for Amane-sempai. I was so nervous that I had sung ahead of everyone… even before the song began. I was so embarrassed and I felt like quitting the Saintly Chorus, our choir… I had told Yaya-chan that. She tried her best to cheer me up, saying that there are other chances for me to sing for Amane-sempai. But I felt so bad that I couldn't sleep. I walked outside that night, and prayed at the Maria statue by the small fountain. Eventually I fell asleep in the cold of the night. When I woke up it was near dawn. I found myself walking to horse riding field, maybe partially hoping Amane-sempai was there. I began singing; using my memory of her riding here during her practices to picture she was there. Imagine my surprise when Amane-sempai herself came up to me riding her horse. We talked a while and she had cheered me up... she even lent me her Jacket. I smiled at the good memory.

Minutes later I smiled to see Amane-sempai as she walked up to me from the stables. "Hello Hikari." She greeted and climbed off the white fence that usually kept the horses in; with that soft smile that just made me smile and warm up inside. She then sat beside me and asked "Is something wrong Hikari?"

I just looked at her slightly confused. "You've been acting a little off. Is Nanto-san still avoiding you?" Amane-sempai was observant or I just couldn't hide these things. I had told her about the Yaya-chan avoiding me and everyone days ago. I decided to tell her about what happened earlier; how I found Yaya-chan back in our room, how I got a bit mad at her for avoiding me and about her loosing her voice.

"I see…" she looked at the sky for a while, thinking about what to say. She then looks at me and gives me her opinion. "I'm guessing that she's been avoiding you and everyone because she feels awkward about loosing her voice." I hoped it was that simple. I just nodded and tried to ponder about it.

The next thing she said really surprised me. "Or maybe she's in love with someone and is trying to make sense of her feelings. Then she lost her voice." I never would have guessed that. I nearly screamed when I heard it. "That can't be!"

I thought that there was no way that she wouldn't tell me if she was. She's my best friend, I'm her best friend. We know each other that deeply right? She would right? My mind flashed the memory of her kissing me that night I returned from my date with Amane-sempai. I began thinking that maybe Amane-sempai was right, and maybe Yaya-chan was so dazed that she kissed me that night, maybe imagining I was that girl.

Amane-sempai began giggling. I just stared at her dumbfounded. "I'm sorry Hikari. I was just teasing you." Teasing? … I haven't told Amane about that night. I figured it was a mistake between friends, no one really needed to know about it.

I almost jumped in surprise when I felt her hand on my shoulder. I looked at her, she just smiled at me. "Are you still worried about her?" she asked. I nodded. "I think you should just give her time Hikari. She probably upset without her voice and avoided you and everyone because she didn't want to take out any frustration she had on you or anyone else and maybe was hoping that her voice would come back soon. Soon enough that no one even needed to know she lost it in the first place. I believe you told me that she has a reputation of being the choir's ace? " I nodded again.

Hearing Amane-sempai's insight somehow made me feel better. I smiled and nodded. "I guess so. Thank you Amane-sempai." I couldn't help but admire Amane-sempai more.

She then stood and offered me her hand. "It's getting dark, we should get back. It should be near dinner time when we get back to the dorm building." I nodded and took her hand; she then gently helped me up from where I had comfortably sat. We then headed back to the dorm together.

On the way back, I was enjoying the moment that I was with Amane-sempai. My eyes mostly focused on the ground, keeping my feet walking at the pace and direction hers went. To my surprised she stopped. I looked up and our eyes met. "Hikari?" I didn't understand why, but I suddenly felt nervous that I stuttered a "Y-yes?" in reply. She just smiled at me, with the same gentle eyes she always held.

"Would you like me to talk to her?" She asked. I let out a soft, surprised and confused "huh?" The question barely registered so she asked again. "Would you like me to talk to her?" I just stared at her for a moment taking a second or two to realize she was referring to Yaya-chan, I was considering if I should let Amane-sempai try to find out what I can't. I thought to myself, that if I can't understand Yaya-chan… who can? I was going to say no, but for some reason… I nodded.

She smiled "Okay. I'll talk to her when I get the chance." There was a sad and worried glint in her eyes when she said that. I felt her hands on my shoulders, gently squeezing, that somehow helped me relax. "Thank you! Amane-sempai." I meant it. I was at a lost of what to do for Yaya-chan, so much that even if they weren't friends I thought that Amane-sempai could do a better job at helping Yaya-chan than I could.

Amane-sempai just kept on smiling and said that she was glad to help. We then headed into the dorm. It was nearing dinner time and both of us needed to wash up. We said our goodbyes and goodnight incase we failed to see each other later. I headed back to our room, wondering if Yaya-chan was doing ok since I left her.

When I entered the room I was surprised to find the room without the lights on, I was even more surprised to find Yaya-chan already sleeping on her bed. But I decided to make sure that she wasn't just taking a nap. I sat beside her, lightly rubbed her shoulder and called to her softly. "Yaya-chan? Yaya-chan?..." She shifted a little to shrug off my hand. I looked at her and noticed the small water stains on her pillow, I realized that she had been crying. Was she crying when I left? Or was she crying in her sleep… now I feel guilty for leaving her a while ago. I then saw her lips move as if mumbling something in her sleep, but I'm not good at reading lips so I had no idea what she just said. I didn't try to wake her up after that, she really must have been depressed and maybe all that hiding made her tired.

I did what was routine for me after that, took a nice warm bath, got into a clean uniform after placing the dirty one into the our laundry. Before heading down to have dinner with everyone, go back to our room and do my homework before bed. I was hoping that Yaya-chan would wake up while I was bathing, that way we could eat together again and maybe talk a bit. But sadly that didn't happen. I suppose there would be another chance tomorrow; after all she didn't hide this time.

I woke up just about the same time I do every morning. Yaya-chan wasn't on her bed, that wasn't unusual. She tends to wake up earlier than I do, and is usually prepared to school or is in the shower when I wake up. But like the past few days, today was different. I wonder if she's still upset. I know we made up already, and she says she'll be back in class today. Where could she be?

I decided to get ready for school first. I showered and changed into my school uniform. I took the time to check myself at the mirror, before going out the door and heading to the dining hall. Maybe Yaya-chan would be there. At least that's what I hoped.

I arrive at the dining hall. The room was filled with students from all three schools… but no Yaya-chan. Our usual seats are still empty. I frowned; I was worried about Yaya-chan.

My thoughts were so filled with Yaya-chan that I failed to notice someone sitting beside me as I ate. Only was my train of thought broken when a familiar voice called me, the one voice that can cause my body to feel warm, tingly, and very happy. I turned and smiled to see Amane-sempai. "Amane-sempai! Good Morning!" I could feel myself blushing as I smiled and looked at her.

"Good Morning, Hikari." She smiled at me, which made me feel even warmer. I felt a little embarrassed that I didn't notice her sit beside me. She smiled nodded and ate breakfast. I did too.

I was busy eating my omelet and trying to keep my face from blushing any harder when she called my attention. "Hikari?" I had a spoon in my mouth as I turned to her. I let out a small "Hmm?" to acknowledge her call.

"Would you like to go out again this weekend?" My eyes open wide and I could feel my smile threatening to spill the food I had just placed into my mouth. I chewed and swallowed… almost choking. And answered rather excitedly "I'd love too!" She smiled at me and nodded. She then tells me that she'll pick me up in my dorm room at 8 am. I smiled and nodded shyly to her.

She then gets up as she finished her breakfast, and takes her tray with her. "I have to take care of Star Bright, so I'll see you later, Hikari." I nodded to her with the same shy smile. She smiled as well before turning and heading to have her dishes cleaned. I just watched her till she had left the dining room. I quite sure I was already dreaming of my date with her. Had it not been for Tsubomi-chan I wouldn't have realized that I was day dreaming instead of eating. I inwardly laughed at her comment about me becoming as dazed as Yaya-chan. Yaya-chan isn't like that. … is she?

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Author's Notes: I think I did a better job in Yaya's Prologue. Anyway Please Review


	3. Chapter I : Yaya

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes:

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

I should have made this clear when I started… oh well ;;

Please Review!

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Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice

Chapter 1: Yaya: Hiding my feelings

I slept early yesterday, right after dinner. Why? ... Now that I asked myself, I probably just felt awkward and pathetic not being able to speak, and I got used to this early routine after avoiding Hikari the past week. Now it's just 4am and I'm already wide awake, I remain laid on my bed hoping to fall asleep again. I released a quiet sigh as I looked at my roommate's sleeping face.

_'She's so cute'_ instantly popped into my head. I had to mentally kick myself to keep me from daydreaming...

I really have to get over her.

I then forced myself to turn to my other side so that I would be facing the wall beside my bed. It wasn't as appealing to look at compared to Hikari's sleeping face, but this was for the best. She has Amane-san now, and it seems that their relationship is beginning to develop... what kind of a friend am I, if I interfered with that. What kind of friend was I for trying to take her like that? I still can barely believe I did what I did that night.

I recalled that something like this happened the day after Hikari and I made up. No! That would be an understatement. Those were exactly the thoughts that I had that day. I hated myself for what I did. I regret that maybe... even after she said we'll be best friends forever... That eventually she will become distant from me. And I can only blame myself for that.

I felt like crying, nothing new. But I can't chance Hikari seeing me cry! I'm sure that would hurt her. I decided to take shower. Sure it was early and the water would probably be freezing cold at the start. But at least I could cry in there a while. I got up, got my uniform ready and stepped into the bath.

I was right the water was cold, my teeth chattered for a few seconds before the water began warming up. I just stared down at drain, letting my tears mix with the warming water. I was crying... very hard… and if it wasn't for me loosing my voice. Hikari would probably have heard me now. I slowly got down to my knees, my legs just felt weak. As if loosing all will to stand at all… and just cried.

I stepped out of the shower probably about 30 minutes later. I felt a little better. At the very least enough not to break down like that in public. I then dried off and changed into my uniform. It was still so early, but I decided I didn't want to stay in this room or to be more accurate too close to Hikari. Just looking at her increases the guilt and pain I feel. I gathered my things into my bag except for the new notebook, which I would probably need to use a lot. I stepped out of the room quietly, even slowly closing the door so that the lock won't make a sound. From there I had walked into the barely lit dining room.

It was nice to know that there were people awake this early, even if it were the keepers and cooks. I left my things at my usual chair only taking the new notebook with me. I knocked at the kitchen, and was greeted by the head cook. "Ah! Good morning! Can I help you?" she greeted me with a smile. I was able to quickly glance down at her name tag just so I spelled her name right then wrote _'Good Morning Tendo-san! I'm sorry to disturb you so early in the morning. But do you have anything ready to eat?'_

The brown haired lady seemed surprised about me writing my response and was about to ask about it, but seemed to have decided to get me something to eat first. She grabbed some chopped up ham and onions and a few green vegetables from the bowls that the kitchen helpers were filling. Placed about a dozen slices bread on the toaster and broke a few of eggs. She then began making an omelet which would probably be enough for a few people; the aroma was almost making me drool.

She then called everyone to stop what ever their doing and have breakfast. She then handed me a plate with a serving of Mixed Ham and vegetable Omelet a few toasts and a special Hollandaise sauce that just made my morning. She asked me to accompany her for a while I had no reason to say no. She then asked me why I was using my notebook. I then wrote about having some problems with my throat that might make me mute for a while. Even I really didn't know the reason; just that it wasn't something about my vocal cords but that I left out of my explanation.

She seemed to have bought it. I felt a little bad for hiding things, but I would probably have a lot more trouble explaining that I have no idea what's wrong with me either. I continued eating the delicious breakfast that the cook had given me. She then spared me by not inquiring about my voice. Instead she began asking my name, how old I was, what classes I like, did I like being in Spica. I answered them all in writing of course. She then asked me what club was I in. I guess she kind of guess what when had my hand rub my throat.

She moved the topic to the sauce she served with the omelet, asking if I liked it. I didn't really know why but I found myself feeling lively enough to answer her, I wrote with a big smile _'I loved it! It really made my morning! Thank You!'_ I then saw a glint in her eyes. "Yaya-chan Do you like cooking?" She asked smiling at me. I nodded and wrote that I wasn't bad at it.

"Well if you like you're welcome to come in the kitchen and I can teach you some." I was surprised by her offer and I have to say a little reluctant. "You don't have to decide now." I'm guessing she could see my hesitation; I could only smile and write a message that I'll think about it. It could be something to keep my mind of Hikari, though I'll probably end up with a few cuts and burns if I do. Much to my surprise I find myself silently giggling at the thought.

She cleaned up our plate, I couldn't voice out that I will to clean up for her for obvious reasons. But she said something about me making the best of my morning. I bowed to thank her; she smiled and waved as she disappeared back into the kitchen.

I then headed to school. I must be crazy to be at school at 5:15 am. I decided to drop by the school's infirmary, just incase the nurse left the note somewhere easy to see. I arrived much to my surprise to see the nurse actually there. I had written a page for _'Good Morning!'_ in my notebook. I could see the nurse's sleepy smile when I showed it to her. "Good Morning! Nanto-san. Here's the note for you to show your teachers." She handed the folded piece of paper to me. I took it and bowed softly as thanks. I opened it and checked the contents. Not that I didn't trust the nurse, I just wanted to know what I said so I can back the letter up if I need to.

The letter describes that I'm suffering from some sort of throat ailment and that the nurse is incapable of medicating it but sees that it will not a big hindrance for me to attend class. Though she advices that I am to see a doctor in the city when I have the time.

I wrote _'Thank You this will do fine.'_ She then smiles and tells me "You're welcome, Nanto-san. Oh yes… I have called the doctor, and have asked for an appointment is Saturday a good time?"

I thought about it for a bit, I usually hang out with Hikari on weekends. We'd do our homework and projects together, then practice our singing or just simply enjoy each other's company. But after I had I thought about it... I don't really have much to do this weekend except homework. I sadly turned to the nurse and nodded. She smiled at my approval and said that she'll inform me of the time later. I bowed and left the room.

I entered the classroom, immediately heading for my seat. I noticed quite a pile of papers placed in my drawer, surely all the printouts for all the lectures I missed. I browsed thru them and tried to answer as much as I can, when I got stuck at something I take short breaks and draw something on my notebook.

A couple of hours passed and the students began coming in. Some of our classmates came in and began throwing questions at me. Can't say I blamed them. I showed them the note that the nurse gave me, and it seemed to have answered most of their questions.

Hikari then came in. "Yaya-chan!" I smiled and waved at her, but then I noticed that she had a slightly annoyed expression painted on her face. "Where were you this morning!? I couldn't find you anywhere." I let out a silent nervous laugh. I should have probably left a note. I then wrote _'I'm sorry Hikari. I woke up really early this morning. I decided to come to school early to get some of my work done.' _I smiled as I waved the thick pile of print outs.

She let out a sigh, relief? Or maybe giving up whatever made her feel like trying to argue and sat down at her seat beside me. I have to admit... me not being able to talk seems to be bringing out a new side of Hikari, she's not usually this aggressive or irritable. Or maybe it was something else that caused it... I found myself staring at her lips for a moment but luckily she didn't seem to notice.

Classes soon began for us. I took the time wait for the teacher outside before it began. She merely nodded and told me she'll try to remember not to ask me something that will take too long to write. Classes were pretty much the same the whole day, sure I had to put an extra effort to catch up but it was ok. I was actually glad for the extra work, if it weren't for this I'd probably caught myself looking at Hikari more than I probably should.

During lunch I had practically raced to the Spica's Cafeteria as soon as the teacher had dismissed us, I didn't pull or invite Hikari. For one, I was really hungry I had an early breakfast after all. Two, we probably needed the space. And three, she would probably be off to meet with Ama... Ootori, yes Ootori-san for lunch. I sighed inwardly, feeling slightly bad for beginning to call Hikari's love interest by her last name... but I do feel spite against her, even though it was not her fault. I guess I can only really blame myself for being mean.

I quietly sighed again. I eating my sandwich and soup, and was awkwardly surprised by a hand holding my shoulder. I shuddered and almost screamed, actually I did scream but like before no sound could be heard.

I turned to see who it was, and was even more surprised to see a slightly red faced Hikari. She was panting, as if she had ran around the school. I began writing _'Hi! Hikari, would like to...'_ but I didn't get to finish. **"YA ... YA ... Chan..."** she said quite angry and frustrated. I let out a silent and scared laugh. She looked at me with her blue eyes burning with an anger I've never seen before.

**"Why did you just leave me like that?!"** She yelled. I made a gesture for her to keep her voice down. **"Don't ssh me! Yaya-chan. Why are you avoiding me?!..."** Surely I had no means to quickly answer. I had to think of something fast though, I could already see a lot of our schoolmates beginning to stare at the scene.

I bowed my head and placed my hands together in form of apology. Then quickly wrote down in a very ugly and hurried penmanship _'I'm sorry Hikari! I was really hungry, I wasn't thinking.' _Sure it was sort of a lie, but now that I thought about it, I was telling the truth… technically…I guess wasn't really thinking of her feelings then. Hikari then looked at my just about finished plate of sandwiches and bowl of soup. She sighed and sat beside me.

I'm really beginning to think that Hikari's is changing a little. It's kind of cute in its own way. I handed her my glass of water, she must be thirsty after all that running as she drank it all in one go. She slumped on the table after drinking, still trying to catch her breath. I tried not to look at her too much.

I then saw the one person I didn't really want to see. Still in her Horse riding outfit, Ootori-san walked in to the school cafeteria. I noticed her looking for someone and trying not to be obvious about it, of course I didn't have to think too much about it to know who she was looking for.

I tapped Hikari shoulder. She looked at me with a wondering look. I forced a smile, which I found very tiresome, and pointed at Ootori-san. She looked surprised at the same time very happy that her crush was here. She then stood to go to her, telling me to wait for her. I noticed that a genuine smile crept up Ootori-san's lips as she saw Hikari walk over to her. Not that I blame her… I tend to do that myself... before…

I decided I should go… I felt sad seeing them together, YES… I admit it. I am Jealous of Ootori. I mentally kicked myself as I noticed that I skipped out of the honorific at the end of her surname. I'm definitely becoming a mean person. I sighed to myself.

I still had much work to catch up with and I really don't want to face either of them right now. I decided to leave a not for Hikari on the table. I wrote that I went back to the classroom because I wanted to catch up quickly. Though it was true, I still felt I was lying. I tore the page out of my notebook, folded it twice and wrote: "Hikari" and was about to leave it and the table when heard Ootori-san called me.

"Nanto-san." I turned to look at her. I faked a smile and tried my best not to show any hostility against her, unlike the last time we came this close to each other. For one she was the most popular girl in school. Another was I don't want Hikari to know that I disliked her. I took the time to think and write my reply to her. But before I could, she taps my shoulder lightly. "Please follow me. I would like to talk to you."

I had reasons to decline her request. I certainly didn't want to talk to her, especially now that I can't talk. And I was about to tell her off too… but then I saw Hikari, with a wishful look on her face, which meant that she wants me to be friends with Ootori-san. I pocketed the note I was suppose to leave for Hikari, I waved to her and gave her a reassuring smile before following Ootori-san's lead. I saw questioning looks of many of our schoolmates. Particularly of Tsubomi-chan's, I bet she's going to be bothering me about this one when she gets the chance.

Ootori-san led me outside, to the stables to be exact. It must be her comfort zone. We walked around in silence for a while, I had really no choice in the matter. She seems to be looking around checking the area for other students. I can only assume she didn't want to be seen talking to anyone unless it was Hikari or for related school reasons. Or she didn't want to be seen with me as I wouldn't want to be seen with her. We then reached a large stone under a tree's shade.

"Sit down." She said, it wasn't an order but having no voice made me feel it was. If I didn't lose my voice I'd prefer to remain standing. But then again if I didn't I'd probably not be here.

I did as I was told, I sat on the large rock that we students have long used as a bench, looked up into nowhere in particular just to avoid eye contact with her and waited for the start this… "Talk".

At the corner of my eye I could tell that she was looking at me… "I know our first meeting…" she paused, judging from her voice she seemed very nervous but there's more, something else that I can't seem to point out right now... then again I don't really care. But I know she was trying to be acquainted with me, of course the only reason I could think of for her to even bother trying is Hikari.

It felt weird, to be out here with her. I bet almost everyone in school would want to be in my place right now. She didn't talk after that, was I that intimidating? I smiled inwardly… the thought of "The Prince of Spica" was afraid of me amused me, but that didn't last long… I quickly shrugged off the thought and randomly decided to open my notebook and began sketching. I roughly made a drawing of the scene; the horse track, the stables, the trees around it…

"You're good at that." She said, I turned my head just a tiny bit and saw her leaning uncomfortably close to me. I gasped in surprise and dropped the notebook as my body suddenly jumped away from her. Had I not been mute, I had probably released a loud scream just then.

"Ah! Watch out!" she said loudly as she tried to grab me before I fell off the rock we were sitting on. I felt her hand clasp on my left wrist, then a stinging pain, which I temporarily ignored thanks to the pain of hitting my behind on the ground and a few randomly placed stones.

"You're bleeding…" I heard her whisper. I had my eyes close trying to recover from all the random pain when I felt something warm and wet touching my wrist. I open my eyes to see Ootori kneeling in front of me and… she was kissing, licking and suckling on my wounded wrist. What shocked me was she had this worried yet blissful expression on her face. I felt embarrassed, awkward and very angry. I hurriedly pulled my hand away from her gazing angrily at her. She looked at me, the almost uncaring smile she gives her fans wasn't there, replaced by a worried frown. She stood up and offered her had to me "I'm sorry. I didn't m…

I quickly slapped her hand, surprising her enough to stop what she was saying. I wasn't really thinking right now. I stood on my own, dusted my uniform a little then picked up my notebook.

'_I don't like you.'_ I thought as a looked at her. _'And just because Hikari choose you doesn't mean I have to start liking you too…'_ I never liked her, but I didn't really hate her either. But now I do… so much that I want nothing to do with her. I'm such a bitter person.

She remained silent, but not once breaking eye contact. Her eyes looked saddened and pained almost as if she had heard my thoughts when I thought them. I was quite sure this isn't getting anywhere. I then very lightly bowed in an almost insulting way and turned around to walk away.

"Wait a minute." She rushes to catch up to me and takes hold of my shoulder. I stopped to glare at her before shaking the hand off and continued to walk away. She then grabbed my injured wrist, causing me to instantly wince in pain and dropping the notebook.

"Please wait! Yaya-san." I stopped.

'_Who gave her the right to call me by my name?!'_ I turned to her, and mouthed: "I hate you." I then slapped her left cheek hard causing her hand to let go of mine and touch her reddening skin. She just stared at me, almost fearfully.

I didn't bother picking up the notebook, I figured it would only give her time to think of something to keep me here to try this talk of hers. I began walking back to the school without looking back. Deciding that I'd visit the nurse to get this wound cleaned and treated. Then maybe skip the rest of the classes for today…

Later that day… I had managed to avoid Hikari enough to keep her from asking anything that happened between me and her beloved. _'I'm such a bitter woman.'_ I inwardly sighed at the thought. I was still thinking of my excuse, but then again if that woman decides to honestly tell Hikari what I did… I guess lying isn't going to help me much as she would surely listen to that woman instead of me.

I looked at my bandaged wrist, and recalled the feeling when her lips were on it… I felt hopelessly confused. _'Why did I act like that?'_

I had noticed that some students looked at me nervously and some with hostility. I bet they saw us a while ago. That woman is popular after all, I wouldn't disregard the possibility that she has stalkers here in the school.

My thoughts were then interrupted when a certain pink haired underclassman sat in front of me with an angry look in her face. With the new notebook I had bought before my visit to the infirmary I wrote: _'Tsubomi-chan, are you doing anything tomorrow?_'

… to be continued.

Author's Notes: If some had guessed that the cook was Kasumi Tendo … Congratulations XD Yeah I know I didn't really make a good job for anyone to realize who she was but ;; what the heck.

I recently thought that my rotational character POV narration style might not be the best way for this story to be told, even though I like it this way. So I may or may not release a different version ;; while continuing this one.


	4. Chapter II : Amane

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes: This chapter was revised!

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

Please Review!

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 2: Amane: What is it about you?**

Yesterday, I had asked Hikari if she would like me to talk to her best friend, Nanto Yaya. Although to be very honest, I'm actually quite anxious about doing so, because if I recall correctly, my first meeting with the girl was barely civil…

It was one of those rare afternoons, where almost everyone who watches me practice has something they cannot leave in order to watch me, where I could actually enjoy my ride in peace. Then I spotted her, leaning on the tree where Hikari and I first met. She looked like she had her head in the clouds, apparently very deep in thought. There was this gloomy air around her, like something incredibly bad had happened and that she is at a lost on how to fix it.

Normally I wouldn't have approached her like this, it was out of character for me, but then I recalled that I had approached someone before… Hikari. I know this and that aren't the same. This girl wasn't singing, nor was it a misty morning… the only similarity was that this girl was also depressed, maybe more than Hikari was then. And with those thoughts in mind I had found myself ordering Star Bright to walk towards the raven haired girl.

"You're…" I called out to her; I was almost surprised that her expression suddenly changed. She looked at me and slowly approached the fence, she looked almost angry or she was angry. Why? I do not know. "Hikari-kun's friend right?" I asked, and expected that she'd introduce herself. It was careful question and safe conversation starter. I choose it because neither of us had been introduced to each other, although I do not doubt she knows my name.

"Hikari is at the Saintly Chorus practice right now." She informed me in a cold tone. But I knew as much, Hikari had informed me on her entire schedule for the rest of the semester after she had asked for mine. With that aside, her attitude bothered me a little bit and I was disappointed that she had decided not to introduce herself to me. Although as a sports woman, I am used to dealing with difficult people… but she was an exception, she was Hikari's friend. The last thing I'd want to do is make an enemy of her.

I decided to continue the conversation; I knew that she was part of the school's choir herself so I asked: "Aren't you also part of the Saintly Chorus?" I didn't really mean anything by it.

She looked at me with cold eyes and answered a simple; "…Yes…"

It scared me a little to think that the way that she had said it felt almost dead. But I could feel her struggling with her emotions. I decided to drop the matter… Everyone wants to skip their duties once in a while. I'm no different sometimes.

"Are you interested in horseback riding?" I asked in an attempt to change the topic, maybe even offer her a ride. I thought to myself that maybe she just needed some cheering up. I thought that this was a good chance to look good in the eyes of Hikari's best friend, at least that's how I wished it to happen.

But she said to me; "No… Not at all…" Frankly, her cold voice shattered some of my hope in becoming her friend, but I could feel that she was hurting. And for some reason… I felt guilty. While looking into her amber eyes, I found it almost impossible to break eye contact. Honestly… I gave up, for now. As they say: You win some, you lose some. I know that all too well that I cannot please everyone.

"That's quite a shame." I said as I lowered my hat to cover my eyes and break eye contact. I bid her goodbye as I kept my head lowered, not daring to look at her eyes again unless I wanted to be entranced by it all over again. I ordered Star Bright to turn around and walk away.

I didn't know why, but looking at her made my heart beat faster. It was painful in a way, yet pleasant in another. Almost as pleasant as the way I feel when I look at Hikari, but the painful feeling I get every time I see or remember Nanto-san since then confuses me.

That was my memory of my first meeting her. It was so different from my first meeting with Hikari. The way she looked into my eyes with the cold, sad air around her haunted me that day… so much that I had wondered what I would do if I were to meet her again.

Unbeknownst to myself, I was about to get my chance. It was lunch time, and I had time to spare… or waste depending on how one would look at it. Though I could have probably used it for practice instead… but something, sometime before I even went to my horse told me that I should make good with what I had said to Hikari.

I was actually looking for Nanto-san just now, when I saw someone walking up to me. I smiled as I realized it was Hikari-chan.

"Hello Hikari." I greeted her. She looked flushed, but I'm quite sure it wasn't mostly because of her shyness.

"Amane-sempai, have you eaten lunch yet?" She asked while twiddling with her fingers.

"No I haven't. I was looking for Nanto-san." I watched her blue eyes open a bit in surprise.

"I told you I would try to talk to her, didn't I?" I said to remind her of my promise to her. She lightly gasped as she seemed to have remembered what I said last night. She then nodded and smiled.

"She's over there…" She turns and points to the direction she came from. And true enough I saw the raven haired girl standing there, writing something in her notebook.

I placed a hand on Hikari's shoulder, giving it a gentle and hopefully reassuring squeeze. "Wish me luck." She nodded and gave me a soft smile before I walked up to Nanto-san.

She was about to leave something on the table. I saw the name "Hikari" on the folded paper on her hand. _'A note perhaps?'_ that thought led me to believe that she was still avoiding Hikari, that or something else that didn't cross my mind till later... which was probably letting Hikari to be alone with me.

"Nanto-san." I called very politely, almost like she was someone's parent or guardian. I was surprised when she turned to me and flashed me a soft smile that I swear made my heart skip a few beats. I originally thought that she didn't like me based on our first meeting. She must have been having a bad day or maybe it was that time of the month for her, but whatever the reason I'm glad it's over. She then opens her notebook and begins to write something... It was then that I saw her expression change for a second and I immediately felt that she was about to attempt to avoid a conversation with me. I decided that I wouldn't wait for her to do so.

"Please follow me. I would like to talk to you." _'Perhaps that came out wrong…'_ I thought as I saw her smile almost fade from her face. I noticed her look far behind me. She seemed lost in thought for a moment that is, until I saw her smile a bit sourly and pocket the note she was intending to leave before I called her, she then waved to Hikari before following me.

A lot of our schoolmates were looking, but I paid it no mind… I was used to the attention and she probably was too. I led her outside the school. I wanted to bring her to the spot where we first met, by that memorable tree that she and Hikari seem to find rather comfortable leaning on. In a way, I wanted to erase the not so good memory of our first meeting… that is if this talk will be any better. I looked around and was glad to find no one else around, at least not that I could see. I wouldn't want a simple meeting to explode into a full scale gossip like last year.

"Sit down." I told her as I sat myself on the bench-like rock under the tree's shade. It suddenly occurred to me that the way I had said that didn't seem very polite or nice at all. I must be very nervous… I might be trying to scare her… even unconsciously, but I don't know why.

She took her time to stand and look around… needless to say, probably her way of rebelling against my commanding requests, before sitting down a good three feet away from me. I looked at her, but she didn't seem like she was going to look at me anytime soon. I am beginning to wonder why I wanted to talk to her again... other than it was for Hikari. Unfortunately the best reason that I could come up with was 'There's something about her…' what it was… is still very vague to me.

I just stared at her, examining her from head to toe. I noted that the smile she held while we were in the cafeteria was gone, replaced by a cold, sad, indifferent stare towards the sky. I found myself studying her features; her lustrous raven hair was slightly unkempt showing signs that she had barely been brushing it. Her mystifying amber eyes were surrounded by dark circles under her eye lids, an obvious sign of not sleeping enough or fatigue. Her cream colored skin seemed a little pale. Sakura pink lips that were a little dry and showed some signs of being chewed on. And a lovely figure, though I get this feeling that she's a little thinner than the last time I saw her.

If I had to describe the feeling she gives out, in a few words… I would say she's like a 'Fallen Angel'. An angel, who had committed a sin be it by her choice or otherwise, and was cast out of heaven.

To be quite honest, I'm actually afraid or perhaps nervous to speak to her right now. She's giving me this feeling that she could attack me at anytime. I almost deeply regret asking her to come and sit with me, or at least the way I did… had I not done that would she be reacting differently towards me? But then again, maybe I'm just scaring myself here. I mean this person is Hikari's friend… I can't imagine her having someone as scary as the person I'm imagining as her friend.

After a while, I began thinking that I was taking to long. She wasn't showing any signs that she was getting impatient… but then again she wasn't showing any signs at all.

So I forced myself to say something; "I know our first meeting…" However, I was so anxious that I couldn't finish that sentence, even though I thought the words seemed appropriate to start our conversation. I had expected her to at least look at me or just do something, but like moments ago she didn't show any signs of interest or disinterest in being here. She simply continued looking out towards the sky.

But then she opened her notebook. At first I thought she was going to write something to say to me like; _'What did you drag me here for?'_ or _'I should get going'_ or _'Bye'_. But to my surprise she began drawing. I slowly inched closer to her and watched her skillful hands draw the scene of the school's horse ranch. I found myself admiring her work and learning something about her. I was told that she was the choir's ace, but now I see that she has other talents… _'I wonder if Hikari knows that her best friend can draw this well.'_

"You're good at that." I complemented her absently, continuing to watch her hands gracefully dance on the notebook's printed paper.

She turned to look at me and gasped in surprise, dropping the notebook as her body suddenly jumped away from me. She had lost her balance and was falling to the ground. Thinking quickly, I caught her left wrist, but I only managed to lessen the impact of her fall.

Her eyes were closed as she tried to recover from the pain. I didn't know why but her pained expression made me feel warm inside, it was an odd feeling that I didn't understand, at least not then. I then noticed a wet feeling around my finger as I held her wrist, I almost cried out as I saw that my nail had dug and scratched her skin causing her to bleed.

"You're bleeding." I kneeled in front of her. I felt embarrassed somehow, like I was being watched. But there wasn't time for me to worry about that now. I kissed her wrist, suckled and licked the wound to get it clean. I had done this for myself and friends when we had to wait for the first aid kit; I had simply acted like I usually do in the given situation. But oddly enough, I felt very… happy to be touching her like this.

I was surprised when she suddenly pulled her hand away. I looked up at her, worried that she might have been in more pain. But instead I saw an angry look in her eyes that almost felt like she could burn me from the inside out. It took me a few seconds to notice the angry snarl and a deep blush that accented just how angry she was… it was then that a new concern came to me…

'_What if she hates me? No! I don't want her to hate me! ... Wait… why?' _

I told myself; _'__That was a stupid question… Hikari's best friend that's why!'_

'_Please don't hate me…'_

'_Was that all there was to it?'_ I asked myself, I felt more and more confused of how I thought of this girl.

And in the end… all I could say to myself was; _'I don't know…'_

'_But p__lease don't hate me…'_

Those thoughts alone passed thru my head quickly, I could feel my whole being begging her or God not to hate me as I stared into her eyes. I quickly decided that I had to apologize.

I offered my hand to help her stand up. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean…" but she just slapped my hand away, cutting off my attempt to apologize to her. To say that I was surprised was an understatement. I absently watched her stand up on her own, dust off her uniform of the soil and dirt that got on it, and pick up her notebook. She then looked at me… she just looked at me… staring straight into my eyes, like I did hers. Our eyes locked for only a few seconds, but it felt far longer than that. She then bowed; it was the smallest bow I've seen… I feared that it meant "goodbye!" I was correct in my fears.

To my surprise, she sharply turned around and began walking away. Each step she took made my chest feel heavier and tighter. It was incredibly painful, like… like… I don't really know what I could compare it with. I didn't know how or why. I have never met anyone that could make me feel this way. Not wanting it to end like that, I sprinted to catch up with her. When I did, I quickly placed my hand and held onto her shoulder, crying out; "Wait a minute!" almost begging her to stay.

She turns her head a little to the side and for a moment our eyes met again. The same angry glow of her face was still there. Looking away she immediately shrugs my hand off her and continues walking away.

"Please wait! Yaya-san." I desperately begged her to stop. I grabbed her wrist not really noticing that it was her injured one yet, or maybe I should say I had forgotten and didn't care. All that mattered at the moment was making her stay. I heard her notebook dully hit the grass on the ground, but the sound was enough to make me realize that she was shaking in pain.

To my horror she faced me again with that furious expression... I saw her lips move and say; "I… hate… you."

Those silent words had hurt me more than the stinging pain that came after when her right hand slapped me. I just stared at her. My lips trembled as I held my left cheek. I wanted to say something, but I couldn't find the words. I was completely stunned, and didn't have the faintest idea what to do.

I watched her turn around and head back to the school. I wanted to catch her again, to apologize or at least try, but my legs wouldn't obey me. All I could do was watch her as she slowly stomped her way back to the school while her blood occasionally tricked down from her hand.

I fell on my knees when she was out of sight. I was out of it for a while. My mind continuously replayed the moments when her lips moved to say those painful words… over and over. It was the second time that I've failed talking to her… and right now I felt like giving up.

After a few moments, I heard footsteps approach me. I looked up to see Fujino Shizuru, a classmate of mine, carrying a first aid kit. She looked at me with a mixture of worry and intrigue that she didn't hide in the slightest. Behind her stood Kuga Natsuki, an underclassman and a club mate.

'_I guess I was right about the feeling of being watched.'_ I said to myself.

Shizuru kneeled in front of me and checked my still very red cheek. "I'm happy to see that there are actually still some people immune to your charm, Amane-san." She teased. I didn't bother answering her. Although I know that she means well, she just likes to be very sarcastic about it.

"Who was that girl?" I heard Natsuki ask.

"Nanto Yaya." Shizuru answered for me. "I believe she's in the Saintly Chorus. I'm sure you've seen her a few times." She began wiping a strong but pleasant smelling and cold ointment on my stinging cheek.

"Yeah, but I don't usually bother getting their member's names." Natsuki began helping me up to my feet as soon as Shizuru had finished.

I then noticed the notebook that Nanto-san left. I picked it up and stared at it absently, while my mind seemed to automatically replay the events that had just transpired. I was probably looking for some absolution, that it wasn't me that caused her to angrily stomp away, but I couldn't find any.

"Was it that bad a rejection?" Shizuru asked, any other day her sarcasm wouldn't have much of an effect on me nor would I consider answering her seriously. But today, it did and I did.

"Maybe…" I mumbled softly causing Natsuki and Shizuru to look at me and then each other, seemingly confused about my reply.

I opened the notebook, wondering what was in it. I saw the many things that she had written; the greetings, apologies to Hikari, explanation of her absence, answers to teacher's question, and drawings… most of which were crude and childish drawings, possibly made just to waste time or to clear a train of thought. But some were exquisite sketches wasted on thin notebook paper. I had hoped that there was something that could explain her hostility against me. I was really dying to know and I couldn't simply let this go.

They lead me back to the horse barn. Inside there is a room with two beds, used by the ones who are on night duty for a few days.

"You should rest for a while." Shizuru said as she pushes me down to one of the beds.

"I'm fine." I argued. It was almost time for classes and even though I haven't eaten lunch yet we should be getting back.

"You're shaking you know." Had she not mentioned it, I wouldn't have noticed that I was. I looked down at my hands and legs, and true enough, I was shaking… very badly. "So just put your feet up a while and lie down, while we wait for Natsuki to buy you some Lunch."

I nodded in defeat. It's not so bad to skip classes once in a while, and I definitely don't want anyone to see this slap mark. I'm sure that everyone will make a big deal out of it. "Can you guys keep what happened a while ago a secret?"

Shizuru raised an eyebrow and looked at me inquisitively. "I guess so. But… why?"

A frowning smile crept up my lips. "I don't want to bring her anymore trouble, I think she's got enough problems already." I told them. It was true that I didn't want to bring her more trouble, and despite all that had happened I still want to get to know her and maybe help her, like I did for Hikari.

I lost myself in thought for a while.

"Hmmm…"

I thought that I had been staring out at nowhere, but when I broke out of my thoughts… I realized that Shizuru's face was just inches away from mine own and her eyes stared deeply into mine.

"What is it…?" I asked, hoping that it would get her to stop staring at me.

She then asked, in a rather cold voice. "Are you serious about her?"

"Huh?" was the only response that came out, aside for the feeling of my cheeks heating up. I was surprised at her question and didn't quite know how to respond. There was just something about Nanto-san that made me feel odd. I can't really explain it. For now the best that I could probably describe it, is that I'm longing to see her, touch her... I'm also a bit scared of her, and terrified that she'll hate me even more.

"Hmm…" she suddenly smiled. I hate it when she does that, it's quite creepy. "What about Konohana-san?"

I could feel that she was trying to get at something, but she tends to be vague about things she wants to say, not to mention sarcastic about it.

"What are you getting at?" I asked her with an annoyed tone. I wish she would just come right out and say it at times. 'Why does she take so much pleasure in toying with other people's heads?'

"I'm just saying… to choose the right one. You don't want to hurt either one right?" She gave me a reassuring smile then patted my hand.

I wanted to tell her that it wasn't like that… but knowing her she'll find a way to say that it is. Twisting my words enough to make even myself believe that it were true. So I decided to simply smile and nod to satisfy her.

Natsuki then came back with some sandwiches and a can of juice. I thanked her and Shizuru for all they did for me. They left for class after that, leaving me alone in the Horse Barn's sleeping quarters with my thoughts.

I pondered about Nanto-san a little more while I ate. I recalled that Hikari did not really talk about Nanto-san all that much until she lost her voice. The only information I knew is that they're best friends, that Nanto-san looks out for and supports her, and that she's the choir's ace. Other than I know she can draw very well, I knew nothing about her… What does she like? What's her real personality like? How did she act around Hikari before she lost her voice? I could go on forever…

I woke up… realizing that I had drifted off to sleep, maybe it's from thinking too much.

Classes should over by now, I felt a little bad for skipping, but then again, I felt refreshed after that unplanned nap. So I guess it was ok. I checked my face in the mirror and was glad that most of the redness in my cheek had disappeared.

Just then Natsuki re-entered the room, wearing her horse riding uniform and carrying my bag. "I brought your things. How is your cheek?" She didn't really sound all that concerned, but that was simply how Natsuki was: blunt, rude, but nice.

"It's better now. Thank you." She just nodded and placed the bag on the bed. She left the room soon after saying that she would ride Duran, her horse, again. I followed her out shortly, saddled Star Bright and rode out to practice.

It was peaceful for a while; we were able to ride without the countless squealing fans, which did not last long. Before I realized it there were a lot of our schoolmates watching us. I tried my best to ignore them, which was hard since I was also looking for Hikari among the crowd.

Practice ended without me seeing her. I rushed out of the stables to look for Hikari soon after feeding Star Bright, but she wasn't anywhere to be found. A flood of terrible thoughts rushed into my head, as I sat on the rock bench under the tree. Like _'If Nanto-san told her what I did.' _or_ 'If Nanto-san was angry enough to slander me.' _or_ 'What if that cut I accidentally gave her was worse than it looked?...'_

I would have gone on and on… but then I heard footsteps behind me.

"Amane-sempai." I heard the angel's call, rescuing me from my terrible thoughts. I turned to see Hikari, with a sad smile on her face. And for a moment… I forgot what I had been worrying about.

**To be continued…**

_**PLEASE REVIEW!!!**_

**Author's Notes**: Yes! Fujino Shizuru and Kuga Natsuki from Mai-Hime! Hehe ;; I originally thought to just make names up… but having characters from other Animes making a Cameo seemed much more fun! XD

Anyway this chapter has been revised, to make Amane's feelings a little more clear yet blurred… wait that didn't seem to make sense. Oh well XD Anyway it's slightly longer I guess, but just by a few hundred words nothing much. Over all nothing that would affect the future chapters have changed.

Please Review!


	5. Chapter III : Tsubomi

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes:

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

Please Review!

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 3: Tsubomi: What's wrong with you?!**

I had chosen to wear my orange sundress today, since I rarely get the chance to wear it. I had brushed my hair and checked my appearance on my mirror about five times over, and I was glad to see that the yellow sandals and yellow purse I went well with my dress. Not that I'm trying to impress anyone but a girl has got to look her best after all. I left my room soon after, hoping to see Yaya-sempai waiting for me outside… but sadly it seemed that she's running late.

'_How rude… she asked me out of a date. She should have been early!'_ I cursed inwardly but immediately shrugged it off. I stood by outside the dorm's entrance and enjoyed the morning breeze. I found myself thinking and recalling the events that lead me here…

Yesterday… Yaya-sempai asked me to go out with her today. I thought that maybe Yaya-sempai was jealous of Hikari-sempai? You can really blame me or the rumors, I know that Hikari-sempai is going out with Ootori-sama. And although Yaya-sempai is always encouraging Hikari-sempai I wonder if Yaya-sempai also likes Ootori-sama. And there was also that rumor that Yaya was turned down by Ootori-sama after they had walked out of the cafeteria yesterday. I wonder if any of it was true… As I waited for Yaya-sempai at the front gates of the dorm, I began to recall what I've observed of her for the past few days.

Yaya-sempai would be nowhere insight. I know all to well that Hikari-sempai was worried. Not that I was worried about her or Yaya-sempai, but she was the choir's ace after all so she should really show more dedication else a lot of the junior choir members might catch her bad habit. Hikari-sempai told me that she hadn't seen Yaya-sempai for days. I had been wondering what had happened between them again… Come to think of it, they never did tell anyone what happened between them the first time.

The day before yesterday, Hikari-sempai told me that Yaya-chan was back but unfortunately had lost her voice. I guess that could explain why she was missing. But still she could have just told us, we would have understood. But I guess that Yaya-sempai is just like that. Not that I know her very well!... We're not exactly close or anything, we're just in the same club that's all!

I've decided to give her a piece of my mind as soon as I find her… Which I unfortunately I had to cancel, seeing that she was following Ootori-sama out of the cafeteria. There were a lot of talks about the first years about it. Mostly speculative talks and made up rumors about Yaya-sempai's long absence. Some of which are a little too lewd and embarrassing to repeat. A lot of students tried to follow them, probably to confirm any of the rumors.

At our practice yesterday, Hikari-sempai had mentioned that Yaya-sempai didn't return to class after lunch break. Luckily our leader wasn't feeling well and decided to call of the practice. Hikari-sempai decided to look for Yaya-sempai or Ootori-sama to ask either about their talk. I had decided to go back to the dorms after I grab some juice at the cafeteria. I would never have guessed who I'd run into there…

I was snapped back into reality when I felt someone blowing air on my neck…

"**IYAAAAAAAAA!!!"** I jumped and screamed loudly then turned almost to attack whoever it was that did it. I wasn't surprised to say the least to learn that it was Yaya-sempai, laughing quite heartily even though all you hear was the sound of her breathing or should I say the sound of her trying to breathe. _'Speak of the devil…'_

"**Yaya-sempai!** Why did you do that?!" I asked rather angrily. Though that made my heart skip a beat and seeing her in her bold casual clothes; which consisted of a loose red top a white vest, a black belt bag that she hung loosely on her waist, a tight fitting blue denim shorts, a pair of red sneakers and a red baseball hat with her long black hair tied into a pony tail hanging out of the hat's back hole. I found her pretty dressed like that. But… I'd never admit that to her.

She slowly recovered from her laughing fit and wrote on her notebook_: 'Because without my voice, I have to find more creative ways to tease you.'_ She giggled as she showed it to me.

"You should grow up and not do it at all. Besides I'm already coming with you as a favor." I lectured her like I usually do, even though Yaya-sempai doesn't really listen to me. I looked at her and was surprised to see a soft smile on her face.

'_You're right. I apologize. I won't do it anymore.'_ She wrote and showed me. Who would have thought that Yaya-sempai could be reasonable… but then again… The Yaya-sempai I know is a trickster and a tease, she could be planning something, I should probably be more careful.

"Anyway… where are we going?" I picked up my purse, which I had accidentally dropped when she blew air on my neck.

Yaya-sempai just nodded and opened her notebook which revealed a note that said that she had a 10 a.m. appointment with a doctor at one of the city's hospital.

"**Eh?!** Why didn't you ask Hikari-sempai then? I mean she's worried about you! You know!"

But she just smiled and flipped a few pages. _'That's exactly why I asked you instead. I know she'll get even more worried about me if she knows what's wrong.' _

Her response surprised me, I mean how did she know that I was going to ask her that? But then I just thought of it as one of Yaya-sempai's qualities as a friend. Not counting the days she was avoiding everyone of course. That was very thoughtless of her.

"But still she's your best friend isn't she? I'm sure she'd want to know." I argued. "I mean we could probably ask her to come with us."

But then sempai frowned, and wrote_; 'She's going out with Ootori-sama today. I'd really not want to ruin their plans.'_ I didn't have any response for that one. Just a sad and disappointed nod as we walked towards the nearest train station. She walked quietly beside me almost tripping and bumping her head on a few lamp posts.

About an hour later, we arrived at the Hospital. Though it was a wonder how we got there in time and in one piece seeing that Yaya-sempai was behaving very oddly the whole way here. If anything, I feel like the reason she asked me to come is to snap her out of the daze she's in every now and again. I almost lost her at the train a while ago. I had to put my arm around hers just so that I don't loose her before we got here.

She didn't have to wait long for the doctor to see her. The nurse asked me to wait in the lobby. But Yaya-sempai looked a little uneasy when I let go of her arm. Not that I blame her… Not after how I saw her yesterday…

I found Yaya-sempai was sulking on one of the cafeteria's corner tables. It was one of the tables that were almost hidden from view, covered by some indoor plants and big soft sofa like diner bench chairs. I approached her fully intent on lecturing her to shape up. But as I got closer, I noticed that her left wrist was wrapped in a slightly blood soaked bandage. Her eyes were closed, I had almost thought that she had fainted and needed medical assistance. But as I got closer, her eyes flew open and looked at me. I felt a bit angry, but I didn't really know why and I think that I didn't hide it the least. But to my surprise she didn't look like she was the least bit worried or threatened by my presence, this is so unlike her. Instead she smiled as she flipped her notebook open and wrote:

'_Tsubomi-chan, are you doing anything tomorrow?'_ I read the note, and more or less confirmed that Yaya-sempai really did loose her voice. But I had to be sure, so I thought I'd do something that would make her talk.

She just watched me with a curious gaze as I sat beside her. I looked at her straight in the eye. She looked nervous by my standards and was about to write something again when… I placed my hands on her sides and began tickling her. She gasped and laughed, twitching and struggled to break free from my hold. I kept it up for a nearly a minute, but she didn't let out a sound other than the sound of her breathing. When she had recovered from laughing she then wrote: _'what the hell was that for?!'_

"**Hahaha**… I'm sorry Yaya-sempai. I just wanted to confirm if it was true that you lost your voice." I apologized but couldn't hold my laughter. She just looked at me and sighed before leaning on the table all depressed. I guess I went a little too far.

She closed her eyes for a while. I had a chance to take a good look at her. She looked a little skinnier than I could remember; I wonder if she had been skipping meals as well. Her uniform seemed dirty, like she had fallen on her back. And lastly the bloodied bandaged… I had wondered where or how she got that injury. Don't tell me she almost committed … _'suicide?'_

"Yaya-sempai! You didn't?!" grabbed her hand pointing at the injury. But she just looked at me with an almost lifeless stare, before flipping her notebook open and wrote: _'Didn't what?'_

I initially thought that she was playing dumb, like she usually does. I acted on instinct and said "You didn't try to commit suicide didn't you?" I had almost yelled that out. But it was a good thing that not many students were in the cafeteria.

Her eyes just looked at me and blinked in confusion. For a moment I noticed her eyes fall on her bandaged wrist, her eyes widened a little seemingly realizing what I mean. She then opened her notebook and wrote; _'I got scratched running away from Ootori…'_ I found it odd why Yaya-sempai called Ootori-sama… Ootori. She used to call her Amane, without any honorific… Like a close friend… or rival.

I read on as she continued trying to hold my tongue long enough for her to write down what she wants to. _'…but that seems like a good idea right now…'_ I cringed at that, I felt angrily... but I didn't know to whom I was angry… Yaya-sempai wasn't like herself. I was about to yell when I saw her hands move continuing to write. _'… would anyone miss me? When I'm gone?'_ I was shocked to say anything.

Why is she so depressed? Is it so bad that she wants to die? Who else is involved? I bet each of these questions will only raise more questions after them. And as I looked at her it didn't seem like the right time to ask.

I composed myself and tried to not look too concerned. "I'm not doing anything tomorrow. What did you have in mind?" I tried not to look at her, I turned my attention to check if there were eavesdroppers listening in our conversation. Thankfully there were none. Coz I screamed when I saw…

'_Let's go on a date!'_ was her readied response. The page had drawings of characters that I assumed to be of me and her walking hand in hand shaded and colored with different colored pens emphasizing her words even more. She was smiling quite widely. But it looked like it was forced to me. But I dared not bring it up. After I recovered from the shock, I agreed… slightly reluctant and maybe even a little regretful.

Yaya-sempai is a really difficult person to understand… One moment you're so concerned that she's depressed, next thing you know she's asking you out on a date. I mean, Yaya-sempai is cool and talented and all that… She's quite a beauty as well, though Hikari-sempai is much more cute and responsible. I mean… I don't know anymore… maybe I'm kind of disappointed that this was just a hospital trip.

My thoughts were thankfully interrupted when Yaya-sempai took my hand and urged me to follow her. I had my doubts about this, I offered that she should go in alone, after all she deserves the right to keep whatever it is she has secret from everyone if she wants. But had it been any other day I think Yaya-chan wouldn't even ask me to be here with here. She writes in her notebook; _'I'm a bit afraid th...' _

I can't help but feel a little touched. _'Does she trust me that much?... at least enough to tell me that she's afraid of something.'_ I thought. I mean who would have guessed that Yaya-sempai who's only close friend is Hikari-sempai would ask me instead of her best friend. I didn't wait for her to finish, she had lowered herself enough right? I closed the notebook and smiled. "Let's go." I said as I took her hand.

Yaya-sempai looked at me with a confused sad gaze for a few seconds. Her lips move and I could tell that she said; my name… and thank you, for some reason before letting out a genuine soft smile and nods.

We entered the room where the doctor was waiting for Yaya-sempai. I apologized for the both of us for taking up her time. But the doctor seemed nice enough and said that she didn't mind. She then asked us to sit down before she began telling us the news of Yaya-sempai's condition. Sempai was shaking; I could see and feel her shaking. I placed a hand on hers which clutched the ends of her denim shorts and held her hand tight. I could see a tiny smile crept up her lip when I did. Which made me feel… happy.

"Nanto, Yaya-san all the tests say…" The doctor paused and looked at the report sheets about twice over. Sempai had her eyes closed; I could only guess what was on her mind.

"…that your throat is fine." She finished. The doctor sounded rather confused and surprised.

Without thinking I reacted… "**How could that be**?!" I stood from my seat and yelled at the doctor. **"If her throat is fine then why can't she speak!?"**

The room went silent for a while. The doctor pondered a bit. I turned to look at sempai. She looked disappointed but not as shocked as I was, probably almost expecting the results but hoping something else was wrong.

"My personal opinion would be that she had suffered some kind of mental or emotional trauma that had led her to subconsciously desire not to talk anymore… But that's only my opinion. I have to be honest I'm as shocked as you are miss." She addressed me, rather professionally. I fell back onto my seat after. I felt loss and sorry for Yaya-sempai.

"I can recommend a psychiatrist if you want." I turned to Yaya, and saw her shaking her head.

"Why not sempai?" I was curious as to why she didn't want see one.

She slowly opens her notebook, with the same lost, depressed look in her eyes. But instead the doctor answered. "Well I can understand… Psychiatrists are quite expensive. And it's not even sure if they can really help you." I doubted her words, I know what she said was by fact true… but I doubt that Yaya-sempai didn't want to see a Psychiatrist for a different reason. And at that point I just didn't want to press her anything against her will.

"I see…" At that point there was nothing left to do but thank the doctor for her time, pay the doctor's fee and leave the hospital.

We were on our way to the train station when, Yaya-sempai suddenly lets go of my hand.

"Yaya-sempai, you'll get lost if you don't hold on to me!" I playfully lectured her, trying to sound as much as I normally do.

She looks at me and smiles. She flips thru the pages of her book searching for a page, when she finds it she holds onto my hand again and show's me the colorful page yesterday. It says: '_Let's go on a date!'_ once again… I am shocked. I looked at her questioningly.

She looked serious, her amber eyes looked sad but I could tell that she wanted to cheer up somehow. She looked almost pleading like a little puppy, I didn't really have to think about it to long.

I smiled and took her hand again. "Let's go then!"

I was more than happy to see Yaya-sempai beamed at my response.

We enjoyed a slow stroll around the entertainment streets of the city, Yaya-sempai would occasionally pull me into random shops every now and again.

One such shop was frilly dress shop where I had the displeasure of being sempai's dress up doll. She had forced me into a few sundresses, one of which was a pink one laced with a few red frills around the neck, shoulders and skirt ends. Yaya-sempai forbade me to look in the mirror while she inspected me in the pink and red dress.

"Yaya-sempai…" I sounded almost begging to get out of here. I was very embarrassed I know that people do these things on dates but… I mean… sempai and I aren't like that. I then saw Sempai's look brighten like she had gotten an idea, she walks a way for a bit and looks for something. I was very tempted to look in the mirror behind me but I felt like she was going to look back at anytime and didn't dare. She returns with a small red purse and a red lacy ribbon on her hands and tied it on my hair. She looks at me and straightens up the dress. I noticed that she was smiling almost like she had forgotten her troubles. I have to say that her smile is infectious and I couldn't help but smile myself.

She then motions for me to look at the mirror; I noted that she was about write something. I turned and looked at myself and almost didn't recognize me. "Is that me?" I asked rather dumbfounded. I don't mean to brag but I know that I'm pretty… but wow… I… I'm…

'_You're cute!'_ was what she wrote…

"Just cute?" I asked without masking the disappointment in my voice.

But she just shook her head and tapped the note again, with a big smile on her face. That's when I realized that "cute" was Yaya-sempai's complement to beauty. I blushed as I recall Yaya-sempai always teasing Hikari-sempai about being cute in anything… _'I wonder if I can ever be that cute.'_

I then watched her pick up the clothes that I was wearing in here before she walked to the cashier and write something on her notebook. The lady nods with a smile after seeing the note. I walked up to sempai wondering what it was that she told her.

"Yaya-sempai. What did you… tell… her?" I was shocked to see that she was holding a credit card with the note.

With a smile she showed me the note that said: _'My friend will be wearing the dress on the way out.' _

"You're buying this dress?!!" I yelled, and managed to embarrass myself to a few customers. But Yaya-sempai just waved at them to mind their own businesses.

She nods and writes: _'Because you're so cute in that!'_ I blushed brightly as soon as I saw the words you and cute.

I began wondering if Yaya-sempai was… _'No way! That couldn't be true… right?! I'm sure that she's just trying to repay me for accompanying her to the doctor… Yeah that's it… haha…'_ I somehow managed to disappoint myself. I didn't notice the cashier walk up behind me and take off the price clips that made sure the item can't be stolen. I watch as Yaya-sempai pay for my new dress. It must have cost her quite a lot. I heard that her family is rich and all but…

She walks up to me, carrying the shop's bag where my clothes and bag are now in. I was about to take them but she surprised me by taking my arm and escorting me out of the shop. We began walking around again… I felt a little embarrassed to be wearing this out here, and even more embarrassed that Yaya-sempai was walking around holding onto me like we were… lovers.

She leads me into a nice café. I was about to seat opposite of her but I saw her pointing on the seat beside her. And for some reason… I found myself sitting beside her, finding it almost impossible to say no to her. She held an arm around my waist bringing me closer to her seat and that was when the waitress decided to come over. She was blushing and looked almost envious, when she noticed Yaya-sempai's arm was around me. "Welcome to Linden Baum. My name is Mai and I'll be you're waitress for today. Are you ready to order?" she asked trying to sound very polite and cheerful, despite the awkward situation.

I ordered a sandwich and a strawberry float while sempai pointed at pasta dish and a mango parfait. The blushing waitress quickly went away to get our orders. I turned to Yaya-sempai, and she had her eyes closed while resting her head on my shoulder.

"Yaya-sempai?..." I shook her a little but I soon realized that she had fallen asleep on my shoulder.

'_That was fast…'_ I thought about waking her, but quickly decided that it was ok. I mean, she's been thru a lot… even though I don't know what had happened to her I felt that she's trying to deal with it on her own. I kind of had a new found respect for Yaya-sempai. I allowed her to take a short nap while we wait for the food to be served.

As I was watching Sempai's sleeping face, I couldn't help but blush at the thoughts that crossed my mind. I had almost slapped myself just to regain composure. But just as I thought I was getting used to this… Yaya-sempai suddenly shifted and her head fell and laid on my lap. I swear I thought I was going to scream when I felt her hair tickle my legs. But that wasn't my only problem; some of the other customers were beginning to stare at me. _'This is so embarrassing…'_

And just for a second I thought I heard Hikari-sempai calling Yaya-sempai. I looked around, but didn't see her so I had assumed that my mind was playing tricks on me… Maybe the food was taking too long.

Minutes later the waitress returned with our order, blushing even harder after seeing where Sempai's head was now. She quickly but carefully placing our orders in front of us and said to me: "Please take your time and call me if you need anything else."

'_The "take your time" sounded malicious to me…'_ I thought. I pinched myself hoping that this was a big embarrassing dream. _'… Guess it's not.'_

She winked and quickly made her way to another table to attend to other customers. Having her leave made me a bit relieved somehow. I shook sempai's shoulder trying to wake her up. "Sempai. Sempai!"

Her eyes slowly opened and she looked at me, still lying on my lap. 'Tsu-bo-mi' I saw her spell my name with her lips. I just smiled.

"The food is here sempai. Let's eat." She nodded and yawn before trying to get off my lap.

"Itadakimasu!" I said as I clasped my hands together before I began eating.

In the middle of the meal, sempai suddenly took one of my sandwiches and ate it. "Ah! Sempai! That was mean."

She just smiled and rolled some of her pasta onto her fork and held it out for me to eat. _'She's… She's… She's going to feed me!'_

She open's her mouth; I could almost hear her pronouncing "Aaaaah……" for me, making me open my mouth.

I was embarrassed, but I kind of liked it somehow. I could feel my heart beating faster. I opened my mouth and allowed the food's entry. The tasty white sauce, mixed with some cheese and bits fish filled my mouth tingling my taste buds. I was better than the sandwich I ordered.

"That was delicious!" I told her. She smiled and offered me another fork roll of pasta. We shared the rest of our meal. It was embarrassing for me, but for some reason Yaya-sempai didn't seem the least bit embarrassed.

Sempai paid using her credit card for both our meals, I tried to pay my share but she had hidden my wallet. I'm guessing she did it while I was changing into this pink dress. I felt angry at her for doing so, but I also felt flattered that she bothered doing so just to make sure she would be paying for both of us.

We then continued our stroll around town. Yaya-sempai insisted that we watch a movie. I agreed not knowing that she had chosen a horror move until we were inside. I was screaming and holding onto her the whole movie… I'm sure she chose a scary movie on purpose... After that she dragged me into a game center saying that it could help make me forget about the horror movie. We played a few games, most of which I lost against her. But only because I wasn't fully comfortable with what I was wearing, at least not yet.

When she got tired of wining, we continued exploring for more shops. I found myself being dragged into a art supply shop. Where I found myself watching the owner carve something out of a piece of wood while I waited for Sempai to get what she wanted. I was surprised to see her bring a sketchpad, a box of colored pencils, a big box of expensive oil paint a few different brushes, an easel and a few ready canvases. The owner stopped his carving and proceeded to calculate the total amount of her purchase.

"Sempai… isn't that a little too much?" I asked rather surprised with the sheer amount of items she decided to buy. "How are we going to carry all this?"

"Don't worry little miss. We can deliver it to you later for a little fee." The owner smiled, seemingly happy to see that Yaya-sempai was quite a buyer. "You can also call us if you ever need more supplies." He hand's Yaya-sempai a business card.

Sempai just nods and happily pays for all the items. The owner then takes our dorm's address and sempai's contact details just incase. He then packs them and sets them aside. "I'll have them sent as soon as one of my delivery men gets back from the last order."

I thanked him for Yaya-sempai, before being unnecessarily dragged out of the shop with her arm wrapped around mine. We ended up in a instrument shop where Yaya-sempai astonished me by playing "Cannon" on a violin. I swear my jaw dropped so low I thought I dislocated it. When she ended there was a big applause from all the customers. Yaya-sempai bowed gracefully, and replaced the instrument on it's stand.

"Sempai… where did you learn that?" I had to ask. She wrote that she had violin and piano lessons, before she transferred to Spica. _'She plays the Piano too?!' _I felt faint… Yaya-sempai's talents are just too much. How can one person have so many talents but not have any dedication to them… _'It's so unfair…'_

After the instrument shop, we started heading back to the train station. We stopped only for some iced tea to refresh ourselves before slightly long train ride back to Astrea Hill. The train was almost empty when we rode. I swore I saw a few Spica students from Yaya-sempai's year level. They glanced at us just when Yaya-sempai decided to use my lap as a pillow again. I was blushing yet again. I kept my head down trying not to make eye contact with the few people that were there.

The train arrived at Astrea Hill. I was more that glad Yaya-sempai woke up before anyone had the chance to actually see her lie on me up close. We allowed everyone else to disembark first, knowing that the train won't be leaving soon.

Yaya then tapped my shoulder and showed me a note: _'I had a good time!'_

"M… m… me too…" I had trouble saying it… but I'm glad I did. She smiled and offered me her arm. I blushed as I took it and allowed her to lead me out of the train.

We were silent as we walked towards the dorm. Or maybe I should say I was silent, Yaya-sempai really had no choice in the matter. That twenty minute walk to the dorms seemed like seconds for once. We reached the dorm's entrance and I was disappointed that my day with her has to end already. I had unconsciously stared at sempai the whole way, if she noticed she either didn't mind or she didn't care… or so I thought.

She grinned as she wrote: _'Let's do this again sometime!'_

I blushed and nodded.

With both hands she gently cupped the sides of my face, and then the next thing that happened surprised me more than anything that happened today…

… **to be continued.**

**Author's Notes:** Yep Mai Tokiha makes her cameo from Mai-Hime again. and know that the café is the name of the café she works in, at least in the anime. I had trouble with writing this XD I felt lazy for a while. And to those wondering if Yaya is that talented. ;; I don't really know. But I'd like to think she is.

Thanks for the comments everyone. I wish for your future support. **_Please Review!_**

**Now for an Omake!:**

Yaya: Eh?! There were rumors!?!

Tsubomi: Yeah! A whole lot of them!

Yaya: Like what?

Tsubomi: there's this one where given a 2 week suspension for breaking some rule. Which a lot of us found probable knowing you…

Yaya: Shut up… what else?

Tsubomi: there was also one where, you ran away and eloped with someone…

Yaya: Unlikely… anything else?

Tsubomi: well there was where Ootori-sama had been keeping you in her room as her love slave, which could explain why no one could find you for the last few days… But this one was fairly new, and sprang up only after they saw you following Ootori-sama

Yaya: (gasps, eyes wide opened.) …WAAA?!! … Girls these days are such perverts…

Tsubomi: you just insulted the both of us as well. Yaya-sempai…

Yaya: (sweat drops) …

Amane: That last one sounded interesting…

Yaya: (gulp)

Hikari: (gasp blush)

Tsubomi: (gasp)

Amane: (grin)

**Omake End**


	6. Chapter IV : Hikari

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes:

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

Please Review!

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 4: Hikari: Would you smile again?**

"Amane-sempai." I called to her, but my thoughts where with someone else. Yaya-chan didn't come back to class after lunch. I had began to worry since the first period after lunch ended. I wonder what had happened…

"Hikari."

Sempai looked worried. I moved closer and sat beside her. My legs hurt, all the running around I've been doing to look for Yaya-chan lately seemed to be taking it's toll on me. It was lucky that our leader decided to postpone our practice today, I thought maybe I could find Yaya-chan this time… considering she doesn't know choir practice is canceled. But I guess I was wrong and how could I forget, Yaya-chan doesn't have a place in the choir for now. We were quiet for a while, I could only guess what was on her mind… or should I say who.

"Sempai? Yaya-chan didn't go back to class a while ago. Did something happen?" I could not hide the worry in my voice. I felt like a bad friend. Yaya-chan could always find me when I'm troubled, why can't I be like that? Why can't I ever find her?

"I'm sorry, Hikari." I softly gasped at the apology. "I screwed up a bit… I was so nervous we barely got to talk at all. And then I accidentally hurt Nanto-san."

'_Hurt?!'_ the word and all its meanings streamed into my mind. I grew more worried about Yaya-chan with each passing second. I wanted to run and look for her again, but I felt I should let Amane-sempai tell me all the details first. "Yaya-chan is hurt?"

Sempai nodded and explained what happened. She told me that she was having trouble starting the conversation with Yaya-chan, mentioning how intimidated she was of her, something I found hard to believe, Yaya-chan was the type that could get along with almost anyone… or is that only how I see her? She continued that something happened and she had unexpectedly surprised Yaya-chan by accident and which resulted on the cut on her wrist. She tried to apologize but Yaya-chan left her as soon as she could, she also said that she felt that she shouldn't follow.

"I see…" was all that I could say. I wonder why Yaya-chan is like this. Come to think of it… Yaya-chan didn't seem to like Amane-sempai very much, which was weird since she had always been cheering for me telling me not to give up on my feelings for her. Or could it be?... maybe?… does Yaya-chan like Amane-sempai too?... If she does why doesn't she… Awww… I just managed to confuse myself.

Amane-sempai asked about Yaya-chan, what she liked, what she was like, what she didn't like… which made me realize all the more… how little I knew about Yaya-chan, where as she seemed to know almost everything about me. Sure I knew small things, simple things… but the deeper stuff that makes her act the way she does, the smiles that shine so brightly even when she doesn't mean it, what made her start singing, why was she always helping me?…

I had not realized I was lost in my thoughts, Amane-sempai didn't bother to shake me from them at the moment. And until we realized that it was nearing sunset and our curfew that we even showed signs of knowing that the other was beside the other.

We returned to the dormitory separately… actually I don't recall when I started to or when we separated. I recall sighing very deeply just as I reached our dorm room though…

I entered our room to find Yaya-chan sleeping in dusk light lit room. She laid to her side facing my side of the wall, though I could tell that she had originally been facing the other way from how her blanket was ruffled and the fresh tear stains on the other side of her pillow.

'_Wait a minute?!... tears?...'_

Yaya-chan… was crying again… and was still crying as she slept. I swear I could hear her soft sobs in my heart, stabbing me like hot needles. May be it was the pain of the wound this time… but if that reason justifies these tears, what reason did she have for crying last time… Would she tell me if I asked?

I saw the bandaged wrist, it was slightly blood stained which scared me a little. I noticed that her notebook was open. I picked it up to find a note for me;

"_Hikari, sorry if you were looking for me. I had an accident and cut my wrist. I lost a bit a blood before I could get first aid, I'm feeling slightly dizzy but the nurse said I'll be fine. I had an early dinner and some medicine to numb the pain. I had asked Tsubomi-chan to fetch my bag if you haven't already brought it with you… and an early goodnight to you. - Yaya "_

It's was a start, at least she left a message this time unlike this morning and afternoon. I want to do something for her. I owe her a lot, too much actually… I am not even sure if I had been of any help to her. She might have even sacrificed her love for me…

I found myself sitting on the side of her bed, daring myself to touch her hand or brush her hair… neither felt easy right now. I continued to watch her sad sleeping face, as her tears continued to slowly flow like a gentle river. I felt so pathetic and felt like crying myself.

"What can I do to stop you tears from flowing… Yaya-chan…?"

The next day was… interesting... It was the only word I could describe it with. I learned that Yaya-chan had plans today and even left earlier than me and Amane-sempai. I had actually planned to invite her along. After all I had heard that they weren't able to talk, since something happened and Yaya-chan got a cut on her wrist... I thought of trying to get them to talk. It was something I thought of over dinner that night, after seeing Yaya-chan on her bed yesterday evening. They are after all the two most important people to me. I wanted us to be close. At first I thought that there would be another chance… Yaya-chan had always thought me to be positive about things. I thought that it will work out somehow and decided to just enjoy my date with Amane-sempai today.

Sempai came at my door an hour after Yaya-chan had left. She was wearing a blue long sleeve shirt, white slacks and blue sneakers. 'She dresses like a guy.' I thought, but then again that was Amane-sempai's charm. I blushed most of the time, realizing that I had chosen that day of all days to wear the same colored sundress and hat of all days. _'We looked like a pair… what will people think?'_

Amane-sempai on the other hand didn't seem to mind it in the least. She was smiling quite lively this morning… _'Maybe she had a good start this morning.'_ I thought as I observed her. I couldn't help but be cheered up after seeing her reassuringly happy smile. We talked a lot on the train, random things… some were things you say and ask when you're trying to find things to say and ask. I felt quite silly for a while actually.

Later in the city, I was at a lost at what to do. I guess being stuck inside an all girl's school, dorm and campus for so long takes some of you're common sense a way. I had almost forgotten that there males in the world. Amane-sempai then took my hand and lead the way. We walked around the city for a while, enjoying the sights, the local treats, peaking inside shops and restaurants. It almost felt like it was a school fair.

Lunch time came. Sempai had suggested we eat lunch first before we continue wandering around. I chose a café called Linden Baum. It was close to where we had coincidentally wandered and the atmosphere inside seems nice. We walked in and took our seats. As I was admiring the tables and the cute uniforms for the waitresses, I noticed that Amane-sempai was looking somewhere else.

"Sempai? Is everything ok?"

She didn't turn her head to look at me but answered: "Isn't that Nanto-san?..."

"Eh?" I was surprised that Yaya-chan was here. She did say that she had plans. But she didn't say where… did she? I turned to the direction where Amane-sempai was looking and felt something squeeze my heart at the sight of my best friend lying her head on Tsubomi-chan's shoulder. I felt envious. Thinking that I would like to lie on Amane-sempai's shoulder too…

I stole a glance at Amane-sempai, she looked… out of it. She had this blank stare that held directly at Yaya-chan. I wonder if asking her to talk to Yaya-chan wasn't such a good idea after all. I looked at Yaya-chan's direction again and saw her head fall from Tsubomi-chan's shoulder and on to her lap.

"**YAYA-CHAN!"** I couldn't hold the urge to yell her name from where I sat. But I immediately regretted that, and tried to hide behind our menus.

I took a peak and was glad that Tsubomi-chan didn't see us. It's awkward enough. I looked at sempai and noticed that she was looking at me while covering herself with her menu. She smiled at me, almost trying to hold a laugh in. I found myself smiling, somehow the slip up made the mood lighter.

The waitress then came back to take our order, we had ordered something simple and easy to eat as well as share. I didn't know why but it seemed like Amane-sempai and I were planning on watching the two. We talked and ate as we watched them, eat and be something like a sweet couple. Yaya-chan had been feeding herself and Tsubomi-chan with the same fork, which made me blush jealously when I heard Amane-sempai mutter the words 'Indirect Kisses'. They seem to be having a lot of fun together, I was rather surprised to see Tsubomi-chan smiling at Yaya-chan, and she usually had this big frown or pout whenever they were in close proximity.

Maybe… Just maybe… It wasn't Amane-sempai that Yaya-chan liked, it was Tsubomi-chan… hmmm… but why am I wishing that it wasn't Tsubomi-chan either? They look good together and Yaya-chan is smiling… Shouldn't I be happy for her?

I inwardly sighed at my internal conflicts… why am I like this? I'm finally alone with Amane-sempai and all I could do is think about Yaya-chan. I found myself glancing at Amane-sempai, she was watching Yaya and Tsubomi-chan as she slowly went thru her sandwiches. In her eyes, I could see the same thing I was feeling… envy. I wasn't quite sure if she or myself were envious of them having fun and being sweet to each other or were we... envious of Tsubomi-chan?

I didn't realize I was staring at Amane-sempai, I instinctively let out a soft squeak in surprise when I found sandwich softly poking my lips. When my eyes returned to Amane-sempai, I found some calmness in her eyes and maybe even some love… although for some reason I didn't want to pay to much attention to it. My eyes once again fell on the sandwich and my hand began to rise in order to reach it only to be stopped by her own. She looked at me, smiling as she mimicked Yaya-chan's "Aaaaah…" as she slowly presented the sandwich before my lips. I swear I blushed at the sentiment before opening my mouth to receive her offering.

Somehow all thoughts about Yaya-chan vanished for now. I had forgotten their presence here in the same restaurant entirely. I can't say I'm sure that Amane-sempai is the same but at least I could see that most of her attention was on me.

When the our meal ended, we found the table Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan had used earlier had been emptied and was being cleaned for it's next occupants. We soon left the café after Amane-sempai had paid for our meal. I insisted on paying my half of the meal but she insisted on paying for everything.

We found ourselves wandering the city's sights again. Amane-sempai suggested a movie, she first pointed at the horror film that was being advertised and I'm sure she saw all the color drain from my face in an instant. She then apologized after a soft giggle and said she meant to point at the romance story that was being shown beside it. Actually I think she really wanted to watch the horror film, but I'm just a little bit better at these things compared to Nagisa-chan… I'm sorry Amane-sempai.

After the movie, which was very heart warming and at the same time gnawed on my guilt and jealousy a little too much that I'd wanted, me and sempai continued walking around. We found an ice cream stand and I decided to purchase us a couple of Vanilla ice cream cones. Like I did for the café she tried to pay for her cone, I had barely managed to talk her into letting me pay after telling her that I wouldn't feel right if she didn't let me pay this time and also told her that we could take turns in paying so neither of us felt bad about paying for each other, well it was that or we split the payment every time. She just smiled at that and finally agreed which gave me some relief and progress in our relationship.

After a nice walk around the park we found ourselves window shopping, we were about to enter a crafts store of sorts when we heard an impressive tune. We followed the sound to a store two shops beside the crafts store to find Tsubomi-chan watching… Yaya-chan playing the Violin. I must say I was surprised… I never knew that she played an instrument. She was really good at it too…

I found myself walking away form the store with Amane-sempai following beside me. She placed a hand on my shoulder and waited for me to look at her. "Shall we call it a day?" she asked trying to keep a smile on her face, but I knew she was worried from the tone of her voice. All I could do was nod. We got on the train, after sempai had purchased some bottled tea for us. I accepted the bottle she handed to me thankfully, not worrying about the money right now, I believe it was her turn to pay anyway.

"She's a good violinist..." I heard sempai try to break the ice.

"eh?" Somehow it didn't register quick enough in my mind, I found myself staring at her questioningly.

"Nanto-san, she plays well." Amane-sempai was leaning back on her side of the seat, looking relaxed as she held her head up staring at the some of the advertisements that have been placed just above our heads.

I just nodded with a soft "umn…" in response.

"What's wrong Hikari?" she asked, her voice carried a tone of pure worry.

"I didn't know…" I answered honestly.

"Didn't know?" Her voice seemed to soften just as her eyes did.

"I didn't know she played the violin. I don't remember her telling me, nor did I bother to ask her if she did…" Tears began to form in my eyes.

It was really bothering me now. Who did she like? What does she like? What does she dislike? What's her favorite color? What's her favorite food? When did she start singing? Why did she choose me as her roommate? What are her other hobbies? What doesn't she know about me? So many how, what, where, when and who came dashing in my mind. Each brought more and more questions… Where Yaya-chan seemed to know so much about me, I've barely touch the surface of the enigma that is Nanto Yaya.

We rode in silence most of the way. I was depressed right now. Amane-sempai seemed to have noticed it and just took my hand in one of hers and gently patted it, which seemed to calm me a little. She didn't say anything, I wasn't sure if she understood my pain or couldn't find the words to use to cheer my up like Yaya-chan does. But that was alright; _'Amane-sempai is Amane-sempai, Yaya-chan is Yaya-chan.'_

I was glad the train was empty, especially in the last car which we rode. I didn't notice it earlier but she had also been drying my tears for me. She allowed me to rest my head on her shoulder, I found myself slowly drifting to a light sleep.

When I woke up, the train had already gone to a complete stop. It would stay in this station for a few minutes which meant none of the passengers, getting on or getting off had to worry about not making it on time.

"Did you have a good nap?" Amane-sempai asked me with a soft gentle smile.

To which I answered with a nod and a smile of my own. She led us off the empty train, the batch new passengers were just beginning to get on. I found myself pondering on sempai's recent words… _"Did you have a good nap…?"_ her voice replayed in my head once more. Only to be replaced by Yaya-chan's own… a memory of a day we sat outside under the shade of a tree. It was a good memory…

We had a picnic one Sunday morning and I had found myself feeling sleepy after singing, walking with her around the lake and a nice simple picnic meal that we made together. She had told me to rest for a while before we went back to the dorm as it was too early and the warm sun and the cool breeze just felt to good to waste indoors, when I woke up I found myself laying on her lap as and her eyes gently staring down at me with a smile on her lips, and now that I think about it… her smile is very lovely. She brushed off a few stray hairs that threatened to poke my eyes before she greeted me with her cheerful voice and asked me _"Did you have a good nap. Hikari?"_

"Hikari?" Amane-sempai's voice snapped me out of my daydream.

"Yes?..." I asked softly, blushing that I had been strangely out of it.

She just smiled and turned towards the path to our dorms then pointed somewhere there. I turned to look and noticed a familiar, red capped raven haired girl beside a very pink clad shorter girl, that I'm sure was unmistakably Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan.

Neither of us seemed to want to walk up to them and talk. We unconsciously agreed to follow and watch them from afar. When they reached near the dorm gates, they stopped for a bit and so did we. I'm sure Yaya-chan would recognize me at a glance so I decided to hide behind some a tree. We watched Yaya-chan write something on her note book and show it to Tsubomi-chan, who blushed and nodded. I wonder what was written on it.

Yaya-chan then placed her notebook in the bag she carried and then gently cupped Tsubomi-chan's blushing face. 'Is she going to kiss her?!' I thought. It seemed so possible, especially after… I shrugged off the memory of my first kiss… and watched, hoped and prayed she wasn't going to… I found myself clutching the fabric above my heart tightly, as a pang of emotions threatened to squeeze my breath away.

They were still for a few moments… which didn't last too long. Yaya-chan then resumed closing the gap between them. I looked away…

'_NO! Please! NO!' _ What am I saying? Shouldn't I be supporting her at times like these? What's wrong with me…

I then heard an audible sigh of relief coming from Amane-sempai. I turned to her, to see that she looked relieved about something. I turned my attention back to Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan., my unreasoned wish seems to have been granted as I had hoped very strongly that they did not kiss. What I saw instead still surprised me, but relieved me as well. Yaya-chan had placed her arms around Tsubomi-chan's neck, locking her into a tight hug.

I found myself realizing a breath of relief and slowly sat myself on the soft green grass under the tree. I heard the grass beside me rustling and I soon found my neck in between and wrapped with Amane-sempai's arms.

"I'm sorry. I kind of got jealous of them, being so close to each other." She said, blushing as she gazed at me with her soft eyes.

I soon found myself blushing as well. I had to gather up most of my shyness and shove it in a locker in my mind just so I could bring myself to wrap my own arms around her as well. "Me too…" I could feel her smile from the side of my own cheek. I guess our date wasn't entirely ruined.

After a few minutes in each other's arms we rose and were glad to find that Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan were no longer where they once stood. We entered the dorm and slowly parted, saying our soft goodbyes hopefully none of the other students saw us together.

I headed back to our room. But I decided not to hurry at all. _'I should probably give her enough time to change or something. Or she might think I was following her…'_ It took me around 10 minutes to get to our room, when it usually took no more than 3 minutes to get there even when one was just walking. Oh well… I did after all had decided to wander around the ground floor first before heading up to our floor.

When I got to our room, I was a bit disappointed that Yaya-chan wasn't there waiting to greet me. Then again she probably didn't expect me home so early. She was inside our bathroom, taking a shower. I was about to knock and say that I was home, but when I saw the notebook she used a just a few minutes ago on her table the routine just faded out of me. Without really thinking about it, I found myself picking the notebook up and flipping to a few random pages.

Honestly… I didn't like what I saw… it was colorful page with a drawing of herself and Tsubomi-chan, with the lines _"Let's go on a date!"_ I didn't know what to think or what I should feel. A few pages later, I found out that Yaya-chan was actually taking herself to the hospital and asked Tsubomi-chan to accompany her. I randomly turned pages back and forth. A lot of Yaya like responses that made me smile… and a few not the did not seem the least bit like Yaya-chan that I knew and … _'knew and what?...'_ … I sighed at my internal self conflict. _'Should I dare I say love?'_

But if they were just going to the hospital, why were they out having fun… I found myself answering that question, I mean it was really silly of me to ask… I would have done the same so long as I wasn't busy. They were already in town after all why waste the trip… I guess…

My thoughts was soon brought to a screeching halt as the water from the shower suddenly stopped. I hurriedly returned the notebook just as I had found it. I then opened the door loudly that it creaked. "I'm back!" I call out cheerfully… at least as cheerful as I could manage before closing the door once more.

Yaya-chan then came out of the bathroom, her hair was wrapped in her towel she hand already change into something to she could sleep in. She smiled and waved as she looked at me. I don't think I can ever tell her than I read her earlier conversations. She sat on her bed and picked up her notebook, for a second I thought she found out that I had read her notebook, especially when she began writing something. I thought that she was going to scold me right then and there. But to my relief she just welcomed me back to our room and asked about my day.

I had pretty much glossed over today's events. I had paid extra attention so as not to mention the places that we had spotted her and Tsubomi-chan. I could tell that she was a little nervous about it as well like she feared that I'd mention seeing her there. I decided not to mention it for now. After all there wasn't really a good reason for me to… not for now anyway.

After some small talk and short written conversations on her part, she decided to get her homework done so that she could finally catch up and be up to date with the rest of the class. I made some tea for her while she worked which I served along with some sweet butter biscuits. She happily thanked me, noting that she needed something to hold her while we waited for dinner time.

I found myself watching her a lot, the way her eyes lazily gazed at her books as she studied, the way that her lips curled as she would sip her tea, the way she nibbled on each biscuit, the way she very lady like sniffled a bored yawn, the elegant strokes of her pen, the gentle and curious way she stared at me… _'what? oh my…'_ I didn't realized it, I had been staring at her for so long that she caught me. A very familiar smile of mischief crept up of her lips… the very smile that cause countless moments of embarrassments and blushes was now of all times oddly a welcome sight.

She had opened her notebook again, and wrote; _"Hikari… why are you staring at me?"_

"I… uhh… umm…" I couldn't say anything.

"_You have Otori-sama now. She's pretty big catch, you most likely wouldn't need to cheat. But if you did you really shouldn't go for someone like me."_ She quickly wrote and showed me. Her smile weakened… I knew that much without looking.

I didn't know how but I lost it somehow the words cheat and what she called Amane-sempai didn't even register in my mind. It pained me when I read the last sentence, she was demeaning herself, sure it wasn't all there but I knew she was trying to telling me that she wasn't special. And before I could really think about it… I said; "How can you say that! Yaya-chan you're special to me too! You're… you're…" the mischief in her smile faded, the smile itself was gone for a few moments, before being replaced by one that I knew deep inside was genuine. It wasn't a big smile, it wasn't bright, but it was Yaya-chan's real smile.

"_Thank you… Hikari."_ She quickly noted.

Just like that all use for words seemed to have vanished. I found myself throwing myself at Yaya-chan, she dropped her notebook onto the floor in her surprise. I hugged her tightly by her waist while I laying my head on her slim abdomen. Tears of mixed emotions just streamed from my eyes, I tried my best at holding them back. But she didn't seem to mind. I could feel her gentle hand brushing my hair, just like she had done so many times before. I slowly gave in to my tears. I was happy; being here in her arms and the question why did not matter to me right now. I was. And for now that was enough…

… **to be continued.**

**Author's Notes:** Yeah I'm over due to have posted this and a few other chapters. Not to mention the Non-character Narrative Version I've been planning to write. I'll try to make up for it. XD It's just that some things happens and sometimes you either cant find the time to write or you cant find the drive to write. And sometimes I'm just lazy that I just want to read someone else's work or watch random anime here and there.

The outcome of my writing here sort of messed with my original plans XD but then again that's what's fun about writing too, it's like life… you can plan all you want but it doesn't always go they way you want it. Nope sometimes it gets better! XD

Thanks for the comments everyone. I wish for your future support. Do visit my user page to support my Forum, C2 and other works.

Also… _**Please Review!**_ XD


	7. Chapter V : Yaya

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes:

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

Please Review!

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 5: Yaya: My lingering pains**

My heart was still frantically beating even after I had closed the dorm room behind myself. Tossing the notebook somewhere, I rushed to get a fresh set of clothes and a towel. Along I brought an unused bandage and some disinfectant that the nurse gave me for my cut. I then walked into the bathroom, turning on the shower after I had unwrapped the old bandage on my wrist.

I found myself recollecting most of the day with Tsubomi-chan. I particularly found my mind lingering about what had happened just a few minutes ago…

I had just asked Tsubomi to go out with me again sometime. I felt my heart racing happily as she agreed, blushing as she nodded. Then I found myself doing something unexpected… I cupped her face gently with my hands soon after I had slipped my notebook into the bag.

'_A good first date deserves a kiss right?'_ I thought… She looked surprised at the touch. And I could see her blush deepen a few tones as I brought myself closer to her.

'_Her lips look quite delicious right now…'_ I drew closer slightly…

Her eyes softly closed, she seemed to have realized my intent and decided to make it romantic…

Ten inches… nine inches… eight inches… seven… I found myself pausing my advance…

'_This isn't right… Tsubomi-chan likes Hikari. Sure she has even less chances of getting her than I do… but that's really not the point is it?'_ I examined her face, _'she's waiting for me to kiss her… I want to kiss her… But no matter how cute she is, how easy she is to figure out and play with… she's not Hikari is she… this isn't love. Not for either of us. We sort of… caught each other in the rebounded of love.'_

I resumed my approach, softly turning her face ever so slightly, before quickly wrapping my arms around her. She gasped softly to my touch and slightly jumped at the light but audible sound of my lips swiftly kissing her cheek. She let out a low sigh of disappointment but returned the hug.

'_Thank you Tsubomi. And for now… I'm sorry.'_ I know she couldn't possibly have heard me. But at least, hopefully with the hug I could somehow pass the message in my heart.

The hug ended after a few minutes. I confidently recall pulling away. I could tell I was blushing as badly as she was, I did not need to see of feel my face to tell that I was, the incredibly fast beating of my heart was more than enough to inform me of it. I quickly picked up my notebook from the bag before handing it to her. I smiled and wave as I turned to the door and opened it and waved goodbye. Not looking back, thinking that if I did I would have run back into her arms and kissed her right there and then, Kami-sama knows I need it.

The stinging of my wrist brought me back from re-collective daydream. _'I probably stayed too long.'_ I quickly dried off, a few drops of blood found it's way on my towel but it was fine… it's not as bad as yesterday's bleeding. I had heard Hikari over the door, but I couldn't really respond. Carefully I used the disinfectant on the wound before wrapping my wrist in the fresh bandage. I then slipped on to a fresh batch of clothes, which consisted of a red tank top and blue jean shorts, before binding the towel on my long still very moist hair.

When I walked out of the bath I found Hikari standing a little suspiciously in the middle of the room. I smiled and waved at her, and walked over and sat on my bed where my notebook was. I opened it and wrote: _"Welcome Back Hikari. How was your day?"_ showed her and kept smiling while my mind began thinking. _'She came in minutes after I did. I wonder if she saw us… I hoped not. It was a good thing that I didn't go thru with the kiss… who knows how long it could have lasted.'_ I tried my best not to look the least bit guilty. And so far I think I could control it.

She talked about her date… she seemed to have had quite some fun. She had mention that she was in town too. I feared that she might have seen me with Tsubomi already and she's just not telling me yet. I was really nervous about it. I'm quite sure my legs were shaking and I was doing some odd gestures with my hand that I can't quite remember. She didn't seem to notice, or she didn't mention it if she did… I hoped it was the first.

Thankfully she made no mention of seeing me… she asked where I went. I told her; _"I went to the hospital for my appointment, walked around town, a local café, to a movie, walked around town some more before going back to the dorms."_ I kept out the fact that I had Tsubomi accompany me most of the day. I wasn't lying… Technically speaking, after all everything I've told her was the truth. I just kept it simple and the fact is she only asked me where I went not what I did there and who I was with at the time. So yeah technically I'm not lying.

She talked a bit, she talked about the movie she and Ootori had seen a while ago. She seemed happy about their relationship, I'll try not to spoil things for them. I told her I watched the horror movie. She commented about not coincidentally meeting each other there. I laughed silently, but deep inside I was glad we didn't.

I then remembered that I still had a lot of work to do, so I told her that I should get to work so I could catch up with the rest of the class. She nodded and offered to make me some tea, I could only nod and smile to accept and thank her offer. She seemed to be getting used to us talking like this…

After taking off the wet towel that wrapped around my hair and setting it among my other laundry. I began taking out some notebooks and textbooks from my book bag. I set them out in an order of favorite and easy subjects first so that I could be done with them quickly and move to the least favorite and harder subjects. I was just about to finish the easiest subject when Hikari came back with steaming cup of Earl Grey tea and a small saucer of sweet butter biscuits. I smiled and thanked her, writing that I was feeling hungry just about now and that this should help me last till dinner time. She smiled, just sat on my bed for a bit while I returned my attention to studying.

I was writing my English speech essay when I noticed that Hikari seemed to be in a daze… I ignored it for now. Maybe she's just thinking. When I was done with my essay I moved on to math. Again I noticed that Hikari still seemed to be in a daze and was staring at me. I took the time to take a sip of the now slightly warm tea and eat some of the sweet butter biscuits while sparingly watching her from the corner of my eyes. I resumed my studying noting to myself that I should take the time and check if she was watching me.

By the time I was just about done with most of my work I had learned that she had stared at me the whole time. From the way I wrote, to drinking tea, to eating the biscuits, to stifling a yawn… 'What is she up to?' I thought. I guess this is how a gold fish feels. I know I tend to look at her a lot too but I don't stare at her like this… well not since a long… long… long time ago… It was then that a thought popped into my head. I could tease her a bit… Maybe even stir her unconscious desire for me… I tried to hold back a mischievous internal laugh as well as the real one.

I closed the last text and note books softly and opened my special notebook and stared back at her. She didn't seem to notice yet. So I decided to wait until she does. A few minutes later… she blinked several times. I took it as my cute as to have realized that I was staring back at her. I wrote; _"Hikari… why were you staring at me?"_

She inched back a bit, clearly caught of guard and wasn't ready to be teased, though I have to note that she looked a little happy. She began to stutter out words, some that didn't make sense… like random syllables stuck together. "I… uhh… umm…"

Oh my… She's just so cute… she was blushing, stuttering, and seemed completely oblivious that I was teasing her. _'And I've just began.'_ Or so I thought. I had intended to tease her about it wasn't to late if she wanted to be my girl, she had just began going out with Ootori anyway. But what I was thinking was so far off from what I wrote down…

"_You have Ootori-sama now. She's pretty big catch, you most likely wouldn't need to cheat. But if you did you really shouldn't go for someone like me."_ I quickly showed it to her… and regretted it. It was bad enough that she was Ootori's… And now I just sealed it. I didn't know what made me write that… my first guess is guilt that still lingered after stealing her first kiss. That or I was guilty of cheating on her, sure I mean we weren't together… but technically I cheated on my love for her by going with Tsubomi today. Dozens of thoughts quickly passed thru my head… my smile was still there but was neither of mischief nor happiness, it was a fake smile that I had learned to held to hide how I really felt hundreds and thousands of times before.

But then Hikari suddenly said in a loud shaky voice; "How can you say that! Yaya-chan you're special to me too! You're… you're…"

Honestly… I was shocked. I knew that Hikari was a nice and sweet girl. Deep inside me I know that she had already forgiven me for what I've done over a week ago. But one thing that I thought I'd never be for Hikari was someone special. Sure I was her best friend, but I believed that someone could have taken my place… someone else could have been her best friend and treated her just like I had during the past year.

The smile I had forced slowly melted… I looked straight at her she was slightly shaking like she was going to cry at any time now. I was happy beyond words… had I not been mute at the moment I'd probably be stuttering her name right now. I wrote; _"Thank you… Hikari."_ I failed to notice when I smiled… but it felt right.

As soon as she glanced on the paper, Hikari launched herself from my bed and headed right at me. I let go of the notebook, dropping it to the floor, thinking it would hurt one or both of us if it stays in the way. She wraps her arms around my waist and buries her face on my tummy. She was crying, I could hear her softly sobbing and I could feel her tears on my skin moistening the thin fabric of my red tank top. I allowed one of my hands to slowly brush her hair soft blonde brown hair while using my other hand to wipe of a tear drop that threatened to fall, but this felt right… being with Hikari like this. I know it's a selfish dream, to want her for myself… but I guess that's what it means to love. But letting go of something you love is also love. And right now… the one I love is someone I should let go.

'_But for now, I'm going to cherish this moment for all it's worth.'_

Neither of us moved much. The only sounds that could be heard in the room was Hikari's soft sobbing which had died down a few notches over the pass half hour, some small sniffles from both of us and my hand brushing her hair.

'_I'm sorry Hikari… for making you cry again.'_ I truly felt sorry for what I did… and growing more guilty of something else. What if she does fall for me? Sure I'd love that but… she still loves Amane… then this would be very painful… for both of us and possibly the third party, Amane. I'd rather suffer this lost love alone rather than sharing it with her. Hikari shouldn't go thru that. I don't think her sweet and sensitive heart can take that kind of pain.

I continued to slowly brush her hair with my hand, cherishing what could possibly the last time I would hold her this close and familiarly. Promising myself… _'For Hikari… this will be the last time.'_

She slowly stirred up, her arms slowly withdrawing, setting them on her lap… And just in time as well. I was starting to fear my resolve to uphold the promise I made to myself was crumbling. She looked up at me with her slightly redden eyes that looked a bit puffed up, nothing cool water and a short amount of rest wouldn't solve. She was smiling, I couldn't come up with any reason as to why… but she is still very, very cute.

"Yaya-chan…" she gently whispered.

I tilted my head slightly to acknowledge her soft call. "Yes?" I said with my lips. And for what seemed like forever… she just stared at me with the soft smile in her lips.

Our moment of serenity was cut short when a very audible knock came from our room's door. Snapping out of her serene daze Hikari turns away from me, with a tiny blush from her face. "Yes, I'm coming." She stood as she answered the door rising from the now warm spot on the floor which held her delicate body this passed hour.

I could say that I was a little saddened that our little moment was interrupted. But I was also very much relieved. 'Hikari… I will try to be strong, for both of us.' She didn't see it nor did she need to. It was another promise to myself. A difficult and painful one…

I watched Hikari answer the door. I couldn't see who it was yet, but my guess was one of our juniors or someone from the choir. It was rare that our classmates would visit our room. But then again it could be Nagisa-chan and Tamao-san or even Tsubomi but seeing her here would be a little unlikely after what happened hours ago.

"Good Evening Sempai. This is Nanto-Onee-… Nanto-sempai's room am I correct?" said the visitor, I was sure she almost used 'Onee-sama' after my name. I leaned on my chair to get a better view of the person by the door.

"Yes it is." Said Hikari, her voice was polite yet somehow I picked up a tiny hint of what seemed to be annoyance in her voice. But I could be wrong… No! I have to be! Hikari isn't like me. I laughed inwardly at the insulting feeling from the comment I gave myself.

"A package was delivered for her just now. Sister Mamasaka asked me to call her to pick it up in her office." said the girl outside the door.

'_Package?'_ I thought for a moment… _'I mom would have sent a letter or called if she sent… OH!'_ I then remembered all those I items I bought from the art supply store a while ago.

Quickly picking up my notebook and wrote a few words of gratitude to the messenger, who blushed as she saw me. She stiffened and stood straight and quickly said "Th-that wi-wii-will beeeeall. Th-th-thank youforyourtime." She stuttered quite a lot and bowed and turned bowing hitting her head on the door.

"OW…" she rubbed her head for a short moment and blushed even harder.

'_Ouch… that had to hurt.'_ I thought as I moved over to Hikari's side, who just stood there. I didn't have time to look at Hikari's expression, I was worried about the silly and nervous blue haired junior who was kneeling on the floor holding her head in pain gargling an odd mix of ahs and ows.

I knelt in front of the young girl and gently placed my hand on her chin, which resulted into a almost loud, nervous, squealing gasp from said junior. With my other hand, I took hold of her hand that was covering the bump on her head and set it out of the way.

"Onee-sama?..." She blushed harder which made me smile quite broadly inside. _'She did want to say sama… hehehe. I think my head is getting big. I guess this is what most Miator students feel after being called Onee-sama. hahaha…'_ I couldn't believe how happy I felt from just that… maybe I'm in the wrong school.

With the same hand I gently checked her head for any signs of an open wound, taking great care not to let her feel any pressure from my hand. Seeing none I gave her a soft smile while patting her shoulder then quickly wrote: _"There isn't any cut. You should get some ice for that before it gets swollen."_

She just stared at me for a moment, her blush changing to an even darker hue. "Y-y-yes… I wi-will… Th-thank you." Her stuttering was cute. I had often liked walking around the campus looking for girls like her to tease before I had met Hikari.

Bowing properly this time she said goodbye and walked down the hall heading down even though see seemed stiffly nervous. Come to think of it… It was almost dinner time, I had better get those packages. I closed the door to find Hikari just standing there staring at the door in one of her dazes. Usually I'd tease her about it right now. But it's such a hard task now, not that I should tease her anymore. Especially after that mishap just an a while ago.

I wrote: _"I'll be heading to Sister Mamasaka's office to pick up my package or packages."_ and waved the notebook in front of her to get her to snap out of her daze.

She backed away from it a bit an act I'm quite sure was an instinct of caution and dodge the notebook from hitting her face. It wasn't until she saw the contents of the page did she have any real reaction.

"Ah! I'll come with you. Incase you need help." She said which I nodded to as I opened the door for us. If I had my voice I'd tell her I could handle it on my own. I bet she had figured it was heavy or there was a lot… probably because if it wasn't the messenger could have just brought it with her. I didn't bother arguing with Hikari. Instead I decided to relish what time together we could have.

We picked up my packages from the sister's office by the entrance of the dorm. Now that I had actually bought them did I realize that there was a lot, compared to how I looked at them before and after paying. But oh well!... I let Hikari carry the lighter ones which I assume was the sketchbooks, some paint and brushes. We carried them up to our room. She later found out what was inside the packages and asked why I had bought a lot of them. I answered that I had always wanted to try taking up painting and that now seemed like a good chance to get on it.

After all that, the two of us headed down for dinner. Tsubomi ate beside us and was unusually noisy, which I deemed she was either extremely nervous being near me after I had hugged and kissed her cheek a few hours ago or she was making up for what noise I couldn't make thanks to my current condition… but right now I'm not quite sure which one of the two I'd like better. Hikari seemed quiet then, more than usual at least… I'm beginning to wonder what was wrong. Unfortunately maybe it's best that I sit back for now and deal with it when she needs me. Now isn't exactly the best time for me and her to have a heart to heart talk. I'm quite sure my resolve to keep my hands off her isn't strong as I want it to be yet.

Dinner ended without incident. I'm not counting Tsubomi's unusually noisiness, Hikari's silence and the unshakable feeling that some girls were watching me… Yes… more than one. I could oddly distinctly feel Ootori's gaze, I don't know why but her stare felt different… if I have to describe it, it feels… 'manly.' The others felt like curiosity, I'd bet a lot of them were wondering if it's true that I had lost my voice… too bad it's not easily proven.

We headed back up to our room after eating. Hikari had immediately decided to take a bath before bed time. I on the other hand had nothing to do now that I had somehow finished my homework already. So instead I proceeded to organize the art supplies that I had bought. I decided to keep the paints, canvas and easel inside its box for now. It was too late at night to start painting anyway. I started sketching, anything that came to mind… anything except Hikari.

When Hikari exited the bath, I had to pinch myself to not stare. She's just too beautiful. She wore one of her soft yellow colored pajamas, it was a little on the childish side… but it was her unique charm that made her even more beautiful… it's almost a crime to look at her and not to look at her. And I'm not quite sure which one I'd rather be in for. She sat down on her bed after plugging her hairdryer.

I had filled a few pages with some random drawings. Some animals, plants and even our door, this was mainly trying to test how well I can still draw since I haven't drawn seriously since enrolling here in this school. Not that I didn't want to draw anymore… lets just say I was too preoccupied.

I checked the clock and saw it was getting late. I closed my sketchbook and opened my notebook then wrote; _"It's getting late, I'm going to sleep ok? Good Night Hikari."_ and showed it to her. To which she nodded and began to clear her things. Especially the hair dryer she had used just moments ago.

In no time we were both in bed with only the lamp on her side of the room that is still left on. "I'll turn off the lights, alright?" she didn't have to ask really, but I smiled and nodded anyway.

Laying back on my bed, covered by a thin breathing blanket and my soft pillow on my head I found myself slowly drifting of to sleep.

"…"

"an…"

"ya-chan…"

"yaya-chan" I slowly opened my eyes upon realizing that I was in fact hearing a familiar soft voice of my roommate and not groggily dreaming of her. She was kneeling beside my bed, shaking my arm which was still underneath my blanket. What time it was didn't matter really, though I'm sure had I had my voice I'd ask her by now. I sat up and turn on the lamp on my side of the bed and almost reached for my notebook but her hand stopped me.

"Yaya-chan…" She looked at me while hugging her pillow in one hand… with her slightly teary eyes, her voice shook in fear of something which was obvious to me now that I noticed the hand that held mine was shaking. "…I had a very scary nightmare. Would it be alright if I slept beside you?"

My mind went blank for a second… this wasn't the best thing for me. But my protective instincts for Hikari kicked in and I found myself nodding and scooting over to one side of the bed making space for her with me in my single bed. She got on the bed and under the now shared blanket after placing her pillow beside mine. She turned the lights off for me as soon as she was ready. While I on the other hand turned towards the wall and tried to sleep on my side with my back behind her.

I was nervous… had Ootori not been part of this love equation, this sleeping together would be a very welcome request from Hikari and possibly a chance to look good for Hikari. But now this was torment for so many reasons.

"Yaya-chan?" I stirred and turned my head enough to see her. "Could you face this way?... please?" she pleaded. She looked for vulnerable right now. I could say the same for my resolve and sanity… but I suppose I should do as she wants, she'd probably suspect and worry about me if I refuse. Not to mention she would most likely be saddened if I decided not to do as she asks. So I turned to face her and smiled.

"Thank you! Yaya-chan." She said as she suddenly places one hand over my waist while the other took hold of right hand. I was surprised about it and couldn't help but stiffen to the touch. She had her eyes closed already, and started to drift into sleep. I on the other hand had a little trouble doing so… It's not that I didn't like sleeping with Hikari. I've dreamed of this quite a few times before. But now that it had actually and that I couldn't really do anything else but actually sleep… made me a little depressed.

There was another reason that sleep didn't seem so easy. It seems that Hikari while asleep possessed rather… active hands. Her right hand which was on and half way on bottom from my waist, and was tracing the garter of my panties in the most enticing and mind numbing ways. I told myself I should probably warn Ootori about it if I ever forgive her, but even if I don't she'll find out anyway.

I had taken her hand off my bottom quite few times, only for it to return a few minutes later. 'I'll never get to sleep.' Sure maybe I was exaggerating a bit, after all given different circumstances… this would be heavenly. And not falling a sleep for a while would be a small price to pay to have her like this at my side.

I could feel my body warm up to her unconscious 'attention'. I could feel my cheeks warm up so much I felt dizzy, my nether regions were feeling quite warm and moist, had I not been mute I swear I would be moaning quite loudly right now… I didn't realize I was so sensitive to sensual touch. I was beginning to fear where this would lead. But thankfully I soon drifted into a deep sleep before my mind went crazy.

The next day… I felt something incredibly warm and slightly heavy on myself. I wanted to open my eyes, but felt so tired I decided not to mind whatever it was that was so close and warm. I slowly came to realize that this warm thing had spread it's influence and was directly touching my skin. A minute later I realize those 'influence' where arms and they were under my tank top and gently cupped the sides of my breasts.

"Yaya-chan" Upon hearing my name, my eyes flew open in surprise and saw Hikari lying on top of myself with her hands under my tank top. Which by the way made me blush so hard. I screamed out of instinct and surprise. But of course it wasn't any good, after all I had no voice right now... a fact that I failed to remember at that moment.

I calmed down after a few seconds of pointless silent screaming. Hikari wasn't really a very heavy sleeper, but she's not easy to wake up either if she doesn't feel like waking. "Yaya-chan… that tickles…" she mumbled in her sleep. Something I didn't expect from her but it is cute. _'I wonder what she's dreaming of right now…'_ I found my mind wandering for a bit. It was Sunday morning, Hikari liked sleeping in on Sundays. A fact that made me dread the long possible time I'd have to spend underneath her this morning. Not wanting to go insane, I decided to slip away from under her and setting her gently down on the bed before tucking her in.

A bath seemed tempting right now, but as soon as I was out of the bed and away from Hikari's grasp the room's air felt a little cold. It was still dark, probably before sunrise… which for some reason I wanted to watch this morning. I took out a blue jean jacket, that just happened to match my shorts, from my dresser and put it on over my top. I picked up my notebook and exited the room quietly after leaving a short note for Hikari in case she wakes up early.

Outside was even colder enough to make me wish I had worn pants instead, but I didn't let the temperature bother me too much. It was still dark and I was surprised to see quite a few students up and about already. What made it even stranger was because it was a Sunday. Then again some people are stricter about their daily routine than most. From where I stood I could see a few girls joggling around the dorm's property together. In another spot I found some girls carrying bokkens and shinais, most likely they members of the kendo club.

One girl caught my eye for a moment, she was the girl that passed the message about my packages last night. She was being taught by the tall black haired girl in the white and red hakama. She's quite famous and cool in her own way, but not enough to rival 'the prince' and the current etoile. I was watching for a while, I then noticed that the girl from yesterday suddenly froze and didn't move… it took me a while to notice that she was looking at my direction. I turned around to see if anyone else was there but found no body. _'Oh don't tell me… I actually have fans around here…'_ I found myself mentally kicking myself for forgetting the not so subtle hint from her when she called me 'onee-sama' last night. _'Oh well…'_ I decided to smile and wave at her, which caused her to blush and trip on her own feet and soon was being scolded by the tall girl beside her. I couldn't help but giggle as I made my approach thinking 'might as well cheer her up.'

I wrote; _"How is your bump from yesterday?"_ as I walked. I showed the notebook to her when I got near enough. The taller girl didn't seem to mind me talking to her student. Instead she placed her bokken's end down on the ground and held it like a cane while watching us.

The smaller girl stuttered for a while… slowly spitting out words that made no sense for the first few seconds. "Iiiit's fine nona-now. Th-thank you…" I couldn't help but smile… that was just too cute.

I then wrote; _"I see. Good luck with you training then. Work hard alright?!"_ and showed it to her, patting her head lightly as I continued to smile.

"Ye-YES! Thank you very much!" She happily and proudly replied almost without stuttering. I turned to her dark haired trainer, who seemed happy for her student's reborn determination. She bowed to me and mouthed a "Thank you" with out a voice, I assumed this to thank me with out the other girl hearing it.

I bowed to them and waved before taking my leave. I decided to walk around the dorm area to look for a good spot to watch the sun rinse. I felt someone else watching me from behind, her presence was getting closer which I didn't want. Without turning around to see her, I continued to walk hoping that she'll take a hint and stay away for now.

'_I'm sorry Ootori. I don't want to talk to you unless I really have to…'_

**Author's notes:**

Special Guest Appearances by (if you guys haven't guessed): Maehara Shinobu and Aoyama Motoko. Yes, I'm making it look like Shinobu has a deep admiration for Yaya which will I can probably delve on later, maybe as a special intermission chapter.

-Bokken are the wooden swords.

-Shinai is the one that's made of bamboo.

-Hakama is what kendo practitioners wear, and traditionally worn by samurai.

**Please Review!**


	8. Filler Chapter 1 : Shinobu

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes:

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

Please Review!

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Filler Chapter 1: Shinobu : Onee-sama  
**

It's been almost two weeks since I've heard Yaya-onee-sama's voice. I heard the choir members say that she hasn't been attending practice for over a week now. I'm worried about her, but it really isn't my place to go and ask her about it. I'm nobody to her. So all I can do is ask someone who might know.

I was walking around the halls when I spotted Tsubomi-san, walking towards my direction. I waved at her while calling her name. "Tsubomi-san!" I could ask Tsubomi-san, she's a classmate of mine and she is part of the saintly chorus with Yaya-onee-sama.

She looks at me and waves, she was in a wonderful pink dress with red ribbons that complemented her hair. "Hi! Shinobu-san, What can I do for you?"

I blushed for a moment, nervous to ask my question. But strengthening my resolve I asked away. "Is it true that Yaya-sempai has lost her voice?"

Tsubomi suddenly froze and blushed quite brightly. I instinctively swallowed nervous of what that reaction of hers had meant. _'I does Tsubomi-san like Yaya-onee-sama?'_ I continued to watch Tsubomi-san, she seemed out of it for the moment. I wonder if something was wrong with Yaya-sempai that Tsubomi-san can't say.

"Ah… Um… Yeah!" She suddenly and nervously began saying. "She says the doctor said that it may take a while for her to get her voice back."

'_What?! Oh my… Poor Yaya-onee-sama…'_ I thought sadly. Yaya-onee-sama was so nice and cool why did something like this have to happen to her.

"I see… That's too bad…" Was all I could say.

"Hahaha… Yeah it is. Maybe it is Kami-sama's way of saying if she doesn't want to use her beautiful voice he'll give it to someone else who wants to use it." She laughed hard at that. I thought it was mean of her. I'm told that Tsubomi-san and Yaya-onee-sama don't get along too well. I wonder why that is so.

"That was a little mean, Tsubomi-san." I told her meekly. I didn't intend to speak it out… but it suddenly slipped out of my mouth.

"… Yeah… I guess so…" her laugh and smile disappeared almost instantly. I decided to apologize.

"I'm sorry Tsubomi-san! I didn't mean it like that."

She smiled and looked out the window. "I know… But it was mean of me…" so she said… which was something I didn't expect to come from her, at least if it was something that had to do with Yaya-onee-sama. I found myself wondering about Tsubomi-san as well. She wasn't this quiet before. Something seemed off… I wonder if something had happened between them and Yaya-onee-sama.

"I'll see you later Shinobu-san. I want to have a shower and change of clothes." I nodded as she continued her walk towards her room.

I soon found my thoughts back to Yaya-onee-sama. Tsubomi-san had just confirmed that she had in fact lost her voice somehow and from what she says it may be a while before we could hear Yaya-onee-sama's voice again. I wonder how she's taking it.

I found myself roaming around the dorm house for a while and ended up at the main entrance where I saw a security guard and a delivery man had just exited the Sister in charge's office. They then bowed and exited the building. The sister spotted me and called me closer.

"Yes can I help you Sister?"

She smiled as she looked at me before telling me her request. "Would you go to room 212 and tell Nanto Yaya that there is a Package waiting here in my office."

'_Room 212?! Yaya-onee-sama's!?'_ I was startled at first surprised to hear that the sister was asking me to go and deliver a message to my idol… this is almost a dream come true. I had to pinch myself to snap me awake.

'_Ouch!'_ wait… _'that hurt!... I'm not dreaming!'_ this is my chance to talk to Yaya-onee-sama!

"Maehara-san? Maehara-san?!" I realized that my thoughts had dazed me for a moment seemingly causing the sister alarm.

"I'm sorry… I got lost in thought." I bowed and apologized to the her.

She sighed, most likely disappointed at me. It was very rude to space out in a conversation. "That's all right. Please call her right away." She said as she turned toward her office once again.

But suddenly I thought that maybe I could bring her package up to Yaya-onee-sama instead. "Excuse me?" I called to ask her.

"Hmm?" she paused and turned her head to look at me.

"Can't I just bring the package to her?" I asked twiddling my thumbs.

"You could… but…" She paused and opened the door to her office.

'_but what?'_ I turned and looked into her office. And was surprised that what greeted us were a few big boxes that all had the 'FRAGILE' marked in big, bold, red letters all over. I swallowed nervously and realized why sister only asked me to call for Yaya-onee-sama. I'm quite clumsy with heavy things… auw…

"I'll go tell her then." Was all I could say. I felt embarrassed that the sister knew that I am clumsy and cannot be responsible for something fragile. She just smiled sadly and patted my shoulder.

I turned and headed upstairs where Yaya-onee-sama's room is.

"208… 210… 212!" _'I'm here.'_ I thought as I tried to calm myself. I'll finally get to see Yaya-onee-sama up close. 'I hope she's here. I hope she's here. I hope she's here.' I prayed deep inside. I took a deep breath before I knocked on the door.

There was only silence for a few moments after the knock, I raised my hand to knock again.

"Yes, I'm coming." Said a voice from the inside, it did not sound like Yaya-onee-sama. I had assumed the worst when I heard it. _'Oh my Yaya-onee-sama has someone already. And they're sharing the room already!'_ It took me a few seconds to remember that Yaya-onee-sama was sharing a doubles room with...

The door opened and I am faced with Konohana Hikari, Yaya-onee-sama's roommate and best friend. "Good Evening Sempai. This is Nanto-Onee-… Nanto-sempai's room am I correct?" I swear her eye brow twitched when I almost said Onee-sama.

She then nodded and said; "Yes it is." I don't know why but I feel that Konohana-sempai looked annoyed for some reason. I'm told that she's really nice. But I think I'm going to trust my instinct about her for now. And it was telling me to get my business done and leave… Quickly! "A package was delivered for her just now. Sister Mamasaka asked me to call her to pick it up in her office."

She nodded and opened the door wider revealing… Yaya-onee-sama, in a very skimpy red tank top and tight blue jean shorts. I couldn't help but blush and force my self to swallow even though my mouth was incredibly dry from being so nervous. I was completely stunned to see so much of Yaya-onee-sama's divine figure. She looked and headed my way after writing something in her notebook.

I panicked… "Th-that wi-wii-will beeeeall. Th-th-thank youforyourtime." I quickly and badly said as I bowed and turned away.

"**OW!"** for a moment my head was struck with pain. I found myself on my knees holding the left side of my head, where I realized I hit the door frame with.

"auw…oh…auow…."

I soon realized that Yaya-onee-sama was in front of me, smiling. She gently held my chin which made me yelp in surprise. But her hand stayed where it was. With her other hand she took hold the hand that was holding that side of my head.

"Onee-sama?" I said without thinking. But then I found myself not minding it, when I saw her smile widen. She gently lifted my hand away and gently ran her hand thru my hair lifting it ever so carefully to check on the possible wound on my head. Her hands let go and I could see her smile soften a bit. She picked up her note book and began to write something.

"_There isn't any cut. You should get some ice for that before it gets swollen."_ Was what she said. _'I guess it was true that she had lost her voice.'_

"Y-y-yes… I wi-will… Th-thank you." I couldn't help but stutter and blush. I was so nervous and yet so happy at the same time. _'Yaya-onee-sama touched me. She touched me!!!'_

After a short while, I felt a little calmer now. Or at least enough not to hit my head on the door frame again. I turned to leave after bowing once more as a thank you and farewell. I turned and walked towards the stairs to tell sister that I had given Yaya-onee-sama the message.

I returned to my room, which I used to share with someone of the same year. But she requested a room change with someone she got along with quite well and I've been alone in this room for about a month now. I didn't mind really, It actually gave me more space and privacy… especially since Motoko-sempai tells me that I sometimes tend to space out and mumble when I'm day-dreaming. I did what Yaya-onee-sama had advised and had gotten some ice from the kitchen on my way back here. I placed them into an Ice bag and let it gently rest on my head as I laid on my bed and awaited dinner.

Later at dinner I found myself watching Yaya-onee-sama. To her right sat Konohana-sempai and to her left sat Tsubomi-san. I don't know why but it was quite rare that Yaya-onee-sama was in the middle. Usually Konohana-sempai was in the middle of the two, I wonder what's going on.

Another thing I've noticed is that Ootori-sama, has been looking at their direction for the most part of dinner. I've heard rumors about Ootori-sama and Konohana-sempai going out… but lately there were talks about her talking to Yaya-onee-sama in private.

'_I hope I'm just thinking too much.'_

The next day… it was 5 in the morning when I heard the familiar and very routinely sound of knocking on my door. I sat up awake and said that I was up now.

"Good. I'll wait for you as usual." Said the girl by the door, who I was sure is Motoko-sempai.

I got changed into my jogging pants and tee-shirt, raced out of the room after washing my face and picking up the shinai that Motoko-sempai had given me to practice with. In a few minutes I caught up to sempai who was swinging her sword to practice her downward slash. She told me to do what she did…

We practiced for a few minutes. It was still cold this morning but I could feel myself sweating already. I was feeling alright, the warmth my body made with each swing, the feeling of getting a good exercise from my muscles, and Yaya-onee-sama's gaze.

'_EH?!!'_ It took me seconds to realize, that Nanto Yaya… the Ace of the saintly chorus and my big time crush was looking at my direction… for the second time within 24 hours! To my surprised, Onee-sama confirmed it… and waved at me… I blushed and lost my footing and ended up on my behind.

"Shinobu… That was embarrassing." Said Motoko, who sounded very disappointed. She lectured me while I hang my head down in shame.

Before we realized it, Yaya-onee-sama had approached us and showed me her notebook. _"How is your bump from yesterday?"_ She had a soft concerned on her face. I felt like smiling but given the embarrassing situation I couldn't help it right now.

"Iiiit's fine nona-now. Th-thank you…" I told her.

She smiled brighter and wrote again. _"I see. Good luck with your training then. Work hard alright?!"_ She showed me the message and patted my head lightly. Causing me to blush and smile at her concern and encouragement. And thanks to that I was some how able to say "Ye-YES! Thank you very much!" without stuttering too much. She then bowed and turned to leave waving till she was a few feet away from us.

"… Onee-sama…" I felt like drifting into a daydream… but soon found myself on the ground again, after feeling something solid poked me from behind. I turned to see Motoko's bokken pointed at me.

"Sempai…" mumbled fearfully.

"Shinobu…" Motoko-sempai's voice sounded cold. "you're drooling."

My eyes grew wide in surprise. '_Eh?!'_ I lift my wrist to wipe at my face and found out that it was true…

"Since when?!!" I asked her.

"Since you saw her…" she replied in a way that was very convincing.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

_**End of Filler Story.**_

Author's notes: This was made as a filler story. As well as to feature a fan-girling Shinobu and Motoko a little more. And maybe to give Yaya a popular side, even if it was just one fan girl for now. They may or may not have much of a relation in the story... yet. But it makes a great read and more Yuri lovin'wouldn't you agree?

**_Please Review!!!_**


	9. Chapter VI : Hikari

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

**Author's Notes: **I would like to apologize for the long delay. I hit a wall for some time. Nothing good came out of my head for that long while. Also I'm making a Yaya's Voice discussion thread. please feel free to drop ideas, scenes or comments. You never know what can come in handy.

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 6: Hikari: Was that a dream?**

I sat down for lunch with Yaya-chan, who was still in line after failing to choose what she wanted to eat for the past twenty minutes. I was taking a bite out of my sandwich when I realized that it was Thursday once again… it had been a week since I've learned that Yaya-chan had lost her voice. I almost can't believe it. But waking up and seeing her greet me with a written note each morning… makes me slowly realize that this is not a dream.

Speaking of dreams…

I've been having a recurring dream… one with Yaya-chan with me… in her bed… and almost naked… ever since that night where I had spent the night beside her in her bed, all because of a nightmare that I could not remember.

In the dream… I awaken in the middle of the night… or maybe it was morning already. Yaya-chan was facing me, 'her face looked sad.' I thought. _'…but beautiful.'_ That was the first time I thought that about Yaya-chan. Well honestly I know she's beautiful… it's just that, at that time… it felt different.

Her sleeping face in the darkness was a wondrous template, the way her eyes were closed was beautiful beyond words… the way her lips was pursed was seductively entrancing… the way her dark hair fell on her face and skin was like a shining silk curtains... I stared at her for what seemed like an eternity. But even an eternity can be just a second when it ends.

I don't know why, but I found myself coming closer to her. Slowly leveling my face with hers… and kissing her lips. It felt so real that I could feel her, smell her and taste her. I found myself withdrawing… thinking, wishing, and believing… that this truly was a dream. I kissed her again and again, but she stayed asleep… just as I wanted. I took my time to enjoy her, I caressed her skin anywhere that wasn't covered and too hard to reach. She responded in small gasps that sounded in approval of my ministrations.

Pausing or stopping didn't occur to me. It was a dream, a dream with Yaya-chan. I didn't know why I was doing what I was doing. Other than… _'She is beautiful…'_

I found myself growing bolder, realizing that I had just slipped my hands under her top and was touching her soft breasts. I even thought; _'Even in my dreams… Yaya-chan doesn't wear a bra.'_ I dared do something that she seemed to like doing to me whenever we're taking a shower together...

I touched...

...caressed...

...fondled her breasts... _'she is so soft…'_ and her sleeping breath sounded like music to me. It was enchanting. She was enchanting… so much that I had considered doing this to Yaya-chan… for real.

The dream ended there and I found myself waking in Yaya-chan's bed the morning I first dreamt it, a fact that I didn't immediately remember. The sun was shining brightly through our bedroom window. It took me a while to fully wake up. And the first thing I realized was… I was in the wrong bed. The second was Yaya-chan was not on her bed… or mine. Which wasn't the least bit unusual to me, she has always been a morning person even though people would guess other wise.

It took a while to register to me that I had two pillows. One on my head, and the other was in my arms. It gave off the scent of Yaya-chan's shampoo and a hint of her own. It was enough to make me recall my dream. I blushed and wondered why I had such a dream, and with Yaya-chan of all people.

Deciding to push the thoughts away from my mind for a while, I sat up and found a note on Yaya-chan's desk. It folded so that it could stand; a part of it was facing me. It took me a moment before I realized that it was addressed to me. I reached for it and opened it.

_Hikari, _

_I felt like going out and watching the sunrise. In case I'm not back, eat breakfast without me. _

_-Yaya_

_P.S.:Good Morning!_

Is what it said. I placed the note somewhere and got a look of the clock. I was glad it was Sunday; had it been a week day… waking up this late would be embarrassing. Although I usually don't worry about that, since Yaya-chan always wakes me up if I take too long… except that week, when she was avoiding me.

I was shaken off from my thoughts when I heard… "Did you remember the hickey on Yaya-san's neck last Sunday?"

'_HICKEY!?!'_ my mind screamed. I recalled fragments of the dream and found myself listening in to the conversation the girls at the table behind me was having.

"It was pretty small that you could barely see it." said a girl who sounded familiar.

"You've been talking about Yaya-sempai a lot lately Rin." said another who sounded younger. I realized that the one called Rin was probably one of our classmates, Tousaka-san.

"It's Sakura who brings her up so much." retorted Tousaka-san.

I heared another girl gasp and drop her fork. "… I… didn't mean… too…" she said meekly.

I then heard someone patted someone's shoulder lightly. "It's okay, Sakura. I'm quite sure you're not the only girl who crushing on Nanto-san…"

'_Eh?!'_ I felt a little panicked for some reason. _'why am I panicking?'_ I asked myself… probably because I'm overhearing rumors about my own best friend. Yeah, that's got to be it…

"…But if you want to get her you better get more aggressive. Before the one that gets to lightly land a hickey on her gets her." continued Rin.

I wondered who could have… It took a moment, but I realized. It could have been me. No there's no doubt… It could only have been me. It's so clear now I had that dream because I was sleeping beside Yaya-chan. And it happened on Sunday… the same day that these girls said that she had a hickey.

"But you know. I saw Yaya-sempai this morning. She had a new one under her chin."

'_EEK!!!'_ I had slept beside Yaya-chan again last night and had that dream again. I wonder if she had noticed…

I found myself listening to the girl's conversation more. The little girl, called Ilya mentions that the only reason that Sakura was with them watching Amane-sempai's riding lately was because Yaya-chan was not present in the saintly chorus. Rin claims that she loves horses… while 'subtly' revealing that Ilya has a crush on almost every rider in the horse riding club.

The girls continue talking; but little by little anything they say no longer register in my head. I find myself contemplating on their words, mostly those that had anything to do with Yaya-chan. I found myself thinking about her.

She's changed… I know that loosing her voice poses a great hindrance to her lifestyle, but she doesn't seem that much concerned or at least she's not showing it. She makes it look like that she's been conversing with a pen and paper since we've known her and not many seem to complain about it.

She's also been acting differently… I know that she can't tease us as much as she has before, but she hasn't teased me since… since I found out she had lost her voice. She's been quiet, doing things that don't require her voice. Like drawing or reading. Another thing is that she has been returning from school just near curfew.

I'm getting concerned but I haven't asked her about any of it. I'm not sure if I have to or should ask her about it. I mean it's not like last time… when she's been avoiding me. But this feels like she's also avoiding me… or should I say… … I don't know what to think anymore. It's all too confusing.

Just then I felt a hand touch my shoulder. I was so absorbed in my thinking that the simple touched surprised me… causing me to jump away a bit and **"YAAAA."** scream…

I was surprised to see Yaya-chan looking at me with one of her eyebrow raised in a curious fashion. She stood nearly beside me, her arm was still raised and near my shoulder but was soon lowered.

"I'm sorry Yaya-chan. I was a little out of it." I excused.

She held a laugh and forced herself to smile nicely and nodded twice or thrice. _'there it is!!!'_ I could feel my face heating up when I noticed the said hickey under her chin. It wasn't such a big or obvious thing, but small and blended with her skin color enough for anyone not looking for it not to notice, which made me wonder how those girls noticed it. I watched her sit down and begin eating her soup… I then noticed… that ever since she lost her voice, I haven't seen her eat as much as she usually does. She looks thinner lately. I wonder why she's not eating much?...

It didn't take long for the girls from the other table to notice Yaya-chan was now present at the seat in front of me. They whispered amongst themselves for a moment, try as I might to hear what they were saying… but all I could hear was 'go!' 'ask her' 'can't' 'come on!' but after a few moments, I could hear the girl behind my stand and walk over near Yaya-chan side.

"Good Afternoon! Nanto-san. Konohana-san." A girl with dark long dark hair tied into twin tails greeted us both in a polite and well raise manner.

"Good Afternoon! Tousaka-san." I greeted back with a smile, trying not to be rude. I have to admit I was curious of what she wanted to talk to Yaya-san about. But at the same time very nervous… and hoping she would not mention the hickeys that I might have gave her in my sleep.

Yaya-chan looked up from her meal, smiled and waved a hand.

Tousaka-san blushed slightly and began to look a bit nervous that she usually does. "Pardon me asking Nanto-san, a lot of girls have been wondering about this lately…"

'_OH! NO!... she's going to talk about the hickey!'_ I nervously and nearly in panicked thought.

"They wanted me to ask you too… Um… too…" she cleared her throat, for a moment to ease her nervousness… which unfortunately increased mine. "Would it be alright… if some girls form a Fan Club for you?"

'_EH?... Fan Club?'_ I echoed in my mind. I never thought Yaya-chan was so popular. I turned to face Yaya-chan, who was looking at Tousaka-san in disbelief. I could feel an odd sense of foreboding around us. Taking the time and care to look around our table, I noticed that a lot of girls were looking at Yaya-chan's and Tousaka-san's direction.

Yaya-chan then flipped open her notebook and wrote: _"Do I have to do anything?"_ and showed it to Tousaka-san.

She read it, smiled and shook her head. "The only thing we need you to do is recognize it as your Fan Club."

I turned to Yaya-chan who looked like she was thinking about it. But she then smiled and wrote: _"If that's all I guess It won't really hurt would it..."_

Tousaka-san nodded. "Well girls you can worship her all you want now!" She said aloud.

Little did we realize we were in the center of all Yaya-chan fans… A lot of girls stood up around us and screamed for joy. Then converged around our table and began throwing out comments that I've only ever heard being told to Amane-sempai. They began asking all sorts of questions, too fast for Yaya-chan to answer without her voice. _'Like thoughtless over exited girls.'_

Yaya-chan looked like she was in a pinch and we had yet to finish our lunch. "Umm… everyone! I think you're bothering Yaya-chan." I said without thinking how the girls will react to my comment of their actions. I found myself in the receiving end of the fan-girls angry glares. They also began saying mean things like.

"Who are you to tell us that?"

"Aren't you the one who's always bothering Yaya-sama!"

"What do you know?!"

And… "You don't deserve Yaya-onee-sama's attention!"

I felt like crying… I didn't mean what I said, at least not the way they took it. Tears slowly escaped from my eyes when we were all surprised and silenced by a loud banging on the table. All the other girls backed away slightly.

Yaya-chan had slammed both of her hands down on our table. She looked… angry… very angry. Her eyes were closed… like she was thinking or waiting for the girls' reactions. Her lips slightly open, and I could see that she was gritting her teeth, holding back the harsh words and the desire to shout. I remember when I asked Yaya-chan when was the last time she got angry. She told me she could not remember, she didn't tell me what it was like but she did tell me she hated getting angry.

And I think I can feel why… Yaya-chan gives of a very scary feeling. Even I feel scared and I believe that her anger isn't directed at me.

After a minute or two of silence, Yaya-chan lets out a sigh. Her face softens from angry to disappointment. She picks up her notebook and steps away from her seat. All eyes including mine were watching her as she walked to my side and took my hand.

When I questioningly looked at her she did a small head gesture pointing towards the exit. I understood that she wanted us to leave the cafeteria immediately. Even though she had not eaten much yet…

"Aren't you going too…" before I could even finish my sentence, she shakes her head and lightly tugs on my hand. I could only nod and follow my best friend. The girls were quiet as we left, I guess they were stunned at Yaya-chan's reaction. I thought that Yaya-chan would be happy having a fan club, but I'm happy to know I as her best friend came first.

We returned to our classroom earlier than most. Yaya-chan slumped on her desk weakly, not the least bit embarrassed of her growling stomach. I felt sorry for her, so I told her that she could go back to the cafeteria and get something. She then wrote a note that told me that even though her stomach was growling she didn't feel like eating anymore. I doubted if that was possible but Yaya-chan is not someone to do something when she doesn't want to.

Our first teacher made a comment about Yaya-chan's loud and complaining stomach. Yaya-chan just said she didn't feel like eating and the teacher made some comment about Yaya-chan being lazy… but that's the farthest from the truth. The truth is that she didn't want to make a big story of what happened to us in the cafeteria. Or at least that's what I'd like to think she's thinking. I'm not saying that I know how Yaya-chan thinks. I find myself checking on Yaya-chan every now and then, for the rest of our afternoon classes. She tiredly took notes and tried to pay attention. It made me feel bad knowing that I'm the cause of her hunger now. _'I shouldn't have said anything back then...'_

Classes ended hours later and the first thing I told her was to get someone thing to eat. She laughed and smiled before nodding and packing up her things. Unlike before, we'd go almost anywhere together after class. A Thursday was supposed to be a free-day, but last Friday's skipping meant that we had choir practice today and tomorrow, and I'm the only one going. I have asked Yaya-chan where she went when I'm at the saintly chorus. She had told me that she was just drawing, here and there.

She wrote something about finally having the will to eat, which we found funny and laughed at for a bit before separating.

Midway from the church I saw some girls standing there in a line. When I got closer I realized that they were the same girls that got angry and yelled at me for telling them they were bothering Yaya-chan. I stopped a few meters away, while they too it as a sign to come closer. I was nervous… I wasn't the least bit ready to be yelled at again. And this time Yaya-chan was no where to protect me.

"Hikari-sempai…" said one girl.

I swallowed… hard. Anxiety was getting to me, but before my fear got any worse.

"**We are very sorry!"** the group said in unison.

I was surprised to find them all bowing their heads. "huh?" was all I could say.

One girl stepped forward. She had long purple hair and looked quite shy, like me. "We would like to apologize for our actions against you earlier. Hikari-sempai. In our excitement we had forgotten the one that Yaya-sama held most important."

"…most important?" I echoed questioningly.

"Yes. We have been watching Yaya-sama for a long time now. And we know that… you, her best friend, are very important to her." she explained, while her and everyone's heads remained bowed down.

"I see…" I was pretty much speechless. It really made me feel good… knowing I was important to Yaya-chan. Well I knew it a long time ago… but I have probably not realized just how important. For even other girls to realize how important I am to Yaya-chan made me want to re-evaluate how I should hold Yaya-chan as my best friend. Everyone was silent for a while, even me. It was a bit to take in.

I then bowed to them too. "I would also like to apologize."

"Hikari-sempai!" They called out in surprise.

"I didn't mean what I said earlier. Well… at least not the way it came out. I just wanted Yaya-chan to eat, she hasn't been eating quite like she had been before… I was a little worried. I know I had offended you as well. I am sorry." I told them.

"Of course. Please forgive us too." said the purple haired girl.

"I have already." I smiled as I raised my head.

They took their turns thanking me and giving me personal apologies, which I accepted. I had told them that they should probably apologize to Yaya-chan too. The purple haired girl who introduced herself as Sakura, told me that they were going to but Tousaka-san said that they best apologize to me first, before apologizing to Yaya-chan. It made sense after a while. When she explained Tousaka-san thinks that Yaya-chan would send them to me even after they had apologized to her, before even considering if she should forgive the girls.

We soon gave our farewells, the girls of Yaya-chan's fan-club now headed to look for her. It slipped my mind to tell them that Yaya-chan might be eating, since she had not eaten much at lunch time. But they could probably guess that, so I don't really have to worry about it.

I headed to choir practice in the church. I was late getting there, but fortunately the leader was late as well. Which meant no one gets punished. And all in all, practice was pretty much the same. The girls had asked about Yaya-chan. Tsubomi-chan and I were "interrogated" separately for it, which was a good thing.

After our practice, I found myself staying in the church after everyone had left. I had been… avoiding Tsubomi-chan lately. But I realized that it seemed that she was avoiding me as well. I know that I've been trying not to ask her about her date with Yaya-chan and all things with it… especially the hug she got. I must be acting silly, I mean, I've hugged Yaya-chan and even slept beside Yaya-chan… … I don't even know what I'm thinking anymore. Suffice to say, I don't want to talk to her about it yet and neither does she.

I felt a hand touch my shoulder. Which, like earlier this afternoon… surprised me.

"**YAAAAAAAAAA" **I tried to jump away from the hand and turned to its direction.

"Hikari. It's just me." said the person who's hand was still on my shoulder, who I soon realized was Amane-sempai. I was surprised to see her here and that she still in her school uniform… didn't she practice riding today?

"I'm sorry sempai. I was deep in thought." I felt a blush coming up to my cheeks as I apologized. I wanted to ask why she was here… but it just wouldn't form.

"It's alright Hikari. I'm sorry for sneaking up on you." she said as took her hand off my shoulder. She walked a bit and sat beside me on the church bench. "What were you thinking so deeply about Hikari?" She asked, trying to give me the caring soft smile that she always does.

I quickly considered telling her about Yaya-chan, and what happened in my dreams. But then I figured that it might be best not to… I'm not sure how she'd react. Instead I found myself telling her about Yaya-chan's Fan Club.

…_**to be continued.**_

**Author's Note: **Yeah it's kind of short, after a long absence. Sorry about that. But like writing a story… where even a writer's idea changes. You never know when a writer will have a writer's block.

And haha! Honestly the Fan Club was a little unplanned… But something I can use for more fun, drama, and yuri lovin! XD Expect Filler chapters, featuring characters outside the Strawberry Panic.

Special guest appearances by:

Tousaka Rin, Matou Sakura and Illyasviel von Einzbern from "Fate/StayNight". Why them? Coz they were either cool and or cute! And wasted on Emiya Shirou XD

**YURI BANZAI! XD**

_**Please Review!**_


	10. Filler Chapter 2: Rin

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes:

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

Please Review!

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Filler Chapter 1: Rin : A Fan-Club huh?**

The other girls have been bothering me about this for weeks… It's about my classmate, Nanto Yaya… Former Choir Ace, a bit of a troublemaker but an especially good friend to have. Or at least so I've heard. She's been my classmate since I entered Spica, so that's probably about two and a half years by now. We don't really talk much; though I'm quite sure she tried to befriend me once last year. Unfortunately I was pretty much not talking to anyone at the time.

Anyway a lot of girls who have started to like her have been starting to meet. Sharing encounter stories with Nanto-san, any rumors surrounding her, a great collection of pictures nude and non-nude a like and even articles that she had touched. I recall someone auctioning her hair and made a small fortune. After all that I thought they'd be satisfied. But unfortunately it seems that they want the girl to recognize them. And I happened to suggest to them about forming a club and having it acknowledged by her. It happened like this…

About two months ago… Sakura, my… uh... friend and junior had been infatuated with Nanto Yaya. I don't exactly know when she started liking her. But I do know she's been awfully obsessed… I mean she's bought quite a few pictures of her and she did buy a swimsuit and a few articles of clothes that the girl had sold because it didn't fit her anymore. When I asked about it before, Sakura said that she liked the clothes not who wore it before.

Anyway Sakura's interest and admiration has been growing quite steadily and me, being the Nanto-san's classmate, instantly elected me a position to get information and things that Nanto-san has used and left. At first I didn't really understand her obsession. And just to satisfy her I gave her small random things like a crumpled piece of paper, a broken pencil and even a string, then claim that Nanto-san had used them.

It was easy and not the least bit troublesome… to me or Nanto-san. But after I saw Sakura's happy face, holding fake Nanto Yaya touched items… I felt bad and went after something I'm sure Sakura would forgive me if I gave it to her. And that was a few strands of Nanto-san's hair. It was hard task… I had tried almost anything to get me some of her hair. But in the end I ended up just asking her for it… And the surprising thing was she gave it to me barely asking why.

Even Sakura was surprised when I handed to her a small bundle of about 3 inch long raven black hair. But not as surprised when she learns that the next day that the girl had cut her hair a few inches short. Sakura traded a few strands of that hair to collect pictures and items of Nanto-san's. She was pretty satisfied after that. She knew nothing could beat owning a part of Nanto-san.

After a while she and other girls formed a fan club. Sure they were informal and unknown to the one they were worshiping… but they seemed happy. I hear that they would go to all her recitals… relay anything new about her and the likes. I'm surprised that Nanto-san hasn't noticed. That or she doesn't mind.

But after a while they seemed to want more. One night Sakura told me about their club's depression that began to escalate since Nanto-san had stopped coming to choir practice. I jokingly told her that they should just confront Nanto-san and get her acknowledgement that they had a fan club dedicated to her, so that they could worship and watch her closely like Ootori's and Hanazono's fan clubs do. It was supposed to be a joke, or at least a half assed suggestion.

Unfortunately Sakura didn't see it that way. She had told the other members of the club that they should do that. And unfortunately the one who had to ask was… me.

I asked them why. I expected that they would say some stupid reason about it being my suggestion so I had to do it. But instead I got begging and something about me being the only person they know close enough to Nanto-san. Also something about since I wasn't a fan I didn't have to worry about revealing myself when Nanto-san declines. Which made sense, if they were discovered they would have a harder time stalking her wouldn't they?

I agreed after some convincing… but to too a while for me to actually get the chance too.

And that chance came a Thursday afternoon. Some girls had spotted her and her best friend heading to the cafeteria for lunch. Myself, Sakura and Ilya followed them and saw them in line. We ordered our food almost before the two friends could. Actually… only Konohana-san ordered, while Nanto-san too her time deciding what to eat. Since we had ordered we'd only look suspicious if we stayed standing, so we headed for a table where a few of Sakura's friends have already gathered.

We almost aborted the plan, until I soon realized that the girl that sat behind me on the other table was Konohana-san. Ilya and Sakura talked, about Nanto-san… even dragging me to the conversation, something about a hickey on Nanto-san. I could have sworn I heard Konohana-san jump of her seat just a tad bit when she heard it. It took a while before Nanto-san came with her tray of food. I almost laughed when I heard the blonde girl, jerk and scream in surprise when her best friend touched her shoulder and claimed to be out of it.

The girls including Sakura, then began pleading me to ask Nanto-san now. I delayed it for a bit, making some excuse about wanting to finish my food… but I wanted Nanto-san to eat a bit, she looked like she needed it. I mean everyone has notice how thinner she's getting. But after a few minutes the girls just wont let me be.

I stood up and walked to Nanto-san. I brought out my most polite smile, even though the people I am about to greet are my classmates... I just felt the need to appear extra nice and proper to ask this question.

"Good Afternoon! Nanto-san. Konohana-san." I greeted them. Making sure I called them by their family names. I wouldn't want to start making it look like we are close or anything. I'm quite sure Sakura and the damn group of fan girls would start bothering me even more.

The blonde girl was the first to look up and greet me. "Good Afternoon! Tousaka-san." she said with a smile. But there was this great feeling of dread and anxiety around her. Which made me wonder if the girl was starting to have feelings for her best friend, while still seeing the one girl most of Spica would do almost anything to give them the time of day.

I turned to Nanto-san, she smiled and waved at me. I don't know why but I felt a bit warm… I must be nervous too.

"Pardon me asking Nanto-san, a lot of girls have been wondering about this lately…" realized that my hands were shaking a bit when my mind noted that my eyes were in deep contact with hers. I tried to keep calm and level headed. I can't back out of this now.

"They wanted me to ask you too… Um… too…" I was really nervous. Why did it have to be me?!

I coughed lightly into my closed fist to clear my throat. "Would it be alright… if some girls form a Fan Club for you?"

'There I finally said it!' I looked at Nanto-san… she didn't look too surprised by the question. In fact she appeared quite calm. Which ticked me off a bit… of course I wasn't stupid enough to show that I was…

She blinked curiously at me a few times, before flipping open her notebook and wrote something. She then shows me her message, which turned out to be a question. I sort of expected what she would ask.

"_Do I have to do anything?" _

I smiled as I read it, happy that I was right in guessing her question. It seemed honest, you can't really expect someone to know what to do when asked what I just did. I shook my head for her and told her: "The only thing we need you to do is recognize it as your Fan Club."

She seemed to be thinking about it for a moment. Actually I could careless what the answer is… I just want it over with. She smiled then shrugged her shoulders very slightly that you'd hardly notice it. She then wrote: _"If that's all, I guess… It wouldn't really hurt would it…"_

I read it and smiled. _'Finally it's over.'_ Turned to the girls around us… apparently most of the tables around Konohana-san and Nanto-san are occupied by her Fan Club. With a voice large enough I told the girls: **"Well girls you can worship her all you want now!"**

This caused a lot of girls to scream for joy. About half a classroom's worth of girls rushed from their tables and converged around the table that the two best friends were occupying. They began to happily complement their "idol", praising and squealing for joy, happy to be within 10 feet of the raven haired girl. I was actually a bit jealous of her. _'A tiny bit…'_

The poor girl was a bit overwhelmed by the great number. I suppose she was not expecting them to actually wait for their answer. Maybe I should tell her that this is only half of the lowerclassmen members... in Spica. She'd probably flip if she learned that she at least had more than two classes worth of fans from the other schools too.

Anyway her fans were getting out of hand. The girl was mute now… how can they just throw question after question at her. Really these girls… it's amazing how quickly manners fly away when it's most needed. It was then that a girl spoke up… and not just any girl. It was Konohana, Hikari-san. She had said something… which I didn't catch. But it was enough to provoke a mob of fan girls. I was glad I had moved away as soon as the girls began converging on their table. I wouldn't want to get caught in any cat fights…

I could hear them yelling quite angrily… saying things like.

"Who are you to tell us that?"

"Aren't you the one who's always bothering Yaya-sama!"

"What do you know?!"

And… "You don't deserve Yaya-onee-sama's attention!"

I saw Konohana's face. She looked like she was going to cry… I regret not just making the stupid suggestion now… I even regret doing it. I felt partially responsible for what the girl was going thru. The rage of Fan Girls can't be underestimated I guess. Feeling responsible for her torment, I decided that the right thing to do was help her out.

But before I could do anything a loud banging was heard echoing in the whole cafeteria… All the girls around the two best friends, backed away in fear and surprise. In the middle I saw… Nanto-san, with her hands on the table. She had her eyes closed. I could tell from the way her lip curled that she was clenching her teeth together, to probably hold back the desire to yell at everyone. I could feel her aura; her anger was like burning ice. It almost felt like mana though it was too faint for a mage, but I suppose she had developed it somehow. And although I can see and sense calmness from her, I know she is angry. And I have to admit… quite scary. Even Konohana-san looked terrified.

The girls around them stayed quiet, while shivering in fear. I just hope that they learn the first thing anyone should know about Nanto-san.

After a few minutes, Nanto-san lets out a big disappointed sigh. Her angry face had held the scariest expression I've ever seen in my years changed to disappointment. I watched her pick up her notebook and step away from her seat. She walked over near Konohana-san and takes her hand. The blonde girl was confused when the raven haired girl gestured that they leave immediately.

"Aren't you going too…" Konohana-san was probably going to ask if her friend wanted to at least eat the rest of her food but never did get a chance to finish. Her best friend just shakes her head tugs her hand lightly to make her follow. We watched the two girls leave. None of the Fan Girls dared to stop them, nor start apologizing. Which I think was a good thing for now. I don't think she would have accepted their apology just yet.

As soon as the girls were gone the cafeteria slowly began to return to get noisy from all the girls resuming their conversations, except for a small part of the fan girls namely Sakura and a few other girls. I decided to get back to eating my meal.

Sakura and the other girls then began talking. The one who started the conversation didn't sound like a fan. Or at least not one that knew Nanto-san well enough. Saying: "What happened?... Why did she get so mad?" I wanted to answer her… maybe later… They pondered about it for a while… Sakura kept her mouth shut the whole time, probably unsure if she should tell them that their treatment of their "idol's" best friend.

"You should apologize..." I said before taking another bite out of my meal.

"She's right. If we go talk to Yaya-sama and apologize now she might forgive us." said one girl.

"She might… or might not…" that just slipped out. It seems I have a loose tongue… I have to remedy that or more instances of me making stupid suggestions and paying for it would happen in the future.

"What do you mean? Rin-sempai?" asked another girl.

I felt like toying with their heads for a bit. So I carelessly said: "If you're a Nanto-san's Fan you should know what great wrong you just did."

"We are! But we don't. Would you please tell us?" as soon as the girl said that, the other girls began asking me the same thing. Oddly I expected them to get angry and make a scene like they did with Konohana-san. I thought about it a bit. Giving them the answer might not help them much… well not their IQ anyway. But after a moment or two I decided to just spill it. Let them decide for themselves and get back to class. And maybe apologize myself for getting the two into this mess. But before I could say anything…

"Hikari-sempai… is Yaya-sama's important person." Sakura uttered meekly.

The girls looked shocked realizing for themselves what they had done to cause their idol's anger. They were silent for a while, which gave me time to ponder on Konohana-san's importance to Nanto-san. It's not obvious but if you look deep enough and ponder on it too much, people would get the opinion that the raven haired girl is in love with her own best friend. I have to admire how well she had kept it though. Keeping their friendship so close where she could even joke about the blonde girl being hers without the other taking it seriously enough to even think it might be true.

I then took the time to advice them on what to do. I told them that they should apologize to Konohana-san before apologizing to Nanto-san. I explained that if even if they apologize to Nanto-san, the probability that she'd forgive them is very low. If Konohana-san forgives them their chances of being forgiven would greatly increase.

I was surprised on how little effort on my part managed to convince them to apologize. They were soon talking about where to meet up after classes, where they could find Konohana-san and apologize. I then returned to class and leave them to fend for themselves now...

Back in class I had found it very difficult to keep myself from laughing at Nanto-san's growling stomach, especially since you'd hear a chuckle or snicker somewhere around the class each time her stomach made an impression of an angry animal. I took the time our teacher used to tease Nanto-san about her loud empty belly to look at Konohana-san, who looked concerned and a bit guilty… but I think she's happy as well. I kind of envy this girl for she has such a cool friend. While I'm stuck with girls who apparently cant go a day without seeing their idols…

After classes, I had decided to talk to Nanto-san. I waited her best friend to separated from her before approaching her.

"Nanto-san…" I called.

She turned to me, I expected her to be angry at me for putting her and her best friend in the situation earlier. But instead she just smiled and waved before opening her notebook and writing: _"Ah! Tousaka-san want to join me for some snacks?"_

"Umm… sure." I nodded and followed her to the cafeteria. I found it funny that this girl betrays almost all of my expectations. I thought for sure, she would call me by my given name just then or be angry at me. But then again this could all be a ploy. You can never guess how dangerous people like this girl can be.

She ordered a few sandwiches and some juice while I got myself some tea. We occupied a table somewhere in the corner. I don't understand why she wanted to sit so far out of sight though. But better get it over with…

"Nanto-san. I would like to apologize for what I had put you and your best friend thru earlier."

She opened her notebook again and flipped to a page revealing a big _"OK!"_

"Eh?! That's it? You forgive me?" I asked loudly in surprise.

She just nodded and made a small hand gesture representing her response before digging into her food.

I found myself scratching my head. It was all too easy… so easy it was giving me a headache. I began telling what caused me to ask her to acknowledge her fan club just for the sake of telling her. She just quietly ate and paid attention to what I said. I could tell that she was a good listener. And could almost say that she was quite aware she had a fan club. But if there's one thing I've learned today about Nanto-san… is that she's more surprising than a fire ball spell. After I was done talking she wrote in response; that my action was only a catalyst to the event earlier. I was not completely at fault for causing it.

After that we just talked. Well I did most of the talking, but you'd be surprised to learn that Nanto-san wrote pretty fast. And again I was surprised to learn that the girl had some interest in topics I like… namely sorcery. Even though what she had read were only the things that non-mage families can read our conversation was… interesting. I had fun sharing facts and stories that are usually only known by and told to mages.

It was beginning to get late. We were engrossed by our conversation that I found myself late to head for my own club. But then again at this point going there wouldn't really serve any purpose. It's not like I can't skip attending once in a while. But Nanto-san seemed to have plans… she stood and cleaned up the utensils and dish that she used and turns them in to dishwasher. She then says her goodbye thru her notebook. It was a prewritten goodbye… It was written in big letters and held most of the page. Just like the OK not so long ago.

I gave her my goodbyes and watched her leave the cafeteria. It was too bad really… I was really starting to like her.

_**End of Filler Story 2**_

Author's note: Coincidentally… I had begun writing this filler chapter in Tousaka Rin's point of view even before Ichimaru Wolfram had suggested it. XD I tried getting in her mind except without the Holy Grail war and summoning servants etc. X3


	11. Chapter VII: Amane

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

Author's Notes: This chapter has been slightly revised to deepen Amane's character… or at least the way I'm portraying her. I have to admit that I don't like her that much in the anime and manga. So I've decided on a resolve to write her in a way that'd I might like her… and hope someone Amane haters will too, at least enough not to be bored when I write Amane chapters XD

Btw… has anyone felt that they ever spelled love wrong when they capitalize the "L"? I have…

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 7: Amane: What makes you… you?**

It's been five days since I've seen Nanto-san other than when we're having dinner at the dormitory. And even then the only thing I got from her was a cold glare that said either "I hate you." or "stop looking at me". I still see Hikari as usual, although she did skip coming here once but that's not really a big deal, she does have her own club activities after all. Honestly though, I'm a little worried around and maybe about her. She has told me that she was getting worried about Nanto-san… something about always being out and coming back late, tired and odd smelling. I had decided to investigate about it myself.

I didn't feel like practicing much today, so instead of riding I decided to just pamper Star Bright a bit just so he won't get too upset about not running today. Oh yeah, Hikari won't be watching me today. I believe she told me that today would be one of the Saintly Chorus' practice days, something they had to do to make up for some lost time. I considered paying a visit, but I figure I'll save that trip some other time… when our relationship has developed further.

It took me a moment for my mind to realize that… if Hikari and I got together… I cannot be with Nanto-san. I pondered on that thought for a while and wondered why I thought of it. I must admit… I'm at a loss for having some sort of feelings towards someone else. Not just anyone, this someone was so mysterious and seemingly spiteful to me, which makes me wonder why I even have such feelings.

After a little thought I decided that I will visit Hikari after all. It was still very early, but I guess I can just watch them… I can learn a little more about Hikari this way. I found myself quickly changing back into my school uniform and made my way towards the school. It was closer to the horse riding club than the church and I know that it held a room where the Saintly Chorus practices. I've only passed the room once or twice before, I've never really been there… but now seemed a good time remedy that.

The school's halls were almost empty without any classes. I gather that most of the other students are out going about their business. Some are in their clubrooms, others are in their dormitories, or had gone home. During my trek towards the Saintly Chorus' music room, I found myself recalling the day I had an almost pleasant but very notable encounter with Nanto-san.

I had just woken up from my more or less peaceful slumber… It wasn't the best night of sleep I've had since I came face to face with Nanto-san. I stared at the ceiling; thinking about that raven haired girl… who was rapidly occupying more of my thoughts.

Even now, as faint light of the rising sun was piercing my dream world and rousing me from sleep… It was still with her… I could almost see her long and lavishly, beautiful jet black hair, crystalline like amber eyes, soft sakura pink lips, and silky, soft light colored skin. In my mind I tried making her smile or tried remembering the times she smiled, but I failed… I could only ever see her face looking at me with anger, tears or disinterest. To be quite honest… After having so many people admire me… I am a little bothered that someone seems to dislike me with so much intensity… It's a new and foreign feeling to me, but what's really bothering me is that, why do I find that attractive?

I felt myself release a long empty sigh as I got up from bed and prepared to do my morning duties. It was Sunday, and even now I just can't skip my duties. Maybe I should have taken Natsuki and Shizuru up on their offer to feed and care for Star Bright in my place today. I guess it's too late to regret it now.

It was still around 5am. Star Bright would be expecting me to come over to feed him and ride for a bit. I changed into my rider's uniform and exited my room. From there I made my way to the entrance and was about to head out of the dorm's premises when I saw a familiar black haired girl. She was waving goodbye to some kendo club members who I would assume are from Miator, as Miator is the one who owns a Kendo Club… though it's not impossible for students from other schools to join, just usually never happens…

I found my eyes following her as she moved away from the other girls, and I could have sworn that my mind was so flooded with so many thoughts. Too much actually… _'Oh! Maria-sama…please give me some strength, this girl is making me think too much.' _I prayed for salvation.

My silent prayers were broken as I noticed the raven haired beauty was walking away, I decided to follow her and talk to her. _'No more planning, no more dragging her elsewhere, just talk, and apologize.'_ I told myself, deciding I would not fear rumors and stares of other students… especially not this early in the morning.

I walked after her, I tried calling her… but I felt fear. I was terribly afraid that if I called her she'd get angry at me… or was still angry at me. After a few minutes, I realized that she had not once stopped walking or even looked back behind her. My best guess was that she didn't want to talk to me yet. With that in mind I soon found myself giving up before we could do a second lap around the dormitory. The sun was rising… I'm sure Star Bright would start to worry if I'm not on time to feed him.

Heading out towards the dormitory gates; I found myself instinctively stopping and turning my head to where I last saw Nanto-san. I was surprised to see that where she had stopped walking was approximately a few meters from where she was before I stopped following her. She had her head turned slightly and I could feel her eye watching me. I wondered… _'is she teasing me or something?'_ I didn't know the answer. For all I know she was just making sure I had stopped following her, but a part of me wanted her to tease me, play with my head, and want me to come after her.

I convinced myself that I wanted to try one more time, Star Bright can wait… something is wrong with me… I've never felt this way before… I'm sure he'll understand. I took a step and readied myself to talk to her, but before I could take my second step… she was approached by a group younger of girls. Her attention immediately shifted from me to the younger girls who came to her. I found myself watching them flock around her almost if not exactly like the way girls flock around the Etoile and myself. Hikari never told me Nanto-san was popular… or perhaps she didn't know either. The girls looked so happy, as she conversed with them just using her notebook. I then noticed one of them looking and pointing towards me. I felt very nervous all of a sudden. _'What could they be talking about?'_

I then found my eyes falling on Nanto-san again, and was surprised to learn that she was looking my way again. Her face held a smile but I knew those eyes all to well. How could I not… the image, the emotion was burned into my mind that day… _'She hates me.'_ All I could do was turn away and flee towards the stables like a coward. I felt like crying… but I have no good reason to… or at least I thought I did. No one would understand, heck I didn't even understand it myself. But I dare not look back… This was not the time or place to resolve matters with her.

Star Bright was unusually gentle that day. He did nothing to force my attention to him. I guess he could sense that I wasn't feeling so good… Whatever it was, I felt very thankful to him. The rest was an uneventful morning. Well… nothing special worth mentioning. Just the usual crowd of girls watching me ride, Natsuki's horse was being difficult, and we had too much hay delivered again… nothing new.

I arrived at the Saintly Chorus' club room. I found myself a little frustrated that the room was empty. That meant that I now had to walk all the way to the church to meet with Hikari. I quickly made my way towards the church… but there was really no hurry, it'll be quite a while before clubs end. Then again, I thought that if I got there quickly I might see and learn more of her.

But as I was about to leave the school… I saw her, Nanto-san passed by a hall carrying a box full of… something… I really wasn't sure but it looked a bit heavy. My eyes followed her and I noted that she was headed for the west wing, where most art related classrooms and clubs are held. I wonder if she had noticed me… I wanted to follow her but…

No… there was no buts. I wanted to follow her… and I did. I stalked her by keeping a corner's distance as I followed where she went. I watched her as she entered an art room. I waited somewhere to check if she was just delivering the box there. If I recalled correctly this area was the least populated area of the school especially after classes. Most students from Spica tend to join sports clubs leaving the art and science labs empty and devoid of students by this hour. I realized that she wasn't coming out after a few minutes. I originally thought that she was delivering the box for storage.

Determined to find out what she was doing, I slowly and silently got closer to the door and peered inside. What I saw surprised me, the room was almost empty, like it hadn't been used. It looked clean… at least as far as an art room can be called clean. There were a few desks that had their dusty sheets off and surrounded this one easel, a chair, and painter just beside an open window. I watched as the soft wind caused the plain white curtains to flutter and the sun's light halfway near its journey's end, entering the room and leaving a warm glow on the painter's features.

At that moment, I knew that my heart was a captive… of Nanto Yaya. Although it was probably for the wrong reasons... I couldn't deny it any longer. When I saw her sad eyes as she stared almost blankly at what she was painting on her canvas, it made me feel sad as well. She looked like she was in so much pain, so much that I felt guilty… almost like I was the one who caused it.

She gently placed her brush down and tiredly, slumped down on her chair. She looked up and gazed at the ceiling, I could feel it… her sadness turning to anger. She kicked one of the desks from where she sat. It flew a good few feet towards my direction and spilling a few paint tubes and her sketchbook onto the floor. By pure accident sketchbook flips open and I find myself staring at the well drawn picture she had sketched. What she had drawn made my eyes open wide in surprise. There in white and gray was the familiarly, soft smiling face of… Hikari.

Another loud noise came startling me out of my discovery as I turned to see that she had stood up and kicked her easel and canvas which caused it to crash and fall somewhere near where I stood. It landed right side up and one could see what she had painted. Again… to my surprise it was… beautiful, as if it was made by a professional artist. It had a few blotches of paint where the wet streams streaked and tainted the picture… most likely because of the kick. But… it was beautiful painting of an angel who looked like she was singing and her song making her shine in the darkness. It took me a moment to realize it was Hikari that she had depicted as such a lovely angel. There was no mistaking that soft blonde hair, loving blue eyes, and the way that her lips curled when she's happy as she sings. It was indeed Hikari, in all her dazzling beauty, charm and love, that she had captured on the now paint stained canvas.

I instantly felt very jealous… like a hole suddenly appeared in my heart. It was at that moment that I realized why she hated me so much, why I felt so guilty whenever I saw her sad, and why I felt jealous. _'She loves Hikari.'_

I was startled out of my revelation when I heard more kicks and crashes. My gaze went from the slightly ruined painting to the raging, raven haired girl. I watched her kick some old desks, chairs and boxes. She was screaming and crying as she did and though silent as it was, I could almost hear her scream her heart out…

'SHIT!' I watched her kick a really old desk,

'Amane...' an old single metal toolbox,

'I…' a box full of used paint cans,

'….absolutely…' a chair,

'…HATE YOU!!!' and another desk.

She took a few steps back and ended up with her back on the empty chalkboard. She was crying freely, I could see her tears streaming from her reddening eyes from where I stood.

I was astonished to learn that she wasn't done quite yet. She closed her left hand into a fist, and rolled right to her right and punched the old and dusty board as hard as she could. It caused the board to bend and break a little, but it was the sound that it had caused that made me worry and wonder if anyone else had heard it.

But somehow that concern escaped me as soon as it came. I continued to watch her cry. Her head was leaning on the old board as she slammed her fists over and over again, slowly loosing strength each time she did. She slowly slumped down dragging her nails along the old board creating the painful screeching sound that I'm sure anyone hated hearing. A minute later, she was on the floor sitting on her legs as she held herself up from the floor with her arms.

It was then that I thought. _'I've seen enough…'_ I felt the desperate need to comfort her. It's was… after all… my fault that she was crying.

I slowly opened the door as quietly as I could… she either ignored it or didn't notice and continued crying. I didn't speak… I just walked towards her; slow enough for her to take notice of my presence, careful enough not to trip on anything, and quiet enough not to cause her panic. I took a moment to look around and check the mess that she hand made; a few of the old desks where almost broken in half and had a lot of fragments lying around here and there, the old toolbox had been dented, cans scattered here and there, a chair lay on top of a broken desk with a leg broken, the easel and canvas was spared from being hit by a few open paint tubes, and her paint brushes some of which were broken in two when she might have stepped on them lay here and there.

I then kneeled beside her and placed a hand on her shoulder and called out her name as gentle as I could. "Nanto-san." Her body almost jumped in surprise when she heard my voice. She slowly turned her head towards me to check if I was who she thought I was. Our eyes met and my blood almost froze when I saw the feeling from her eyes turn from hurt to rage in mere seconds. It was gut wrenching… it almost felt like it was my body that she had kicked and punched earlier.

She shrugged off my hand and tried to stand and walk away, but I couldn't just let her go… "Please wait..." I took her hand pulled her towards me. She must have been exhausted, because she fell back towards me almost effortlessly. I immediately wrapped my arms around her from behind so that she couldn't make her escape. She struggled, kicked, and even drove her elbow at my sides, but I continued to hold her tightly.

If she had her voice she'd probably be screaming; "Let me go!" or "Get you're hands off me!" or maybe even… "I hate you! Everything's your fault."

"I'm sorry." I told her, drawing out any and all remorseful feelings and letting them out in these words. I repeated them almost like a chant, hoping that it would soothe her anger. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

After a minute… she did calm down. She was still crying but had at least stopped thrashing around, trying to free herself and hurt me in the process. I turned her towards myself and hugged her as tightly and gently as possible. She lost the will the stand and was completely leaning on me for support. She cried on her hands, while griping the vest of my uniform as her body shivered like all her warmth was being drained from her.

"I'm very sorry, Nanto-san," I apologize as I gently brushed her hair, trying to console her and desperately hoping she was listening to me. "I know, we didn't really meet in the best of terms, and at a point, I knew that you hated me." I felt her body stiffen and her grip tighten hearing that. "But I didn't know why. It tore me apart. You wouldn't believe how much sleep I've lost from thinking too much. And now I think I do." I could feel her tears seeping deep into the breast part of my uniform.

"You love Hikari… don't you?" I felt one of her hands release my uniform and watched it balled up into a fist. She pounded it on my chest; once, twice, five… maybe ten. Each one grew weaker and slower. Yet to me, each blow felt strong and painful. "I'm very sorry…"

She answered by shaking her head slowly, almost pretending to just wipe the tears out of her eyes. "You were probably thinking; that if only I wasn't here, you would probably have a better shot at winning her affections." I felt her jerk a little. _'A guilty or sad laugh'_ was my guesses.

"If it's any consolation… I think you held yourself pretty well around Hikari, for you to have held in your love for her and your hate towards me for this long without her suspecting… It must have been painful to fall in love with someone who loves someone else." She began crying harder again. Her breaths were almost painfully short and fast. At that moment, I felt it too… the pain of loving someone who didn't love you. Probably not as deeply and painfully as the girl in my arms did, but it was there. It probably didn't feel that painful because, I had someone else that I also liked… and probably, just probably… my love wasn't as deep as hers or it wasn't even love at all. But I wanted to, at least if only for a moment, show her what I felt for her.

I brushed her hair gently and drew it behind her ear. Doing this as I gently poised my right hand to gently cup her face. I held her like that for a moment, savoring how close she was to me. I took in as much as I could; she smelled like paint, some dust, and lilac flowers, her sad teary eyes glowed like a rainy sunset and her long black hair was as soft and smooth as satin.

I continued to move my hand lower and caressing her cheek. Taking the time to wipe away some of her tears before leading my hand under her chin. Gently pushing up I made her face rise to meet mine. Her eyes then closed, probably not wanting to look at me. I leaned closer and closer.

My lips just inches away from hers. I then whispered to her; "I like you… please… forgive me…" before capturing her lips in a kiss and closed my eyes to savor the moment. I felt her stiffen and struggle. But fortunately, I was stronger and was able to hold on to her, keeping her from breaking the kiss. After a moment she stopped struggling and allowed me to kiss her. I could taste her salty tears as they accidentally fell in between our lips. Her lips felt a bit dry and there was a trace of blood from what little saliva I could get from her. I opened my eyes and saw her teary eyes closed, and the skin around them a little red and swollen. She had an aura of surrender. She didn't accept my feelings; she just let me kiss her. She didn't return it nor did she make any attempt to stop me anymore. She just continued to cry as I kissed her and held her in my arms.

After what seemed like an eternity for me, I decided to end the kiss and slowly broke away from her lips. She turned her head to her right and bowed, not wanting to look at me. I gently lowered the both of us to sit on the floor. She gave off a feeling of humiliation, as painful as it was for me… I couldn't help but feel that I might have disgraced her. A kiss isn't always just a kiss after all… and it could have been her first, like mine.

"I'm sorry. Was that your first kiss Nanto-san?" I asked her sadly and apologetic. She shook her head and honestly I was surprised, maybe even a bit disappointed... It was mine, but I dared not tell her because probably in the back of my mind I hoped that I kissed her well enough to hide the fact that. And maybe I felt that knowing that it was my first kiss would somehow affect her badly. "I see…"

I had let her go… she sat on her behind, with her legs to each side and with one arm on the floor and the other holding the elbow of the arm that supported her weight with her head bowed down looking at the floor. Her tears hit the dry floor… a painful sight to watch. Especially since I knew just how strong and proud she stood everyday… seeing her like this just breaks me.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted you to know how I feel…" I saw her eyes widen when she heard me say that, but she didn't dare look at me. I saw her bite her lip hard enough to draw blood, some of which dripped down onto the floor mixing with her tears.

"I'm not breaking it up with Hikari. I mean... I really like Hikari." I saw her tremble a bit. "And I have to take honor your feelings too… to take care of her like you would and never make her cry." I saw the tiniest smile crept up her lip before she nodded.

She then reached for a piece of coal pastel that a few feet from her and wrote; _"I'll kill you if you break her heart."_ on a piece of wood that was probably from one of the broken desks.

I smiled and nervously giggled at that and said; "I promise to give my life to you if ever I do."

She raised her right hand and used her pinky finger to wipe some of the blood from her lip. She raised it in front of me and looked at me straight in the eye. Her amber eyes stilled glowed like the dusk sun and held a tiny bit of anger, but somehow I felt that she didn't hate me or at least not as much as she did earlier. Her eyes were completely serious; I could tell… she will kill me if I break my promise. My eyes fell on to the bloodied pinky, her hand rolled into a fist except for the bloody finger. It was an invitation to a "pinky swear", a very serious one… it was a blood oath.

In response I too bit my lip enough to draw some blood. I wiped it off with my right hand and pinky, reached out and clasped her pinking with mine. We shook them, up and down a few times before letting go.

I watched her smile sadly and stand up. She wiped her tears and blood off her face with the sleeves of her uniform before dusting herself a bit. I stood up too, taking out a hanky from my vest pocket to wipe the blood off my finger and lip.

She turned her back at me and took a deep audible breath to calm herself. She then proceeded to clean the place up, starting with picking up the few things that didn't break into two or more pieces. I decided to help and tried to pick up whatever it was close to me. To my surprise she comes close to me and holds my wrist just as I was to reach for a few tubes of paint. I raised my head to look at her. She just looked at me with a vague expression and shook her head.

"I can help." I told her, but she just forced a smile and shook her head again. She then tugged my arm, motioning towards the door.

"Are you sure? If we do it together we could be done much faster." I told her, trying to convince her to accept my help.

But she just shook her head and let go of my arm. She then picked up the coal pastel again and a piece of the torn box that probably used to hold the empty pain cans, and wrote something on it. She hands the piece of the old box which said; _"Get out already, aren't you supposed to be somewhere else?"_

I couldn't help but smile at how dedicated she was to keeping Hikari happy. While here I was confessing my untrue feelings to the best friend of the girl I am dating not to mention kissing said girl. _'I'm such an idiot.'_ I thought as I nodded and said goodbye. To which she responded by not looking at me and waving her hand in a way that yelled "Shoo!". I took one last look at this strong girl in admiring how… beautiful she was despite everything that happened and everything that had dirtied her.

It was then that I thought; 'Somehow… someday... I'll find a way to make her happy too.' I turned left her alone there and headed for the church.

But before that, I decided to take a small detour. A short trip to the washroom and make myself a bit more presentable. I didn't look like myself when I looked at the mirror. My clothes were quite wrinkled, dusty and had few drops of dry black paint or may that coal pastel… I looked like I had been in a fight, which wasn't that far from the truth. I thought of going back to the horse riding club room and get my riding uniform, but in the end I decided it was too much trouble and headed of to the church to look for Hikari.

I had passed a few students on the way, some of them wearing the Saintly Chorus robes. They greeted me and smiled as they passed me. I took note of the young pink haired girl that Hikari and I saw out with Nanto-san last Saturday. I smiled thinking that I wouldn't have to wait for Hikari and maybe we could meet somewhere on the way.

I reached the church grounds but so far no Hikari. I entered and saw the church empty, except for one girl sitting on the church bench. Walking towards her, I was surprised that she had not noticed my presence. After all, the church floor does tend to make one's feet echo especially when it's empty like it is now. I arrived by her side and placed my hand on her shoulder.

"**YAAAAAAAAAA!!!"** she screamed and jumped away in surprise. I almost laughed, finding her reaction was so cute.

"Hikari. It's just me" I told her. She turns to me and her eyes widen in surprise… she had probably not expected me to visit her and neither did I, until today. She looked at me from top to bottom. I feared that she'd ask about my clothes being so wrinkled and dirty.

She just blushed and apologized to me, squeaking in a sorrowful tone; "I'm sorry sempai. I was deep in thought."

"It's quite alright Hikari. I'm sorry for sneaking up on you." I took of my hand from her shoulder and sat myself beside her. "What were you thinking so deeply about Hikari?" I asked as smiled at her.

She looked like she was pondering on what to say. It made me think that it might be something she wasn't ready to discuss with me. She frowns a bit, maybe unconsciously. She then softly says; "It's nothing…" she pauses. I kept silent as I noticed her lips hanged opened, daring to say that something in her mind. "… it's just that, I've been noticing more and more of Yaya-chan."

'_Nanto-san?!'_ My mind screamed, just because I wasn't going after her anymore didn't mean I wasn't the least bit interested to hear about her. I listened carefully and dared not miss a word.

"It's funny actually. We've been together for over a year now. But I'm beginning to realize just how little I know about her." I looked at her, reading the soft sad smile on her lips and heard the lonely tone of her voice. "This afternoon, a girl approached Yaya-chan with a question. She asked if Yaya-chan would be willing to acknowledge her fan club…" She paused again, the smile from her lips disappeared. "I never realized how popular she was." She looked down to the floor and stared emptily at old marbled floor.

It made me wonder what she really was thinking. Was she starting to fall for her best friend? Or was she jealous of her popularity...? I doubt it though. The first one though I can relate to, I let out a smile and patted her shoulder before jestingly saying; "Well she is quite attractive, Hikari."

"Eh...?" She blushed and looked down. I could immediately tell that something that involved the raven haired girl bothered Hikari. 'Could she actually be starting to have feelings for her?' Some how that thought scared me… more than the way Nanto-san looked at me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I decided to ask her out of concern, but of what… was currently beyond my understanding. I watched as this blonde girl's blush grew a bit darker before she shook her head in response. I nodded and said; "ok." and dropped the subject. To be honest, I was… scared of a lot of things; That Hikari might like her best friend, that what I've done to Nanto-san would be revealed to her, or that all the time I've wasted trying to figure out Nanto-san had a bad effect on Hikari.

Somehow I managed pushed those thoughts away from my mind… We sat there in silence, simply enjoying each other's company. I was looking around the church while we sat, hoping I could do something to spark a conversation. I felt like I was being watched, I seemed to be sensitive towards that, by someone close. I turned and saw Hikari staring at me with a bewildered expression. "Is something wrong, Hikari?"

"Um… Sempai? Why is your uniform all wrinkly and dirty?" She asked something that I had forgotten to dread. I couldn't very well tell her that it was because I was trying to calm and talk to her best friend, but at the same time I don't want to lie to this sweet girl. I decided to answer her more or less truthfully while sparing some details.

"Ah… A friend badly needed to vent out some deep and pent up emotions. I was concerned that she might hurt herself and tried to calm her down. I guess it turned into a little rough housing." I told her and tried my best to let out a small laugh.

"I see…" she looked a bit worried and pointed at something at the lower part of my vest. "Did she go to the clinic? That looks like a quite a bit of blood?" I looked down and saw some really bad blood stains, something I had missed seeing earlier or thought that it was some paint. I froze for a while. To be honest, I was torn between pretending it was just some rough housing with the other party being ok, and just blowing off my cover of having a small confrontation with Nanto-san.

I was out of it for a while and it took me a few moments to realize that Hikari had been calling for me. "Amane-sempai?"

"Ah… I'm sorry Hikari... I felt a little worried that's all." It was a pathetic and stupid excuse no matter how true it was.

"That's ok sempai. Do you want to check if she got to the clinic?" she asked trying to be thoughtful of my concerns.

I smiled. Her sweetness and concern calms me down somewhat. "Thank you, Hikari. But I don't think she'd appreciate seeing my face anytime soon." I lightly laughed at that, I seriously thought it was funny when I imagined her face seeing me checking up on her in the clinic. Yet at the same time, I was seriously troubled and scared of what she'd do to me if I did check up on her and she learns I left Hikari alone…

… Er… it's just too scary to imagine. "I think that she'll be fine though… she's pretty strong here." I said as I tapped the space above my heart. It was my complement to the girl who I will now call Yaya or Nanto-sama. I felt that I owed her a lot, so much actually that I don't think I can ever repay her.

We couldn't think of anything to talk about after that or maybe we were both exhausted, I know I was… physically, mentally and maybe even emotionally. She decided to return to the dorms and get some rest before dinner. I on the other hand decided to check up on Nanto-san after all, maybe even help her finish cleaning up… I doubt that she's finished.

The art room she was in a while ago was now clean and almost empty. There weren't any traces of our previous transgression. The girl that I was expecting to be there wasn't, and seeing what the classroom looked like now made me consider that she might have some sort of cleaning talent too. Everything was back in place except for a few missing desk and chairs, most likely the ones the dark haired girl had broken. Her easel and canvas stood near an open window, covered with a thick white sheet to protect it from dust. The floor looked like it had been mopped and there was barely anymore dust on the floor. I was surprised on how fast she was able to clean all that mess. I found myself approaching the easel. I wanted to see the angel's painting once more. My hand was already on the sheet when I heard someone enter the room.

I loud scream came after. **"AH!? SEMPAI! DON'T!" **and I found a long pink haired girl rushing and putting herself between myself and the painting.

"Eh?" was all that came out of my mouth. I recognized the girl immediately as she was the same girl I passed earlier and the very same one with Nanto-san almost a week ago. She was no longer in her Saintly Chorus robe; instead she wore the freshman's uniform. She looked at me, a bit angry, rudely and a bit accusingly.

"Sempai! It's rude to look at someone's painting without their permission." She scolded me making me let go of the sheet.

"I'm sorry. I seemed to have forgotten my manners." I apologized.

She didn't look like she bought it as she still looked quite angry at me. But she let me off the hook saying something nearly audible about _'as long as you understand'_. She picked the canvas and easel up while it was still covered then moved it more inside the classroom somewhere away from the windows and doors.

"Have you seen Nanto-sama?" I asked her.

She turned to me a little surprised. "She went back to the dorm… How did you know she was here?"

"I saw her walk in here earlier while I was looking for the Saintly Chorus." I told her.

She looked satisfied with my answer and resumed cleaning the room a little more. I wondered why she was cleaning up someone else's mess. That thought made me worry about Nanto-san a bit more. And if anyone asked directly I wouldn't probably be able to deny it. That same thought also seemed to be the answer… I recalled the last things I said to the raven haired girl before she made me leave.

'_I can help…'_ I didn't say that because I merely could. I said it because I wanted to help her. Maybe this girl felt the same.

"Can I help?" I asked her.

While she continued to mop the rest of the room, she answered; "It's okay. I'm almost done, sempai." Her reply sounded a bit like Nanto-sama's, the way how it stung and told me that she wasn't particularly fond of me.

"Hmmm…" I absently vibrated my throat in acknowledgement to her response. I watched her, smiling as she did her job as if she enjoyed it. I thought; _'people can't have everything and everyone they desire after all...'_

"Is something wrong sempai?" she asked pausing in her task and looking at me curiously.

I smiled and replied; "I don't think it's anything I should worry about anymore." I then turned and walked towards the door, but just before I left I turned to her again and said; "Take good care of her, ok?"

The girl turned as pink as her hair and yelled slightly; **"Wha-Wha-What are you talking about?!! Why would I want to take care of Yaya-sempai!?"** She turned away from me with a pout. I decided to leave it at that, and get into some fresh clothes, before someone I wouldn't want to answer to finds me in this blood stained uniform.

That night… I found Hikari at her usual table. She was with a few unfamiliar Spica students, or should I say they weren't the same ones that usually sit beside her. But someone's absence made me worry more… Nanto-sama wasn't beside her best friend for dinner. Actually she wasn't anywhere in the dinning hall. I wonder if something did happen to her…

… _**to be continued.**_

_**Please Review!!!**_

_**Author's Notes:**_ Again, I'm sorry for the delay. It took a while for me to get the inspiration to continue this story. But at least two other stories came out huh? XD And I made an extra long chapter. About more than 6000 words! Yey me! I'm actually surprised I made Amane kiss Yaya… I planned to do that on the next chapter Amane narrates but somehow this happened.

Anyway… The next chapter fic would probably be in Yaya's point of view that or I might include a short filler in between, for a bit of comedy after that all the drama nearly burned my heart... (I have this habit of almost acting out what I plan to write before it get's written.)

I'm also considering pausing this and writing the non-character narrative version. As well as, I'm working on a Tamao x Nagisa fic. I'm testing a theory of getting more reviews if I write a fic with Nagisa in it. (I'm jealous of someone! For getting 40 reviews in just 5 chapters. XD) And several other Yaya x ? pairings other than Hikari.

I'm going to work harder! XD _**Gambarimasu!**_


	12. Chapter VIII: Hikari

Disclamier: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

**Author's Notes:** Yeah it's a little later than I wanted to post it. But I have some excuses XD (none of them are good but still are excuses XD) I know I said that Yaya was next but a strike of inspiration came and Hikari's turn came up first.

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

**_Please Review!!!_**

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 8: Hikari: What do I do?**

It's Saturday morning and I have just returned to my room from breakfast. I laid down on my bed, oddly feeling tired. I admit that I'm no morning person, it took me three or four months before I got used to getting up on my own so that I didn't need Yaya-chan to wake me up every morning. But that wasn't the reason I felt tired.

We barely get to talk lately. I was worried when I saw her in her bed, sleeping early again last Thursday night and with a light fever and a lot of band-aids on her hands. She was well enough to attend class the next morning… I wanted to talk to her later that night but… the last I saw of her was after classes when we split up as I headed to choir practice. When I returned to our room, I found a letter addressed to me. I soon discovered that it was from Yaya-chan. I slowly opened the envelope, almost dreading to read the letter's contents. But, when I found myself holding the unfolded paper, with its contents plain for my eyes to see, I decided to read it… after I took one deep nervous breath. It read:

_Hikari, _

_ I'm going out for the weekend. Please don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I'll be back either by Sunday night or in time for class on Monday. Have a pleasant weekend! I'll try to bring souvenirs! _

_p.s. could you roll my thick blanket and put it in my place on the bed before night fall. Just in case the sister comes to check on us at night._

_-Yaya_

I was relieved at first to know that she had remembered to write a letter. She tends to sneak out of school and do this outing of hers every once in a while. She would be gone for a day, two or the weekend. She'd bring back with her a lot random souvenirs and share it with me and sometimes the class. And most times, she'll come back looking really refreshed and cheerier than when she had left. She's always invited me to come with her before, she always did, even though she knew I would always say that I didn't want to sneak out because my parents would get mad if they found out. It was always a valid excuse, my parents were very protective and strict about things like this. But oddly she didn't invite me this time.

And now, here I am… on my bed… staring at the letter she wrote to me. And wondering why, I feel so left out that she didn't bother trying to invite me this time. … I might have just said; "yes..."

I sat up and looked at Yaya-chan's side of the room. I could almost see her there; Sleeping on her bed, studying on her desk, drawing while leaning on the wall, singing while sitting on the floor, or just simply smiling at me as she cheers me up. All of which are only but a hand full of my memories of my best friend. I can't believe she's been missing for less than a day, but I miss her already. What's wrong with me?

Looking out the window, I recalled that I didn't have plans today. I didn't make any… not even with Amane-sempai. Actually it's not that I didn't make any. It's more like my plans were ruined because the person I wanted and had planned to spend time with had her own plans and disappeared before I had the chance to invite her to do anything. I let out a deep sad sigh.

I wanted to talk to someone. _'But who could I talk to?...'_ I pondered on that thought for a while and remembered two people who might actually be able to help me. They're somewhat involved in this already, when they helped Yaya-chan and I get together and make up. And although they're not classmates nor were they st. Spica's students, they're really good friends. I got up from my bed and took out a can of my favorite imported biscuits, that my sister had sent me, from our small room pantry and headed out the door.

Minutes later… I was outside their room, on the second floor of the Miator side of the dorm building. I knocked nervously, having second thoughts about my sudden visit. But before I could decide on fleeing the door opens revealing a blue haired girl, in her loose blue pajamas and a white head band that had something written on it. She looked at me with a happy surprised face and said;

"Hikari-chan! Good Morning!"

"Good Morning. Tamao-san." I greeted back, trying to be as cheerful as I can while still in a semi public area. She might have noticed it, I don't know for sure… but I always tend to think that she's the type that catches on quickly to hidden signals, even if they're unconsciously done. I don't really know how she does it, but sometimes I can tell when she does.

She smiles and asks me to come in. I happily thanked her and entered. I noticed that Nagisa-chan wasn't in the room, but that's ok. She asked me to take a seat on her bed, to which I nodded and sat down. I noticed that she was working on something.

"Were you doing your homework, Tamao-san?" I asked, curious if I'm bothering her.

She smiled and showed me what it was. "I'm working on the script, Rokujou-sama asked me to write for the play."

I was surprised when I remembered it. It was discussed at dinner a few nights ago. "I'm sorry! I must be bothering you. Maybe I should go." I said as I stood up from the bed.

Tamao-chan giggles to my surprise and wonder. "It's alright! Hikari-chan. I was having a little writer's block anyway. I could use a short break and some biscuits." She pointed at the thing in my hands.

I looked down and remembered that I had brought the box of biscuits with me. And with a silly smile I handed it to her before taking my seat on her bed again. She headed to the side of the room where there was a small pantry and an electric water heater where she began to make some tea for us.

"So what do I owe this surprise visit?" She asked me as she was mixing a few tea leaves together.

"I was wondering if you could give me some advice…" I replied.

She curiously looked at me for a moment, before she said; "I think Yaya-san knows you a lot better, and would know what to tell you better than I could." And looked back to what she was doing so as not to burn herself.

I looked away from her for a moment, my gaze fell on to Nagisa-chan's bed… which coincidentally was on the same side as Yaya-chan's. It reminded me of times she sat there as we had our occasional tea parties here with everyone. "That's a bit of the problem…"

She placed a plate of the biscuits on the desk and offered me a cup.

She said; "Oh? How so? I hear that she could communicate quite well even with just a pen and paper." Before pouring herself a cup.

I looked down on the golden brown steaming hot liquid and told her; "That's not quite what I mean… she's also not here at the moment and she's part of what I need advice on."

"I see…" I hear her place her cup down on her desk. I turned to see that she had opened her drawer and took what seems to be a plastic sign that said; "Do not Disturb". She stands and headed to open the door, on which quickly hangs the piece of plastic on the door knob and closes it again. She pulls up her chair closer to me, sits down and asks with a reassuring smile; "So… what's wrong?"

I gave myself a few moments to get my thoughts in order. "I feel like Yaya-chan and I… I mean… I feel like our friendship isn't like what it used to be..." I then decided to ask her; "Tamao-san? Did Yaya-chan tell you anything before we were able to make up?"

She seemed surprised that I asked that and asked me with some curiously as to why I asked. I told her; "I would like to know…" I paused and waited for her to tell me or simply respond, but she didn't. I decided to try to convince her to. "You might have noticed that though Yaya-chan seems very open, confrontational, loud and touchy… she also keeps to herself."

"Are you saying that she keeps secrets from you?" Tamao-san asks, before taking a sip of her tea.

"It's not that she keeps it from me. But I guess you can say that…" I paused to look towards the window and try to see what was outside. It was something to help me gather my thoughts. "Yaya-chan has this way of telling people things to satisfy their curiosity, and sometimes without actually telling them everything."

"… that's true…" said Tamao-san as she place her cup of tea down. "… although at first look, Yaya-san certainly doesn't seem like the type of person."

"…" I felt silent, and took a biscuit but I didn't bite it yet… I just stared at it, gazing upon the brownness of the biscuit and the sugar that formed a glazed look on it.

"Yaya-san told me…" Tamao-san paused. I looked at her, happy that she finally decided to answer my question.

"…That you wouldn't come." Her works hit me like a hard slap.

"Eh?" I muttered almost absently.

Tamao-san frowned and looked at me straight in the eye. "This is what she said to me in the back of the church and I quote; "Hikari won't come. There's no way she'll come here. Hikari… no longer remembers this place, because… she has a more precious place. And now, I'm no longer her best friend. Because I ruined our friendship." end quote. She sounded quite angry at herself to me, like she was blaming herself very deeply for what she had done."

"…" I couldn't say anything after learning what Yaya-chan and how she had said it. Learning how angry, sad and hopeless she felt of our breaking friendship troubled me. It was also painful for me to learn that she was so saddened that she'd think I would forget the place we had first met. And it brought back memories of the entranced kiss she gave me that night I came back from the beach with Amane-sempai.

The warmth and forcefulness of her touch, the glow of her amber eyes, the softness of her lips and the slippery yet sticky liquid that dared enter my lips from hers. I can almost feel it as I remember… that night she had just given done that to me.

When I returned to our room I greeted her quite openly with a harm hug. I was happy and grateful to her for rescuing me from Kenjo-sempai that afternoon. I was presenting to her a Sakura shell I found on the beach, a small token of my deep appreciation for what she had done for me. She looked happy when I gave it to her… but something happened.

… All of a sudden, the look from her eyes changed. She appeared serious all of a sudden; she held me arms tightly and pulled me closer to her. And before I knew it… she was kissing me. I was shocked. And needless to say I felt hurt and confused. I struggled but Yaya was stronger than me.

She slowly pushed forward, and I ended up cornered with the door behind me. It was then that everything turns for the worse. She began touching me in places I rather not mention. At that point, I felt that I had to get her of me. I pushed her away as hard as I could and screamed; "NO!". She fell on the floor a few feet from me.

I cried and wrapped my arms around myself. I somehow muttered absently, asking her why she did that… but in the end I just cried and didn't give her any chance to explain.

"-chan…?"

I noticed a hand waving in front of me and a voice that called; "Hikari-chan?" I turned to see Tamao-san looking at me rather worriedly.

"Ah! I'm sorry Tamao-san… I spaced out for a bit." I blushed and apologized to her.

She smiles and shakes her head telling me it was ok. "So… might I ask what it was that Yaya-san did?"

I looked away and pondered if I should tell her.

She then told me in a gentle comforting voice; "You don't have to tell me Hikari-chan, I can understand that there are things people have to forget some time in their lives… It's sometimes necessary too, so that one can move on, look forward and be or try happy."

Her words rang in my head… they felt like heavy chains in my heart… and I'm not quite sure why. However I felt that I will know if I told her what it was that Yaya did.

I shook my head and looked at her. "She… she…" I found it hard to say. I swallowed, trying to get rid of the anxiety I felt about the subject.

"Yaya-chan… she… kissed me." I muttered.

I turned my attention back to Tamao-san who remained very quiet before and after I've revealed it to her. I wasn't so surprise that she looked very shocked with her mouth wide agape. Which made me wonder if it was that unbelievable?...

"Tamao-san?" I called to her.

A silly sounding "Huh?" was her only response to my calls. She regained her composure after a while and apologized for spacing out.

"Yaya-san, has kissed you huh…" she mumbled as she held her chin with her right hand. She seemed to be thinking about something and absently added surgar and stirred her liquid less tea cup. I took it upon myself to pour her some tea before she decides to drink the sugar as it is.

"Ah!… Thank you…" she said as she realized what I did for her.

"You're welcome…" I told her and looked at her a little concerned. I felt like I was really bothering her. She's busy at this time and she probably has her own problems to think of and doesn't need me to make the burden heavier. I almost wanted to leave and ask her to forget about it… but, I guess… in a way I'm getting pretty desperate to understand these things. And to the point I have to selfishly bother another person.

"Hikari-chan?" she called me. She sounded like she had gotten her thoughts in order, I turned to her to see what she has to say. "What do you feel about Yaya-san?"

"What I feel about her?" I asked, wondering why she asked such a question.

"Yes, if you could please be as deeply and honest as possible. I can only truly tell you what to do once I know." She sounded absolutely serious. I found it strange talking to Tamao-san, without a smile on her face. She's usually a happy and cheerful person… like… like Yaya-chan.

My gaze move onto Nagisa-chan's bed, just being on that side was enough to remind of Yaya-chan. Her smile, her playfulness, her protectiveness, her possessiveness… but there's one thing I found hard to remember. "… She's my best friend and I'm very thankful to her. She's been with me for over a year and we've been very close. In that time she's protected me, encouraged me, and kept me smiling. She's very important to me."

"…" I hear Tamao-san place down her cup and sighs deeply. "This will be harder than I thought…" she refills her cup and looks. It was then that her eyes opened wide as if she was struck by inspiration. "How about… Amane-sama? What do you feel about her?" she asks before nibbling on another piece of biscuit.

"Amane-sempai?..." I blushed and looked down the floor. I was somehow able to mumble; "I like sempai…" and hope that answered her question.

"What do you like about her?" she followed.

It didn't take me too long to think about it. "She's cool and beautiful…"

"Is that it?" She asked in a rather inquisitive tone.

"It's not… Sempai… she makes me smile, she encourages me and she protects me."

I was surprised to hear Tamao-san laugh softly. I felt a little insulted because I didn't tell her my feelings for Amane just so she could laugh. I pouted a little. "What's so funny?"

Tamao-san wipes a tear from her eye and tries to stop laughing… "Hehe… I'm sorry… I didn't… haha… mean to…"

I drank my tea while I waited for her to stop laughing. I could feel my cheeks warm up, in embarrassment and maybe a little bit in anger.

She picks up her tea cup and takes another sip after she had stopped laughing. She apologized again for laughing. I told her it's fine, but asked her to enlighten me as to what she had found funny. To my surprise, she returns to a somewhat serious façade. "You know… although there are a few things that you didn't mention… did you realize that you had just described things about Yaya-san?" she suddenly followed.

"Eh?!" I was shocked at the revelation, stunned even. In my mind I thought of the things I'd say about Yaya-chan and Amane-sempai. It didn't take me long to realize that though there were differences… a lot of the things I liked about Amane-sempai, where Yaya-chan's traits too.

I felt two hands hold on to my shoulders. I looked up was caught into Tamao-san gaze "I'll be frank now, Hikari…" She stared deep into my eyes, in a way that I couldn't dare look away. "Do you think you might like Yaya-san in the same way you like Amane-sama?"

I just stared at her, trying to make sense of the question. And making sure I didn't hear her wrong. Our gazes were locked, but I didn't see who it was in front of me. Instead my mind flashed memories of Amane-sempai and Yaya-chan. My heart ached… it felt like it was being ripped in two. I know that I liked Amane-sempai… but… I couldn't tell myself what it was I felt for my best friend.

"I'm sorry… Hikari." Tamao apologized, her voiced sounded very apologetic and worried about something.

I felt something drop onto my hand. "Huh?" I looked down and saw a drop of liquid, a tear drop to be exact from my hand. Realizing I was crying my only reaction was to try and wipe the tears away.

"Hikari…"

"…" I was silent for a while. Tears flowed and the agonizing pain filled my heart. _'Why is it so painful.'_ I asked myself…

"Hikari?"

"I'm not sure… I'm not sure what to feel…" was the last thing I could say, before I broke down and cried. I felt Tamao-san arms move down to pull me closer and hugged me gently to try and comfort me.

I don't know how long I cried. I felt so horrible and confused. My thoughts jumped from Amane-sempai to Yaya-chan and back and forth… to almost no end. _'Why me?... Why did I?'_

I could feel someone warmly hugging me and brushing my hair… And image formed and I recall that Yaya-chan does this for me. "…Yaya-chan." Mumbled and gave the one hugging me a tight hug.

"I'm sorry to say this Hikari-chan, but I'm Tamao." I heard the person say. Looking up, I realized that it was actually Tamao-san. It then occurred to me that I had almost forgotten why I was here… or should I say, I had forgotten it for a moment. I blushed and immediately let go of Tamao-san, apologizing for my odd actions.

I was quiet for a bit. My host decided to use that time to clear up the tea cups and left over biscuits that we didn't feel like finishing anymore.

"Tamao-san, what should I do?" I asked her in a depressed voice.

"It's more on what you want to do." She told me without looking away from the things she was washing.

"What do you mean?" I asked her, not really sure how to make sense of what she meant by that.

"Lets see… At the moment you have a rather interesting choice to make." She looked at me for a second but resumed to washing the used tea cups and plates. "You can either; forget about the whole thing about Yaya-san and continue as you have been with Amane-sama… or you can try and find out if you do have feelings for Yaya-san." I seriously thought of deciding to find out if I was actually falling for my best friend soon after Tamao-chan had said that.

"But! I have to warn you… Hikari…" she stopped her cleaning and walked back to me. She sat by my side and again held my shoulders tightly. I just looked at her as she said this to me in a serious tone; "If you decide to find out if you are indeed have feelings for Yaya-san… hearts may break. It could be Yaya-san's …Amane-sama's …and maybe even yours."

Her words felt heavy. It seems that I have a lot of responsibility… after all two hearts, not including mine, was riding on this decision. "I'll…" I was about to tell her that my decision was to try to find out, but almost as if she knew it she interrupts me.

"Give it a little time. Think about it a little, Hikari. Then when you are sure… come and see me again." She tells me with a smile.

"Tamao-san…" I felt touched by her willingness to give me her support. Part of her reminds me of Yaya-chan. I nodded and thanked her for her help and hospitality. We stood from the bed and proceeded to the door. "I should get going and let you write the script now." I told her with a light smile.

She nods to me, keeping the warm but oddly sad smile on her face. Opening the door, we are surprised to find out Nagisa-chan was just about to knock on the door.

"Hello! Nagisa-chan." I greeted her with the best smile I could.

Tamao-san opened the door wider and said; "Welcome back! How long have you been there, Nagisa-chan?"

Nagisa-chan smiled and raised her hand to scratch her head, in the cute and silly way that only she could pull off. I noticed the blush on her face, the very same one she tried to hide from us by turning her head way. "Eheh… About a minute or two... It said "Do not disturb." I didn't want to bother Tamao-chan." It made me fear a little that Nagisa-chan was having the wrong idea about what Tamao-san and I were doing inside.

"What were the two of you doing?" She asked.

I was about to tell her that I had come to ask Tamao-san for advice. But Tamao-san had a different story in mind. "I'm sorry Nagisa-chan, that's a secret between me and Hikari-chan." She told her with a smile, before looking at me and saying. "Isn't that right Hikari?"

"Eh?" I suddenly found myself looking at her, and was about to say otherwise but… I notice her wink the one eye that was probably not in Nagisa-chan's line of sight. Feeling I owe her I decided to play along with her. "Yes! That's right!"

"Ehhhhhhhh…" Nagisa-chan pouted cutely, a little upset that she was left out of the story. Tamao-san and I laughed and complemented Nagisa-chan for just being so cute.

I took my leave then, deciding that I'll take Tamao-san's advice and think about what I should do about my dilemma. I bit them goodbye and headed off somewhere to think. I considered for a moment to talk to Amane-sempai about it, we weren't together… yet at least. We were… I don't really know how to classify us. I felt like I needed a second opinion. Tamao-san's was helpful and all. I was hoping to get Nagisa-chan's opinion but for some reason, Tamao-san didn't want her to know. I wasn't really close to anyone else in our school except for Tsubomi…

_'Wait a minute… Tsubomi wasn't at dinner last night.' _

**To be continued…**

**_Please Review!!!_**

**Author's notes:** Again a little sorry for the delay. things happen XD I made it Hikari's turn because, I felt she was lagging behind the other two girls… not to mention the crowd of fan girls.

To the one that said Yaya was showing a "Mary Sue" tendency… thank you for that warning ;; I was doing my best to keep Yaya's talents from being… well too good. But I still felt that I liked what I was doing so I'm not changing it. And to explain Yaya's sudden boost in popularity, lets just say that her not having her voice and the subtle changes in her actions made her seemingly more approachable. But thank you, I'll keep the "Mary Sue" thing in mind and do my best to keep away from making Yaya become like that as much as possible.

The next chapter might be a small filler featuring Tamao and Nagisa… Might! XD

To my loyal readers: Thank you for your support! X3 I'm nearly half way thru! XD


	13. Filler Chapter 3: Tamao

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. XD

**Author's Notes:** Yes… um… sorry for the delay. It seems that I've been pressuring myself to write so much that I ended up not writing… so no more of that. I'll write at my own pace… sorry if it may seem slow to you, my readers, but I work best that way.

Anyway I know it's a labeled as a filler but I guess it can count as Chapter 8.5. The only reason I say it's a filler because Tamao isn't one of the main characters in my story. But you can count this as a sort of prologue to the story for Tamao and Nagisa I'm writing.

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Filler Chapter 3: Tamao: For the best…**

Hikari-chan came by earlier and invited me out for a walk. I was a bit happy that she had honored my request to come to me when she had decided. There were a few things that I wanted to talk to her about as well.

It was around four in the afternoon, Nagisa-chan and I were just on our way back to our room after a short walk. It was a rare thing lately, as I'm sure Nagisa-chan wanted to spend time with someone I'd rather not name because… I'd probably kill her _'again!'_ in my head. It was then that we saw Hikari, dressed in a yellow sundress and a blue vest. She was walking away from the direction of our room. My only guess was she came looking for me.

My red haired roommate beat me to greeting her. "Hikari-chan! Good Afternoon." Nagisa-chan called out and ran towards our St. Spica friend, brightly and happily smiling at her and even almost pouncing on the girl.

Hikari-chan returned Nagisa-chan explosively happy greeting with a gentle smile. "Good Afternoon. Nagisa-chan…" she paused and looked at me. "Tamao-san."

I knew immediately what she wanted. I smiled and nodded to her, acknowledging her hidden message. I turned my full attention temporarily to Nagisa-chan. "Nagisa-chan, Hikari-chan and I have to talk for a bit. Please head back without me."

"Ehhhhh…" She pouted, she wasn't appreciating being left out of the story again. But it was for the best, there are things that Nagisa-chan shouldn't know… to keep her happy or at the very least… so that I would not be the one to make her sad.

"I'm sorry. Nagisa-chan…" Hikari-chan clasped her hand together and bowed her head towards Nagisa-chan in an almost begging manner. "…It's a little private… I asked Tamao-chan because I had a feeling she could help me."

I watched as Nagisa-chan blushed in embarrassment at having someone bow to her like that. "AH! Don't do that Hikari-chan. I don't really mind." Or so she said, but I could tell that from her laugh at the end she was really bothered that she couldn't be part of it. The girl is surprisingly curious, even if she doesn't look it. Hikari-chan thanked her and began walking towards.

I told Nagisa-chan that I will be back as soon as I could and began walking away with Hikari-chan. I noted that Nagisa-chan had that cute look of frustration, she does it whenever feels annoyed or slightly upset. I giggled and purposely showed her making her know that I know she pouting. This would cause her to pout just a little more, before she realizes I'm just messing with her head… that makes her pout even more, which unfortunately for her but fortunate for me because I get to laugh and see her make a cute pouting face.

We walked in silence; we didn't want our conversation to be overheard by anyone. It was almost an unspoken agreement between us to look for somewhere private before we have our talk. We found it at probably the best possible place for her to talk about this, the church's secret backyard garden… Hikari-chan and Yaya-san's fateful meeting place. She stood there just beside the door staring at the places where she probably pictured Yaya-san lounge around. She took a few moments before turning her attention to me and said; "Tamao-san, I want to know."

"I see…" I said and smiled. I felt a little envious of Yaya-san. I'm not blind, I know from the way that she looks at Hikari-chan… that she harbors deep feelings for this blonde girl. I know… because that exactly how I look at Nagisa-chan. But it's also quite sad, that this girl is face will be faced with difficult choices sooner or later. And though my interference might have a negative impact to Yaya-san or Amane-sama on the long run, depending on Hikari-chan's feelings, I still fee that as a friend I should at least help in what ways I can.

"In that case, Hikari-chan, I have some good news and some bad news for you… both are important and this might change your decision." I looked at her seriously. This is very important and should probably have been said before Hikari made her choice. She looked at me and kept all attention on what I was about to say, I could see a lot of anxiety in her eyes. I'm sure the words 'bad news' didn't sound the least bit pleasing.

"…" I hesitated telling her, and figured she might not want to know too badly. Not to mention that these are purely my observations of her best friend and not actual facts. "These are just my observations so they could be wrong… Do you still want to know?"

She swallowed nervously before nodding. "Yes. Please."

I must say that I am surprised by her decisions. I had actually expected the opposites to be honest. I had always pictured Nagisa-chan and Hikari-chan to be more or less the same… I had thought that by now Hikari-chan would be too fond of Amane-sama to even notice Yaya-san. But I guess I was wrong… _'and oddly it didn't feel so bad being wrong.'_

"Well then… I guess I should start with the good news." I noted that Hikari tensed up when I said that. "I'm not sure if you had noticed Hikari but I think, Yaya-san really liked you."

Hikari blushes and looks down. She smiles and oddly but happily says; "Yeah… she tells me that a lot. She used to be very clingy and teased me a lot about anything…"

Seeing that she was a little dense was painful… I feel sorry for Yaya-san already. But at the very least the way she looked just now might actually give Yaya-san some hope. I decided to interrupt and correct the girl's idea of Yaya-san liking her. I placed both my hands on her shoulders shook her once and held her firmly. "No… Hikari. Yaya-san REALLY… Liked you."

Her eyes open wide just as quickly as her jaw drops. She looked stunned at the revelation. "Eh?"

"She liked you Hikari." I repeated to her seeing that she was in a shocked state of disbelief.

When she recovered from the shock she immediately asked; "Since… when?"

"I don't know. But I do know, that the clinginess, the teasing, the over protectiveness and the possessiveness were her tiny ways of showing you that she liked you… most likely in that way, Hikari."

"But why didn't she just tell me?" Hikari-chan asked, beginning to look a little frustrated. Tears dared to fall from her eyes as I can only imagine how hurt she is learning that she had been so insensitive to her own best friend's feelings.

I smiled and gave her a slightly disappointed curious look. I doubted Yaya-san didn't try to tell the girl her feelings… at most I can imagine that Yaya-san had done so indirectly and seemingly jokingly that Hikari-chan here didn't catch on. I guess that says that Yaya-san failed being direct with her feelings, but she's not completely at fault. And in the end… there really isn't anyone you can blame for these things.

"Hikari-chan… I recall that you have or had quite a big crush on Ootori-sama, am I right?" I asked to prove something.

She looked a bit dumbfounded but answered "Yes?"

"My best guess is that Yaya-san… she knew you didn't feel that way about her and that you loved someone else." _'How could she not? She listens to the girl everyday, I almost share your pain Yaya-san.'_

"But why did she kiss me?!" she asked almost shouting.

That surprised me a bit because I found myself looking around wondering if anyone was eavesdropping on us. I then frowned thinking _'does she really need to ask?'_ But I suppose I can help her understand. "My guess… It was a moment of weakness, and a last desperate attempt to make you understand her feelings. It didn't work out at all though… and almost ruined your friendship." I told her trying to keep my tone of voice as soft as comforting, as oppose to how I really feel at that moment

She looks down sadly, a few drops of tears fell from her eyes. "I see…"

I gave her sometime to think and absorb the information. And as easy and painless I wanted to tell her these things, I suppose it almost impossible for her not to feel guilty, saddened or pained, especially not after she hears my bad news. She was crying already and though I didn't really want her to hurt even more. I decided that once is better than twice.

"And the bad news Hikari…" I paused at myself, dropping the honorifics for now. This was just too serious to care about such things at the moment. "Is that… she might be already making measures to get over you."

"Eh?" I watched her teary eyes open wide again.

I decided to spare her too much thinking. "She's spending as little time as possible with you lately has she not?" I watch her nod eyes open and full of tears.

"She's probably trying to touch you less and less as possible lately too right?" Again she nodded in response.

"Has she teased you lately?" I asked. Yaya-san's teasing after all seemed like mine, a way of showing her affections. I hoped that Hikari-chan was taking this all to heart, she'll need it if she truly intends to find out if she has feelings for her best friend or not.

"It might have been the other way around lately…" she quickly and almost inaudibly muttered in response.

Which had caught my attention that I had to ask; "What do you mean?"

She blushed and looked away. Seeing that reaction, made me decided that I'll either try to ask her later or just let my own imagination fill the gaps. "So now that you know this… Hikari…" I paused and waited for her to look at me…

"What are you going to do?" I held her hands tightly. I meant a lot of things when I did so. Like don't run away, or do what you think is best. Because… in a way she'll be carrying my unfulfilled wish too… I didn't mind the tears that started following from my eyes.

"Are you going to risk hurting her before she gets over you? Or risk hurting yourself if she isn't actually in love or had already gotten over you?" By the time I had said that my tears were flowing quite strongly… I felt that when the time came and she makes her decision and that is also the time when I have to make mine.

I couldn't control my tears, and if she's as dense as I think she is, she wouldn't realize why. I then continued to tell her, her last choice, but all the emotions I felt were taking a toll on me. Envy, Sadness, Guilt, and a bit of Anger… made my voice shake; "…or just let… things be… and forget… about… all this?" With that said I just looked at her, with eyes so blurry and full of tears.

She was still crying and at this point was as badly as I was. Her voice shook too as she spoke; "Tamao-san?"

"Yes?" I almost sounded bitter. But I swear it was the crying fit…

"You like Nagisa-chan don't you?" she asked sounding a bit worried.

'_I guess she wasn't as dense as I thought she was.'_ was my first and only thought… as mean as it sounded. Eyes still full of tears and throat oddly parched… I could only close my eyes and wholeheartedly nod.

"Then why don't you…" I felt that knew what she wanted to say. That I should tell Nagisa-chan how I feel, that somehow it could work out and we could be closer… and that I didn't have to suffer like this. But of course I thought that I knew her better and would already know what would happen… just like Yaya-san.

"Hikari…" I called her attention cutting of what she was about to say.

"Y-Yes?"

"The situation may be the same… but people are different. I can't and don't want to commit the same mistake Yaya-san did." I said.

"Mistake?" Hikari-chan had almost yelled. If I didn't know any better, I'd probably think she was in love with Yaya-san.

"Pardon my words Hikari, to me Yaya-san kissing you was a mistake or accident on her behalf. I believe that she didn't mean to do it." I apologize and explained to her my view on the matter.

And though she didn't seem to like it, she looked like she understood what I had meant. "I guess that seems right."

"and to continue… I can't tell her directly how I feel when I know that she loves someone else."

"Just like Yaya-chan…" she mumbled out and looked at the ground.

"I suppose." I muttered almost absently.

"But!" Sensing her wish to argue for my sake, I had decided to firmly cut her off and tell her why. "Hikari!"

"Yes?" she seemed surprised by my sudden sternness… but that was ok.

"Yaya-san… as your best friend did what she thought was best. I believe that all she truly wanted was you to be happy, even if she had to suffer for it. Sure… she screwed up a little, and allowed you to see a part of her that she didn't want you to see, because it would confuse you and/or ruin your friendship." I said to her, but to be honest… parts of those were really my feelings, rather than what I think Yaya-san's were.

"…" We were silent for a moment, especially Hikari-chan who was now trying desperately to stop her tears.

"So please understand; that as her best friend… No matter how painful it is… I can't and don't want to interfere, as long as she's happy."

"Tamao-san…" she looked at me with a soft and sad smile, the blueness of her eyes hidden away by a wall of tears.

"It's better to have a part of something, rather than risk losing it all. So please promise… to keep that between us." I asked her to never tell anyone. I had never told anyone, though it may have been obvious from time to time… But as long as Nagisa-chan doesn't know, then there is no need for me worry.

With tears forming from both our eyes she promised and linked our pinkies together in a 'pinky swear'. "Tamao-san… I promise."

"Thank you. That's all I ask." I told her, shook our pinkies and wiped the tears in my eyes with my free hand.

"…And…" she added and paused which made me wonder if she was hesitating. But one look at her, drying of her tears and giving me a confident smile told me otherwise. "I'll do my best learn my true feelings. I have to do so before Yaya-chan completely gives up on me." She said almost jokingly.

"I see…" I smiled as I heard her decision. "I wish you the best luck then, Hikari-chan."

"Thanks a lot! And… Tamao-san… Maybe you should give Nagisa-chan the chance to understand your feelings too."

My smile irked for a moment and my eyes felt heavy. Deep inside I knew that I had no chance. But all this talk about risks, chances and mistakes… makes one think more doesn't it? "I guess I'll try to keep that in consideration."

Hikari-chan's smiled brighter and returned to me what I said earlier. "Thank you. That's all I ask."

We laughed at that comment for a while. And when we were done… I decided to head back. Hikari decided to stay in the garden for a while and think about how she'll try and learn her true feelings for Yaya-san. I suggested to her before I left that she should just try and spend time with the girl, doing things that they used to do a lot together… except singing of course, after all we're not sure if Yaya-san's voice has returned.

I arrived back into the dorms, I had probably gone out for just over an hour. I had decided to stop by a the restroom the ground floor and check whether the crying we did earlier left any too noticeable details of it on my face, before I headed back to our room. And had I known what was awaiting me in my room, I would have probably not come back so early.

When I opened the door, I screamed in surprise when something or someone surprised and pounced at me, yelling "TAMAO-CHAN!!! I..."

My attacker and I almost fell onto the floor, had I not quickly stepped back a step or two. I closed my eyes felt a surge of pain mostly from behind me, as I ended up being sandwiched between the outer wall of one of our front door neighbors room, and a soft flesh of someone who distinctly smells like Nagisa-chan and her shampoo. My face felt warm, incredibly warm… in fact, it was too warm to be just mine. I slowly opened my eyes and was met with a pair dark yet soft red eyes, opened as wide as my own… and for good reason.

The warm feeling on my face that made me think it was too warm to be just mine was right… there was another one directly on mine. And most of it was on my lips. It didn't take me long to see, but it took a while for me to register that… Our lips were together…

We were both stunned for a while, but it was I who first recovered. I decided that pushing her away and citing that this was an accident would be the best solution.

"Ah! I'm sorry Nagisa-chan?!" I quickly apologized.

"Eh?! Ah! … n-n-No… it's my fault. I should be sorry." she looked down, blushing in apology.

Thinking very quickly to avert the matter I told her; "Oh no! it's okay Nagisa-chan! It was an accident!"

"Right! An… Accident." She absently mumbled.

"…" There was an eerie silence between us. It felt odd and suffocating. I decided to give her sometime to recover, so I said; "I think go down to the dinning hall and grab a juice or something…"

But as I turned to leave she almost yells out; "Ah! Tamao-chan! Wait!" as she grabs my hand and pulls me back. "It's alright. We didn't mean anything by it…" she said as her voice began to crack and her eyes began forming tears.

'_oh no! I didn't mean to make her cry.'_ I quickly placed a hand on her head and asked; "Nagisa-chan! What's wrong?"

She looked at me, teary eyed and in between sobs and hiccups she told me; "Don't go! I don't want what happened to Hikari-chan and Yaya-chan to happen to us. I don't want us to have a fight."

"Nagisa…" I patted her head and wrapped my arms around her neck and pulled her head close to my chest. "shh… I would never fight with you Nagisa-chan. Your smile is so important to me."

"Tamao-chan!" She called my name loudly and hugged my waist as tight as she possibly could. And it was painful… literally. _'Oh no… I can't breathe… too tight… she never hugged me this tight before.'_ And for a moment I thought I was going to black out.

She loosens her hold of me and without knowing it, allowed me to breathe once again. _'Thank You… Maria-sama…'_ I silently prayed.

"Tamao-chan…" she softly called out my name.

"What is it, Nagisa?"

"We'll always be best friends forever right?" Those words sounded so familiar… I then remembered they were the same words that Hikari-chan told Yaya-san when they made up.

"…" '_I guess in the end it wasn't actually Yaya-san decision to get over Hikari-chan. Instead it was Hikari-chan's. As it's Nagisa-chan's to make mine.'_ With my hand I brushed the hair on the back of her head gently. I nodded and continued hugging her.

'_I guess… I know what I have to do.'_

… **to be continued.**

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Author's Notes:** Again (haha… this is becoming a routine) I apologize for the great delay. As promised a Tamao narrated chapter! X3 In a way I guess Yaya's Voice and the up coming story is connected in some sort of way… or I could write it to be connected to it. XD

I know I've been slow lately… but I'm happy to say I'm glad that I've been getting more readers and reviewers as of the late. I could hardly believe that lately my latest chapters get an average of 90 views on it's first 24 hours. And I'm happy to see that the last chapter before this one received more than 10 reviews after a week. My old record was 7-8 reviews. Hehe

Everyone Thanks for your support!!


	14. Chapter IX: Yaya

Disclamier: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. TT;; (poor me… lol)

Author's Notes: This is my record breaking chapter! Well it broke my record! X3 as the longest chapter so far! Expanding over 11,000+ words! Breaking my previous longest chapter record by at least about 4,700 words. Weee!

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 9: Yaya: Saying goodbye**

I stare out in the wonderful ocean sunrise. This would be the second morning since I've strengthened my resolve to do what I have decided. It was a beautiful morning, I felt revitalized just watching the beautiful bright glow of the sea as the rays of sunlit bounces from them as if they were a million mirrors. The sea breeze felt nice and cool on my warm skin. The sound of the water's waves and the call of the birds out here were very calming.

I'm sitting on the window sill of the master's second floor quarters. It was a huge traditional Japanese room and decorated as such. This was in my very own personal beach villa. The very one that my father and mother had it built, furnished, and had paid to maintain all for me to play in since I was eight years old. I was fascinated with traditional Japanese setting back then you see. I used to love watching old samurai movies, I've been so obsessed with it that I have even learned basic kendo. I used to enjoy going to history museums pertaining the subject with my father. This was because before my father became the head of the family, the Nanto clan was a very traditional family. This caused me to have a traditional view and interests back in my early childhood. But when my father took his position as the family head many welcome changes came which gave a lot of my relatives and their families more freedom. This also allowed me to learn and like other things no matter how untraditional they were.

Now even though I'm not that… well… obsessed with the traditional anymore, this house always reminds me a lot of my fonder memories as child. Coming to this secluded villa, helps me calm down… reminding me I'm one of the lucky brats; to have a rich and almost noble Japanese family, to be given this much luxury and even to be given so much freedom in life. To be honest, had my Grandfather still been the head of the family… I would probably be miss primed and proper, all dressed up in beautiful white kimono visiting my future husband to be or maybe even married already. I guess I have to thank my father for breaking my engagement as soon as he ascended. Though I do feel like asking why he did… but I can at least guess that he didn't want me to get married, he was always the over protective type and a 'daughter's man' as I'd like to call him. I guess that's one thing to do once I get my voice back.

Speaking of kimonos I'm in one now… well I guess the best term for it is barely in one. I do have it on, but I'm feeling quite warm here that I've kept it very loosely on. But no worries, it's not like I'm naked underneath… I got my swimsuit on and there are only girls here for at least a mile or two. _'Grandmother would probably faint if she saw me like this.'_ I laughed at that thought.

I took a deep breath. It felt good to be out of school. Funny I never thought I'd say that, back when I told my father I wanted to enter st. Spica. He wanted me to enter an even more prestigious high school besides st. Spica. He was expecting a lot from me, and had already added my name among those who would probably take his place as head of the family. But I said that I really wanted to attend st. Spica and to my surprise he didn't try to convince me otherwise… well not much.

A knock came from the door, which opened a few seconds after. The door revealed a young woman with shoulder length red hair and was dressed in a brown maid dress and apron. "Good Morning! Yaya-Ojou-sama." she said. This seemingly strict and uptight girl is Hisui, she and her sister Kohaku used to play with me when we were children. I waved at her with a small bitter smile, she never did grant my request to stop calling me "Ojou-sama" and I don't have the ability to nag her about it for now… but at least Kohaku isn't as stubborn.

To be honest I see them like the big sisters I never had. Grandfather had taken them in from the orphanage and we've been together since. They were to be servants for my family, but when my father became the family head he had given the two their freedom and so instead of being servants my father hired them to be my maids, at least until they graduate or they choose to live on their own. Though I don't see that coming, they say they're pretty happy being my maids. After all… they live and care for my private villa, which is almost my very own house that I rarely get to use because I'm in a dorm school. But I call them once in a while to pick me up when I need some pampering and stress relief.

I mouthed a "good morning" to her then a "thank you" seeing a cup of tea on the tray in her hands. She places the tea down in front of me on the small two feet tall table near the bedroom window. And as if reading my mind before my hand could reach for my notebook she tells me; "Tsubomi-sama, is still in her room." I retracted my hand nodded and looked out the window once again.

I sensed her bow and turn to leave, but before she exits I feel her sharply turning around. "Is there anything you'd like for breakfast today, Ojou-sama?" she asks. To which I shook my head in response. This mean I didn't have anything special I'd want to eat, but don't get me wrong. Kohaku's cooking is quite excellent which usually comprise of dishes I never see in Astraea Hill and tends to be something I miss while I'm stuck in the dorms… so I guess that's like saying eating her home cooked meals are special enough as it is. Which reminds me… I should take Tsubomi to town to shop for souvenirs to give everyone back in school to pay her back as thanks for what she's done for me. Hisui probably bows and closes the door quietly as she's always done.

My eyes fell on my hands especially left wrist which was freshly bandaged again last night, apparently not healing well even after a week. But it could be that I'm really just a slow healer. My hand was full of cuts and bruises. My legs had a few bruises on them too but that's to be expected after kicking a few tables and chairs. I'm a little worried about the wrist though… small cuts of mine usually heal sooner or later, but I don't get injured often and especially not this big, I think that I might have some sort of blood deficiency or something. I guess I'll ask the nurse to make another appointment for me when Tsubomi and I get back from this weekend vacation.

I feel a little sorry for dragging Tsubomi out here. I usually come here on my own; I would call up Kohaku and ask her to fetch me from school. I'd sneak my way out of the school of course. Getting the require paperwork and authorization, as well as making a call to my parents would just take too much time… that by the time I'm allowed to go… I don't feel like going anymore. I guess I'm just a very 'on whim' person in some or a lot of aspects. Anyway for obvious reasons I had to ask Tsubomi to call Kohaku for me, and somehow I couldn't help but invite her along to be polite… I didn't expect her to want come with at all. She can be such an uptight rule abiding pain in the butt… most of the time. But lately… I find that she's pretty nice when she wants to be and can be really good company.

Speaking of Tsubomi… after Ootori had left me alone in the art room I had trashed up… I pretended to clean while she was leaving but after I was sure she was gone… I just felt tired. I walked up to a wall where not much of the now thrashed up furniture were, leaned on it and slowly dropped myself to the floor. I didn't cry, not that I could anymore. I felt pathetic… I was miserable, tired, thirsty, hungry and bleeding. I looked at my hands, my right knuckles was bruised, full of cuts and even had small pieces of wood fragments, most likely from the blackboard, stuck in them.

I pretty much spaced out… my anger drained, my composure gone and my spirit broken. It seemed like an eternity since I've been happy. At that moment, I couldn't even hate anyone… I just wanted to disappear. It was then that she came.

"Sempai?!" she called out to me. I didn't respond and at that time, I barely even recognized her. She came closer towards me and inspected me, knelt and tried to somehow get my attention. I expected her to lecture me and tell to get a hold of myself… that I was her sempai and needed to show some strength and pride as one… but it didn't come. Instead she told me stand. I did, with a lot of help from her. It was then that I felt just how tired and in pain I was. All the kicking I've done had bruised my legs, which felt very painful to stand on and I had to lean on Tsubomi for a lot of support. She led me out of the room and dragged me somewhere without another word.

I was surprised that she had brought me to the infirmary. She placed me down onto a bed and looked for the nurse or a first aid kit. She returned after a few moments with a white box that had a red cross on it. Pulling up a chair she sat down in front of me. She opens the box and prepares what she needs to take care of my wounds. She then takes my wounded hand, "This might sting a little sempai." She warned to which I just nodded to in response.

The medicine did sting, I'm almost glad I'm currently mute I tend to dish out curses when I'm in pain. But after a while the numbing effect of the medicine was very much welcomed. She quietly cleans every wound and wraps them all with a fresh set of bandages. After that she rolls down my socks and inspects my bruised legs. She treats them with some pain reliving patches. Once she was done she rolls my socks back up and gives me a smile saying; "All done." I looked at her and smile softly, but gratefully.

There was an odd silence in the room, I didn't have my notebook with me right now I couldn't really give her thanks or answer anything she'd like to know.

"Sempai…" she called my attention, I looked at her and I could tell that she wanted to ask something. Her expression not hiding her desire to ask and wonder how to ask her question, but she never did…

"Nevermind… You should get some rest sempai." She told me looking all concerned. I wanted to tell her that I have a mess to clean up, but since I couldn't do that I just tried to stand. When I did I felt a shocking pain shoot thru from my legs. I almost fell down and kissed the floor if Tsubomi hadn't been able catch me. "I told you. You should get some rest, Sempai! Being hard headed about doing something in your condition is only going to bring you more injuries." Those words stung a little, I always thought that being hard headed was one of my few good traits.

She shifted me onto her shouldered and carried most of my weight. "Let's go I'll take your to your room." She told me, in a kind soothing voice that felt nice after what I've been thru. I nodded and began to walk with her.

Outside… we found ourselves the center of a lot of attention. A lot of girls that were on their way back saw me leaning onto Tsubomi. None of them bothered helping the girl, nor me, which was a good thing… I was beginning to like leaning on her like this. After a while she had managed to get me up to the room I shared with Hikari. We enter and she sets me down on to a chair and opens my dresser.

"You should at least get out of those dirty clothes" she said. At that moment I was beginning to think that Tsubomi was nicer than I've given her credit for. I watched her browse through my dresser looking for a suitable thing to wear. She took out the red silk one piece pajamas I rarely use, I tend to sleep in anything I can wear outside so long as it's clean, pajamas rarely was my thing. But given that I wouldn't want to wear anything tight at the moment, which was almost everything I owned, I think she's made a good choice for me.

As she helps me out of my uniform and into my pajamas, I noticed faint blush on her face as she tried not to look at my half naked body too much. I'm almost sad that she asked me to not tease her anymore, not that I can tease her right then and there but the thought that I can, could and would, would have been gratifying enough.

After getting me in a fresh set of clothes she, gently sets me down onto my bed. It was then that I felt exactly how tired I've been. Two seconds on the bed and not yet covered with my blanket but I could already feel my eyes falling and daring to close. I gather what little strength I had left to wait for her to tuck me and so I could thank her at least… But that thought was the last thing I remember that day.

Moments later the door opened again and Hisui revealed herself outside the door. "Ojou-sama, Breakfast is ready. Tsubomi-sama is awake and is the dining room." She informed me. I nodded before I stood from the window sill and closed it. I walked towards the door but only after I had picked up my notebook and the cup of tea, which I hadn't had the chance to drink yet. She opens the door wider for me and closes it after I've exited.

We arrive in the dining room downstairs, where I was lucky enough to see Tsubomi yawn without covering her mouth. I cover my mouth to hide the big smile in my face. She still look very sleepy, and almost slouched on her chair. She notices Hisui and I come in.

"Good… morning… Sempai." She said rather absently.

Something I just had to giggle to before I wrote something on my notebook and tapped it with my pencil, which per Hisui's suggestion will mean me asking her to read it aloud for whoever it is talking to me. Hisui glances at the notebook and quickly scans it's contents and verbalizes it for Tsubomi, who I bet it's still to sleepy to read.

"Tsubomi-sama, Yaya-Ojou-sama would like to say that you should sleep some more if you wish… And that your yawning mouth is cute." She read it in an almost dead manner, which was funny in a sarcastic sort of way. Tsubomi blushed and threw me an angry look while I hid my giggling smile behind my hands.

Kohaku who came in from the kitchen with the last dishes saved me from Tsubomi's possibly short lived lecture of being rude. I took a look at all the dishes on the table and was amazed at how they all looked, not to mention smelled. I could feel that my stomach would growl any minute if I don't give it something to digest soon. Placing my hands together, almost in a form of prayer and silently lipped "Itadakimasu.", before digging into my freshly grilled fish, omelet, rice balls and miso soup. I didn't ask Kohaku or Hisui to sit and dine with us, because I can't for one and two they wouldn't because I have a guest. I can still feel Tsubomi glare at me for having the smile on my face, which I decided to keep there for a while for the sake of annoying her.

After we had breakfast I was quite sure that my smile was still there, but I know it's not for the same reason. I was really happy eating something different for a change. I love the school's food but eating it everyday makes it less special. I'd probably say the same thing about eating Kohaku's meals, except to my knowledge she is also quite familiar with Western cuisine as well. Making it less easier to say; "Let's eat out tonight."

"Sempai… I know it's hard to get rid of a bad habit, but don't you think that's quite crossing it?" Tsubomi grumbled to me in a low angry tone. I stared at her for a second with a confused look. The reason for her annoyance escaped me for a moment and when I did remember the reason, I decided to drop the subject anyway.

I went back up to my room to get something easier to wear than a kimono. I took out a red jacket and denim shorts from my bag and wore them over my swimsuit as soon as I had disrobed the heavy white kimono. I grabbed an old red baseball cap from my closet, when I noticed a big red tool box at the bottom of the closet. I took it out and opened it, and then I realized that it was my angler tool kit. My father bought it for me when he first learned how to fish and wanted to show it off to me by teaching me.

A few memories of my father streamed in my mind; him teaching me how to cast a line, how to tie a knot, how to place live bait, how to properly reel in the fish, how to hold the fish, and what to do with it if I decide not to let it go. I smiled to myself and decided… I'm going finishing. I checked if the rod was still in good condition. As soon as I was satisfied with it I placed it back inside the tool kit and took it down with me.

"Ah Sempai! Going out?" Tsubomi asked when she notices me come back down.

I nodded and grabbed my notebook and wrote; _"Yeah. I'm going fishing at my small pier."_

"Can I come?" she followed quickly.

I was about to give her a no… but when I saw the way she looked at me I just couldn't. I gave her a nod and a smile.

"Yehey!!!" She exclaimed happily as she jumped up and down. _'That was so unlike her.'_ I thought, I've always seen Tsubomi differently, like an annoying homeroom teacher only younger… much younger… the last thing I'd thought I'd see her do is jump happily up and down. But something tells me that I'll be learning a lot more about her sooner or later.

When she noticed I was watching her jump merrily up and down she stopped, blushed brightly and said; "I do not really wanting to go out with you! You know… It's just that it would be boring to stay inside the house all day, alone. And I might as well enjoy the beach while I'm here. And besides isn't it your duty as my host to entertain me during my stay in your home?"

'_Now that's the Tsubomi I know…'_ I thought as I dared not to crack a smile. Instead I just scratched my cheek and headed out the door.

After a few minutes of walking, we reached my private pier. Where a small wooden boat and a jet ski was waiting for us to use. I set myself and the tool box on the farthest point of the pier, where there might some fish hiding in the depths. As I was preparing to cast my first bait when I noticed that Tsubomi was eyeing the jet ski…

"_The key is with Kohaku."_ I wrote and showed her.

"I… uh…"

"_Go ahead!"_ I added and showed her with a smile.

She gave it a little thought, and smiled. "Okay! I'll be right back!" I nodded as she ran back to the house.

I cast out a heavy lure. I wasn't really keen on catching anything in particular really. All I wanted to do was relax, watch the sea, listen to the rising waves, the passing birds, the occasional boat or ship and maybe think a little.

Last Thursday had got to be the worst day of my life. I was pretty much annoyed with the things that had been happening that day. I didn't get much of a good sleep last night… Hikari seems to have been having her wet dreams lately and had been taking it out on me during her sleep. I recall having to wear some make up to cover the hickeys she's been leaving on me during the night. I know it could be avoided by not letting her sleep with me, but I can't just say no to that girl. Then there was her being so spaced out around me lately. Plus that stupid fan club that I have to learn to be careful of from now on… That means no more hair samples for Rin, I didn't think she was serious about that fan girl tale… I thought she wanted to use my hair for some magic spell/tool or something. And of course… how can I forget, Amane's Kiss… Hikari would cry and hate me if she learns about that. I'm so glad I don't keep a diary…

I recall staring at my canvas… I couldn't believe I was doing that to myself. I already know I like her so much… and that it won't do any good… and that I'm only prolonging my suffering. _'But why am I hanging on so much?' 'So what if I love her?' 'What's love anyway?'_ I knew all that…

And yet as I looked at the eyes of the angel in my painting, I thought; _'Is it her smile? Is her eyes? Her voice? Something about her just kept me there for her; to protect her, accompany her, and keep her smiling, but she not a little girl that needs those from me anymore. Ootori is more than capable to protect her, staying by her side and made her smile brighter than I ever could.'_

'_So why is my heart still here for her?'_ I asked myself painfully and judgingly.

I placed my paint brush down and slumped back onto my chair, which made a few rusty creaks. I looked up at the ceiling. A hundred thoughts filled me… all deeply and painfully emotional.

'_I wished it would just stop beating…'_

I recalled kicking the desk first, I didn't matter which desk though. I kicked it… angrily. Deep inside, I hated myself… What good was blaming someone else for it? I know I have the right to say that I hated her. That I wished she wasn't there. Or that she was dead… To be honest I thought about it at first.

But then… as my tears began to flow and my self rage grew beyond what I control… I kicked my easel and the painting of the angel, I thought;

'…_I wish I was dead.'_

'_Someone just shoot me... please'_

'_I HATE MYSELF!'_

'_I don't want to hurt anymore…'_

'_I'm so sorry Hikari.'_

'…_for everything.'_

By the time I could regain my composure… I had trashed more or less half the art room. But I wasn't worried about that at all… probably if the teacher noticed, they'll call my parents or expel me or something. At that moment, getting expelled seem like a pretty welcome idea. I was on the floor, crying on the very trashed floor. When someone placed a hand on my shoulder and called my name.

"Nanto-san." Her voice… was the last one I wanted to hear. She called out to me in a way that was supposed to comfort me… but that was the last thing that would happen. I turned and saw the worried face of Ootori Amane… the last face I wanted to see. I shot her a look that screamed; 'I hate you.' even though it's not really her fault. But it gave me an odd sense of sadistic satisfaction when see her face twist up in fear.

I shrugged of her hand and tried to leave. But she grabs my hand and asks me to wait. I wasn't ready when she suddenly pulled me towards her. She catches me and wraps her arms around, which I instinctively struggled to get free. I tried kicking her legs, elbowing her sides, wriggling my way out of her arms and even aiming for her face with the back of my head. But she kept held of me until I wore myself out, telling me over and over; "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

She turned me to face her and continued to hug me as I cried. The tears just would not stop. I was overwhelmed with so many emotions all mixing improperly inside me; Love, Hate, Anger, Loathing, Understanding, Sadness, Confusion, Forgiveness… and maybe even a little bit of Gratitude. The way she held me was comforting… I gave out and for once entrusted myself to someone. Not even my parents had the chance to hold me like this before, at least not since I learned how to run.

She apologized, said that she was sorry. She knew that I hated her… but not at first. She then said; "You love Hikari… don't you?"

My thoughts to that was; _'Was I that transparent?' 'Did Hikari know too?' 'I hate this!'_ I curled up my hand to a fist and hit Ootori's chest with it as my mind screamed… '_Why!?'… 'WHY?!'… 'WHY!?!'…_

She then said; "I'm very sorry… You were probably thinking; that if only I wasn't here, you would have had a better shot at winning her affections." She would never know how right she was and how guilty I felt hearing that.

"If it's any consolation… I think you held yourself pretty well around Hikari, for you to have held in your love for her and your hate towards me for this long without her suspecting… It must have been painful to fall in love with someone who loves someone else." I cried harder again… Here was the person I hated so much. Yet she was the one who understood me and came when I needed someone. I didn't know which was worse… her taking Hikari or her comforting me. Either way… I definitely feel very pathetic.

At that moment… Honestly I thought… that if I never met Hikari, and Amane wasn't so popular or that tall and had longer hair… I'd probably start liking her by now. And as I made those thoughts I never would have guess what she was going to do next… the soft, gentle and very comforting actions of hers. Wiping my tears, brushing my hair, gently caressing my cheek… ok actually had I been in the right state of mind, I probably would have seen it coming…

She then raised my head so that my face was directly in front hers, then she said; "I like you… forgive me…" and kissed me. I stiffened at first, shocked by what could have been her confession to me. But then my senses kicked it and I began struggling to get free from her. But I guess I was tired, my hands, my legs felt painful at this point… and her hold of me was very tight. I gave in… and allowed her to kiss me.

'_She likes me?'_ I asked myself. That thought was soon followed by others that argued that subject in and out. But in the end… I could only respect this girl... no! I should say a she's young woman. She was strong and mature enough to do something I couldn't. And though she may be betraying Hikari at this moment… I couldn't help but feel a little relieved, that I'm leaving Hikari to someone like her. _'I guess what I'm saying is that… I can start accept loosing Hikari to her.'_

I didn't return her kiss… not that she wasn't any good at it… I just didn't want her to get the wrong idea. In fact I bit my lip to make sure I didn't loose myself and kiss her back. But… at the very least I allowed her to for as long as she wanted, as my thanks for what she's done for me.

She broke the kiss minutes later. I immediately turned away and bowed my head. It felt a little humiliating and guilty to be placed in such a position. I can now see why Hikari hated the kiss I forced on her so much. She gently eased us down to the floor. It was about time too… my legs were starting to feel a little numb.

I stayed quiet, not that I had any choice, but I certainly didn't know how to react to what just happened. She then asked if that was my first kiss. I honestly shook my head almost immediately. "I see." She said with a very disappointed tone. I turned my head a tiny bit and looked at her from the corner of my eye and noted that she did look disappointed… _'Just… great… she gave me her first kiss… more to feel guilty about…'_ I inwardly sighed and watched my blood drop down from my bleeding lip to the tears on the floor. _'I suppose they can just share their second kiss or say they had an indirect first kiss thru me…'_ I thought to myself as I tried to feel better about the situation.

I was happy to learn that she wasn't going to break it off with Hikari. That she would honor my pain and do her best not to hurt Hikari. _'What a weird girl…'_ I remember writing something to her… Oh yes… I told her that I would kill her if she broke Hikari's heart. I made her promise, never to hurt Hikari… I definitely felt better when she bit lip and did a "bloody pinky swear" with me. That tells me a lot about her.

'_Thank You… Amane…'_ I said to the sky as I watched it reflect itself poorly on the rowdy ocean's surface.

"SEEEEMPAAAAAAI!!!!" I heard a very familiar voice of someone I cannot possibly forget call to me. I looked up from the water and saw Tsubomi, in her white swimsuit riding the jet ski behind Kohaku, who was oddly still wearing an apron with her brown swimsuit, and waving at me.

I couldn't help but smile and wave back at her. It was then that my line started tugging and pulling my rod from me. _'I CAUGHT SOMETHING!'_ I thought for a second before I could react. I quickly reeled in the fish, it almost good away too… I had this odd feeling that the line was about to snap. But in the end I was about to catch it and it was a nice big one… I have no idea what kind it was though. And I realized that had forgotten to get a big bucket of water to place it in. But just as I was about to let the fish go… I noticed that there was a water chest beside me, already full of water. _'Must have been Kohaku or Tsubomi who placed it there before they went rode the jet ski.'_

I placed the fish on the water chest, who splashed around a bit angry that it was placed in such a small place but soon calmed down when it realized it had no way of escaping especially when I closed the lid. I then cast my lure again in hopes for another.

I watched Tsubomi and Kohaku ride while I waited for the next fish to bite. It felt oddly nice and gratifying to see Tsubomi act her age, giggling and screaming like a young girl that she is while having fun. Was almost opposite of what I usually see her in as while at school and the dorms. She waves at me again when they passed close again and screamed out "ANY LUCK SEMPAI!?" so that I could hear her thru the noisy jet ski motor. I would have given her a thumbs up, but it seems that the girl was some sort of fish catching charm… another fish soon took my bait and was pulling my line.

Long story short… Tsubomi passing by in my jet ski with Kohaku, meant one more fish that took my bait. And since they passed by about seven more times, I ended my fishing with eight big fishes in my water chest. Hisui came to help me drag the thing full of water and fish half the way to the house. I could have done it myself… but I suppose that's what they're for.

When I returned to the pier, I saw Kohaku and Tsubomi bring the jet back to port. I motioned to Kohaku that I'd like to take it out. She immediately hands me the keys and I soon got on the thing. I then looked at Tsubomi who was watching me get on the floating motorcycle she was just riding. Giving her a smile, I move a little back wards and tapped the front seat.

"What is it sempai?" she asked with a slightly dumbfounded face.

I responded by tapping the seat again.

She blushed and asked; "Yo-You want me t-t-to ride with yo-yo-you?"

Nodding as I smiled at her caused her to blush some more. I liked it when she stuttered and blushed… I thought it was quite cute. She was quite cute. Not Hikari cute… but still cute is cute.

"Ok…" she answered with her head down, trying very hard not to look at me. She got on the seat in front of me. I quickly leaned on her as I grabbed the ski's control handles and inserted the key in the ignition. She quickly tensed up when our bodies touched… I can translate that to a lot of different meanings, but I won't for now.

I started the water vehicle and immediately headed out for sea. It felt nice, the salty breeze, the occasional splattering of cool ocean water and company… who I noticed was very quiet. And after a few minutes of riding without her reacting even a little bit like she did when she was riding with Kohaku… I decided do something and to stop in the middle of the water, which seems to have captured Tsubomi's attention.

She turned to me and asked; "Sempai? Why did you stop?"

I answered the only way I could… by taking her hands from her lap and placing it on the jet ski's controls before placing my arms around her waist. I wanted her to drive, actually it was the very reason I sat on the back seat… well that and I'd rather hug than be hugged, especially after… that.

"SEMPAI!?" She probably meant… _'Are you sure?!'_ or _'Are you crazy?!'_ but I didn't mind. I wanted to enjoy her enjoying herself. So in response I turned the ignition key and showed her how to make the thing go faster.

"Okay…" she said, rather nervously. I felt her swallow hard before turning up the speed. But after a few minutes of driving she slowly regains her excitement and screams out happily. She slowly seems to forget her earlier apprehension and eased up to enjoy the ride.

We rode till the ski was almost out of fuel. It was probably a nearly noon, probably around eleven or something. We docked the ski back to port and got back on land. I noticed that Kohaku and Hisui were already in the middle of preparing a barbeque lunch for us. So my guess that it was almost noon was probably quite accurate. I took Tsubomi's hand and urged her to run with me towards where an old wooden table, which didn't look one bit traditional, beside where my two maids were preparing our lunch for us.

"Ah! Yaya-chan! Done playing? Did you work up an appetite?" Kohaku asked me happily, in her sisterly yet almost motherly way.

I nodded with a smile. Though if I had my voice I'd probably say; "Is it done yet?!" in an exited and almost impolite tone, that if my mother were present she would scold me for… I guess loosing my voice gave me manners in exchange, can't say just yet if it's worth it though.

She then told me that it'll be done soon, that me and Tsubomi could sit down for a bit or grab something to drink from the ice box. Again I nodded, the only answer I could give besides a shaking head, which I didn't need to use. I sat down pulling friend with me. Wait did I just say friend? I've always thought and called her my 'Kouhai'… my annoying, interfering, loud, obnoxious, busy body… junior. I laughed inwardly as I realized that I had just given the girl a promotion.

I was pulled out of my thoughts and so was Tsubomi's hand from mine. I looked at her, wondering what was wrong, but she turned her back at me and pretended to be looking out at sea... or she could really be looking out at sea. I leaned to one side to try and take a peak at her face, one thing I was sure of... she was quite red. _'Maybe the heat was getting to her?'_ I thought then decided to reach in for a can of soda from the Ice Box. With the a slow steady and quiet hand I was able to get the cold can just inches away from her with out her noticing, then with a light tap on her shoulder she turns her head my way and…

She jumps away and screams; **"EEEK! THAT'S COLD!!!"**

Turning my way she looks at me ready to start giving me another one of her famous lectures about being nice to other people… But then she stopped even before she began. I noticed that she noticed the can I was holding out for her, I smiled and urged for her to take it already. "…ah!… for me?" she asked. If I could speak I'd probably be saying something sarcastic right about now, but instead I'm forced to settle for a short nod.

"Thank you…" she said with a blush on her face as she took the can out of my hand. Which I thought was suspicious, but I guess I'll leave it alone… at least for now.

To my surprise Kohaku had cooked the fishes that I had caught earlier. And they were very delicious! It must have been the hard work I placed in catching them or something like that, that added a psychological factor to it's taste. What ever it was it was one of the best fish I've ever tasted.

After lunch, Tsubomi and I decided to take a walk on the beach. We then swam and played on the water after we've digested some of lunch. Then return back to the house for some home made snow cones and a fresh coat of sun-block. I fell asleep on the floor soon after consuming all the delightful flavored ice.

When I woke up, it was almost sunset. _'I must have fallen a sleep for three or four hours.'_ I thought, forgetting that there was a clock on one of the room's walls. A door slid open and as I turned my head I was surprised to see Tsubomi was wearing my old Sakura design Kimono. She noticed me look at her in surprise and instantly blushed.

"I'm just wearing it because Kohaku-san was pushy about it." She said defensively and looked away with a pout on her face.

Kohaku then came in and said; "Only because she was staring at it for quite a while."

Tsubomi blush incredibly right at that and almost dared take it off. I recalled that Kohaku mentioned a festival today and tomorrow when she picked us up yesterday afternoon. Deciding I wanted to go there, I picked up my notebook and wrote; _"Where's the red and black one I bought last time? Kohaku?"_ I showed it to Kohaku who read it in just a glance.

"I've had it ready in your room with the accessories you had bought with it. Would you like me to help you get changed?" She said and offered in a almost creepy voice and naughty sparkle in her eye. I smiled and though I can put on a Kimono on my own, I decided to accept her offer, because years ago I've learned that when Kohaku offers to do something in that tone of voice and with that look, she really wants to do it and will find someway to do it. And I'm not willing to risk letting what happened the last time I said no to her happen again…

We went up upstairs so that we could fix my hair up and change into my Kimono. It took a while to fix the dry feeling the salt water had left on my hair even though it'll only be temporary. But that would be fixed later when we bathe in our very own out door hot spring… even though it's not a real one but it's private and has good ambiance. She also decided to place a little make up on me that by the time Kohaku showed me what I looked like in the mirror… I barely recognized myself. She had tied my hair behind my back into an almost pony tail like style, using some of my hair she made it look like my hair was like a fountain coming out of bun made of hair, which was all tied up with a red and gold traditional style hair pin. But it was actually the few tones of make up that threw me off… and I have to admit, vanity aside… I do look pretty. After that she retrieved the Kimono for me and helped me into it. It was a black Kimono, adorned with feathers of reddish gold and a passing phoenix and a similar sash in reversed colors.

We came down and entered the living room where Tsubomi was enjoying the sunset and a glass of iced tea. She turned her head as soon as she heard the door open. "Ah! Sempa…i… Yo…u…'re… b…a…c…k…" she managed to say although she did it with each syllable after "pa" growing ever slower and left her mouth hanging open.

I came closer and closed it for her with my index finger. But I did it with a smile. Honestly I was quite please with her reaction… It tells me that at the very least my looks weren't the reason Hikari didn't choose me. I then wrapped an arm around hers and gently tugged at her.

"I believe Yaya-chan is saying the two of you should go. You don't want to miss too much of the festival." Said Kohaku, who seemed quite amused with Tsubomi's reaction, was hiding a smile and holding a laugh behind her kimono's sleeve and hand.

"Aren't you and Hisui-san coming?" Tsubomi asked curiously.

Kohaku gave her one of her winning smiles and replied; "We live here. We get to go to almost every festival. It's okay if Hisui and I are late or don't go… It's not like we've never been there, and we have to make preparations for dinner as well as complete a few of Yaya-chan's requests."

I panicked a little when Kohaku revealed that thing about my requests. It was something I asked Kohaku personally when I we got here, yesterday evening. I hurriedly made a 'shhh' motion towards her asking her to stop that line of thought immediately. But it was too late…

"What requests would that be, sempai…?" Tsubomi turned and looked at me with a calculating eye. All I could do was scratch my cheek with a finger and pretend to laugh. She continued to stare for a few minutes, before giving up the subject… probably realizing that it was a secret or a surprise after a deep sigh.

"Oh well… whatever… shall we get going?" she said and began leading me out, but not before Kohaku gets to hand my notebook… just in case.

It was a bit of a walk towards the town's shrine, but it was a lively and beautiful walk.

A half hour later, we reach the foot of the mountain where the shrine was. From down here we were blown away but the beautiful lights and colors that lit that mountain side. We climbed and explored each flat on the way to the top. It was full of game stalls, food shops, toys and mask stalls even fortune tellers and tiny pet shops.

I bought us some octopus balls, better known as Takoyaki, to share. We played some shooting games and dart games after. I even won us this pair of fox masks to wear like an ornament on the side of our heads. Tsubomi decided to take a fortune while I grabbed us two bundles of cotton candy. I was surprised to see her blushing harder than usual when I returned.

I handed her the other bundle after she had paid the girl outside the fortune telling tent. We ate and played some more after that. Ice creams, darts, candy apples, hoops, snow cones. I was about to point her towards another game both when I caught her eyeing the haunted house booth.

I tapped her shoulder and looked at her in what believe was a curious enough expression. I then looked and pointed at the Haunted House and looked at her again then lipped; "Wanna go?"

She blushed yet again, brought her eyes away from me and said; "I do."

'_She is really blushing to much today… I have a weird feeling about this…'_ I thought. I felt that something was up and I was about to know soon. For now I'll just have to act normal and wait for it… It'll be just too hard and too much trouble to make her tell me while I'm in this state. I nodded and placed my notebook carrying arm around her waist.

"Sempai!" she said as she tried to pry my hand and my notebook off her waist.

But I pulled her close and towards the haunted house. She stopped struggling and held on to me as soon as we entered. _'For someone who wanted to go in… she sure isn't good at tolerating scary things.'_ …which in my book makes her all the more cute and huggable!

I held her tight and closer to me as a lot of weird stuff came popping out of no where. Tsubomi screamed an awful lot from the start. I was really more surprised of Tsubomi screaming in an ever increasing volume than the sudden appearance of the fake ghosts and weird things. But after a few minutes we somehow were able to find the exit and an end to that loud and almost scary trip with Tsubomi in Haunted House booth. I treated her to some Manju and Tea to help her calm down.

We ate away from the crowded areas. There was this small place on the side of one platform that had some benches and tables, it was surrounded by a lot of trees and huge flowering bushes that made it almost private, and we were lucky to find the area completely unoccupied. Tsubomi began talking about random things… anything to keep the air from being silent aside from the traditional festival music that the shrine was playing. Which suddenly stopped… and that meant one thing in this town.

I quickly silenced Tsubomi by placing my index finger on her lips. She blushed again and was about do say or do something to show how even more bashful she was becoming when I pointed out and up to the sky. The air was silent and peaceful, the stars were beautiful, and the soft night breeze was wonderful. And then… There came more lights in the sky.

"Fireworks!" Tsubomi almost yelled out happily. I smiled as I watched the amazed look on her face as she watched the wondrous flares of light that filled the night sky. "It's beautiful…" she complemented. I nodded with my smile growing, before I resumed watching the sky.

After a few minutes… the flares were still decorating and redecorating the sky, filling the night with wondrous colors and light. I then felt Tsubomi pat my shoulder as she skid closer to me. I turned to look at her and saw something rather puzzling…

Tsubomi was looking at me, blushing, but holding a determined look on her face. "Yaya-sempai…" she said with the same feel of determination her face was giving off.

I quickly opened my notebook and scribbled _"Yes?"_

She began blushing harder, what ever she wanted to say she was being awfully shy about it… and at this point… I think I know what it is. I believe I'm not ready for it though… and Tsubomi is still so young, there will be prettier and better girls for her someday.

"Um… sempai?... I…" she said with a lot of difficulty.

'_Oh… no… here it comes…' _

"… I…"

"I…"

"Yaya-sempai…"

'_this is going to be difficult…'_ I thought. Tsubomi's actions reminded me of a really sappy manga confession, where the one who is about to confess is either having second thoughts or couldn't seem to say what he or she wants to say in fear of rejection. What I would not give to not be in this situation. At least not now, I'm not ready and Tsubomi is…

"Kiss… me?"

'_EH?! Did she just say what I think she just said.'_ I asked myself and her as I looked at her in complete shock.

"A lot of my friends already had their first kisses, even though some are just practice kisses… they're very much ahead of me." So she said, trying to explain her request to me. "I know we're not really that close but… I… umm…" she looked a little grim and sad like she knew she was digging her own grave.

I looked back at the fireworks, to think. It was tempting… after the bad kissing with Hikari and being kissed by Amane. A meaningful kiss to me seemed to have lost all meaning. What's one practice kiss? But that's the problem, what could be just a kiss to me could mean more to her. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore. Three including myself is enough… more than enough.

'_Tsubomi is a nice girl...'_

And with that my mind was made up. I flipped my notebook to another page, a clean and empty one, and wrote; _"I'm sorry."_ as neatly and large as I could, then showed it to her and looked at her directly with a weak apologetic smile.

She read it and looked away. Her tears streamed down her eyes but she quickly wiped them away. "No… I'm sorry for making such a request. It was very selfish of me." She said thru a few sobs and sniffles. "I know you already have a lot in your mind. I'm sorry! Sempai!" She began crying harder. I placed my notebook down on the bench and hugged her gently. She cried so freely and loudly that I was glad there were still fireworks making noise that was distracting everyone and anyone that could find us.

But after a long while, the fireworks died down… and so did her tears. I gently rubbed her back and brushed her hair, to calm her down. I wanted to do more, say more… but that was all I could think of.

"Sempai…" She called my attention. I looked down at her and watched her wipe away some tears. She looked up at me and looked at me straight in my eye, I could not and dare not break.

She swallowed softly, I could feel her shiver a little. Most likely nervous, maybe even scared of what may happen when she says what she's about to say. "…For what it's worth…" she paused and took a deep breath.

I continued to look at her. I could feel my heart was beating quite fast, it was almost painful… _'the suspense is killing me.'_ I thought, but at the same time… a part of me wished that she wouldn't say it

"please don't say it…" I mouthed to her and hoped that she understood me.

But… didn't reach her…

"I really like you… Yaya…-sempai." Fresh tears fell from her eyes and ran across her cheeks. But she continued looking at me not hindered or annoyed by her tears and waited for a response.

Though I was expecting it… I must say, I'm very surprised. Just weeks ago, who would have thought that she could possibly like me? I knew or at least had a feeling that she had feelings for Hikari as well. The way she always tries to get between us, separate us, make me do things I don't like even if it's part of the choir, reminding me things to do that I've decided to skip entirely… just so that she could be with Hikari.

'_Who would have thought?'_ I asked myself again, as a looked at her desperate face.

I mouthed a clear and readable "I'm sorry." and looked away.

"It's… ok..ay…" she said with a tearful voice. She sniffed and started to cry again. To my surprise, she pushes herself away from me, gets up and runs away.

"Tsubomi!" I tried to yell… almost begging my voice to come back. But nothing came. I decided to run after her.

She had a head start; running down the stairs of the mountain shrine wasn't easy… especially in a Kimono. I was surprised to see that she was already two platforms down. I quickly pulled the leg portions of my Kimono to give me room to run and with all my strength ran after her.

She reached the foot of the mountain, but instead of turning and running on the sidewalk she headed for the street. To her surprise and shock, a car horn screamed out for her to get out of the way. I don't know what happened but she didn't move. I don't know what happened, but I suddenly found myself running faster towards her… screaming; **"TSUBOMI!!"**

I quickly grabbed hold of the light post on the side of the street, took her hand and used the inertia that I had built up to sling us back to into the street where I wrapped my arms around her instinctively to protect her from the hitting the concrete floor.

The car continued to drive away, but it was the last thing on my mind.

"Sempai?" Tsubomi looked at me with scared but thankful eyes. And as much as I wanted to just hug her and tell her that she's safe... something else came out;

I slapped her cheek with my right hand and yelled out. "**BAKA!! What do you think you're doing?! You could have been killed?!"** I was angry, a little frustrated, hyper, adrenaline pumped and just glad she was safe, but that didn't mean she wasn't getting a lecture from me. **"What the hell am I supposed to tell your parents if that car hit you?! I'm sorry, **You daughter threw her life away on our little escape trip because I rejected her?!"

I was beginning to calm down, though as I was still yelling and lecturing the seemingly stunned girl I knew the adrenaline and the anger was beginning to die down. And I realized that she was looking at me, in a way that I believed one being lectured wasn't suppose to… so I asked; **"What?"**

"Sem-sempai…" she pointed at me as she stuttered with her words… "Your Voice…"

"**What about it?!"** I yelled back.

"It's… back…"

"**Eh?!"** It took her mentioning that fact, before I realized it. I could speak again.

"My Voice is back…?" I asked myself as a test. And hearing the sound of my own voice, made me quite happy that I yelled it out again.

"**MY VOICE IS BACK!"**

I hugged Tsubomi happily as I bounced up and down, laughing a bit louder than I expected as I did.

"AH?" I then realized that we were being watched… Quite a number of people have gathered to check what was going on and gossiping. I took Tsubomi's hand and said… "I think I've embarrassed us enough… head go back." And without waiting for her response I began leading her away from the shine's foot and the crowd.

We remained silent on the walk back. We ended up walking on the beach, it wasn't crowded one least bit and we could have a little privacy… To my surprise, she showed no sign of struggling away from my grasp… I took a little peek at her from the corner of my eye and saw her holding her reddening cheek with her free hand. I sort of regretted doing that. I just can't control my anger sometimes. But what matters is that she's safe. But this trip isn't going to be comfortable for either of us if I don't do something to fix it.

And with that in mind I called to her;

"Tsubomi…"

"Sempai…"

She called me, surprisingly at the same time… we surprised each other and quitted down again. I noticed a blush form on her face and honestly… I think I was too.

I stopped walking and turned to her. "You can go ahead, Tsubomi-chan…" I told her, before she had the chance to say the same for me.

She nodded but kept her eyes away from my face. I knew that it's not because she was being insincere, it was because she wouldn't be able to say it directly if she looked at me. "Um… I wanted to thank you. For saving my life."

I smiled… whatever negative feelings I was holding dissipated after hearing those words. "You're welcome, Tsubomi-chan. And I'm sorry for slapping you so hard." I accepted her gratitude and apologized to her, while gently holding her slightly swollen and very red cheek.

She winced a little at my touch. "I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble sempai…" She looked up at me with watery eyes and a soft smile.

I stretched my arms around her and gave her a hug. "shhh… It's alright. I'm just glad you're fine."

"Thank You. Sempai!" She returned my embrace by wrapping her arms around my waist. She cried again on my chest.

We stayed there for a while. Two girls, by the beach, sharing an embrace in my kimonos, under the moon lit sky, beside the cool sea, engulf by the soft sea breeze and sharing each other's warmth. This went on for about a half hour until I decided to break the silence.

"Tsubomi…" I called her softly. Dropping the childish honorific to tell her I'm serious.

She looks at me, almost scared of what I'm about to say. "Yes? Sempai?"

For a short moment I had second thoughts about asking her this, but in the end my curiosity won over what little morals I had.

"Why did you want me to kiss you?" I asked her quite bluntly.

Her eyes opened wide and her whole face glowed red upon hearing my question and looked away obviously shy. I brushed her hair gently, hoping that I could calm her down enough so that she'd answer me. She gave me a very short and shy glace, before looking away again saying; "I told you why…"

"I see…" I said, and sighed deeply.

I raised my hand and cupped her undamaged cheek. She shivered and stiffened at the touch, but soon relax and leaned on it. I tilted her head so that she would be looking at me again. I then said in a soft, apologetic and trying to be comforting voice; "You're still young Tsubomi… You'll meet someone better."

She began looking more depressed when she heard that, she did her best so that her eyes looked away… far way from me. "I don't want to…" she said a bit angrily with a small pout.

I ignored her words, I continued; "And that someone will fall for you… Treat you like you're the best thing that happened to her."

But again she said in an angry tone; "I don't care…"

"She'll tell you that you're beautiful." I added, almost meaning what I said.

"I'd rather be called cute…" but yet again she shrugged of my words… I was very surprised that she preferred to be called cute.

I made one last try and told her this; "…and that she'll love you. Forever…"

"I'll just break her heart." She said angrily as she pushed herself away from me and walked a few steps into the water, which soaked my old kimono up to the knee.

I frowned at the sight… not that my kimono was ruined, but rather because the girl wasn't willing to listen to me. But then again… I can't really blame her. If reason and logic were enough to convince a person in and out of love, then I probably wouldn't have to suffer so much myself.

I sighed and smiled at her back. To be honest… I was impressed of this girl.

Grabbing her arm gently, I forcefully turned her towards me. Looked at her straight in the eye and said… "I don't have feelings for you. Tsubomi."

She looked at me strongly and proudly all of a sudden, that made me wonder if I had the wrong girl there for a second. And the she said in a strong and confident voice; "Not yet."

'_Not yet?'_ I repeated to myself. "What?... You'll make me fall for you?" I asked her with a curious and sly eye. Not to mention a smile.

And without a second thought, she answered me immediately; "Eventually!"

"Really?" I asked her testing and teasingly, raising a brow in question and awe at the girl.

"I definitely will!" she said as she looked at me with a strong smile, confident eyes, and convincing voice.

"And you'll hurt and cry if I reject you…" I told her; true, sad and bluntly.

"I can… take it. Until you say yes." For a moment her words gave a sign of weakness, but to be honest… I expected her to show more. I raised my other hand and lightly pinched her slap swollen cheek, which caused her to scream out a loud and a bit playful; **"OW!"**

I frowned a little and told her; "It'll hurt more than that… Tsubomi."

Her pained face faded almost immediately. Though her eyes were streaming with tears, she resumed eye contact with me and I could feel her confidence, pride and determination from just that. But it was what she said that got me.

"I don't care… I love you. Yaya"

I don't remember how she said it. But then again I didn't care. She said it… that was what was important to me. It convinced me to do one thing for her…

Still holding her cheeks, I began to lean and closer towards her slowly closing my eyes. I didn't matter if I couldn't see… I knew where I was going. In seconds, I felt it… Tsubomi's soft lips. I kissed her gently slowly moving my hands from her face to her neck and back. She stiffened and shivered at first but that soon passed. She slowly wrapped her arms around my neck and very eagerly returned the kiss and even dared being adventurous enough to slip in her tongue for an even deeper kiss… one that I allowed and returned in kind.

It was beyond anything I've felt before, and though there was no love from my side… It certainly didn't bother me or my partner one bit. If anything the kiss grew wilder and wilder. I could feel her touching me in places that I'd rather not mention… but know that it felt incredibly good.

Kissing her was sweet… or should I say she tasted sweet. It could have been all the candy and sweets we have been eating. But this was something I'll remember. That unlike Hikari's, whose flavor I never had the chance to learn and Amane's who I'll only bitterly remember as the taste of my own blood… Tsubomi's was special.

'_It was sweet. Very sweet.'_

It was wonderful, if anything… I almost wished that this was my first kiss all over again. The passion and feelings that Tsubomi was sending to me from just one long, wet and steamy kiss… was almost too much for one broken hearted teen to take.

In the end, I have no idea what time it was…

…or how long the kiss lasted…

…or who broke it…

…or how we ended on the sand with our legs getting wet and with her on top of me…

…

But I was sure of one thing. Although I do not love her… I certainly wouldn't mind to… someday…

**To be continued…**

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Author's Notes**: YEAH!!! I hope all the Yaya x Tsubomi fans will enjoy this chapter very much. I worked very hard to get this one done! Hehe! But wow… my target was 10k words but man I reached 11k. High five anyone? Oh the next one will be a little delayed. I want to write and finish chapter two of Opposites Attract in a few days. Then take a break from Strawberry Panic and write my Murder Princess, Soukou no Strain or Nanoha StrikerS fic…

One of them! Not all! Don't worry! I just want a small break from Strawberry Panic and get something else done X3

Oh yeah… Special guest cameo done by the twin maid sisters from "Tsukihime" Hisui and Kohaku. And a little note as to why I prefer cameos as to making up my own character: Well personally, I prefer bringing characters from other animes (especially other Yuri animes) specially my favorite ones because like the main characters, I like writing about them. This would make the story more appealing and fun to me and other readers who have seen them before. To those that haven't I've written about them in a way that doesn't bring too much spoilers about them or make them too out of character. Now if you don't like that, my dear readers… I'm sorry but I won't stop doing so. It's just too much fun! XD

And to those that don't seem to like the fans… well I wrote about it for fun ok? Oo;; and believe I have said this on a previous author's note but I'll say it just in case I didn't… I exaggerated on those parts with the fans ok? And besides, for all you know I could have made Rin lie about some of the things that she said about the fans. Exaggerating and stuff in annoyance and a little spite. Haha so… yeah… don't take it too hard. It's just a fan fic… My FAN FIC! XD and yeah... they'll appear again.

Btw someone, I believe it was Syaoran, told me that the link to this fic was posted in 4chan. Haha I saw it btw thanks. Too bad it was gone after a few days. I wasn't able to save the pictures. I was surprised at how many people are for Tsubomi than Hikari. OOa…


	15. Chapter X: Tsubomi

Disclamier: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. TT;; (poor me… lol)

**Author's Notes: **I apologize for the huge delay on posting. I had been busy, occupied, feeling under creative and even sick. And aside that maybe a little sad that the last chapter didn't get as many reviews had wanted… but oh well that's life! Right?! XD

I would like to thank _**IzanagiMikoto**_ for helping me revise Amane's chapters a little and for the greet reader's insights that helped with the revision.

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 10: Tsubomi: Won't you accept my feelings?**

"I don't care… I love you. Yaya."

I said it… I've finally said it! After hiding my feelings from her for almost a year; pretending to like the same girl she did, hiding my true affections from her like she did to Hikari-sempai… and for the same reason. But that changed when I heard her voice again. But was not her voice that gave me hope, it was the very first word she spoke since she lost her voice. It was my name!

I struggled to maintain my posture, despite being tired from all the fun we've been having all day, because I had to show her that I was serious. I studied her face, she looked stunned mostly. But then her eyes softened and I was sure that I saw Yaya-sempai's most beautiful smile. She closed her eyes and slowly lowered her face towards mine and kissed me. I stiffened in surprise at first and for some reason my body shivered wildly, but in a good way.

I had been dreaming of this moment for a long time… but no amount of dreaming or wild fantasy could have prepared me. And I think no amount of practice kisses could have prepared my heart for what happened next.

I suddenly felt a draft of the cool beach air teasing my soft and exposed skin. Looking down, I realized that Yaya-sempai had undone my sash and opened the front of my Kimono.

"Sempai!?! We can't!..." I called out to her in a loud panic.

But she just looked at me with her piercing yet gentle amber eyes that would probably sooth a wild angry bear. She gently slides her arms over and around my naked waist pulling me close to her in a very sensual way.

"Fufu You said you love me didn't you Tsubomi…?" She asked in the most seductive voice, that I thought my nose was going to start bleeding.

"I do, and I did but…" I answered her with an almost shaky voice.

"No buts Tsubomi… " She then kissed me again; this time on my forehead, then on my nose, then on each cheek, before kissing my lips again. Her feather light hands pass everywhere caressing my whole body, tickling and pleasing my entire being. I could feel myself melting in her arms.

"Sempai… Take me…" I openly begged her.

"Of course, my little…" she said as she looked at me with eyes that melted me from the inside out… but then those same eyes looked like they were burning with rage and all of a sudden she yelled; **"BAKA!!!"**

"EH?!" I felt like I was falling… and I was. "OW!" I hit the solid wooden floor of the room in sempai's private beach house. It was bright when I opened my eyes. I looked around and saw Yaya-sempai holding the blanket, the one I was just using, tightly as she stood on the other side of the bed of which I had fallen off so ungracefully. She had a light blush on her face but looked at me angrily.

"Good Morning… sempai, what's wrong? You look angry." I asked her cautiously, deciding to stay where I was on the floor for safety.

She closes her eyes and lets out a sigh. "You know Tsubomi… I'm flattered that you like me enough to be having wet dreams about me and all, but could you at least wait till we're where I can't legally invade your privacy?"

I swear that almost fainted when all my blood rushed into my head. And for a while I was incapable of coherent thought. But then my cheeks screamed with pain and I realized that Yaya-sempai was pinching my cheeks.

"Oi… Tsu! Bo! Mi! Wake up!" she said in a semi-playful manner.

"Ahch… Shem-pieh… tasht hursht." I said in an incoherent voice, thanks to her pinching and pulling my cheeks apart.

"Are you awake now?" she asked me. I quickly nodded before she let go of my stinging face.

"Ow… ow… ow… Yaya-sempai that was mean." I said my pains without thinking.

She then stands up and said; "You should get ready, we're going to town for breakfast and shopping." completely ignoring my pain. 'Why did I fall for this person again?' I asked myself… and oddly I couldn't answer my own question.

"Oi! Tsubomi!" she called in an almost annoyed tone.

"Ye-Yi-Yes sempai?" I stuttered instinctively feeling a little pressure and a tad bit of fear.

"Did you hear me? Or do I need to pull on your face again?" she threatened me with both her hands up with both index finger and thumb doing a crab pincher like motion.

I instinctively placed my hands on my cheeks to defend them from her threatening pinch. Not wanting her do to do again I stood up and raced to the bathroom. "I heard you!"

Her bathroom like almost everything else in the house was in Traditional Japanese. It kind of reminds me of those private baths or hot springs that my sister drags me along to during summer vacations, just because she wants to experience what she sees in Anime shows. _'Anyway I should get ready… I don't want Yaya to get anymore impatient with me than she already is...'_

Bathing here was different, but in a way relaxing… but for someone in a hurry this isn't the place to be. All I really wanted was to have a simple cold shower. Anyway… I made the best of what I had, which was; a faucent, a small wooden bucket, some soap, a face towel, and a hot spring like bathtub. Needless to say I felt very clean when I was done.

A bathrobe was waiting for me and apparently another set of Yaya-sempai's old clothes. It was probably Kohaku-san who placed them there… she apparently gave sempai that habit of wanting to dress people up, _'or could it be the other way around?'_ Anyway now is not the time to think about that… I have to rush and get changed before sempai gets impatient enough to…

"OI! TSUBOMI! Aren't you done yet?!" she yelled outside the bathroom door.

'_yell at me again…'_ I whispered to myself as I heard my beloved sempai's voice. I opened the door and said; "I was about to come out."

She looks at me with a tiny pout that most people would probably never notice and said; "Ara… That looks cute on you."

I looked down and remembered that I was wearing her clothes. I could feel myself beginning to blush, but then suddenly my eye caught her hands suddenly rise and I found mine rushing to cover my cheeks. She laughed quite happily before telling me to hurry up.

"But what about my hair?" I asked.

"Just bring a towel and comb, let's do it in the car." She ordered and headed out for the door without giving me any time to answer.

I rushed to get a brush, a small towel and my hair band. The rest was pretty much as anyone would guess; I rush to the car, Hisui-san bids us goodbye, Kohaku-san steps on the gas and we rush into town. Sempai does my hair for me; drying and brushing it. I expected her to toy around with me like pull my hair around or something just to tease me… bust she was unexpectedly gentle. I guess that's one thing I like about her… she's full of surprises.

We arrive into town and Kohaku-san drops us off at a cafe. She tells us that she's going to be shopping for dinner and supplies, then hands Yaya-sempai a cell phone to call her with if we needed something or we were done. We were soon seated waited on. I ordered some omelet dish, which name I can pronounce, while sempai asked for some dish that made a bowl of soup of a big round bread.

We ate in silence for a while. I found myself glancing at her and watching her eat in secret while my thoughts recalled what happened last night…

"I love you. Yaya." I confessed to her… quite straightforwardly. I had made up mind after having a glimpse of hope of hearing my name come from her lips. I kept my teary eyes on her, looking at her beautiful amber eyes. I felt a small shiver creep up my spine when I saw her close her eyes. She leaned closer and kissed me. For a moment, I thought it was a dream. I've had similar dreams before, but it had never been this warm or sweet before.

I wrapped my arms around her neck and kissed her back, my mind screaming; _'Sempai's Lips! I'm kissing sempai and she's kissing me!'_ I felt so happy, that I instinctively slid my tongue thinking that it was alright. I was surprised that she slid her tongue in too… but very happy. I couldn't help but feel like she was mine and touch her almost everywhere I could reach.

My knees felt week, like it was melting off my legs. But sempai saves me and slowly falls back into the sand, not breaking our kiss. It was easier for me to kiss her this way, I was shorter than her after all so I had trouble giving it my all. I kissed her like it was the last kiss like it would be our last kiss and that everything depended on this one kiss. I had to show her and make her feel my love for her isn't the rebound or puppy love that I believe she thinks it is. Tongue, hands, teeth, legs, lips, body… I used them all hoping that she'll answer my feelings soon.

After what seemed like an eternity, I broke the kiss… And I was surprised at how fast my heart was still beating. It felt like forever since I last breathed. I was panting heavily, but sempai wasn't… I wonder if she had kissed before? Or was she just really a good kisser?

I stared at her from under me. Our faces just less than a foot away and a second kiss felt oh so tempting. She was blushing softly, her face lightly bathing in the soft moonlit sky. She smiled and her eyes softened. I realized that her hands were around my waist, holding on to me with a gentle wanting.

"How was it?" she asked breaking our silence.

I was still half dazed from the kiss that I barely heard her. "uh… It was… Great! I'll remember it forever."

"I see… that's good then." She said softly and looked at me. But it felt like she was looking at something else, her smile disappeared and her eyes slightly lost it's glow.

"...Yaya? Are you ok?" I asked worriedly.

"…" But she didn't answer me immediately. I was about to say something and call her attention again. But I felt it, she was looking at me again… with a soft sad glow in her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Tsubomi." She said to me as she raised her right hand and gently cupped my face.

"…for what?" I asked, trying to keep as much of my worry away from my voice as I could.

"I can't be your Yaya. My heart just isn't ready yet." It was a little painful to hear, but it wasn't a complete rejection. She did say 'yet'… maybe I had a chance later. I smiled and cupped the hand the hand that cupped my face.

"I'll wait for you sempai." I told her in the same way I confessed to her.

"You won't know how long that'll take." said sadly and concerned, but it only fueled my itching desire to comfort her and be there for her... and tell her that everything will be alright.

"I don't care." I told her bluntly.

"And who's to say that I'll fall for you for sure?" she mentioned with an uncertain voice.

I smiled and said; "Don't worry about it. That's my problem."

"But?!" she tried to reason with me. But I don't want to hear it… and I have a feeling she wants me to stop her too.

"Sempai!" I called her with a strict tone.

"Yeah?" she asked with a curious worried tone.

"I don't care…" I told her again, with the same blunt tone as before.

A small smile crept up her lip and she gave me a look that told me she thinks I'm being corny. "You better not confess again."

"I love you." But I did, forgetting and not caring one bit if I sounded corny.

She lets out a small giggle and said; "It sounds a little corny the second time."

"Yaya…" I kissed her again. But this time it was a simpler kiss; no tongue, no teeth and barely touching her.

"What no tongue?" she said sarcastically with a crooked brow.

"Oh you want tongue?! I'll give you a tongue!" I said before I licked her left cheek from her chin up to the side of her eye.

She shivered and screamed; "EEEEEEEKKK!!!" with a sense of seduction and very slight disgust. "Don't you ever do that again!" she yelled and wiped her cheek with her kimono's sleeve.

"Heh! What are you going to do?!" I said smugly, I was trying to taunt her into doing something but what that was would be out of my control and I would never have though she'd do what she did.

"This!" She pulls me down bites my neck sharply at first, causing me to scream out loud; "AAAACCCCKK!!!" but after a few moments she licked and sucked my skin while still playfully keeping her teeth clasping on my delicate flesh that made me moan uncontrollably.

There were a few more playful and almost childish acts that one could almost consider as foreplay before we found ourselves lying on our backs on the beach's sand watching the moon. Actually… I was watching her watch the moon, her eyes looked really beautiful right then. I lost my self in though for a while, and when I realized I did… it was sempai who was watching me instead. I opened my mouth to say something, but she beats me to it.

"I'm sorry, Tsubomi." She says again.

And this time as painful as it was I decided to let things go for a while. I nod and told her; "it's ok, sempai."

"Yaya." she said, confusing me for a moment.

"Eh?"

"You can call me Yaya when we're alone…" she paused as she looked liked she noticed her face blush up a very bright red hue. "…that is if you really want to!" she finished, without looking at me eye to eye.

"Sure! Yaya I'd love to."

She just smiles and stands before offering me her hand. I take it and she pulls me up from the sand. We dust ourselves up before heading back to her beach house in silence. Oh and Hisui almost fainted when Yaya yelled "I'm home." when we got back.

A loud 'Whappak!' could be heard in the restaurant as a half inch thick menu book was slapped on to my head.

"Ow ow ow… not again…"

"Oi! Tsubomi!!" then came screeching of the one voice I'll never mistake for anyone else.

"Huh?" I looked at her blankly.

She pointed at my plate which was still very full. "Are you ok? You're meal is going cold you know."

"Ah! I'm sorry. I got lost in thought." I apologized and began wolfing down my meal

Sempai made a few comments about my eating being un-lady like, which caused me to slow down to a more normal pace. We talked about other stuff for a while. Something that she and I have never done before because of the friction I made between us. We even shared desserts which I must say tasted even better than I believe they should.

After breakfast we walked around town, were we sampled a few local treats and looked for souvenirs to bring everyone we know back in school. I was browsing over some small trinkets such as pendants, key chains and the likes when I noticed sempai looking at some small figurines. I walked closer to check up on her, but immediately stopped when I saw that she was holding figurine of an angel in one hand and a prince on a white horse in another. The sight was more than enough to bring more than a dozen questions to my mind.

I slowly approached her slowly enough for her to notice me rather than get startled.

"Ah! Tsubomi. Are you done choosing?"

"Not yet."

"Well don't take too much your time and don't worry about the money."

I just nodded and looked at the figurines she was holding, trying to figure out how to phrase my question.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her voice had a light hint of worry in them

"Yaya?" I called her attention and looked at her with curious eyes.

She blinked a few times, probably shocked by my sudden seriousness. "Yes?"

"What are you think about when you were looking at those?" I asked and motioned the ceramic figures that she was holding.

"Ah these?... I was thinking of getting something for Ootori." She said smiling as she lifted them beside her face.

"Eh?!" I almost screamed out.

"What is with that unbelieving look?!" she yelled looking annoyed.

"I thought you hated her?" I reasoned to her.

"I hate her for choosing Hikari! How could she if I was around?!" she asked, as she angrily looked at the prince figure.

The shock of hearing something that contradicted all my observations of her for the year caused me to yell out; **"WHAT?!!!!" **

"I love her! But never showed it once! Because I was too shy!" she placed the prince figure closer to her face and acted all 'lovey dovey' with it.

The sight made me want to hurl. "No way… You Love Ootori-sama?!! You've got to be kidding me!!!" I said almost yelling at her.

Her expression instantly deadpanned and she looked at me then said; "Yep!"

"EH?!" I asked dumbfounded.

"You thought I was serious?" she asked with a nearly expressionless face.

"…" I nodded frantically at her with a shocked expression stuck on my face.

"No way that's going to happen you know… she barely has anything that suits my tastes." She said as she pouted a little at me that probably said I was being stupid.

"Then you're kidding about hating her?" I asked really confused.

"Oh no… I do… but honestly, should I be?… It's not like it was her fault she fell for Hikari… nor was it her fault that Hikari had feelings for her." She reason with a happy voice that echoed something sad into my heart.

I looked at the things in her hand again and asked, pointing them; "Then? That's…"

"A peace offering!" She said with a bright smile. I would never have thought that sempai was capable of making up with people she hated. But then again I never would have thought that what happened last night was really possible either…

She then cut me off from my thoughts by asking; "What do you think I should get?"

"…hmmm… let's see." I looked at the figurines for a bit and checked around the rest of the other figures if she had chosen the ones that looked the best. I then told her what I thought; "I think you should give her the Angel. And give Hikari-sempai the prince."

"Yeah… I thought so too." She said and added it to her shopping basket.

We then continued looking around. I was surprised at what lengths she did to make sure that I got a lot of things for my friends and classmates. We made sure to add our friends from Miator and Lilum too.

By about 3pm we had to call Kohaku-san to pick up the things we bought so that we can look around and have some fun. We played around some fair games that were around town, ate small local treats here and there, we even played like kids in the park and had ice cream. It felt like a date to me… We even had our picture taken by one of those machines that makes sticker pictures. 'I wish this day would never end.'

She then lead me to a fancy clothing store, which sold clothes that had price tags that made me feel dizzy. But she then hands be four sets of clothes; first was in pink peach, another in red, and one in black.

"Eh? Sempai what am I supposed to do?" I asked, even if I didn't have to. I knew perfectly well why…

"Isn't that obvious?" she said smugly.

I looked at her with a blank accusing face and said; "I'm going to be your dress up doll again aren't I?"

"You got it!" she exclaimed happily.

I let out a sigh after her happy remark. I had a feeling that she was going to buy whatever it was I chose. And although I don't want her to spend money on me… sempai would probably find ways to force me into it. With that I resigned myself to my fate and headed to the changing room. And I was about to change when sempai knocked from the other side of the door and said; "Tsubomi, wear the one you want out ok?!"

"Ok." I replied and sighed. I felt a little sorry for myself… why did I have to bow to her whims.

Anyway I decided to try the clothes on seeing as I have little choice in the mater. I decided to go for the red one first. It was a simple red evening dress that had no sleeves, an adjustable top and just enough frilliness to make it look cute and though I must say it looked good on me… I lacked some 'assets' to make the dress work for me.

I moved on to the peach one… it was a one shoulder dress that showed more than it's fare share of skin here and there. Sempai had probably placed that there to embarrass me… and it worked quite well.

Lastly came black… Black was never my color, which made me wonder why sempai thought I'd look good in it. But surprisingly, sempai had an eye for beauty… I looked good in the black night gown she had chosen, the matching gloves that reached passed my elbows and black ribbon or bandana scarf looked so cute that I thought of giving black a second chance in my wardrobe.

It had been a few minutes since I had entered the changing room to try the dresses. I came out wearing the black dress and held my things in my hand. Looking around I saw no sign of Yaya-sempai. But then a guy wearing a black tuxedo came up to me and to my surprise… it wasn't a guy at all… with that figure it was impossible to pass for a guy. The person walked up to me; with her raven hair tied behind the neck, a white rose on the chest pocket and a black tinted glasses that hid the her amber eyes.

"Yo! Tsubomi! Do I look good or what?!"

I blushed as I examined her from her hair to her shoes… She looked good... wait not just 'good', the sophisticated guy look seemed to fit her. No matter how odd that sounded. I wanted to say that she looked great… however I was to tongue tied to do so and could only give her a nervous swallow and frantic nodding.

"Hehe! You look great too! Tsubomi-chan!"

My heart raced when I heard the honorific she used. Yaya-sempai never uses honorifics, except 'sama' and she usually means it in a sarcastic way. I was so shocked that I stuttered the tiny word over and over. "…chan-chan-chan-chan…"

She walked up to me and pulled me close to her and hugged me softly. She then whispered to me; "For at least tonight, Tsubomi. I'll try to forget about Hikari."

"Sempai…" I called out to her feeling very emotional.

"Yaya." She whispered to correct me. I smiled and felt oddly warm, it maybe just for the night. But these definitely says I had some sort of chance, or at least that what I'd like to think.

"Yaya-san."

"Yes?"

"Tha-thank you."

"You're welcome." She said before she gave me a light kiss on the cheek. "Now let's get you a matching pair shoes and purse." She turned and was about to walk away to another section.

"You! You don't have to!" I absently muttered. To be honest I was feeling anxious about being given free and very expensive things.

She walked up to me again and once again pulled me close to her. "Tsubomi-chan…" she whispered in a voice that brought pleasant shiver down my spine.

"Y-y-yes?!" I stuttered answering her, feeling nervous thanks to that shiver.

She eyed me with a sad smile and said; "Are you trying to make your one night girlfriend look bad?"

I looked away guiltily; "N-n-no…"

"Good…" She then let me towards the shoe section and brought me some shoes to choose from. And in the end she even had my hair done in a fancy style in a salon a few shops away from the clothing store.

It was getting dark and sempai, but no matter how dark it was… it couldn't possibl hide the blush that was on my face right then. Sempai calls a cab and gives a name of some place that was really hard to pronounce.

We rode in silence, if there was any sound in the car it was the engine and my heart pounding quite loudly thanks to the way sempai held my hand. She looks at me from time to time and only to look away to check if the driver was going the right way. It was half an hour drive and to my surprise it was some big place in a secluded area. Sempai gets out first and opens the door for me before paying the driver.

"Tsubomi." She said as she motioned for me to hold on to her arm. I nodded with a happy smile and held her on to her arm entrusting myself to her. She leads the way and was about to open the door for me but the doors suddenly opened for us and revealed a lot of women in foreign maid uniforms bowing their heads to us.

"Welcome!" they all greeted in synch, that left me speechless.

Sempai lead me inside and I couldn't help but be stunned at seeing the inside of the restaurant! It was so… 'Classy!' I felt like some poor country girl just standing inside. A young lady who looked like she was the head maid came towards us and greeted sempai with a very royal bow.

"Welcome back, Yaya-hime-sama." She said in a tone that matched the elegant bow she gave sempai.

'_Wait…'_ "HIME!?!" I absently exclaimed in surprise and looked at sempai.

She looked back at me with a weird guilty smile. "Hehehe… this is one of father's restaurants. He made sure they knew who I was and to always greeted me that way."

"And you didn't ask them to stop… why?" I asked, because last I checked… sempai didn't like being called sama or ojou-sama.

She then gave me bright smile. "Because it's fun once in a while."

"uh…huh…" if this was an anime, I would have had the biggest sweat drop emoticon over my head just then.

"But you know… if you're dressed like that maybe we should call you Yaya-ouji-sama." The lady commented.

Sempai let out an amused laugh before answering. "Sure if you call her my guest Tsubomi here my princess for the night."

"Of course…" She bowed to me and said; "Welcome Tsubomi-hime-sama, Yaya-ouji-sama. We have your table ready as per your requests."

'_requests?'_ I thought wondering what Yaya-sempai had in store for me tonight. It's funny how that word bothered me more than being called 'hime-sama'.

Sempai suddenly pulls me closer to her and tells the lady; "Thank you. We're looking forward to it." completely ignoring my heavy blushing… which she was probably causing on purpose.

We were then lead to another hall that screamed 'Classy! Grande Size!' I can hardly believe that this was real, everything looked so bright, clean and sparkly. We were given a table in the middle of everything. The room was mostly candle lit and there was a small orchestra playing some soft classing music. There were a few tables but only one had a light, which was curious and nerve wrecking in a way.

Sempai presented my seat for me, I wasn't sure weather to blush or cry. She seats me before taking her own seat. One maid steps forward and hands us a menu while dictating some specials dishes. I wasn't sure of what to order, actually other than the drinks… nothing on the menu made sense to me. "Yaya-san."

"Yes Tsubomi-chan?"

"Can you order for me? I have no idea what's good." She smiles and nods at my request and orders something.

"What would you like to drink? Tsubomi-chan?"

"Anything you're having…"

"hmmm…" she looked at me naughtily before turning her attention to the maid/waitress and ordered; "We'll both have the lover's shake then."

I swear I blushed so hard I felt dizzy again. I know that sempai noticed it because she snickered behind her menu. She most likely even planned all of it. But I suppose it's not so bad… it was very flattering too in a way.

The maid soon left and headed someone, I presume towards the kitchen to place our orders. Another maid came and gave us some water in those really beautifully crystal clear glasses. To my surprise the orchestra started playing a piece. I think it's the atmosphere, I'm not very used to it and it's making me jumpy.

Sempai then stood from her seat and came to my side of the table. She bowed lightly and extended her hand to me and then asked me; "May I have this dance?"

"I don't know how to dance, Yaya-san."

"Neither do I. We could just stand there and sway to the music's rhythm." I couldn't possibly deny her… actually even if I said no she'd find a way to get me to do what she want's so what's the point of resisting too much. I nodded and took her hand allowing her to lead me to the spotlight lit dance floor.

As she said she just held each other and swayed to the music. It felt nice and fun… it was a shame that neither of us could really dance. "We should try getting dance lessons… this is kind of fun." I told her.

She smiled and I could see it in her eyes, that she was interested as well. "Yeah! Why not? We could drop by Miator's dance club and ask for a few lessons."

"You think they'll teach us?" I asked. I always thought that when in came to school, sports and clubs Miator and Spica don't really mix well.

"I'm not really sure, but if not we could take weekend lessons at the town or something." Sempai is really the type who thinks and plan… but why is she so forgetful in school? Or is she the type that forgets things she has little interest on? Come to think of it… I've never seen her grades before; I should ask how well she does someday.

After a few minutes of dancing we decided to stop making fools out of ourselves and sit down again. Dinner soon came. I soon learned that sempai had gotten us a 6 course meal. We started of with a salad, and then a soup, followed by a fish dish, then a light desert, last was a steak dish, before the real desert. It was all so very tasty and very filling for me… but sempai didn't seem as full though.

We talked while we ate, mostly about the things we saw today and the things we do. I made sure that I didn't touch anything that would trigger conversations that would lead to Hikari-sempai or Ootori-sama and I was glad that it seems that she did too.

All in all the evening was great. A little embarrassing considering I was feeling a little out of place and the person I was with was cross dressing at the moment. But it was still great. Sempai then signed something, probably the bill for everything she asked tonight. I hope she never shows it to me.

She stands and comes to my side of the table again. She offers me a hand to assist me out of my chair before leading me outside arm in arm. She dials something on her phone and calls Kohaku-san again. I thought that our date was over.

She brings me to this beautiful garden lit only by the moon and candle lamps. There was a fountain that wonderfully reflected the lights in the middle. I was so absorbed looking around that I had forgotten about sempai for a few moments… that is until she pulled close to her and held me from behind.

"Yaya-san?!" I called out in surprise.

"I'm sorry, Tsubomi…" she whispered as she lowered her head so that it hanged lightly on my left shoulder. "…I've always wanted to do something like this, and I used you because you were there."

'_She felt guilty about doing this?'_ that thought was almost impossible seeing as how much she enjoyed making me play along with everything. But it wasn't bad… I was actually quite fun if I gave it a chance. And I am able to make sempai accept my feelings, I'm sure she'll be doing all this and more when that time comes. I lightly leaned my head onto hers and said; "It's alright sempai… I love you, I don't mind."

"You're only making me feel more guilty about it." Her hold tightened a little, I could tell that she really felt guilty about it. That I was for this night Hikari-sempai's substitute.

I gently placed my hands on hers and locked my fingers onto hers, hoping that she'd take even a little comfort in my words and gesture. "That wasn't my intention."

"I know." she barely whispered and I felt a tear drop moisten my exposed shoulder.

I turned a little to my left just enough to see her face clearly. She tried desperately to hold her tears… but I know that all she really wanted was to cry. I turned to face her and had enough… I raised my hands and pulled her head close to me and hugged her. "It's ok sempai. Cry all you want."

And she did… she let go of her restraint and pride, to cry on my shoulders. She held me tightly and almost painfully but I did not mind. In a way she was crying for me too. I believed or I'd like to believe that she wants to accept my love, but can't because she is having hard time getting over another. I smiled and just held her tightly, trying to comfort her and hope that some day my persistence and patience pays off. She stopped crying after a while but didn't let go which I didn't mind because I felt oddly comfortable in her arms.

I didn't notice that someone was there in the garden with us until it she spoke. "Yaya-chan, Tsubomi-chan. Are you ready to go?" It was Kohaku-san.

"Uh… we're…" I was about to say that sempai might not be feeling so well but was beaten when…

"We're ready." Sempai said as she stood looking completely recovered. It was almost like she had not been crying for the past half hour at all. "Lets go." She held my hand and we lightly raced to Kohaku-san's side.

Later I learned that Kohaku-san and Hisui-san had already packed our belongings for us and loaded them in the car. That meant that we're headed back to Astraea Hill instead of her beach house. It would take nearly a quarter of a day's drive to get there even if Kohaku-san stepped on the gas. She told us that we'd be there by 5 am and that we should sleep as much as we can because it would be a school day when we wake up.

I thought of talking to sempai, but couldn't really find anything to say or ask… But then the car ran onto a big bump and I felt something fall on my lap.

'_Sempai?...'_ I thought as I looked at her, she was sleeping using my lap as a pillow… for the second time. I felt my cheeks warm up and my chest felt incredibly fluffy. I watched her sleep until my eyes closed and I fell asleep myself.

**To be continued…**

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Author's Notes:** Omg! No new guest cameos this chapter?! XD Haha I wanted to bring in some of the girls from Hanaukyo Maid Team… but changed my mind.

Anyway I hope you all enjoyed that. It's sad that I never did get to do the other fics I wanted to get to… but oh well… I'll do it when it comes. I have also started reading Maria Mite. "STARTED…" like read one chapter… so don't hope for fics yet. XD


	16. Chapter XI: Hikari

Disclamier: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. TT;; (poor me… lol)

**Author's Notes: **Umm… Yeah… Delayed… Sorry about that. I was a little disappointed that the last chapter barely got any reviews… especially since I figured a Yaya x Tsubomi chapter would be greatly appreciated by it's fans… but oh well XD

I had originally planned to write using Amane or Yaya for this chapter, but that changed because using Yaya would too much Yaya POVs and using Amane so soon would probably turn off some of my readers XD so Here's Hikari!

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 11: Hikari: Where's My Yaya?**

My eyes opened only to be greeted by the rare dim sight of our barely lit room. It was rare that I woke up this early, usually I would wake up to a brightly lit room full of the morning sunlight. I thought about going back to sleep, but I felt oddly refreshed this morning. This made me decide to just sit up and check if Yaya-chan had arrived sometime last night or the morning.

I felt disappointed that she wasn't back yet… and a little worried too. I know I don't need to worry about Yaya-chan, if I know anyone who I'm absolutely sure she can take care of herself… it's her. But still... looking at the fake lump that I made under her blanket, the same one that was made to make the Sisters think Yaya-chan was home, makes me just wish she was back.

Then all of a sudden I noticed a few soft footsteps from outside the door… it stopped, then came a soft and slow turning of a key and lock. "Click!" our old creaking rusty lock made a very audible sound, but one can only hear it when it's really quiet. I heard some random barely whispered curses being thrown at the lock for being noisy. But wait a minute… I suddenly realized that the voice sounded very familiar.

The door knob twisted and the door slowly swung open, and revealed someone wearing a black tuxedo… It took me a second to realize that it was… "Yaya-chan?" I found myself mumbling out to no one. She was wearing an almost completely black attire usually worn by men, her hair tied behind her back which hanged on her right shoulder and a wilting white rose on her chest pocket.

She took a step inside making sure she was very quiet about her entry until… "Welcome Back, Yaya-chan." I greeted her.

"Eeek!" she gasped out loud that she had to silence herself with her own hand. She took a few seconds to calm herself before saying; "…Hikari! You surprised me…" I can understand why she was surprised, I wasn't usually up this early… she was probably expecting me to still be asleep. 'Wait a minute…' I told myself… I felt that something wrong with this picture.

She closed the door after dragging all her bags inside. "Is something wrong Hikari? You're not usually awake this early. Did you have a nightmare or were you having trouble sleeping?"

It felt weird to hear those words now. It feels like I'm not hearing them as her best friend anymore. Her inquiry was no longer an innocent question of my well being or at least I didn't look at it that way anymore.

"I'm fine." I smiled and told her; "I had a very good sleep actually."

"I see. That's good then." She nodded and smiled the likes I haven't seen her smile for quite a while now. She looked cheerful and back to her normal self. "How was your weekend, Hikari?" she asked me while she unpacked her clothes.

"It was fine… I suppose. I felt weeee…e." The sudden realization of what was wrong finally hit me…

"weeee?..." She looked at me with a light mixture of curiosity and concern.

"YAYA!" I almost shouted.

"Yes? Hikari." she responded very calmly.

"Say that again!" I demanded.

" 'That again?' Or 'Yes? Hikari.'?" She said in a calm yet teasing tone.

"Your voice is back?!" It was stating the obvious but I guess I was a little too surprised to care.

She nodded and smiled at me before giving me a soft; "Yeah."

"Since when?" I asked rather excitedly.

She looked a way for a moment as if to think before answering. "Uh… Saturday Night, I believe."

"I see… That's great then." I don't know why… but I didn't mean those words completely when I had said them. I suppose when I decided that I was going to see if Yaya-chan did mean more to me than just my best friend… I had planned doing it while she didn't have her voice.

"Yeah." She nodded with a faint smile.

The conversation died there and I just watched her unpack her bags. Aside from her small luggage there were a few bags which probably contained souvenirs. There were an awful lot of them judging by the size of the bags and I would have been surprised had this not happened at least once before.

After a few minutes of watching it occurred to me that she was wearing a tuxedo, something that I had forgotten to ask about earlier because of the excitement about her voice. "Yaya-chan? Why are you wearing a tuxedo?"

She made a funny and weird surprised sound after she looked down at herself. Then she laughed nervously… "Oh this… I was in a formal dinner last night."

"Then… aren't you supposed to wear a night gown?"

"ahaha… yeah I suppose…" she paused and thought for a few seconds. "But I wanted to wear something that would grab attention. So I decided to wear this instead."

"I see…" I decided to end the inquiry. My honest thoughts at the time were that she was hiding something… what exactly would probably be hard to figure out. She resumed unpacking before starting to undress herself. I don't know why but when I noticed that she was starting to I felt odd and had to look away from her. She didn't seem to mind or notice that I did. I heard her closet open, then the rattling of the hangers and the rustling of clothes inside.

I gave her a few moments before looking back at her only to find myself looking away again when I realized that she was butt naked, with her tanned and bikini marked skin, with her towel and spare clothes hanging off her shoulder.

"Oh yeah! Hikari, I brought you something."

I then heard the sound of her bags, plastic and boxes rustling together. Curious I turned my head slightly and looked at her from the corner of my eye before suddenly gulping down a mouthful of air that would have been a loud gasp when I saw her bare flesh again. My eyes traced what I guess would have been the only parts a short top and tight shorts would have covered.

My face felt warm… and it was more than enough to make me think 'Oh my… she's beautiful… and naked.' which coincidentally made me think that I might just have feelings for Yaya-chan.

"Hikari?!" she called me sternly enough to knock me out of my thoughts.

"Ye-Ye-YES?!" I stuttered out as I had to suddenly realize that her face was just a few feet from mine.

"Are you ok?" she said as she raised her had and placed it on my forehead. I couldn't help but look down at her… dare I say it?... and just blushed even more.

"You're a little warm Hikari… not enough for a fever but how are you feeling?"

"Umm… Yeah, I'll be fine." I answered, but she decided to make one more check. She brushed away my hair, closed her eyes as out foreheads touched.

"Hmmm…"

At that moment… I began to wonder if Yaya-chan really had feelings for me. After Tamao-san had told me about it, the thought of Yaya-chan's feelings didn't seem so farfetched. But now that she's doing that… it made me wonder. I mean shouldn't she be to shy to do something like that? Or maybe it was just me? Maybe she was just teasing me like she usually does.

She then said; "Well you don't seem to have a fever. But you're a little warm." in a kind calm voice. It was funny that I had been expecting her to tease me about it… but it never came. Instead she placed a small box on my lap wrapped up in a shiny paper and ribbon.

"What's this?" I asked and looked at the box. Not daring to look at her still very naked figure.

"A souvenir." She said in a happy tone. "Well I'm going to take a shower. Get a little more, rest just in case. Ok?"

"Okay…" I said with a wondering tone, still not daring to look up from the box until I heard the bathroom door close. I then proceeded to open the box she handed to me. I was delighted to see a glass figurine of a prince riding on a horse.

I felt sad for some reason. Seeing the gift should have been flattering, that Yaya-chan was being supportive of my love for Amane-sempai should have made me feel appreciative and happy… But I didn't.

_'Was I too late?'_ I asked myself. If Tamao-san was right… then Yaya-chan might be over me. Should I still bother to see if I might have feelings for her? It sounded like a love story gone wrong… What was I to do?

Yaya-chan came out of the shower moments later. She was wrapped in her towel with satisfied and refreshed smile on her face. "Your turn Hikari. I started filling up the bathtub for you." She told me with an oddly bright smile.

"Ah! Thank you." I stood and placed her gift on my table before taking out a towel and a fresh set of clothes ready for when I get out. Before entering the bathroom I found myself taking one last look at her. She was had her back turned away from me and was proceeding to put on her clothes… and I couldn't help but feel a blush on my face.

I entered the bathroom soon after that. I didn't want her to grow any suspicious of what I've been thinking… after all, I'm not even sure what I was thinking. I turned off the water, got in the tub and just tried not to think about it the too much. But to be very honest… I couldn't. Something about Yaya-chan now didn't feel the same… she hasn't teased me yet or I have yet to catch a sign that she might have feelings for me.

How do I know that there might be signs? Well after that talk with Tamao-san and a few hours alone thinking about Yaya-chan in our room… I guess I thought I saw some signs of her affections. But I supposed that I would have an opportunity to catch her show some.

I thought of something silly then… Yaya-chan always takes a shower. She rarely takes a dip in the bathtub. I found myself asking; _'Why was that?'_

Then my answer came.

"Hikari! If you stay there any longer we're going to be late for breakfast." Yaya-chan said from the other side of the door.

"Okay!" I answered back.

It became clear to me then. She always woke up earlier than me to take a shower long but quick enough to warm or cool herself in the morning so that I'd have enough time to soak in the tub. I never really thought about it… but I knew that she loves water, she loved swimming and nothing seemed to calm her more than a long soak… and she gave that up for me. I felt so touched… and guilty.

I soon got out of the tub, drained it and dried myself up before heading out of the bath. When I re-entered our room I noticed that Yaya-chan was packing some things aside from our school books.

"Yaya-chan? What are you doing?" I asked innocently as I began changing into my uniform.

"Oh? This…" She said as she looked up to me a second before returning her gaze to her items. "Some stuff I bought to share with everyone. I'm sure they missed the stuff from outside. It's been a while since my last outside trip after all."

"I see…" It puzzled me… the things that Yaya-chan buys are usually the expensive treats. Was she rich? Or did she have friends or family that owned the places that sold those things? I had a lot of questions… things that I should know as her best friend… At that moment I realized that she was my best friend, while I was barely her friend. I was close to her yet I knew so little about her where as she might just know all that one ever needs to know about someone… and I could only blame myself for that.

"All set!" She stood and looked at her packages before turning her head towards me and asks; "How about you?"

"I'm ready…" I said plainly.

She quirked her brow curiously at me which immediately made me regrets the way I said what I said. "Are you feeling alright, Hikari?" she asked with a hint of worry in her voice. It felt almost nostalgic… I pictured that she was just going to hug me and try to tease me into saying…

"I'm fine Yaya-chan." I somehow ended up saying.

She smiled at me a little worriedly, at least that's how I saw it, before nodded and told me; "If you start feeling otherwise I should just tell me. Okay?" with a bright smile that had this touch of mischief that I always seem to ignore until now.

I nodded and thanked her for her concern as she opened the door and lead the way out of our room.

We headed down to the dinning hall for breakfast. Yaya-chan immediately looked for classmates and friends to give her gifts too, all of which were more than happy to get them and promised not to tell anyone that she sneaked out of the weekend. Breakfast ended pretty much without any big incident, and I'm not counting the hundred or so trays that fell when everyone heard her voice. Although… I did notice that Tsubomi-chan had been a little more quiet than usual which I probably wouldn't have found noteworthy had she not looked quite happy.

We headed to class and I couldn't help but notice that Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan seemed to get a long. That told me something was wrong… Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan always argued about something, may it be about something relevant like the saintly chorus or about nothing important like who was walking straight. I watched them two or three paces behind them as they laughed about ice cream and cake… like they had some private jokes that only the two of them would ever understand.

I honestly felt left out… and I never thought I'd miss Yaya-chan's attention so much.

We arrived in class and already news of Yaya's voice coming back had spread faster than wild fire. Almost everyone from the saintly chorus was outside our classroom waiting, just to confirm it… which Yaya-chan did by greeting everyone in the hall very loudly which brought on the next important topic.

"So Nanto-san, I bet you're looking forward to getting back into the Saintly Chorus." Our choir leader asked. But Yaya-chan was quiet… and everyone found themselves looking at her.

"Yaya-chan?" I called to her a little worried.

"I'm sorry but… I'm not coming back." She said rather sadly.

But those words came as a shock to a lot of the members and friends. There was a big loud and almost simultaneous gasp in the hall when her words sunk in which was followed by a lot of girls gossiping.

"Now! Now! Everyone, let Nanto-san speak." said our leader hoping to calm everyone down.

"I just don't feel like singing in the choir anymore." Yaya-chan explained that she had time to think about other things she liked to do other than singing and thought about pursuing it. That she wanted to explore her other talents and maybe even learn new things. It made sense… and I'm sure that if she didn't spill any of her paints she'll be set for quite a while. I'm not saying that she was going to pursue painting though… she had not mentioned it at all.

"Those are valid reasons Nanto-san. And it's not like anyone is being held in the Saintly Chorus against their wills." Our leader said with a smile, that though disappointed with Yaya-chan's choice wasn't about to hold anyone in the chorus against their will. She then turned around and told everyone to get back to their classrooms as classes would soon start.

As I was watching the crowds disperse, I felt a sad gaze fall on my back. Maybe it was me I felt sad that Yaya-chan wasn't going to be with me in practice anymore… and she was the one that got me there in the first place.

Our class soon entered our room too since our teacher arrived to show us inside. She made it known that she knew that Yaya-chan had sneaked out of the dormitory for the weekend and promised to tell the school board unless she got her share of the treats Yaya-chan had brought back.

Classes resumed as usual, one would be surprised on how quickly the rave about Yaya-chan's voice returning died. But Yaya-chan didn't seem to mind. In fact she looked relieved when only a few people approached her to check for themselves.

We had just finished eating our meal and thank goodness! I was a little worried that Yaya-chan still wasn't eating enough. But that was remedied when I saw her gorge up more than her usual helping of soup, salad and sandwiches. I couldn't help but watch at how lady like she ate her meal… I never noticed that before. It was an enlightening time for me. Just watching and listening to Yaya-chan told me so much about her. I clearly recall asking myself; _'Why am I doing this just now?'_

Unfortunately… news of her wanting to join and pursue something else called another kind of crowd which paid a visit by lunch time. I'm just glad they came after the meal… not before or during it like last time…

Quite a few famous faces came forward… most of which were leaders, captains or managers of their respective clubs and they all came to ask one thing…

"Nanto-san! How would you like to join our club?"

It was a big surprise! A lot of the sports clubs had come to invite her; Tennis, Softball, Basketball, Volleyball, Swimming… even the kung fu club! I wonder why all these people are asking her? But when I gave it some thought… Yaya-chan is kind of good at all of these in P.E. classes… which I realize now is a surprising talent.

"I'm sorry." Her words snapped me out of my thoughts. I turned and looked at Yaya-chan who was bowing to them regretfully. "But I'll have to think about it." she added still bowing. They disappointedly dispersed and left us alone.

I found myself watching her; returning to her seat, pick up her tea, drink and wipe off anything that was still on her lips… all done in a sophisticated manner that boggled my mind. _'Has she always been doing that? She looked so elegant and lady like… It was so refined…'_ were the thoughts that passed my mind… in fact I was so focused watching her I almost didn't hear her question.

"Is there something on my face Hikari?"

"Eh?" my mind went black for a moment and I felt quite flustered. But somehow I was able to put myself together and answer her properly. "Ah… no there's nothing."

"…ok." she ended the inquiry. But something told me that she wanted to tease me about looking at her… I know that I saw that glow of mischief she that always has in her eyes when she teases me.

"What's wrong Yaya-chan? You've barely teased me all day." I somehow mindlessly blurted out.

"Eh?!" and a silly surprised look on her face was all I got as a response from it though.

I swore that I felt very warm that I had to look away from her. I still could not believe that I had said that. It almost sounded like I wanted her to tease me. And you know what?...

She suddenly hugged me from behind, in a warm, soft and gentle embrace that surprised me enough that I squeaked rather involuntarily.

"So you… missed me teasing you, Hikari?" she said in a very seductive tone.

I felt my heart racing; it was almost too hard to think. It was a really odd experience. Usually when Yaya-chan teased me I felt nothing, just embarrassed that she might be heard by someone. But those thoughts were the last thing on my mind… Instead I just didn't want her to tease me here and now… so I said; "I… I didn't mean... it that way Yaya-chan."

She laughed very softly and let go. "Of course you didn't, I'm sorry Hikari. I know you're just being concerned. Thank you." She told me in a tone that felt almost unreal. Like it wasn't 'my Yaya' that had said it. And believed me… I did think of her, for a moment as… 'My Yaya.'

I nodded to her sadly acknowledging her words. It was a lie, I was lying to her. I wasn't concerned… I wanted her to tease me… It was then that I realized that I had to talk to Tamao-san. I need to discuss that with her. But sadly the bell rang signaling that classes would now continue.

I felt Yaya-chan playfully place her arm around mine and hugged it, much to my surprise the excitement and that odd fluffy feeling I get around Amane-sempai was there too. We returned to our class, Yaya-chan insisted on walking me all the way there holding my arm like that. But honestly… I wished I was the one holding her arm like that.

When classes ended Yaya-chan said that she would be checking around the clubs to see what she could join. I asked her if she would reconsider joining the saintly chorus again but she declined, which made me feel disappointed. Not only because she declined me, but because I think that I do have feelings for her.

She then headed off to look around. I decided to skip practice today… I had someone that I had to talk too immediately.

I quickly headed for the Miator campus, where I hoped to meet Tamao-san somewhere along the way. Luckily we did, I found her alone on her way to the Strawberry Dorm.

"Tamao-san." I called her softly with a smile.

"Hikari-chan!" She greeted me with a soft smile of her own. "How are you?" she asked probably because she has heard of Yaya-chan coming back.

"That's part of why I came to you…" I answered and thought it was the best time to ask her about Nagisa-chan. "Where's Nagisa-chan?"

I noticed that frown that she quickly hid with a forced smile before she said; "She's helping Etoile-sama with her Garden today." rather roughly like she was forcing herself to be polite and nice.

"I see…" I decided to drop that subject… I suppose she would be touchy when it's about Nagisa-chan.

"Shall we head to our room?" she asked referring to her and Nagisa-chan's room. I nodded feeling the need for privacy. We talked about other things while we were still on our way. Things about Yaya-chan that I could tell in public, that event where a lot of the clubs came to invite her and that Yaya-chan had save a few packs of the treats she brought back for one of our midnight tea parties. I then learned that Tamao-san was about to go outside for an appointment with a doctor and we would have to keep our talk a little short, which might not be a big problem.

We reached her room and she immediately told me to spill all I needed to say while she got changed. I told her all about this morning, this afternoon, and just before I found her. The nakedness, the forehead to forehead, the mind boggling hugs, her plain sighted will not to tease me and I almost forgot… the prince on a horse figurine gift that she gave me. And that… "I think I love Yaya-chan."

"Hikari-chan…" she called me in a calm voice before she ushered me to sit on her bed. "I know it seems the signs are all there… but isn't a little to soon to draw a conclusion? I mean she had just gotten back… with her voice no less. Maybe you're confusing your feelings for something else? Or maybe you're thinking that you love her because the moment she came back you were no longer looking at her as your best friend but as a possible special person…"

"Oh…"

"I'm sorry Hikari. It would be easy to say you that you're in love with her. But are you absolutely sure?" she asked as she gently rubbed my back.

"…" I felt a little ashamed. I felt like a little girl caught with her hand between a cookie jar and a cake box.

"Give it time, Hikari… Who know's maybe… You and Yaya aren't actually in love with each other yet and might just begin to later." She said in a cheerful and teasing tone.

I found myself giggling at her words and said; "That sounds a little farfetched Tamao-san."

"So was Yaya-san being in love with you, remember?" she replied with a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

I blushed deeply at that but nodded.

"Well I got to get going. If all goes well I'll be back before curfew." She said as she walked us towards the door.

I bade her "a safe trip" and saw her off at the dorm's entrance. Just then Yaya-chan arrived and greeted Tamao-san as she walked towards the school's gates. They shared a minute, which I believe would have been enough for Yaya-chan to tell Tamao-san about the treats, before the parted.

Yaya-chan then walked towards me and asked where Tamao-chan was going all dressed up. I decided to just tell her, I don't think it was a secret at least to my knowledge.

I looked at Yaya-chan then, she smiled and said; "You have something on your hair…" then ran a hand through my hair. The touch felt very odd… but good. "There you go…" she said as she showed a piece of string before dropping it on the ground.

"Would you do that again?" I asked her.

She looked at me in the eye, but I found my self looking away from her… and blushing quite obviously.

"… um… sure…" She said with a smile as she nodded softly and curiously before running a hand through my hair again.

I closed my eyes… and felt my heart beat faster, my lungs felt warm and my stomach felt fuzzy.

I uttered to myself… _'My… Yaya…'_

**To be continued…**

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Author's Notes:** I think Hikari felt a little mature here when I wrote this. Like the pass few days gave her a lot of time to think. I have to admit that the very last parts (mostly Hikari's interaction with Tamao) was a little hurried.

Next time! One of these Chapters Oo;; I'm not sure which yet! XD

A: _**"Filler chapter 4" or "Chapter 11.5" Chikaru: Won't you Join me!?**_

B: _**"Chapter 12" Amane: So how are you?**_

C: _**"Chapter 12" Yaya: I'm smiling.**_


	17. Chapter XI 5: Chikaru

Disclamier: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. TT;; (poor me… lol)

**Author's Notes: **Haha! no one voted for Amane. Oh btw… I wasn't asking for anyone to vote! XD hahaha… but your ideas and comments were appreciated. Anyway a small title change for this one (if you're going to be critical about it.). I changed it because it sounded a little wrong when it's not in my head. (Probably something grammatical…)

Now this chapter isn't a filler… technically… but I didn't feel like labeling it as a chapter either. So I settled for using a ".5" If something deepens between her and Yaya… maybe I won't be so confused anymore. XD

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 11.5: Chikaru: Would you join me?**

It had been over nearly a week… and I had no luck of finding Nanto-san. I've heard about the rumor of her loosing her voice. But I guess I'm just being optimistic and hoping that she's well… including her voice. Why was I so concerned? Well you see… the schools festival was coming soon and I was hoping that I could entice her to join my band. And when I say my band… it's another club I've formed with Kizuna-chan and Remon-chan. We haven't thought of a name for it yet, but we figured we'll worry about it when we get her to join us.

Kizuna-chan had been try to convince me to just ask someone in within our school… but as we all know, Nanto-san has the best voice in all of Spica and probably even in all of Astraea hill. Her voice is so perfect you can tell which one is hers even when she sings with the choir. That is the one reason why I'm being so stubborn about having her join our band as the lead singer.

It was the end of classes and I was about to head off to Spica to begin my search for the day, when I saw the familiar white uniform of a Spica student. And I was pleasantly surprised to see the one person I set out to look for… Nanto Yaya. She was looking around the campus, seemingly letting her eyes wander here and there. I decided to take some time to observe her. I followed her watch and look around our school's various clubs. She even took the time to read the billboards and notices. The curiosity overwhelmed me and I decided to confront her, with some luck I might get to agree joining us.

"Good day! Nanto-san!" I greeted her from behind.

She lets out a surprised gasp and turns around. "Ah! Minamoto-sama, Good day…" she hesitantly greeted me back. I guess she wasn't used to using or receiving that greeting. I was also happy that she had her voice back, if it was really gone.

"You can call me Chikaru." I told her with a bright smile on my face.

She gave me an odd look of curiosity before giving me a hesitant; "ok…"

"May I call you Yaya?" I asked her with a teasing curiosity.

She blinked a few times and nodded saying; "I don't mind."

"That's great then." I found myself happily smiling. It was rare for me to interact with Spica Students. It's usually just their student council that I find myself talking to… and you wouldn't believe how stressful just being in the same room with them can be.

"So what are you doing in Lulim, Yaya-san?" I asked her just to start a good conversation with her. This was because I didn't want to sound desperate or too strong.

She looked up to the sky for a moment, as if to gather her thoughts, before answering; "I'm looking for a club."

Those words interested me and I just had to follow this topic. "Oh?! Which one?"

"Actually I'm just browsing, in a manner of speaking, hoping something would interest me."

"Why not a club in Spica?" I asked without thinking something I immediately regretted.

"…" she was quiet and looked down for a moment. And I was pretty sure that I saw her eyes dull out in sadness.

"Yaya-san?" I called to her, a bit worriedly.

"…" she sighed before looking back at me. "I'm sorry, Chikaru-san, that's kind of… personal." she said softly and sadly.

"That's quite ok. I understand." I told her with a warm smile, that she returned softly to me moments later.

We talked about Lulim's clubs some more. I learned that it was Nagisa-chan that had told her that Lulim allows clubs to invite and accept members from Miator or Spica. I had a blast when I told her that Nagisa-chan learned that from me, it seems that she was surprised by the coincidence of knowing the same person. I just told her that I was just lucky when it comes to meeting interesting people.

We had walked around the school and I took the time to show her around the different clubs of Lulim. I had pretty much decided then to bring her to our clubroom. Introduce her to the idea then invite her.

We went to our new clubroom; it was in the music wing of the school, after passing by our school's drama club and cheerleading club. I opened the door and let her inside.

"Welcome to our band room." I told her brightly.

"Band room?" she unconsciously repeated.

"Yes. Remon-chan, Kizuna-chan and I are forming a band." I told her and slowly filled her in with a few other details.

"You mean a rock band?" she asked.

"Yes." I happily replied and walked over to something or should I say some things that were still covered with sheets of long white cloths. I removed the sheet which revealed two huge speakers, a drum set, a keyboard and a pair of electric guitars.

"Wow…" she said sounding quite surprised.

I watched as she walked over to the instruments and inspected them a little. I liked how she looked at the instruments with pleased curiosity. I decided to walk over to one of the wall sockets and plugged in the speakers and keyboard. I then turned to her and told her; "Feel free to play anything you like."

She gave me a look of soft surprise before smiling and nodding to me. She walks to one of the electric guitars, the black one. She picks it up, places the strap on her shoulder and poses to play. I can see that she has never held a guitar before… she looked very uncomfortable not to mention she was holding it the wrong way.

"Hehe…" I let a soft giggle escape my lips as I walked towards her. I picked up the other guitar, held it properly and showed it to her. "Hold it like this, Yaya-san."

She looked and corrected herself several times before getting it right. She then proceeded to play a few testing notes on the instrument. In the next ten to thirty minutes I watched as she played the instrument; from random notes and noises to simple melodies and songs.

"Wow… Yaya-san that's quite a talent you have. It's like you learned how to play in minutes." I said quite surprised… maybe even a little envious.

She scratched her head and blushed lightly. "I had browsed books about guitars before and I know how to play the violin so I guess that sort helped." she reasoned, but something told me that it was only partially true… she was just really good at these things. That was something that only impressed me more… I had never thought that she was humble about her talent, maybe even shy and guilty about having it. I made a note to myself to try and never to bring that up with her ever again as much as possible.

I then decided that it was probably the best time to ask her; "Yaya-san, you're good at singing right?"

"I've been told that I am." She said humorously with a light smile.

I found myself laughing softly at the remark and yet again noting that despite how good she is she never seems to say that she is. "How would you like to join our band? We could really use someone like you as our lead singer." I finally managed to ask.

"…" she was silent for a moment. I had expected that, I gave her sometime to think of her reply… if she declined I'd lightly try to persuade her, but not too much. I wouldn't want her to feel forced to join… that's just not something one needs to feel when in a band after all. Everyone must be there playing and singing because they want to be.

Since she was not saying anything I decided to give her time to think about it. "I should give you time to think." I told her. I replaced the guitar back where it was and walked over to a desk. "I have copies of the music, why don't you…"

I was suddenly cut off when I heard her say; "Sure. I'll join."

"Eh?" I found myself asking and looking a bit dumbfounded for a moment. It took at least a quarter of a minute for me to fully realize her reply. I could feel myself just shining with glee. "You will?!" I asked her just to confirm she wasn't kidding or I wasn't hearing things.

"Yeah!" She quickly replied and this time with a bright smile.

"Yatta!!" I hugged her very ecstatically to the point I was almost jumping up and down. "I can't wait to tell Remon-chan and Kizuna-chan. I'm sure they'll be as surprised and happy as I am." I told her my voice just brimming with glee.

She smiled and giggled lightly.

"Oh yes!" I let go of her and return to the desk. I opened drawer and searched for the item I wanted to lend her. It took a few moments till I found it. I took it out and hand it to her.

She looked at the portable mp3 player and earphone set I handed to her. "I've copied some songs in it. All of which used the instruments we have here. Why don't you chose your favorites and we'll practice it with everyone."

"Sure!" she smiled and nodded before replacing the guitar back onto its stand.

"Oh! I should get back to the council. They usually have something to tell me on Mondays." I told her as I proceeded to cover the instruments with the white cloth again. "Are you free after school tomorrow? It would be nice if we can begin practicing soon."

"I believe I'm free. But is there any particular reason for the hurry?" she asked me, her head slightly tilted curiously.

I can immediately tell that no loophole or white lie can get me out this one so I decided to just tell her that; "I was hoping that we could play in the school festival."

"Oh…" She looked a little stunned. "And that is when exactly?" she asked rather worriedly.

I decided to just answer it bluntly, with a happy tone. "About 3 weeks from now."

"Oh…" she uttered rather blandly… though I can see a hint of surprise in her eyes.

"We only have to learn few songs. I'd even lend you my own guitar so that you can practice in your room."

"Um ok… wait… you have your own electric guitar? Aside from these?" she asked pointing one of the two guitars in the room.

"I sure do!" I told her with a smile.

She looked at me in disbelief, but I understand that I didn't look like the type who'd have such an instrument. She smiled a little quirkily at me then said "You're probably the epitome of Lulim's free spiritedness." trying to sound lightly sarcastic about it.

I giggled and told her; "Thank you. I'll take that as a complement."

"Don't worry… it was." She said in a faked emotionless tone. We looked at each other and laughed lightly at her joke.

"So… I'll see you tomorrow?" I asked her, hoping that she had not changed her mind one bit.

She nodded and said; "I'll be here. Just hope I don't get lost." in a light joking tone.

"I'm sure something can be arranged to avoid that." I replied playing along with her.

She then placed player into her bag before turning back to me again once again. "Well I suppose I'll see you later."

"I'll drop by your room to bring the guitar to you later." I told her as I began walking out of the room with her.

"You don't have to… besides I might disturb my roommate." she sounded very considerate to me and her roommate, who I believe was her best friend.

"Don't worry! These electric ones have headphones that enable you to play it with disturbing anyone else."

"Oh! I see…" I could tell that she was glad learning that fact. It seems to me that she really wanted to play the guitar now. "If it's not that much trouble then…" she added a little meekly.

I smiled and told her that it was no trouble at all. She smiled gratefully and thanked me before we headed out of the room. I accompanied her halfway out of the school. I had intended to walk with her the whole way but before I could some girls from the council had found me and not so literally dragged me back to work. I had asked one of them to accompany Yaya-san so that the girl wouldn't get lost and bid her goodbye. I returned to work and oversaw my student council duties.

After that I headed back with Remon-chan, Kizuna-chan and Kagome-chan to the dorms. I had told them all about my meeting with Yaya-san and how I got her to join our band… well more or less. As I thought they were quite thrilled that our club was now formed and will get its chance to shine.

When I arrived in my room the first thing I decided to do was pack the guitar up in it's case and bring it to Yaya-san. And I did… carrying the slightly heavy items I headed to her room. I then slowly realized that I had forgotten to ask her what was the number of her room. But I was sure that I can find someone to ask on the way.

A few minutes later, I found myself in the second floor of Spica's side of the dormitory. I was about to knock on a door at the end of the hall way when I heard; "Ah! Minamoto-sama." called out in a lightly surprised tone.

I turned and saw Toumori Shion, Spica's student council president. I smiled and greeted her with a soft and polite bow. "Good day! Toumori-sama."

"Good day!" She bowed back to me in response before saying; "It's a surprise to see you here."

I just smiled to let the greetings and formal exchange or random pleasantries die from the topic before asking; "Might I request some assistance Toumori-sama? I'm looking for Nanto Yaya-san's room."

"Nanto-san?..." I nodded. She paused for a moment to think before answering; "I believe it's that way, at room 212."

I thanked her and began continuing my way. But not until she told me about her wish that Etoile-sama and Ootori-san took the lead roles of the play the strawberry dorms is planning. I honestly have no qualms with the pairing… And I have no desire of taking a role for this year. I had different plans for the festival after all. But the way Toumori-sama was sharing her thoughts somehow made me shiver… in a bad way.

It took a while before she stopped talking about it… she almost didn't stop if some other Spica girls didn't pass by and reminded her of something she had to do. She bade me a short goodbye something I was thankful for. I headed to the room Toumori-sama had directed as Yaya-san's room.

I knocked and waited for someone to answer, which I didn't have to do for very long because I heard a soft voice call out; "Coming!" the door opened an revealed a smaller girl with blonde hair if I recalled correctly this girl was one of the choir members too. "Ah! Minamoto-sama! Can I help you?" she asked rather meekly.

"Yes, is this Nanto-san room?" I asked the girl, who I just recognized as Konohana Hikari… the girl rumored to have caught Ootori Amane's interest.

"Yes it is." She nods as she answered, she then turns to her side slightly allowing me to see further inside. "Yaya-chan, Minamoto-sama came to see you." she called the taller girl's attention but to no avail. And I think I know why… she was listening to the mp3 player I lent her, with her eyes closed as she sat on her chair and lightly tapped her feat on the floor with a familiar beat.

Konohana-san decided to take a more physical approach; she walked over to the girl's side and tapped her shoulder. Yaya-san eye's opened, looked at her roommate and immediately took off the headphones. "Yes Hikari?" she asked.

"Minamoto-sama is here to see you." Konohana-san informed her.

"Chikaru-san?" Yaya-san asked before turning her head towards me by the door.

I waved at her with a smile. "Hello again! Yaya-san."

"Chikaru-san! Hello!" She said brightly as she stood from her seat and placed the mp3 player down on her desk before walking towards me.

"I've brought the guitar like I said I would." I said as I present the case that held the guitar, the headset and small speaker.

"Thank you!" she said as she took the case from my hands. "To be honest… I was a little excited about it."

"I can tell!" I told her jokingly not expecting her to take me seriously. But she blushed, which told me that she did. I quickly decided to just change the subject and leave. "Anyway… I just wanted to drop it off early. I should get back to some work waiting for me in my room."

"Okay… Thanks again. I'll see you at practice tomorrow." I happily nodded as I felt that her words carried an almost child like excitement, anticipation and happiness.

As I was about to leave, I found my eyes focusing on Yaya-san's roommate for a few seconds. She looked quite… disturbed? I couldn't really tell… and my instincts told me that she didn't want me there. But I could be mistaken. I shrugged the thought away from my mind and returned to my room to get some work done before dinner.

Later that day, after dinner Rokujou-sama, Miator's Student council president, had an announcement. It was about the play that the Fourth, Fifth and Sixth year students who are occupying the strawberry dorms were going to do about the festival. Everyone seemed so excited to hear her say that the lead role, Carmen, would be played by;

"Lulim's Minamoto Chikaru-sama." she surprisingly informed. Gasps from almost everyone including myself filled the room, apparently very surprised by her decision.

But this was very unexpected for me and I had my plans for the festival as well… especially after they sort of concluded that Etoile-sama and Ootori-san were to play the lead roles. Although it made me a little happy and quite flattered. I stood and approached her, intent on getting myself out of this play. Else all the preparations we've made, and my invitation to Yaya-san would be wasted.

"Rokujou-sama… I feel honored… but I assumed days ago that the council had already decided on the actor's roles, and I have taken other obligations for the festival." I told her in a loud enough voice that everyone would be able to hear. I wasn't quite sure how most of them reacted, but I'm sure at least one person was happy that I did.

"I see." she uttered regretfully.

I bowed and politely said; "I'm sorry, but I must humbly decline the part."

She sadly looked at me and said; "Of course… It's a shame though." I bowed one more time and blurted out another apology.

She nodded to me and returned her attention to everyone. I returned to my seat much to my relief Remon-chan and Kizuna-chan weren't as disappointed as I thought they would be. In fact they were actually quite happy, which made me wonder how our band's special member was doing. I turned my head a little and searched among the heads around the Spica tables looking for her.

When I found her at the corner of the table, about four or five tables away from my own, I was surprised to see that she wasn't even listening to the announcements. Instead she was listening to the player again. Her eyes lightly closed and her head nodding softly to a beat. I couldn't help but smile seeing her lip sing the music she was hearing. Something told me I did something more than just give her something different and interesting to do.

My eyes somehow decided to look around on it's own. And I was surprised dreamy glances a smaller girl was giving her. No, it wasn't her roommate, it was a long pink haired girl. But speaking of her roommate, she looked quite troubled. And like myself, Yaya-san and that pink haired girl… she was probably not listening to the announcements anymore.

I later learned that Rokujou-sama had given most of the roles to Spica and Etoile-sama was Carmen. And somehow my mind just didn't want to think about the play too much that night. Instead my mind wondered;

'_what songs would Yaya-san chose?'_

'_how well can she play in a few weeks?'_

and _'would she look good in a costume?'_

**To be continued…**

_**Please Review!!!**_

_**Author's Notes:**_ I'd like to say that yes there are holes in the story, this sort of thing is true in real life too so give me time to get to the character that will fill the holes and make the story more or less "whole". I mean after all you can only tell a portion of someone else's life right? ;; (Ok maybe that wasn't clear… but I feel better now! XD)

And a little request to the anonymous reviewer that said they were OCC. Can you be more specific on what I made the character do that made you say so? So that I may learn from it and not commit the same OCC effect unless it's intentional. After all if I left everyone perfectly in character… I would just be writing the whole Strawberry Panic story over again. (I don't mean to be rude, but your review left a bad after taste. Because I didn't learn anything and it honestly felt like a flame from someone hiding in an Anonymous mask.)

I would like to thank my readers especially the ones that leave reviews. Thank you for your comments and your time.


	18. Chapter XII: Amane

Disclaimer: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much I want to. TT;; (poor me… lol)

**Author's Notes: **Sorry for the greatly long delay, and advance apologies for those that don't like Amane very much. And it also might be a bit responsible as to why it took so long for me to write. XD

_Italic – for thoughts._

_Italic and underline – for Yaya's written lines._

**Bold – for shouting.**

Underline – for Yaya's mouthed lines.

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 12: Amane: What am I doing?**

It's been three days since I've talked to Hikari… That was the hard painful fact that ran through my head over and over as I emptily gazed at my copy of the Script for the play we were going to perform. I sighed and closed it for the nth time today, I just couldn't feel like even trying to read the thing. I released a deep and empty sigh before easing my back on a tree's side and turning my gaze back into the sparkling sunlit lake.

After a few moments of just trying to relax, I suddenly noticed foot steps rustling the grass and rocks from behind me. I decided to ignore it, whoever or whatever it was… I just hoped that whoever or whatever would do the same for me.

"Ootori?..." I suddenly felt an odd tingle in my skin upon hearing that voice. I wasn't quite sure why until I turned my head to see who it was.

"Nanto-sama…" I said thoughtlessly.

"Sama?!" she exclaimed in a rather surprised and seemingly annoyed tone. "Not you too…"

I didn't really understand what she meant by that and instead I dealt with the issue that I found more important.

"You have your voice back?!" I almost yelled out.

"Isn't it obvious? And shouldn't the news have reached you already… yesterday at the very latest?" she said to me in an almost nonchalant manner.

I then quickly recalled that Natsuki and Shizuru talking about it, quite loudly, the day before. It was almost like they wanted me to hear about it, which felt relevant to me for about a few minutes and ended when the truth that there wasn't really anything between me and Nanto-san sunk in.

"Oh yeah… It did…" I fell silent after that, I wasn't quite sure what to talk to her about next.

She walks closer towards me and sits under the same tree, keeping a right angle's distance from me.

"Why are you here?" she suddenly asked.

"The school allotted time for everyone to make some preparations for the festival." I told her.

"That doesn't really answer my question does it?" she asked in an almost harsh voice that honestly scared me.

"No… I suppose it doesn't." I said nervously.

She gave me a soft hum as a reply.

"What are you doing here if I may ask?"

"Probably the same thing you are."

"And that would be?..." I leaned towards her just a little hoping that it would pressure her into answering me, but it doesn't work and instead she returns the gesture to me only more effectively.

"I don't know. What are you doing here?"

I let out a sigh of defeat and said; "Thinking I guess…" turning my head towards the glistening water again.

She then surprised me by saying; "Nope that's not what I'm doing…"

"Oh?" I turned my head towards her hoping that she'd tell me what it was she was doing here. But it didn't come and I had to ask her again… "so… what are you doing here?"

She looked up towards the tree's leaves and gave herself a moment before answering; "I guess I'm running away from someone…"

"Eh?"

"Surprised?" she turned her head towards me.

I couldn't help but nod.

"A friend of mine confessed to me."

I surprised myself when I found myself realizing that I had yelled out; **"EH?!?!"** and looking back that reaction probably wasn't myself being me… despite the small nagging fear that nudged me at the back of my mind.

"Hey! Don't shout! It's not like it was Hikari." she said with a pained and knowing smile. I was filled with a sense of bitter sweet relief… but maybe it was only matter of time that Hikari would. I wanted to tell her… but I couldn't. All I could do was nod.

"Anyway… long story short… I just wanted to be alone, so I thought of looking for some new place to hang around. This girl knows all of the places I like to slack off on."

"I see…" found myself nodding and looking away from her.

"You won't tell anyone I'm hiding around here would you?" she asked with warm and mischievous eyes that honestly took away any uneasiness I felt around her.

"I won't..." I told her happy that I knew were I could find her.

"And no more holding me down and kissing me against my will alright?" I knew she was teasing but it honestly affected me more that either of us might have expected.

"Can we drop that… as collected as I appeared back then, I'm very embarrassed about it now." I confessed and looked away from her trying to hide what I believe was a deep blush on my face.

"Really?... why?"

"Well… what I did back then didn't seem like my usual self…" I felt like digging a hole and burying myself in it just to hide from the embarrassment I felt just remembering what I had done that day.

To my surprise, she started laughing. It started with small barely audible giggles, but slowly got louder turning into one long deep laugh. She held her stomach, which I gather would be in some pain from the laughing fit. It took a while for her laugher to die down. "hahaha…No… haha… kidding…" she managed to say in between laughs.

I decided not to give any reply to that and just mentally dig my imaginary grave.

I then noticed that she was quiet. A little alarmed I decided to turn my head and check on her. She was curled up into a ball, her arms wrapped around her legs. She just stared blankly forward. I decided not to bother her… that if she wanted to talk, she'll talk.

Minutes passed and I heard her move, I decided to just quietly watch her from the corner of my eye… I heard the sound of paper and plastic which made me turn my head just a little to satisfy my curiosity. I was very surprised to see that she had taken off her jacket and was holding a vaguely familiar package… It took me a few seconds to realize that it was a pack of cigarettes.

"Aren't you a little too young to smoke?" I asked, in a concerned and wary tone.

"Aren't you a pervert for holding me down and kissing me when I was most vulnerable?" she said and eyed me accusingly with a hint of anger in her voice and eyes.

"Okay… I deserved that…" told her with guilt and embarrassment once again filled and weighed down my chest.

I then heard the not so common sound of a lighter's flint wheel then the very familiar sound of a girl coughing and choking. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah… I'm just new at this…" she admitted as she pounded on her chest.

"How long have you been smoking?" I quickly asked, while silently hoping she'll just put out the light and end her self induced suffering.

"This would be the first stick the second pack of cigarettes I have." She said before pursing her lips against the cigarette butt and breathing deeply through her mouth. She then exhales it all out, puffing out a long stream of smoke from her lips. I couldn't help but stare at them.

Without once turning to look towards my direction, she said to me; "They're dirty… but would you kiss them?" her question caught me of guard.

"eh?" was the only thing I could remember saying…

"It's just a question, I'm not asking you to nor do I want you to…" she said sadly. Thanks to her words my mind slowly cleared and I slowly felt relieved and drained what I believe could have been the start of an anxiety attack, but a little disappointed that she didn't mean it.

"I see…" I paused, I didn't really know what to say at the time so I decided to just ask her why; "Why do you ask?"

"I've taken the first kiss of three girls…"

"…"

"The first one hated it… because I stole it." She paused and looked at me. "Hikari has told you about our fight, I believe?"

I nodded to her question and waited for her to say something. But instead she gave me a very sad look and almost instantly I realized what she wanted to say. I knew it already… Hikari told me the day she made her decision. Wondered what to do and how to react…

I took me a while to snap out of that train of thought. I looked at her again and saw the saddest eyes… filled with pain, guilt and self hate… I knew that she didn't want to hear anything I would say about it. And what right did I have to say anything to her? All I could do was nod.

She smiled painfully and continued; "The second one… I hated it…" I had expected her to look at me badly when she said that, but I was surprised that her voice sounded very forgiving and it showed from her soft sad eyes. It relieved me that even a little she had forgiven me for what I did that day.

"The third one I did out of pity and gratitude… and though it felt good, I don't feel so happy that I did." She said before looking away, taking the cigarette to her lips again and taking another breath of smoke. She fell silent again, concentrating on smoking slowly. I watched her eyes as they sadly watching the clouds of smoke slowly disappear with the wind.

"Why not?" I asked, a little curious.

"Why…" she paused to huff another helping of the smoke. "probably… because it might be giving her false hope."

"False hope?" I repeated absently as I pondered on what she would mean.

She nodded and turned away to exhale the smoke. "Yeah… I don't want her to think that I might just fall for her eventually just because I kissed her…"

We fell silent again after that. We sat still and silent long enough for her to finish her cigarette and light another.

I couldn't think of anything to say and regrettably I blurted out; "Why do you like Hikari?"

But her question quickly killed that line of conversation. "Why do you have so many questions?" she asked in an almost violent tone.

"I'm sorry…" I quickly apologized. Once again I felt scared of this girl… it's hard to believe that I was actually able to get close enough to kiss her.

"Me too… I didn't mean it like that." She took deeper breath of smoke this time and exhaled it quickly and forcefully, paused then said; "I don't know anymore…"

"Eh?!"

"Or maybe I should say… I don't know… why I like her… I didn't really need a reason why… she was Hikari." She said dryly.

"That didn't sound as romantic as that thought could be."

She smiled brightly… I immediately knew that she was hiding her true feelings. "It doesn't have to… it's not like it'll matter anymore." Her words stung… I knew why she said that… but if she knew what I did and what Hikari is doing, she would probably act differently.

At that point… I really wanted to tell her that I had told Hikari what I've done to her… What Hikari planning… I wanted to tell her all of it. To maybe alleviate some of the guilt of forcing myself on her… or maybe a false sense of love told me that I'd feel better if Hikari choose me anyway even after telling her. But I couldn't, as selfish as it sounds… I couldn't. I had grown to like Hikari more and more... I didn't want to do anything that could result to me helping someone else take her from me.

I watched her finish the second stick of cigarette, putting out the small flame and tossing the cigarette butts on behind the bushes. I dared not comment about it.

She then pulled out a small package wrapped in a black bandana that I failed to notice earlier. I then noticed one more detail… her hands were full of band aids! She had about an average of two for each finger. I wondered what could have caused them. I continued to watch her as she unwrapped the package revealing a bento box. She opens it and reveals a hideously prepared assortment of sushi and rice rolls.

"You want some?" she said as she offered me a pair of chopsticks.

Before I knew I was doing, I had accepted the chopsticks and prepared to pick up something I would regret for the rest of the week… a sample of the really black Tamagoyaki. I picked it up and swiftly brought it into my mouth…

'_It's Awful!!!'_ I thought… I couldn't taste the egg at all, my tongue was tortured by the taste of the strong soy sauce, salt and what I'd guess was curry powder. I fought hard not to grimace at the flavor… But fortunately for me she seemed to be expecting it to be bad.

"That bad huh?" she asked with a disinterested voice. "I guess it's to be expected..."

I wondered what she meant by that and wanted to look at her to check what kind of face she had. Was she smiling sadistically at my tongue's expense or was she sad that it tasted bad? Unfortunately… I was trying swallow the thing all the while holding what could be what was left of breakfast somewhere still deep in my esophagus.

"You can just spit it out… there's no need to force yourself for me." she said with the same unconcerned voice.

And with her permission I decided to do just that. I picked up a big leaf that had fallen close by me and spitting the inedible piece of fried egg. I spat out some of my tainted saliva after that before discarding the leaf somewhere of our line of sight. When my attention returned to her I was surprised that she was eating her… not so carefully season food.

"How can you eat that?" I asked not holding any sign of my disgust.

But she just looked at me smiled, picked up another piece and said; "Like this." Before placing the food into her mouth, chewing for a few moments and swallowing. I felt like vomiting at the sight of her eating it and just the memory of the taste was enough to make me feel like throwing up. I really felt sick when she finished it all.

"Doesn't it taste bad?!"

"It was awful…" she said but she didn't look like she meant it.

"Why did you eat it then?!" I was somehow able to finish asking before cringing in disgust.

But she just shrugged and mumbled something that told me she didn't really care how it tasted. She then lit another cigarette and took one deep huff. And like with the first one she had she choked and coughed again. Was she punishing herself? Eating bad tasting food and smoking… what would she do next? Was there special meaning to this? Was she deeply wishing to punish me instead or herself? Or is she looking for pity?

"What's on your mind?" she asked me, shaking me out of my thoughts.

"Ah…" I thought about if I should tell her… It would be meddling, something I don't like doing. Sensing my hesitation she told me that I could be brutally honest with her, which didn't convince me to tell her that easily. It took a few moments but I did tell her. "I think you're being self destructive."

She surprised my by saying; "I think so too." I was shocked to be honest. I just ended up looking at her as she sadly gazed emptily into the bright blue sky. I wondered if I should tell her… I'm sure that she would cheer up if I did. But I don't want to loose Hikari.

I recalled the last time I spoke to Hikari… We were in the amusement park, where Shizuru had given me two tickets to. I had gathered the courage to walk up to Hikari's room, knock on her door and ask her out that day. It was to start getting even closer to Hikari and to fulfill my promise to Nanto-sama. I must admit I felt a little uneasy at first, I had expected that Nanto-sama would be there when I came over. But it was the way that Hikari looked a little unsure when I asked her that really made me worry. I never would have thought that it was a sign for me not to do something later.

We spent the better part of the day having fun where ever we could. Surprisingly we had almost ridden on all of the rides and saw all the attractions. She was smiling and laughing happily with me… It was honestly a great day!... at least until we were resting in a nice empty and quiet area.

I had wanted to come clean with her. So I told her… everything, but Nanto-sama's feelings. Hikari looked shocked when I told her, that I kissed her best friend… but unlike my fears she didn't seem angry as I was expected. Instead she looked at me with a troubled face and said; "I have something to tell you as well…" from there my anxiety grew to a whole new level.

She had told me where it began. A kiss, her reaction, the distance and avoiding each other, making up, and loosing something she realized meant more that she thought. She told me about her talk with her Miator friend and how she came about her decision. I wanted to be selfish and tell her not to… but just as I couldn't tell Nanto-sama of what Hikari is doing, I couldn't tell Hikari not to do what she wanted. I would be in the loosing end if I did either. All I could do now was to wait for her.

"Hmmm?" When I had stopped thinking about my conversation with Hikari, I was surprised to see Nanto-sama's eyes just a couple of feet from my own. "Are you ok? You look more troubled than I do." she asked, though I couldn't sense a hint of worry from her voice.

I just nodded and said that I would be alright. She gave me an analyzing look before looking away and seating again, this time a little closer to me. And once again we just sat in silence. It would be a while before the day would be over. We had quite a lot of time.

"Hey Nanto-sama?" I called her without turning to look at her. But when she didn't respond I turned and called her again. "Nanto-sama?"

I was greeted with the raven haired girl's sleeping face. She had rolled herself into a soft ball, her arms around her knees and her head rested lightly on them which covered half her face. But the sadness in her sleeping eyes didn't escape my eyes. I couldn't help but stare at her as she slept. It wasn't like there was anything more interesting than her around at the moment. And as misguided as my feelings were for her… they were still feelings.

But suddenly she seemed to slowly loose her balance and fell towards me. I wasn't quick enough to react her head softly landed on my shoulder before slowly sliding down on my lap. For a moment I thought she was teasing me or maybe testing me if I was going to do something again. To be honest those thoughts did come to me… but it was quickly wiped away when I noticed a feverish blush color her face. She looked pained and her breathing was irregular. I tried to wake her up, but it seems like she had not actually fallen asleep… she fainted.

Thinking quickly I decided to rush her to the infirmary. I picked her up like a princess and was about to rush of to our destination when I heard something fall down. It was her cigarettes…

'_It would be bad if someone found it… her vest is here too…'_ I didn't think my actions through and I decided to pick up the cigarettes instead of the jacket. Quickly pocketing the thing I rushed of with a sick girl in my arms. I was sure that a lot of people saw me carrying her, but I didn't care. At that moment… I was only concerned about her.

When we got to the infirmary all the nurse could do while Nanto-sama was unconscious was keep her fever down. The nurse then said that she would take care of her. And as much as I wanted to stay, I remembered that I'm not supposed to. I left the room and recalled that I had left my copy of the script and Nanto-sama's vest back by the lake side. I decided to retrieve it immediately.

Making sure I wasn't followed, I returned to the spot where we sat and talked. I was glad to find that the two items were there right where we had left them. After carefully picking both items up and dusting them I headed back to the infirmary.

When I retuned I was glad to see that the nurse was close by and watching over her. I hung Nanto-sama's vest on a hair before asking the nurse; "Has anyone come in since I left?"

She shook her head and told me no, before asking; "Should I be expecting someone to?"

"Not really." I smiled inwardly, glad that no one had come in just yet. I then decided to ask her if she could call me when Nanto-sama regains consciousness. "Might I ask a favor?"

"Sure, what would that be?" she asked smiling curiously.

I was about to tell her my request but I changed my mind at the last minute. I thought that it would probably be best if I didn't. People would get suspicious, Hikari might not like it… she might not like it.

And although I'll probably regret it, I told the nurse; "…never mind. Please take care of her."

**To be continued…**

_**Please Review!!!**_

_**Author's Notes:**_ To be honest another reason why it took so long was because I found myself too lazy to write a certain incident. Again… there seems to be a scene skip… sorry XD I'll do better in the non-narrative version.

Ok… on to some things that I'd like to address. First of all to those saying that Yaya seems perfect or Mary Sue-ish here, I have to admit that yes! I've written her to be extremely talented in some things here. But I just because most of what the random fans and other main characters see are her bright sides doesn't mean I didn't write about her short comings. For one, I had made Hikari mention that though Yaya doesn't get angry… when she does it can be quite scary and Amane had front row seats for that in one of her chapters. Like in the anime, she's has the tendency to be depressed and lazy. She runs away from her problems and tries to hide her feelings with a fake smile. To those that saw these… congratulations! To those that didn't… oh well.

Second I've notice that I've misspelled Senpaiupperclassman as Sempai (because honestly that's how I always seem to hear it). So at least for this version of Yaya's voice I've decided to keep this misspelling. Because I'm too lazy to copy paste and edit for it. XD

Up next will be Yaya's Chapter! (I promise! Really!) More about her short comings, her already messed up head and heart, her practices with Chikaru and more!

I would like to thank my faithful readers in advance. Thanks Everyone!

Oh yes… if anyone is interested, add my YMID (asakustseirran) and drop me a line. Encouragement is nice every now and then.


	19. Chapter XIII: Yaya

Disclamier: I do not own Strawberry Panic! No matter how much better its story would have flowed if it did. XD (poor me… lol)

**Author's notes: **Okay... this is a turning point. Before you read this... know that you will hate me soon, love me then hate me again. XD You've been warned!

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Strawberry Panic: Yaya's Voice**

**Chapter 13: Yaya: Taking a step forward? Or back?**

"Ow… ow… What kind of girl cuts herself seventeen times?!" I scolded myself for being so incredibly clumsy with a kitchen knife.

I looked at my right hand, as my left hand was busy carrying my lunch box, and there it was Eight of Seventeen cuts, Ten of Twenty Two pieces of bandages, the other five is from that episode I had last week when I went berserk in the art room, suffice to say that some of them weren't healing as fast. Not that it was anything new… mom always said that my wounds always took longer than most people to heal. But despite that, and the possibility of scaring my hands, I don't regret them… as painful as they are they felt like a small price to pay.

The ones I got from cooking, or at least trying to do so, I do very much regret. I openly admit that I cannot cook to save my life. Hell I probably can learn to cook if my relationship with Hikari depended on it, which until a few days ago weighed heavier than cooking for my life. But I supposed I should at least learn enough to live on for the future or so I said to myself when I took Tendo-san up on her offer to teach me how to cook.

Anyway… I found myself walking towards the lake. It was just about lunch time, or before lunch time… I'm not really sure because our teachers gave us a bunch of free periods to start some preparation for the upcoming school festival and I just decided to escape work while no one was looking.

Soon enough I found myself at the lake side. The trail was full of fallen leaves and the wild grass was quite full, it was autumn after all, which meant my steps were quite noticeable but since I didn't think anyone would be around to hide from at this time so I didn't really mind them. It was calming in a way.

It was then that I saw someone I never expected to see there. "Ootori?" I blurted out my words seconds before I thought of it.

She turned her head ever so slightly to look from the corner of her eye but suddenly turned her head to face me all the same saying; "Nanto-sama…"

"Sama?!" I exclaimed in surprise. "Not you too…" I'm sure my voice sounded a hint disgusted when I had said that, it was a bit of a shock for me but I got over it quickly after all… after the fans, Tsubomi-chan and Hikari… no wait scratch that… I was very shocked. Even Ootori was acting weird. And at that point maybe I began regretting a lot of things, probably including my decision to come here... and I'm not exactly sure if it's just my current local or the decision I made three years ago.

"You have your voice back!?" she almost yelled out. She looked very surprised. I wasn't myself… because the thought of picking on her, Ootori Amane-sama: Prince of Spica, sounded very interesting.

I looked at her with a poker face to hide the intent to mess with her head, though I'm not quite sure if I was able to completely hide the hint of annoyance in my eyes, before I said, "Isn't it obvious? And shouldn't the news have reached you already… yesterday at the very latest?" It's true anyway, news spreads faster in Spica than the other two schools or so I've heard anyway.

She thought about it for a moment before confirming my words with an "Oh yeah… It did…" which didn't sound very lively.

I then walked towards her and sat close enough to say I was beside her but far enough to make a point.

"Why are you here?" I bluntly asked. I have only heard Hikari mention her name just a handful of times in the past days since my return and I have to be honest that it was quite bitter sweet. It made me wonder if they're arguing… but only for a flicker of a moment that makes me wonder now why I bothered mentioning it at all.

She answered quickly saying; "The school allotted time for everyone to make some preparations for the festival."

And for a moment I lost my poker composure and harshly countered her words; "That doesn't really answer my question does it?"

"No… I suppose it doesn't…" she replied, obviously nervous.

"Hmmm…" I wasn't sure what to say… I'm good at teasing Hikari and Tsubomi, but this girl was never on my list.

After a short silence she said; "What are you doing here, if I may ask."

I wanted to say 'no you can't…' but seeing as she had already, I might as well say something. I quickly considered what would be a 'smart ass' response which was: "Probably the same thing as you are."

"And that would be?..." She leaned closer, why exactly was a mystery to me for only a moment… when I realized what she was doing I copied her and technically returned the question.

"I don't know. What are you doing here?"

I knew I won the moment she sighed. I watched her as she turned her head towards the lake and said: "Thinking. I guess…"

I continued to watch her as the light bounce with a soft gleam from her odd crimson eyes. I wondered why I noticed that. I felt angry about it for a moment but decided the less I pondered about things the better… especially if it had something to do with Hikari or Ootori. Yes… that would probably be best. Don't ponder about them to much.

Then it just slipped out. "Nope! That's not what I'm doing…" I planned on ending the conversation and just going somewhere else. But instead these words came out and got her attention.

"Oh?" she said as she turned her attention towards me again. And I knew from the look on her eyes she wanted me to tell her what I'm doing here without her asking. But of course I didn't and wouldn't… not even if she asked. "So… what are you doing here?"

I looked up to avoid her gaze. I hate her eyes… Those red eyes of this prince like girl… that made me want to answer her. And as I was looking up I wished that the tree's leaves would all just fall and bury me right then and there. But what are the chances of that happening…

"I guess I'm running away from someone…" I answered.

"Eh?" was all she let out as a response.

"Surprised?" I looked at her again and immediately regretted it… the look on her eyes screamed "Tell me about it!" only accented more by her face that had curiosity written all over it. She nodded… once, a simple run of a mill, dull and normal nod… but why did it feel like she was begging me to tell her all about it.

"A friend of mine confessed to me." I answered her unspoken plea.

Well it's technically the reason why… but not the whole truth. You see… After Tsubomi confessed her love and we got back from our weekend trip… she's been acting differently. I clearly recall telling her that I'm not ready. But what does she do? She clings to me any chance she gets. It was embarrassing. Just yesterday she coincidentally met me in the cafeteria restroom and she stuck to me like glue till lunch was over. This happened at dinner too and Hikari was giving us this weird look that I'm not sure how to translate.

It's not like I hate Tsubomi's attention, I just don't feel comfortable with Hikari being able to see her that close to me... not to mention everyone else seeing her close to me. I know I shouldn't care… but I do. It's just not normal! And I haven't told Hikari that she was with me when I went out last weekend… I don't think I can tell her either. I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Well I shouldn't worry about it too much, my business is my business… unless I make it her business which would mean opening up to her which I'm quite sure isn't happening anytime soon.

Anyway… Ootori seemed incredibly surprised and worried about it. She reacted out with a very loud: **"EH?!?!"**

"Hey! Don't shout! It's not like it was Hikari." I told her, which only painfully remained me of the awful truth… But for some reason she looked really worried. My mind wondered for a moment only for me to mentally kick myself and stopped the wondering process. Then I said: "Anyway… long story short… I just wanted to be alone, so I thought of looking for some new place to hang around. This girl knows all of the places I like to slack off on." Just to cover the short amount of time I held myself in thought.

"I see…" she nodded and looked away, seemingly worried or disappointed. Not that I should care.

"You won't tell anyone I'm hiding around here would you?" I asked her, teasingly putting a cute expression on my face or at least I think I did.

But I got the response I was hoping for anyway so it was good. And oddly I found myself teasing her again saying: "And no more holding me down and kissing me against my will alright?"

Her response was unexpected however. She turned a very deep shade of crimson and looked very flustered. "Can we drop that… as collected as I appeared back then, I'm very embarrassed about it now." She then looked away, her face glowing with guilt.

I almost felt sorry for her... err no, that would be completely false. I felt sorry for her. But I would not be stupid or brave enough to admit it to anyone other than myself. I hated her so much… I stopped considering her as a person. And I found myself thinking and asking, "Really?... Why?" with honest and pure curiosity that made me want to kick myself... hard.

She answered me guiltily, honestly and very repentant saying that what she did back then wasn't like her at all. And I had to agree… I'd like to think I at least knew her enough to not do something like that. And for some reason… I found it funny that she admitted to that, because I never thought she was the apologetic type. I burst into a very audible laughing fit. She made no attempt to redeem her pride even a little and she didn't even try to stop my laughter, which I'm sure I would have found a way to turn into another round of teasing.

"No… kidding…" I somehow managed to let out between laughs before slowly stopping. We both looked away from each other and remind silent. I took of my jacket because I was feeling a little warm from the walk and laughing I did. I then found myself curling up, wrapping my arms around my legs and letting my head rest on my knees. It wasn't the most comfortable of positions but I did it anyway and just watched the water for a long moment.

I spared a few seconds to take a short look at her. She looked… confused…

Not that I should care or at least that was what I told myself at the time. I then had this feeling to be bad, I remembered the pack of cigarettes I had kept in my pocket and took it out. While I was rummaging through my pocket for the lighter I noticed that Amane had turned her attention towards me and my devilishly forbidden item, well at least it is in schools.

"Aren't you a little too young to smoke?" Her words sounded worried and concerned… again not that I should care.

And without really thinking too hard about what I was about to say… I berated her for it in my own way, throwing in an angry voice and an almost menacing glare.

"Okay… I deserved that…" She cowered a little, her face full pained and guilty. And for a moment I thought that she would start crying… not that I should care.

I lit my cigarette and quickly took a huff only to immediately cough the smoke back out. I wasn't used to it after all… I thought after one pack it would become like drinking a strong carbonated soda.

"Are you ok?" She asked, sounding a little concerned.

"Yeah… I'm just new at this…" I said as I pounded my chest a little, which I soon learned doesn't really offer any sort of relief unless you're choking on liquid or food.

"How long have you been smoking?" she asked.

Oddly enough I answered her honestly. "This would be the first stick of the second pack of cigarettes I have." I said before taking another deep huff of smoke. I counted to three before blowing it out in a long stream of smoke. I noticed that she was staring at me… or more specifically, my lips. And of course I wouldn't pass the chance to make her squirm some more. "They're dirty… but would you kiss them?" I said to her adding a hint of seduction in my voice.

A simple and dumbfounded "Eh?" was her only response. But when her face turned as red as her eyes… I had to firmly hold my tongue between my teeth just to keep myself from laughing.

"It's just a question, I'm not asking you to nor do I want you to…" It was more or less the truth. I don't want her to kiss me… I was merely curious if she would even if my breath stank of nicotine laced smoke. But to be honest, I had not meant to ask the stupid question.

"I see…" I was a little relieved. She might just end the conversation… or at least that odd thread. But she just had to follow it with, "Why do you ask?"

'Why did I ask?' I asked myself. I just felt like it? It just came out that way? I had nothing else to say? I wanted to tease her for looking at my lips?... yeah that would probably be the best answer. Not exactly something you says to someone who isn't close to you nor does it sound nice and in the end I didn't say it. Instead this was the answer that passed my lips, "I've taken the first kiss of three girls."

I looked at her and she looked surprised but said nothing. She knew she gave me her first kiss… she probably didn't imagine I'd get three.

"The first one hated it… because I stole it." I paused again and looked at her. "Hikari has told you about our fight, I believe?"

I wasn't all that surprised when she nodded a second or two after I had said that. She most likely knew or had been told of it by Hikari, if not she should realize it now. I don't think I can discuss what exactly happened with Hikari… it's just… too painful. After all it had almost marked the end of our friendship. She looked unsure of what to say or do… she looked away. I don't blame her. If I were in her shoes I'd have difficulty looking at me too.

I tried to give her a smile but whether I succeeded or not, I'll probably never know. "The second one… I hated it…" I don't know why but I had forgiven her. I still didn't like her very much but… I forgive her. She did admit it was out of lust. I suppose it was a complement… that the girl Hikari loved lusted over me. Yes, I'll take it as one.

"The third one I did out of pity and gratitude… and though it felt good, I don't feel so happy that I did." I said before I turned to my cigarette and took in another huff. I decided to end it there… if she wanted to make more of it… she'll have to ask herself I'm not about to reveal it all on my own.

"Why not?" she asked, I supposed that she meant why I don't feel happy about kissing the third girl.

"Why…" indeed… I took another breath of smoke, puffing it out into a quick stream and gave a quick thought of how to phrase my response. "probably… because I feel like it might be giving her false hope."

"False hope?" She repeated in question… not that it was hard to imagine that it be anything but a question.

I nodded and puffed another stream of smoke. "Yeah… I don't want her to think that I might just fall for her eventually just because I kissed her…" It was the whole truth… I had those same feelings myself, I thought that Hikari's feelings might change if she realized mine... But I never really got to that part. Maybe my approach or something was wrong… I don't really know anymore. I just want things to the way it was even if just on the surface, it certainly would be easier to just go on with one's life that way.

She didn't say anything after that. A few moments pass and my cigarette was just about finished. I took a deeper huff than usual to just finish it all quickly and light another one.

Then out of no where she asked, "Why do you like Hikari?" which sounded incredibly wrong, don't usually people ask what one likes about someone? And for some reason it annoyed me… and I just had give her a painfully cheeky response.

"Why do you have so many questions?" I blurted out angrily… I didn't really mean to though. The frustration is still there in my heart and her question almost feels like putting salt on an open wound.

"I'm sorry…" she apologized, almost instantly. She cowered a little and it almost appeared like she was cringing waiting for a blow from me to come. If anyone saw us right now they would probably never believe that she had the guts to forcefully kiss me last week. I inwardly sighed… not that I made me feel better.

"Me too… I didn't mean it like that." I apologized, more or less, before taking another huff out of my cigarette… which oddly tasted a little bitter than before. I puffed the smoke all out, creating a think line of smoke that slowly dispersed in the air. I took a few seconds to think about it… but nothing came to my mind. "I don't know anymore…"

A soft, "Eh?!" came out from her lips which made me wonder if she's easily surprised or something else entirely, but I decided to ignore it and go on with my point.

"Or maybe I should say… I don't know… why I like her… I didn't really need a reason why… she was Hikari." It's sort of true. The way I fell for her didn't require me knowing her. It was just something my heart couldn't avoid. I would have probably fallen for her even if she had a sadistic personality. I'm sure I would have fallen for her bad if she had A…

Anyway… It was love at first sight. From the very moment I saw her singing at the church's backyard garden… I thought my heart stopped for a few seconds, only to start up again to chase her… catch her… and learn her name. I never truly thought about the future… my or our future… I just wanted to be beside her. But I guess that will end… or already has.

"That didn't sound as romantic as the thought could be." she cheekily said.

"It doesn't have to… It's not like it'll matter anymore." I felt a smile creep up my lips. I never thought to be romantic… I always showed Hikari how I felt and acted like I had claimed her already. She treated it like a joke and I never corrected her. As stupid as it was maybe I was afraid of what she'd do if she realized it… would she accept me? Or would she reject me? And when I finally had the guts to try something, I made it flop badly.

I sighed very softly. I could not look at her… my chest was a big mix of so many feelings that it was hard to tell what exactly I felt. But the silence made it easier to end the topic and move on which I silently thanked her for then finished my cigarette. By the time I had finished it, put the light out and threw the cigarette butt away I realized something… I was hungry. And though I wasn't exactly looking forward to eating it… I just didn't have it in me to just walk up to a trash can and throw the lunch I made for myself away.

I took it out from behind me; the bento box of death… wrapped in a black bandana that made me feel less and less anticipating of the meal. I didn't know why I had two chopsticks at the time, but I guess it was in case Tsubomi found me… maybe I was hoping my culinary skills or the lack thereof… would make me less appealing to her or return to the time she was tolerating my presence.

But I opened it anyway… and I could tell that Ootori was looking at it. Which immediately brought a new thought to sadistically punish the… … to punish her. "You want some?" I asked as I held out a pair of chopsticks for her to use.

To my delight she took it and proceeded to take a sample of my Tamagoyaki of doom and despair, yes a mouthful to say but that's what you'd feel if you ate it and I should mention it looked horribly black and misshapen to start with, she ate it without hesitation… which made me wonder why for a second before deciding not to care. She grimaced and cringed..? It must have been all that soy sauce that I accidentally spilled in the mixture.

It was strange… she was suffering from the food I purposely fed her and yet here I am not laughing at her misery. I didn't wonder why. Instead I said, "That bad huh?" and looked down on the food a little disinterestedly. "I guess it's to be expected." I felt a tiny bit depressed when I said that… I'm not sure why but when she took the chopsticks from me and took the piece of food from the box, I felt this small wish inside that wanted her to tell me it was good… like that magical effect of love that makes anything made by the one you like delicious beyond understanding.

"You can just spit it out… there's no need to force yourself for me." Oddly… I knew I didn't mean those words that I said with so much detachment. I wanted her to eat it all… suffer and in the end say it was delicious and that it was the greatest thing she's ever tasted, eat every last bite of my lunch for me, then go to the infirmary and tell the nurse to hide the fact that she threw up or got sick.

It felt like a needle prick my heart when she spat out the vile tasting Tamagoyaki. I sighed… hiding it between her spitting and partially choking out the disgusting food. I took a piece with my own pair of chopsticks, swiftly bringing it into my mouth… was horrible and it made me wonder, if I could eat this with a happy face if Hikari made it for me…

And the answer came to me instantly… I would. I found myself swallowing and taking another piece, chewing, swallowing, taking another piece, chewing, swallowing… I could taste all the things I placed in and the things I accidentally added. It was enough to make your saliva turn slimy and sticky. But when I imagined Hikari making something like this, not that she would… I know she can cook. But really making myself believe she cooked this… it made it easier to swallow.

"How can you eat that?" She asked… not the least bit holding her disgust.

I just smiled and said, "Like this." Before doing what I had previously done to the first few disgusting morsels, imagined that Hikari made it for me then ate it. She looked like she wanted to throw up just imagining how it must taste as I ate.

"Doesn't it taste bad?!" she asked… looking almost sick from just watching me eat this.

But I just smiled and said, "It was awful!" in an almost happy tone.

"Why are you eat it then?" she cringed looking like she might throw up soon.

I just shrugged and said, "It's not so bad…" I didn't mean it… It was absolutely horrible! It took a lot of my self control and constant internal reminder about who I was to believe made this to be able to eat it with a calm happy and contented smile. I took out another stick of cigarette, lit it and took a huff. I choked and coughed again… like it was my first time all over again. While trying to relax, I proceeded to clean up after myself. It wasn't easy… there was no denying that what I ate wasn't settling down in my stomach like a normal meal, but I'd like to think that if I can take this pain, hide it until it goes away… I can do the same for my feelings.

From the corner of my eye, I noticed that Ootori looked like she wanted to say or point something out. I decided to let her… and be over with it. "What's on your mind?" I said.

"Ah…" she paused… and seemed to be in thought for a while. She was probably unsure of what to say or how to say it. I looked her way soon enough to catch her absently nod to herself probably making the decision to tell me what ever it was. She then said, "I think you're being self destructive…"

I felt an inner me smile... when her voice sounded so concerned. 'I know that…' was what I said to myself. I looked up to the sky and said, "I think so too."

I felt empty… like the nearly cloudless sky or a plain white bread. Anyway I just watched the sky; I didn't feel like saying anything more.

We were quiet for a while. But the silence brought up sad and depressing memories. Many of them… some of them recent… some were older ones. But one memory stood out from the rest of them… and it was Ootori's kiss.

The shuddering feeling of dread when I heard the first three words, "I like you…" I wanted to hear someone say that to me and of course the way Hikari did so before doesn't count. But I never thought Hikari's girlfriend would be the first to say it to me… full of that desire and passion that any girl had dreamed and wished for. I don't even remember what she said after those words. The kiss though… I didn't struggle from as much as my rationality really wanted. I clearly remember letting her kiss me as tears of… dare I admit it… joy fell from my eyes. I was happy that someone liked me enough to do that… even if it was Ootori.

Who would have thought my first kisses would be so memorable. I sighed and was about to take out another stick when I noticed that she was staring at me.

No… not staring exactly… she had this absent look in her eyes like she was thinking of something deep. I moved closer to her to check if she was indeed not looking at me, just at my direction. "Hmmm…"

I looked straight into her eyes… my face inches from her. If someone saw us this would be in the bulletin board by tomorrow morning. But I can't possibly get anymore attention that I already want… or don't… and decided to do it anyway.

After a few seconds, I noticed her eyes began taking notice of me before almost jumping away in surprise. Seeing that she I had her attention now, I decided to ask, "Are you ok? You look more troubled than I do." It was an expression of course… I can't exactly tell how troubled I look.

She nodded and said, "I'll be alright." I looked at her once more before moving away. I sat down, closer to her… I just felt too lazy to move to far.

We sat in a long silence again… that was when I felt strange. To be more exact my stomach did. I curled up subconsciously maybe I thought that doing so would reduce the pain I felt.

Then… I just blacked out.

…

When I woke up, I was drenched in a cold sweat; my stomach ached and was incredibly dizzy. I struggled to get out of bed and rush out to a nearby lavatory. But my balance failed me… and I found myself crashing on the next bed with my hand on my mouth struggling to keep whatever it was that wanted to come out through my mouth down.

I soon heard footsteps and heard the familiar voice of the school's regular nurse, Anegasaki Tae. "Nanto-san? How do you… hang on for a few more seconds!" she immediately rushed somewhere. She came back three to five seconds later with a bucket, a good quarter of filled with water and some sanitary chemical, and placed it right in front of my face. And as if on cue I blew chunks.

A few excruciating and disgusting minutes later, it all came out… I must have regurgitated everything I ate, breakfast included.

"What have you been eating?" she asked with a not so exaggerated gasp.

I didn't answer and just looked at the bucket, which was full of something blackish brown and disgustingly bubbly, hoping that was everything.

"How do you feel?"

I gave her a look… I'm not quite sure what kind exactly but it was the best I could do with all my cheekiness and dignity drained out of me for the time being.

"Sorry… but really how or what do you feel?" she placed a hand on my forehead to check my temperature as she asked, which I know was partly concern but mostly because it was her job.

"I feel like I ate a bunch of nearly expired sushi, drank soy sauce green and slimy with wasabi and someone punched my gut making me do it over again in one swallow." I grimly described with all the gore and cheekiness I could muster.

She smiled and said, "If you can joke like that… I'm sure you can make a complete recovery… in less than a day, probably a few hours if you can get something proper to eat."

I rolled my eyes and said, "I hope so..." meaning something completely different from my physical health.

"The small fever you had while you were out is gone too." She added as she walked to the clinic sink to wet a clean towel and hands it to me.

"I had a fever?" I asked.

She laughed a little and told me not to worry because it wasn't high and would be gone if I could get more rest. She then went away to dispose of the bucket or to be more precise it's contents. I laid back down on the bed after wiping my face with a wet towel she handed to me earlier. And I then wondered… how did I get there.

The last that I could remember was that I was with Ootori back by the lake… I felt pain then… I'm guessing I fainted or fell asleep.

The nurse then returned with the bucket and a fresh batch of the water solution which she placed somewhere safe and close by.

And before she could say anything I asked her, "How did I get here?"

"Well about two hours ago… I heard someone knocking by, what I would guess, using one's foot." I was having a hard time imagining Ootori doing some like that but I allowed her to continue. "When I opened the door I found you cradled in Ootori Amane's arms like a princess." I almost cringed at the image that crept up my thoughts… Ootori's Princess was one of the last things I'd want to be. "She told me that one moment the two of you were sitting somewhere the next she noticed you've fainted and she rushed to bring you here."

"I see." I inwardly thanked Ootori for telling only enough detail to explain how it came to be that she was the one that brought me there.

"Seeing the two of you like that was so dreamy…" she looked a little dazed like her mind was heading somewhere far away.

I rolled my eyes again this time holding my tongue not that she'd probably hear what I said. After a few minutes she regains herself and tells me to rest for a while longer or if I wanted I could sleep and she'd wake me when classes were officially over. I nodded and decided to rest for a little bit more.

But after a few minutes of lying down my stomach decided to lessen my dignity even further and let out a loud and very distinctive growl. Nurse Anegasaki held her laughter, for which I was almost grateful… almost because she laughed loud and hard when my stomach repeated the act five seconds later.

To save face, I immediately stood up straighten up my uniform and proceeded to walk out the door while she was busy laughing. But before I could fully open the door she stopped me and said, "Wait!!... Don't forget your jacket." as she pointed at the hanger rack by the door. I took it and put it on immediately. I walked out and half slammed the door behind me only to hear her still laughing inside.

Deciding that the best way to remedy this situation was to get something to eat, and not berate the nurse, I quickly headed to the cafeteria for a snack.

About two minutes later, I was about two halls away from the cafeteria when my eye spied a certain pink haired girl. I must not have been thinking straight as I didn't do anything to avoid her seeing me.

"Yaya-sa..senpai!" she called out, trying to hide her mistake of calling me san with a bright innocent smile.

"Hi… Tsubomi..." I said raising my hand to give her a sort of hand wave that I'm sure didn't look quite right. "I'm in a hurry. I'll see you later." I said as I continued to walk not bothering to wait for her to respond.

"But senpai!... where…?" her question died in the air as my stomach's growl echoing in the empty hall. "… oh…" was the only thing she could say but it was evident with her wide eyes that it surprised her.

And then another event of me not thinking straight was when I said these words… "Would you like to join me?"

She blushed and nodded before walking up to me and joining my pace towards the cafeteria.

Minutes later, we shared a table… my side full of food as if I had not eaten in days. I was about to put the third piece of BLT sandwich into my mouth when I noticed that Tsubomi looked like she wanted to say or ask something. And against a wiser judgment I said to her, "What's on your mind Tsubomi?"

She swallowed nervously and audibly… she looked away from left to right for a moment probably pondering if she should speak her mind or if someone was there to listen in. Then she looked down and just said, "It's nothing."

I should have let the conversation die there but I was obviously not myself today for I told her, "Spit it out already." before taking a big bite of sandwich.

Pouting a little she looked at me like a child being forced to take a bath or do a chore she hates… but then she gave me a sad look and asked, "You know I love you right?"

I choked… right then the bits of bacon decided to teasingly enter my left lung while a piece of tomato the right and what I'm sure was a big piece of lettuce stuck quite near my tonsils. I immediately took hold of glass of water I had place beside my tomato soup and downed it all in a few gulps then releasing a relieved sigh.

"I'm sorry…" she said looking down and depressed again.

There was a part of me that wanted to tell her off and scold her especially after the short suffering induced by a sandwich, but giving consideration to her feelings and myself to blame for telling her to just say what she wanted… it was partially my fault. "It's ok… ahem." I coughed a little as a result of human reflex.

I looked at her and tried to think of something to say. I know that she's resolved to get the two of us together… she has told me so more than twice before. Her methods are questionable though… After all I had told her straight that I cannot return her feelings.

… Nothing came to mind and I proceeded to continue eating. She looked desperate, I felt sorry for her… but of course I did not want to encourage her behavior. I don't want to deepen her heartache… but I can't think of anything that will discourage her from pursuing me without breaking her heart. "You know, Tsubomi… that I don't feel the same for you…"

"But!-" she tried to say something but I immediately silenced her with a gesture.

"Now I just want to tell you that if you've really set your heart and sights for me… I won't argue anymore. But acting like this… and thinking I'm just about yours already isn't really going to change my mind." I said to her with a soft calm voice.

"Then… how?" she asked, her voice sounding quite desperate.

I answered as best as I could without sounding inclined to break her heart or encourage her to pursue her feelings for me. "I don't know… maybe you just have to be yourself? We're great friends even though we don't always act like it… we get along well enough…"

"And maybe that will deepen for you someday?" she asked, almost carefully.

Shrugging my shoulders and gave her a 'one can only hope' smile as I kept my eyes on her face as I said on word, "Maybe…"

"Was that how you fell for Hikari-senpai?" she asked looking sad, curious and with a hint of guilt… as if it was it was the most scandalous topic in the whole world.

I shook my head and said, "No…" with a soft, happy and proud smile.

She bent her head to the side, her eyes looking straight towards mine. "Then how?"

I smiled as I looked at her. Recalled the feeling that hit me the day Hikari and I met. There were no words to describe how I felt that day... I'd have to be a great poet or writer to even try… I decided not to answer her.

Seeing my silence she asked, "It was love at first sight. Wasn't it?"

All I could do was nod.

She smiled… she seemed impressed or touched by the thought of a love at first sight. But then she frowned, looked down again and said, "I'm envious of her."

I smiled and told her, "I'm envious of you."

"EH?!" She exclaimed and looked at me with a dumbfounded expression.

My smile widened and I could feel my heart and cheeks warm up as I said, "I wish I could have just told Hikari how I felt when I had the chance…" paused and mentally berated myself with a short 'You know you had a lot of them before!' speech in my head before continuing, "and what ever her answer may be, still continue being her friend. And if she rejects me; I'd tell her that I haven't given up on her and still show her how much I love her."

She blushed again… and I'd believe I had just given her a complement then, and I hoped she took it as such. We were quiet for a while and I was able to continue my meal. But when I had to get a fresh helping of water, returned and saw that she had not move… I felt worried for a moment. At least until she spoke again.

"So have you picked a club to join yet?" she asked as she looked away.

"Huh?" I heard the question but the long and uneasy silence had temporarily dulled my response time.

She looked anxious and had a tendency to wiggle from left to right. "Well you know… You quitted the saintly chorus and I was just wondering what you're doing?" she was slowly starting to look and sound like the Tsubomi I knew before I took her to that weekend outing.

"Oh… I've become involved with Chikaru's project for the festival." I could feel that I smiled warmly inside as I politely answered her question. I know she still felt quite awkward, but I deeply appreciated that attempted to try shifting her methods… that is if that's what she's trying to do. I said a little uninterestedly.

"Really? Is it a Lulim school project?" her voice hinting excitement.

"More like a club thing." I shrugged after I answered.

"What are you all doing for the festival?" she asked, her eyes brimming with curiosity.

"Hmm… I'm not sure if it's ok to tell. I'll have to ask Chikaru, she might be planning to surprise everyone." I told her.

Then we exchanged insults… starting from me being stingy and somehow ended with her being born with a tomato colored cheek. Before we laughed like we never had laughed before. It almost felt like we were back to how it was two weeks ago… Bickering and annoying each other's heads off. I know I enjoyed those days... Tsubomi's company had always been my recluse from my feelings for Hikari. The times where we yelled at each other were probably the only moments of my days that my mind could not keep a picture of Hikari.

We spent the rest of the time while I was eating to talk, she avoided topics and things that might lead to a conversation about what happened between us. And for that I'm very grateful. Instead she focused on asking other things about me and telling me more about herself. I found myself smiling inside… and almost saying, "I just might." to her out loud.

I then checked the wall clock and learned that it had been about twenty or thirty minutes since I came here with her. And just a few more minutes before class officially ends and everyone will move to their clubs. And I should get going to Lulim soon…

"Ne… Tsubomi do you mind telling Hikari to bring my bag to the dorms with her?" I asked, sounding a little more pleasant than usual.

"I could just bring it myself if you want." She suggested to me… But I was sure that she was curious as to why I had asked when our classroom was just a hall and a staircase away.

"Either way is fine." I said, hoping that would be the end of that topic.

"Ok… but… why don't you get it yourself?" she asked and I noted that I was glad I anticipated the question early enough to think of a decent lie.

"I just don't feel like climbing the stairs a-…" I found myself hanging there for a second… _'and I don't really want to see Hikari, or the other way around, right now…'_ the words I wanted no one to hear.

"…if I can avoid it." It wasn't that bad or unbelievable a lie, I think I sounded lazy enough to pull the words off. But the truth was I had a feeling that Hikari would want to come and follow me to Lulim, especially today since the saintly chorus wouldn't be meeting and since I believe I heard that the actors for the dorm's play were suppose to attend a meeting today. I had reasons not to want to see Hikari, which is funny since I've always made anything a reason to see her… where did the good times go?

"…" she was silent for a moment and evidently scrutinizing my face. It looked like she wasn't going to believe me. But then she shrugged and smiled. "Ok then…"

I smiled thankfully and stood up to clean up the dishes I used. But before I could head off… she said, "But what should I say if she asks me where you are?"

I turned back to her and answered, "Tell her that I was in a hurry and you're not really sure where… It's almost the truth anyway."

She frowned at that, probably noting to herself that she didn't see me as a person who could lie to the one I had feelings for. But she nodded anyway giving me a soft, "Ok."

"Thanks! I'll see you later." I then turned and surrendered my dished to be washed. I then headed for the door only to look back at Tsubomi who was now half way out of the door opposite of the one I was about to use. I was glad that she decided not to look back before she left the cafeteria because I was not sure I could forgive myself if she had a frown on her face.

Making my way towards Lulim wasn't difficult. It was probably about ten to fifteen minute walk depending on one's pace. I was on my way to the music room that Chikaru had invited me to when I had this weird "being watched" feeling. And for someone like me who was used to getting looked at, because I was more on stage enough thanks to the saintly chorus, this certainly felt weird and different. I wondered if it was because I wasn't in my own school or that maybe those lot of days that I had not attended the choir made me feel less impervious to this feeling.

But as I was wondering this, I felt someone touch me with one finger from behind. Normally that wouldn't faze me, but… in this new environment, new situation, the more or less awkward situation with Tsubomi and Hikari… and the fact that who ever it was behind me had coincidentally touched one few sensitive spots of my back that- completely freaked me out.

And… the only thing my instinct told me to do was to…

"**IIIIIIIIIIIIIYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"**

… scream.

Very surprised and scared senseless to the point that I had panicked and had somehow completely forgotten how to properly take a step, or how to keep my balance at all, because when I tried to turn towards who ever it was behind me I found myself falling painfully on my backside cringing a little as it stung me a bit on the cold tile floor. And I almost surprised myself for not yelling the pain out.

"Yaya-san! Are you alright?"

I heard and recognized the voice, looked up and saw that my guess was right. "Chi-ka-ru…-san" I slowly muttered each syllable, I almost regretted doing so as there was so much pain in the tone of my voice.

She knelt in front of me, worry written in thick bold letters in face. "Where does it hurt?" she instinctively posed her hands in front of me- completely unsure of what to do just yet.

"My butt… but I'm pretty sure I didn't break anything, except a little piece of my pride." I said jokingly, though my voice still had a big hint of pain in it when I did.

Chikaru smiled, she seemed quite relieved to hear me joke about my pride when she was more worried about my physical well being.

I looked at my behind instinctively… not a lot of people can look behind them and see their own backside- or at least not that far. When I turned my head back to face Chikaru I almost let out a yelp in surprise when I saw her face was quite close to mine. She had this smile that I don't think anyone has ever deciphered or translated its meaning… I wondered if she could teach me how to do that.

"Chikaru-?" I called out to her when her gaze was taking too long and started making me feel uncomfortable.

"I can see why so many have set their eyes on you." Her voice was unusually soft and almost seductive that I was almost glad my butt hurt enough that I didn't shiver from the tone of her voice. I swear her voice sound electrifying.

"Excuse me?" I managed to mumble out without getting my quickening heart beat to sound with my voice.

But instead of answering she stood up straight and offered me her hand. It wasn't most excellent of evasions, I haven't decided whether I'd like to continue or let the topic die… but then again I don't even want to think about where the subject would lead to. I took her hand and stood up, dusting and straightening my uniform as soon as I regained my balance. I then turned towards her and opened my mouth, my mind half heartedly set on following up the previous topic- when, she quickly motioned herself behind me and playfully pushed me to the direction of the music room.

The rest of the meeting and practice goes without a hitch. Chikaru was the most patient of tutors, Remon and Kizuna seemed to have this way of properly rooting for a person- because I felt quite motivated the whole time. I made a whole lot of mistakes with my notes, the two extra cords that a violin didn't have was a big change… not to mention the size, weight of the instrument, and my freshly injured fingers... But it was quite fun and the best part was… Hikari didn't come into my mind the whole time.

One thing though- almost during the whole time I was in Lulim I felt that weird feeling of being watched. I'm not sure whether I was imagining it or something but it has not proved itself harmful to me in anyway, just barely becoming an irritation… so I decided not to tell Chikaru or anyone about it. I don't wanna risk embarrassing my self if it's just my imagination.

Chikaru had told me that I could leave first, but somehow I just wanted to delay the day or at least the part where I return to the dorm if at least for a while longer… so I volunteered to stay and clean up. I soon learned why she told me to leave first though… you see, although Lulim students are quite open to students from Spica and Miator, it seems that some of their teachers aren't. And I had a front seat view of a lecture of the rules of Lulim… all forty five minutes and twenty nine seconds of "the Lulim school rules (video edition)". I am now unable to use the "Ignorance: excuse. And also I have a new found respect for Lulim Students, in particular can now be seen in a different light through my eyes, Chikaru, their student president especially… after all if they can have all that fun and seem so free with all those rules, they deserve my respect and adoration! I'm so glad I chose St. Spica.

Anyway… I was lucky to return to an empty dorm room. If Tsubomi had indeed brought my bag then she'll either deliver it later or I'll have to pick it up at her room. And I'm hoping it's the later… anything to spend less time alone with Hikari. I can act it out all I want… and I believe I can do it, but it's quite painful even though I've accepted it already.

I decided to take a bath- I mean after all that sweat one can work up playing an instrument, especially one as big and heavy as a guitar, I can only imagine what kind of person doesn't take one as soon as ones able.

The water stung my hands and it did little to dull the pain in my heart. Minutes passed somehow I just didn't feel like leaving the shower at all, because for the next ten or something minutes I did nothing but lean on the wall and watched the water that passed the drain. I soon realized that I was doing something relatively stupid when the warm water began to pass through my eyes and made them itch. I, of course, scratched them and lightly cursed at my own stupidity before getting out of the shower.

It would have surprised me that Hikari wasn't back yet, but I didn't notice it until I was dressed and my eyes stopped feeling so irritated. I did some homework, playing the music that Chikaru had lent to me, while waiting for dinner.

Hikari came back just as soon as it was time for dinner. I dared not to ask where she had been all this time, I figured the less I know... the less I'd think about her. We headed down for dinner, the earphones of Chikaru's player still in my ears with its volume probably loud enough to block someone calling for me.

Dinner was uneventful, or should I say… I ignored whatever happened during dinner, and since no one tapped my shoulder to get my attention… I'm guessing that nothing that needed my attention really happened anyway.

After dinner I decided to get something I've been putting off since I got back from my (our, if I count Tsubomi) weekend outing and that was to make peace with Amane. Picking up the plainly gift wrapped parcel on my table, I headed of to the senior's floor of the building… I was able to avoid telling Hikari anything about it because she had chosen that time to take a bath. Though what really surprised me is having avoided a conversation with her that long, since we entered the classroom, and considering she was rather hard on me the last time I avoided her… I immediately shook my head and those thoughts with it.

I stood in front of Amane's room. Oddly… I expected fans who fancy themselves as her body guards standing outside her door and blocking everyone who might want to have a conversation with her. Looking down, I frowned at the package and asked myself if I really wanted to do this… and the answer was bafflingly uncertain. I did want to show her that there were no hard feelings, but at the same time I didn't want her to feel close to me or something relatively close. I can't explain it… and I don't think I'd want anyone to explain it to me either.

Anyway, before I could turn away or something… I knocked; I swear I didn't do it! But it was hard to deny that the hand that knocked was connected to my wrist that was connected to my arm etc… etc…

And soon enough I heard foot steps coming from the inside then soon after that- "yee… Yaya-sama?!" Amane almost yelled out the honorific in surprise when she saw me standing outside her door.

Embarrassment, that I didn't know was even there, and uncertainty was pushed aside when my temper flared a bit when she called me with such a high honorific. "Again… what's with you calling me that…?" I yelled, not quite loud enough to be heard by the neighbors but quite enough to have a mean angry tone.

"Ah… eh… It's a sign of my complete and outmost respect for you…?" I wondered why her statement sounded more like question, but I decided to let it slide for now.

"Anyway… Here." I raised the hand that held the gift and offered it to her.

"What's this?" She asked completely awestruck.

I didn't really notice that I had a blush on my cheeks until later… but I knew I was a little embarrassed to be giving her this present. "It's a peace offering and a thank you!... for helping me earlier this afternoon."

"It was nothing… I just did what anyone would do." She said as she tentatively took the present from me with one hand while the other scratched her cheek in a sheepish sign of humility. And humility had got to be one of the things I thought wasn't part of her character or at least she wouldn't openly show it like she's doing so right now.

"…" I wasn't really sure why but I didn't like it. I didn't like seeing parts of her that made me think there was more to her than just being 'Spica's Prince', 'The School Idol' and 'the one who took Hikari away from me.' I wanted to hate her, ignore her, and show her that not everyone loves her… but what was the point? Doing so would only make Hikari dislike me, it would require some effort to actually show someone you hated them, and maybe I just didn't like hating people… a childhood friend of mine said it was bad for one's karma.

But I'm sure that I don't want to get any closer to her. That much at least I will put an effort to starting now. I looked at her again, bowed lightly and said; "Well… a have goodnight." With that I quickly turned and walked away. But as I did I suddenly felt splitting headache and lost my balance. I heard her voice sometime in that moment, but I didn't have the time or I just wasn't listening as I was expecting to meet the floor and was I bracing myself for the imminent impact with the floor.

It never came. Instead I found myself in her arms… again.

"Ootori…" I muttered without thinking.

She blushed… then I felt I did too. She tried to look away, her face marked with a guilty blush and her voice laced with the meekness that I've heard in only one other person... "Are you ok? How are you feeling?"

I tried to force nod, but instead my hands shot up to my head and tried to ease my own physical suffering. I could help but let out a hiss in pain and a silent curse to the incredibly bad timing of the ailment.

Amane helped me up to my feet and half carried half dragged my back into her room… I unfortunately was not in the condition to resist. She laid me down on her bed, which I was sure didn't smell the least bit like her… but it being the only bed in the room ruled out the possibility that it's wasn't her bed.

She knelt on the floor and critically watched my face with an unhidden expression of worry on hers. After what seemed like an eternity of pain… the headache eased and so did the tension I sensed from her. "How are you feeling?" She asked in a soft tone of voice.

Rage burned in me as soon as the pain disappeared. I wasn't sure why, but I was angry… at her and without thinking I said, "I don't need your help!" my voice sounded screechy and I couldn't help but looked away.

"I'm sorry." she guiltily whispered.

I said nothing and tried to sit up on my own.

"I… never meant to hurt or insult your pride." She humbly said looking at me with guilt and worry.

"!" It was then that I realized why I was so angry. I didn't want to appear weak to anyone… especially Hikari and her. It also explained my hesitation into coming to see her. A rough and uncertain, "Mmmm…" was all that I could give as a sure response.

"I'm a fan of yours. I love going to your recitals and choir concerts." Her words sounded passionate and all but something told me it wasn't true.

"It's mandatory for all students..." And even worse yet I surprised myself that I played along with her lie. Well I can't truly be sure if it is a lie on gut feeling alone… but it did irritate me.

She reasoned back saying, "It's a luxury to me!" with enough zeal that it almost sounded convincing.

"…" and I didn't know what or how to react to that. I was silent for a bit… my brewing anger faded all that was left was confusion and embarrassment. I looked away, I was sure my cheeks were quite red and warm. "…why are you telling me this."

I felt her smile, I don't know why but I'm quite sure she did. "It's the only way I can say that I…"

And suddenly I felt like I knew what was coming and to prevent more embarrassment or weird feelings… I turned to her, my eyes now too held the warmness that was spreading to the rest of my face, and yelled out, **"Wait! Don't you dare say it!"**

She stopped, smiled at me with her eyes glowing of mischief that you never thought would look good on her… until you see it. Looking at me straight in the eyes, the timid and apprehensive Amane was no where to be found. She leaned forward, just a tiny bit… a masterful touch I tell you and finished her sentence, "…Like you."

My heart raced… and I cursed out loud, turned my head away from her to hide what ever color it was that my face had taken up. "I told you not to say it…" I scolded her, my with teeth grit together but my tone probably wasn't at all near convincing. I cursed myself silently, I hated that she made me feel this way. She wasn't even my type.

"I'm sorry." Her apology sounded rehearsed, like she had played it over a hundred times in her mind, chose the best tone and feeling that accompanied it before it came out from her mouth.

But even so… it made my heart beat unsteadily. I really hated that she made feel this way… I mean why her?! Of all people! Tsubomi I'd be ok with… Hikari I'd be so happy I could probably die… all those silly fans of mine I'd even consider- but Ootori?... I don't know what to feel.

Feeling that my blush had eased a little I turned to her, but just enough for me to see her from the corner of my eye, and examined the expression on her face. I frowned, seeing that the guilt and truthfulness that I heard from her voice was nowhere near her face. And with a harsh, "No you're not." I tried to save what little pride I had left in her eyes.

It disappointed me that she wasn't the least bit affected by my stern retort. Instead she smiled, no grinned, playfully at me and said, "hmmm… Half?" in tone so mischievous I was beginning to wonder if this really was Ootori Amane.

She leaned closer… and instantly I began to worry. An instinctively bite on my lip… paused her advance but only for a very short moment, which would have surprised me if I had not thought she'd feel even a bit guilty of what she was doing. "I'm going to kill you…" I wanted to declare the outrage I felt, and I never meant those words more than today... But those same words kept dying behind my throat.

Her hand reached out and cupped my cheek, gently urging me to face her. I did so… but I could have sworn I told my body not to budge. In a few heart choking seconds… there her eyes were… in front my own. Staring at me with the deviousness that… I never thought she could pull off.

She leaned even closer… and I knew what was about to happen next. I didn't want it to happen. But my body wouldn't listen to me.

My eyes closed, on its own, and I realized that my body wanted this… a part of me, a strong part of me, wanted this. There was something about the way she made me feel that my body wanted… and I think she knew that, and that is why she was able to keep up this strong and courageous charade. I tried to muster my will to lash out to her, anything at all… it didn't even have to make sense, so long as it'll confuse her and stop her from doing what I feared she was going to do.

But nothing came- my voice just wouldn't come at my will… my body didn't listen and fate decided nothing would stop her.

I could feel her closeness... her lips just almost touching mine. Her breathing tickled my skin. And the scent of lemon soap that surrounded the air she occupied filled my lungs. I swallowed, or my body did… god knows that I have lost control of my body moments ago.

She kissed me, softly… with the tenderness that I dream someone would give me or I'd give Hikari. Her lips caressed mine, sensually warming them and coating them lightly with her taste. My left eye opened and immediately closed shut, not wanting to believe how beautiful she looked right then. A free hand lightly rubbed the full of my back- gently, teasingly, sensually... The hand that cupped my cheek had moved up, and gently brushed into my hair… I never thought such a simple act could feel so incredible.

The kiss gave me a mix of heaven and hell. Heaven because it had felt so wonderful… hell because I hated that I enjoyed a kiss from her. And when she started withdrew... I hated the part of me that kissed her back and stopped her. Yes, I kissed her! And when I found myself slipping my tongue into her mouth to deepen the kiss, I wanted to bite it off… right then and there. But I didn't…

I felt lost… my kiss was a misplaced passion, misplaced because I didn't want to feel passion for her. And it ate at me, gnawing at my soul daring to rip out my heart.

Our lips parted… and as much as it pains me to admit it most of the effort of doing so was hers. I slowly opened my eyes and watched as she slowly withdrew from me and stood up from the bed. I noticed, thought it was barely discernible, that she had difficulty keeping herself balanced… and it would have made me smile, had she not been who she was.

I was somehow able to regain some of my control and composure. Although I wasn't quite sure if it was enough… but I decided to risk it anyway. I had to get out of there. My happiness and Hikari's was in the balance. I will not be a part of the reason Ootori breaks her heart!

My legs moved and my feet had landed on the floor. I praised myself inwardly. It almost feels like I had lost control of them for so long and I'm so happy to gain them back.

Next, my hands and knees helped me up to my feet. I nearly smiled when my eyes saw the bewildered look on Ootori's face. Then before my body gets the chance to betray me again, I stalked out of her room- mumbling, "I have to go…" in a grungy voice.

A hand that I was sure I was controlling grabbed the knob of her door and twisted it opened then I walked out. I did not give her the chance to react as I slammed the door behind myself loud enough that I'm sure a neighbor or two heard it.

I found myself taking deep breaths, my face still felt flashed from the enrapturing kiss we shared and my heart still beat in it's unstable pace.

"I'm sorry." I heard her say to the door. Part of me wanted to say something and it was that same annoying part that kissed her earlier. I didn't give her a reply.

I looked around, and was almost relieved that no one decided to bother checking on who slammed who's door. Taking a step, a slow pace at first before quickly increasing into a soft sprint I rushed away from the senior's floor.

Where my feet took me surprised me. Room 119… Tsubomi's room. I've never been here before… I just know the room number. But why I was here, was simple… I had to erase Ootori from my body or at the very least, erase the feeling her kiss gave me.

I raised my hand and hesitantly knocked. The response was nearly instant. Tsubomi let out a kind yell, "Just a second! I'll be right there." I never was quite literal with that statement myself… but oddly today I found myself counting just how many seconds it was going to take her to open that door.

I reached twenty two before Tsubomi opened the door with surprised gasp. "Yaya-sem…-" she looked around the halls before, "Yaya-san, is something wrong?"

My body reacted and let out a seemingly forced half smile. It made me feel good that she was able to somehow determine that something was wrong without me telling her. And for now I needed something from her and I didn't have the time to explain it. I grabbed her wrist and gently dragged her out of her own room with only a quick, "Come with me." were my only instructions.

She came, without the least bit of a struggle. I escorted her out of the building and into the dorm's garden. I searched for a blind spot… anywhere that we wouldn't be seen.

I pushed her behind a tree and held her tight. She lets out a soft gasp, but her voice didn't hide her surprise. She looked up to me; her lemon colored eyes nervously shook and glistened in the bright moon light, her face flushed a shade darker than her sakura colored hair, and her usually pale and unpainted lips looked quite delicious and pink as a pale red rose. I could feel our hearts beat faster from where our breasts touched. My hands moved and found hers, entwining each finger around hers.

I leaned down and said, "I have a lot to explain and maybe apologize for… but for now-" I paused… I could barely hold myself. I wanted to, No, I needed to kiss her so badly. I swallowed the knot that formed in my throat and continued "-for now, I need you."

I immediately closed the gap between us and crashed my lips onto hers into a deep rough and passionate kiss. And to my surprise she wasted no time and immediately kissed me back with nearly the same vigor.

I could feel my body exhibiting the same passion and similar emotions I felt minutes ago in Ootori's room. No one could possibly imagine the relief I felt in my heart when I felt them stronger at Tsubomi's presence and hands. I let myself go and kissed Tsubomi in a way that I've only dreamt of kissing one girl. I devoured her, savored her taste, pushed her out, and tasted her again before consuming her once more. It was a mind numbing kiss that simply turned one's whole body into gelatin… and by the time we finished I think I forgot how to stand.

The kiss ended mutually. Our breaths were deep and hungry just like our eyes. I watched her lick her lip and couldn't help but feel appreciated maybe even loved and not dirty although desired. My hands let go of hers and found each other on her back, my chin rested on her shoulder and my ear barely but sinfully touching hers. I wrapped myself on to her and tried to relax… and I could say she tried to do the same, but I could feel her stiffen, probably unsure of what to do next, and her heart race to a really excited pace. A smile broke out from my lips…

'This is where I'd rather be.' where the exact lines on my head during those moments; sitting there, with and in Tsubomi's arms, pinning her to the tree of an undetermined genus (not that I cared or that it mattered- for now), enjoying the afterglow of a mind blowing kiss.

Moments past and the heat of the moment dissipated by the night's cool breeze… I decided it was time that I return her to her room. And the least thing I could do after dragging her out here was to escort her back all the way- just in case the sister in charge tonight decided to take her patrol tonight seriously. I stood first and helped her up, giving her a wordless peck on the cheek. The blush that had disappeared a while ago had decided to return to her face with a vengeance… it was so amusingly cute.

We quietly walked back into the dorm. Luckily, we didn't run into the sister in charge and I was saved from partially lying to a servant of God. When we reached her door… she seemed hesitant to open the door and enter.

"Tsubomi?" I called out, a hint wonder and worry wrapped with my voice. She turned to me and looked like she wanted to say or ask something. And I'm sure it had something to do within the lines of our relationship.

I kissed softly on her forehead and wished her a good night. Giving her a warm smile I opened her door for her which I gently pushed her through and sneaked my head in. I asked for my bag, which she immediately nodded on and turned to her desk to pick up, while my eyes quickly scanned if her roommate was present and my inner smile turned to one of mischief when I found that she wasn't. Tsubomi returned handing me my bag and in one swift move I opened the door a touch wider took a small step in and quickly stole a kiss from her lips.

She blushed, surprised… I'm sure I wouldn't have been, but I found it cute nonetheless.

I then said to her, "Let's go out again sometime." in a soft secretive whisper and winked my left eye, with held more than enough mischief that she'd probably have trouble sleeping, before I closed the door as soon as my head had cleared the door frame.

I didn't move at first. Probably I was expecting that she would rush out and ask questions… but she didn't. Instead…

"**YES!!!"** I heard her yell out quite loudly.

She repeated the word about more than a half dozen times, the sound of her feet landing on the floor with a few dull thumps- a sign of an excited hop- before a louder thump and some springs which I'd guess would have been when she jumped on her bed. A snicker escaped my lips but I was somehow able to maintain control of myself and all that came out was a sound almost like a soft choke. I quickly made my escape back to our room.

When I got to the second floor I was force to wait for a few minutes, because the sister was lecturing someone at the other end of the hallway… either for being noisy or some other infraction…

I sneezed silently. It was then that I realized that I was starting to feel a little chilled. And of course, I would be considering I was wearing the smallest of clothes in my dresser. I had not expected to take too long with my small excursion after all. It was just suppose to be an apology, gratitude and a gift drop off… but what did I get? I get molested, technically speaking, by Hikari's suppose to be girlfriend no less, which would have been enough of a reason to kill her… I'll have to talk to Hikari about her girlfriend's "tendencies" if I ever get the chance and courage too.

The sister was finally done lecturing the occupants of a room and slowly continued her rounds, which… much to my dismay too longer than I would have liked it to be. And when she was finally done and moved up to the third floor rooms I rushed to our room as quietly as possible.

When I entered Hikari looked at me, her face had questions all over it… most of them I'm not sure I could answer with honesty. She opened her mouth to say something but then… I sneeze, loud and strong.

"**ACHOOO!"** suddenly I didn't feel so good. That headache earlier returned with a vengeance and now brought some reinforcements in the form of what I'd say was a cold. I cursed inwardly, feeling stupid for getting sick…

I didn't see Hikari move and only noticed that she was close to me soon after the first sneeze. She was holding a box of tissues to me at looking at me with an examining eye. Her lips slowly turned to a frowned before she said, "I think you have cold, Yaya-chan."

"Really?" my voice made it sound like a bad thing… not that it wasn't. But was almost funny actually… I was feeling so hot earlier after all, who would have thought… I'd catch a cold after all 'that'.

Hikari leaned closer and placed a hand on my head but quickly lifted it away then said, "You're burning up!" she sounded almost lecturing. Yet for a moment… her comment on what should have been my fever, my beginning to be delusional brain took as the complement: "You're hot!" of course I shrugged the silly thought almost instantly after I heard my inner voice giggle.

I'm not exactly sure what happened after that. I couldn't recall any memory of what happen between that and finding myself on my bed. The room was dark, cold and oddly dank. And it made me feel horrible. It was that hateful feeling of being hot yet at the same time very cold that I hated from feverish illnesses, colds and the flu most common of them. I sneezed again… and again and again…

A lamp from Hikari's side of the room lit up and I immediately heard her sheets flying. She rushed to my side with the tissue box on one hand, which she wordlessly offers for me to use. A very welcome gesture. I quickly sat up grabbed a few pieces from the box and blew my nose. I think I swore just then, that this day couldn't get any worse but then it donned to me… it was early morning. I swore again inside, this day could get worse.

With a sigh I laid back down only to miss my pillow just enough to hit my head on the head board.

"**IIIITTTAAAAaaaaa…."** I screamed, hissed and winced. Tears of pain daring to trickle from my eyes as both my hands shot up to the back of my head and tried to eased the suffering… (Again)

I heard a giggle, a very soft and muffled giggle. And with no else in the room… I'm sure it was Hikari. I turned to her and true enough she was hiding her smile behind the box of tissue. I just looked at her eyes with a bit of resentment and dropped the issue before it can begin. My lungs were disgusting, my head ache and my whole body was a mix of overheating and near clammy cold parts. And I just that didn't feel up to lecturing her.

"I'm sorry. Yaya-chan, that was mean of me." she apologized anyway, which surprisingly made me think of the pain a touch bit less. She then moves away and takes something out of the cupboards. I am a bit surprised when she returns with a glass of…

"Orange Juice?" I looked at her in disgust. I hated orange juice… I have no idea why, but I do. I gently placed my hand on hers and tried to push it away.

"I know… But it's good for your cold. I'll give you some water to wash it down with after you drink some medicine." She said in a calm sweet voice, that I'm sure was all in my head. In my head I swore and hope the medicine was strong enough to kill the taste of the orange… because it seems like Hikari wasn't going to take "No" for an answer.

I took the glass from her hand; stared at the tangy looking liquid inside… and noted with growing disgust that its pulp was still there. I felt sicker. I turned to Hikari and asked, "Do I really have to?" in a whiney voice.

She just looked at me knowingly, trying not to smile at my futile attempts to get out of drinking the damn thing.

I sighed in defeat. "Can't blame a sick girl for trying…" I looked at the liquid again and summoned all my courage, in one swift move I place the glass on my lips and did my best to finish the damn thing with as few gulps as possible before my taste buds kicked in. And when it was done, Hikari was laughing at my disgusted expression as I scratched and rubbed my tongue onto my teeth trying to remove as much of the foul liquid from it.

She takes the glass and hands me smaller glass that we usually save for measuring small liquids, like the nearly transparent purplish liquid medicine in it now. I took it without being told and drank… almost savoring its taste for it sure tasted better than the orange to me.

"Here's some water." she hands me a small bottle of water, whose contents was emptied down my throat. She quickly takes the glass and the bottle from me and tells me to get back to bed. I complied after a weak and brief nod. Once I had lain down and Hikari had placed the glasses I had use into our small sink she heads back to her bed and turns off the light.

I'm not sure how long my consciousness lingered before I fell asleep. But hours later… I woke up breaking in a fit of dry and hoarse coughs.

Hikari rushed to my side, still in her pajamas, with a worried look on her face. "Yaya-chan?!..." She looked around before asking, "Would you like some water?"

I nodded very weakly. I would have preferred some tea or hot milk… but I didn't feel up to making a request and was just glad she didn't offer the orange juice. She lifts my head a bit and slowly makes me sip the lukewarm liquid. I gag a little when it passes the wrong way once in a while but I managed to drink the whole serving. Hikari then moves away, after gently setting my head back on my pillow, and I slowly found myself sipping to unconsciousness.

But before I could, Hikari sakes me awake. I looked at her weakly, one eye barely opened, she was kneeling on the floor holding another glass of water and a serving of the medicine again. "Yaya-chan! You should drink some medicine before going back to sleep."

I just shook my head. I didn't want to drink anymore. But she raised my head, and placed the glass near my lips. I refused to drink the medicine. It was hard headed of me… but I didn't think I could bare anymore liquid slither down my throat.

My persistence paid off… Hikari's voice sounded lecturing and a touch angry… but I wasn't really listening. And she took the glass of medicine away from my mouth. I thanked someone… who in particular escapes me, but let's assume its God anyway. But then something happens that I certainly never saw coming.

Hikari presses her lips into mine…

**To be continued…**

_**Please Review!!!**_

**Author's notes:** Oh crap… that took a while. I apologize for the delay… but really I'm just glad I actually started writing this again. I had most trouble on actually wanting to write or continue this after loosing the plot notes I had. I decided to just wing it anyway. As usual a lot of things seem to happen so fast. But that's because we're only dealing with one person's point of view.

One reason I took so long was I've recently gotten into reading. Reading books and novels weren't part of my usual reading list. Mangas and comics did… and when I found an author that really captivated me I couldn't help but read all her works. "Ichimaru Wolfram" tells me that my writing style has changed. I hope that's in a good way… because the number of reviews on my more recent works although most of them positive and encouraging, somehow tell me other fan readers think otherwise. (Yes I want reviews!!! Who doesn't? XD)

I'm not sure when I'll be continuing this. I decided on writing a Code Geass and Naruto story after this. The later one of which is already drafted actually… Then there are my other fanfiction and non-fanfiction projects. So… I suppose whenever inspiration strikes.

Oh yeah... Might I add that this chapter reached 14k words, the highest number in all my chapters. Yay!


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